kkktookmybabyaway

8:45 p.m. • So I had my gay-ass office Christmas party today. Whatever. I just showed up for the end-of-year check we all get. But more importantly this kicks off a period where I will be off work eight of the next nine days. Woo-hoo. Also, this means my new job is quickly approaching. • What ... the ... hell. Well at least these Brits have free government health care.

I'd have to go with this. After all, you'd also be outsourcing your lunacy to other countries. And then when the brown people launch an attack on our land after getting the time to plan thanks to your "diplomacy," the people I usually vote for will be back in office until they double the size of government (yet again). Of course, I'm sure you'd be all about bombing the white folks in furn countries that have a problem with Muslims overrunning their sovereignty.

11:59 p.m. • Just when I thought Bryant Gumbel couldn't get any worse. During the Steeler game, Willie Parker got hurt bad on the second play for Pittsburgh. When it was announced that he broke his fibula, one of Gumbel's first thoughts were, "Now that means Fred Taylor will FINALLY get into a pro-bowl game." Jesus Christ, man, the guy just broke his leg. Can't we wait until later in the game to talk about this sort of thing? And don't think I'm saying this because Parker is a Steeler. Bryant also pissed me off a few weeks ago when he made an ass of himself during a Thursday-night Redskins game. The NFL Network ought to be glad they aren't on any "mainstram" cable packages, because the production value of its NFL games leaves MUCH to be desired. 8 p.m. • (7.5) Pittsburgh @ St. Louis. The Steelers are slumping and the Rams are probably playing better than their record shows. The Black and Gold will score 27.

Which one of the three would have you doing the least amount of harm to society?

Deadline came and went for the Thursday game.

7 p.m. • Well this is just lovely. The better half went out with her parents and while they were driving down a two-lane road, some cunt going the opposite way wanted to pass the person in front of her and went into Mrs. kkk's lane. This driver then hit my father-in-law's car... AND FLED THE MOTHER FUCKING SCENE. Right now the better half told me she's fine, even though the car is not driveable. Oh, yeah. The bitch who fled the scene? The motorist she was trying to pass FOLLOWED HER AND TOOK DOWN HER PLATES. Bitch, you going nowhere. Update to Terror/Smues comments: Here's what happened. It wasn't the motorist who chased down this cunt. It was a driver behind the motorist. And guess what? The reason he did this was because he was hit by a drunk driver two years ago and was in a coma for 28 days. From what I heard, this guy followed the bitch until she pulled over crying hysterically. The guy then went back to the scene. The cops went out to where the bitch was and she was gone. She eventually came back to the scene after Mrs. kkk went to the emergency room by ambulance and said how sorry she was to my mother-in-law. Much to my surprise my in-law didn't do anything but ignore her. I got picked up by my sister-in-law and went to the hospital (there wasn't a car at my house), and when I gave my "She's OK" updates a few hours later, the sister-in-law and mother-in-law were both amazed at how pissed off I was. I was basically saying how "this cunt needs to fucking die." Of course, I thought I was alone outside the hospital but there were several other people on cell phones around the corner of the building who seemed a little ... scared ... of me and my ravings. I don't remember using the "c" word while on the phone, but I was in such a haze I can't remember. (The mother-in-law told the better half I said it, so I'm not going to doubt her.) Mrs. kkk isn't going into work this morning, and I was afraid that she might suffer from "next-day soreness/etc." that usually comes with a car accident, but she felt pretty good when she woke up, so that's a good sign. Also, even though this wasn't too far off from being a head-on collision, the impact wasn't too bad -- the car's sides mostly hit, and the better half doesn't remember being "thrusted" or "thrashed" about. You know, accidents happen. Driving down an icy hill, skidding and hitting another car is an accident. Not seeing a car because it was in that little section of your car that covers up your blind spot, even when you check said spot, is an accident. Bumping into someone in a parking lot because you looked one way, looked another way, then pulling up not knowing the other car was also pulling out right after you looked the "first way" is an accident. Trying to pass someone on a two-lane road, hitting the automobile in the other lane and fleeing the scene is NOT an accident. Oh, and the driver that tracked this bitch down will be getting a "Christmas card" from the kkk household.

My guess is it's 2-4. I'll check the records later. EDIT: Fixed.

From Week 15 AFC EAST Miami Dolphins (Spaceman Spiff) 9-5 < PF: 104, PA: 98, AFC: 6-4, NFC: 3-1, DIV: 1-4 > Buffalo Bills (Bob Barron) 8-6 < PF: 102, PA: 106, AFC: 7-5, NFC: 1-1, DIV: 5-1 > New York Jets (Gert T) 8-6 < PF: 101, PA: 99, AFC: 6-4, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 3-3 > New England Patriots (nl-asshole) 5-9 < PF: 104, PA: 100, AFC: 4-7, NFC: 1-2, DIV: 3-2 > AFC NORTH Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus) 8-6 < PF: 108, PA: 99, AFC: 7-4, NFC: 1-2, DIV: 3-2 > Cincinnati Bengals (Teke) 7-7 < PF: 101, PA: 108, AFC: 6-4, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 4-1 > Cleveland Browns (SFA Jack) 7-7 < PF: 106, PA: 103, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 2-1, DIV: 2-3 > Baltimore Ravens (King PK) 7-7 < PF: 100, PA: 110, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 2-1, DIV: 1-4 > AFC SOUTH Tennessee Titans (Cuban Linx) 8-6 < PF: 108, PA: 94, AFC: 6-4, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 3-2 > Houston Texans (Bored) 6-8 < PF: 107, PA: 110, AFC: 4-6, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 3-1 > Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off) 6-8 < PF: 103, PA: 105, AFC: 5-5, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 2-3 > Indianapolis Colts (Prime Time Andrew Doyle) 5-9 < PF: 93, PA: 113, AFC: 4-6, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 1-3 > AFC WEST Kansas City Chiefs (Alfdogg) 9-5 < PF: 109, PA: 100, AFC: 7-4, NFC: 2-1, DIV: 4-2 > Oakland Raiders (Smues) 7-7 < PF: 106, PA: 100, AFC: 5-5, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 4-1 > San Diego Chargers (Porter) 7-7 < PF: 105, PA: 105, AFC: 5-5, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 2-3 > Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris) 3-11 < PF 101:, PA: 112, AFC: 2-9, NFC: 1-2, DIV: 1-4 > NFC EAST Dallas Cowboys (Hawk 34) 8-5-1 < PF: 100, PA: 97, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 6-3-1, DIV: 2-2-1 > Washington Redskins (Human Fly) 7-6-1 < PF: 109, PA: 106, AFC: 3-1, NFC: 4-5-1, DIV: 2-2-1 > Philadelphia Eagles (Harley Quinn) 7-7 < PF: 109, PA: 109, AFC: 0-3, NFC: 7-4, DIV: 4-2 > New York Giants (Cartman) 7-7 < PF: 97, PA: 98, AFC: 1-1, NFC: 6-6, DIV: 2-4 > NFC NORTH Detroit Lions (Chazz 1998) 9-5 < PF: 111, PA: 107, AFC: 2-1, NFC: 7-4, DIV: 4-1 > Chicago Bears (Agent Of Oblivion) 7-7 < PF: 94, PA: 99, AFC: 3-2, NFC: 4-5, DIV: 2-3 > Green Bay Packers (Vitamin X) 7-7 < PF: 99, PA: 101, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 5-5, DIV: 1-3 > Minnesota Vikings (Danville Wrestling) 3-11 < PF: 101, PA: 115, AFC: 0-3, NFC: 3-8, DIV: 3-3 > NFC SOUTH Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Starvenger) 8-6 < PF: 104, PA: 105, AFC: 3-1, NFC: 5-5, DIV: 3-2 > Carolina Panthers (Fazzle) 8-6 < PF: 103, PA: 97, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 6-4, DIV: 3-2 > New Orleans Saints (Cena’s Writer) 8-6 < PF: 104, PA: 95, AFC: 3-1 , NFC: 5-5, DIV: 2-4 > Atlanta Falcons (King Of The 909) 6-8 < PF: 94, PA: 99, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 4-6, DIV: 3-3 > NFC WEST San Francisco 49ers (Devo) 10-4 < PF: 107, PA: 96, AFC: 2-1, NFC: 8-3, DIV: 5-1 > Seattle Seahawks (Steve Rogers) 9-5 < PF: 113, PA: 100, AFC: 1-2, NFC: 8-3, DIV: 3-3 > St. Louis Rams (Canadian Guitarist) 5-9 < PF: 103, PA: 108, AFC: 0-3, NFC: 5-6, DIV: 3-2 > Arizona Cardinals (Vern Gagne) 4-10 < PF: 89, PA: 116, AFC: 4-0, NFC: 0-10, DIV: 0-5 > AFC EAST: Buffalo swept Miami. New York split the season series with Miami. New York split the season series with Buffalo. nl-asshole is terrible at this contest and should quit. AFC NORTH: Cincinnati swept Baltimore. Pittsburgh is 1-0 on Baltimore. They will meet again Week 17. Cincinnati is 1-0 on Cleveland. They will meet again Week 16. Cincinnati split the season series with Pittsburgh. Cleveland split the season series with Baltimore. Pittsburgh split the season series with Cleveland. AFC SOUTH: Houston split the season series with Tennessee. Jacksonville split the season series with Tennessee. Houston is 1-0 on Jacksonville. They will meet again Week 17. AFC WEST: Kansas City split the season series with Oakland San Diego swept Kansas City. Oakland is 1-0 on San Diego. They will meet again Week 17. NFC EAST: Philly split the season series with New York. Dallas split the season series with New York. Dallas split the season series with Philly. Dallas and Washington tied in their first matchup. They will meet again Week 17. NFC NORTH: Chicago is 1-0 on Green Bay. They will meet again Week 16. Detroit swept Chicago. Detroit is 1-0 on Green Bay. They will meet again Week 17. NFC SOUTH: Tampa Bay is 1-0 on Carolina. They will meet again Week 17. Carolina split the season series with New Orleans. New Orleans split the season series with Tampa Bay. NFC WEST: San Fran swept Seattle. PLAYOFF PICTURE AS OF WEEK 15: These rankings are in no particular order. This is just to give you an idea of who you are grouped with in regards to record. I haven't even begun to figure out regular season tie-breakers outside of head-to-head divisional matchups. AFC: Kansas City Chiefs (Alfdogg) 9-5 ---> Division Leader Miami Dolphins (Spaceman Spiff) 9-5 ---> Division Leader Tennessee Titans (Cuban Linx) 8-6 ---> Division Leader Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus) 8-6 ---> Division Leader Buffalo Bills (Bob Barron) 8-6 New York Jets (Gert T) 8-6 Cincinnati Bengals (Teke) 7-7 Baltimore Ravens (King PK) 7-7 Oakland Raiders (Smues) 7-7 San Diego Chargers (Porter) 7-7 Cleveland Browns (SFA Jack) 7-7 Houston Texans (Bored) 6-8 Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off) 6-8 New England Patriots (nl-asshole) 5-9 Indianapolis Colts (Prime Time Andrew Doyle) 5-9 Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris) 3-11 NFC: San Francisco 49ers (Devo) 10-4 ---> Division Leader Dallas Cowboys (Hawk 34) 8-5-1 ---> Division Leader Detroit Lions (Chazz 1998) 9-5 ---> Division Leader Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Starvenger) 8-6 ---> Division Leader Seattle Seahawks (Steve Rogers) 9-5 Carolina Panthers (Fazzle) 8-6 New Orleans Saints (Cena’s Writer) 8-6 Washington Redskins (Human Fly) 7-6-1 New York Giants (Cartman) 7-7 Philadelphia Eagles (Harley Quinn) 7-7 Chicago Bears (Agent Of Oblivion) 7-7 Green Bay Packers (Vitamin X) 7-7 Atlanta Falcons (King Of The 909) 6-8 St. Louis Rams (Canadian Guitarist) 5-9 Arizona Cardinals (Vern Gagne) 4-10 Minnesota Vikings (Danville Wrestling) 3-11 I generally start paying attention to regular-season tie-breakers that take place outside of each division after Week 16. For those wondering what the tie-breaker rules are, enjoy.

Owie.

What happened?

8:30 p.m. • So the better half was getting paranoid about some pinkish discharge yesterday (if I have to hear about this, so do you) and we moved up the scheduled doctor’s visit a week or so to today. Of couse the pink discharge couldn’t have been from getting prodded during her first visit (and everything else shooting out of her has been clear) but I digress. She rescheduled the appointment to 4:30 p.m. We went straight from work to this place and had 20 minutes to space. When we got to this office, which was on the second floor in some suite complex, I really had to go to the bathroom. Problem was, all the restrooms at this place were locked and this suite lost its key to the men’s room. I had to go down the hall and ask someone at that place for their key to the pisser. I could have walked down the road to a public facility and back because were waiting for 45 minutes. However, we were probably squeezed in so I wasn’t complaining. Shortly after we arrived this uppity bitch came in gabbing on her cell phone. When the receptionist asked her to turn off her cell phone because those devices interfere with the medical equipment, the bitch got an attitude and said, “Where does it say that?” The receptionist then pointed to the THREE SIGNS IN FRONT OF THE BITCH’S FACE THAT SAID “NO CELL PHONES – THEY INTERFERE WITH THE MONITOR EQUIPMENT.” I laughed loud enough to be noticed, and the bitch went over to the room’s one corner. When it was finally the better half’s turn to be prodded, the tech person did her thing and it’s official: Mrs. kkk’s knocked up. The only surprise was that kkk jr. wasn’t as developed as initially thought, which meant the better half got tainted by me sometime in late November rather than in October. That just gives me a few more weeks of listening to the better half bitching about how much her back hurts from dragging around a living being inside of her. It also means that the gender is up for grabs. When we first went to the doctor’s office, she said that if Mrs. kkk got knocked up a while after having sex then there’s a good chance the kid will be a girl. This is because the girly sperm lives longer than the manly sperm. (I’m not saying this – that’s what I was told.) Then again, this makes sense because I’m sure the girl sperm probably nags the boy sperm to the point where the males don’t want to go on living. It’s odd. The wife wants a boy while I’m actually more partial to a girl. I’m not sure why. Part of the reason is because I hate hunting and fishing, and I know jack shit about cars. If kkk jr. has a penis, he’d probably be looking to put it in some guy’s anus once puberty hits due to my un-manliness. Then again, the one thing I’m dreading about having a girl is … well, let me paraphrase these words from one of the better half’s friends, which sums up my fears perfectly. “With a boy you have to worry about one dick. With a girl, you have to worry about everyone’s dick.” However, all this aside, what’s freaking me out is if the baby will be healthy. I guess that’s better than not caring at all. Awww, it has my nose.

But I won't have to marry her –– unless we move further into Westmoreland County or across state lines to West Virginia. And, to quote a Maury Povich guest line, I'm 112% sure I'm not the baby's daddy.

Denver @ Houston (0.5) (8.5) Cincinnati @ San Francisco Arizona @ New Orleans (4.5) Atlanta @ Tampa Bay (3.5) (3.5) Baltimore @ Miami Buffalo @ Cleveland (5.5) (9.5) Green Bay @ St. Louis Jacksonville @ Pittsburgh (3.5) N.Y. Jets @ New England (23.5) (7.5) Seattle @ Carolina (4.5) Tennessee @ Kansas City (10.5) Indianapolis @ Oakland Detroit @ San Diego (10.5) Philadelphia @ Dallas (10.5) Washington @ N.Y. Giants (5.5) Chicago @ Minnesota (9.5) Denver (Canadian Chris 3-11) d Houston (Bored 6-8) 7-5 DEN: DEN/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/JAX/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/MIN/24 HOU: HOU/CIN/AZ/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NE/SEA/KC/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/MIN/24 DIFF: DEN/HOU, NO/AZ, JAX/PIT, TEN/KC, 24/24 Cincinnati (Teke 7-7) d by San Francisco (Devo 10-4) 6-7 CIN: HOU/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/DET/DAL/NYG/MIN/28 SF: DEN/CIN/AZ/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/JAX/NYJ/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/MIN/24 DIFF: HOU/DEN, NO/AZ, PIT/JAX, NE/NYJ, DET/SD Arizona (Vern Gagne 4-10) d by New Orleans (Cena's Writer 8-6) 5-7 AZ: DEN/CIN/AZ/TB/MIA/BUF/GB/PIT/NYJ/SEA/TEN/IND/DET/DAL/NYG/MIN/26 NO: DEN/CIN/AZ/TB/BAL/CLE/STL/JAX/NYJ/SEA/TEN/IND/DET/PHI/NYG/CHI/24 DIFF: MIA/BAL, BUF/CLE, GB/STL, PIT/JAX, DAL/PHI, MIN/CHI, 26/24 Atlanta (King 6-8) d Tampa Bay (Starvenger 8-6) 7-7+TB ATL: HOU/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/JAX/NE/SEA/KC/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/MIN/17(-3=14) TB: HOU/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/MIN/20(-37=17) DIFF: JAX/PIT, KC/TEN, 17/20 Baltimore (KingPK 7-7) d by Miami (Spaceman Spiff 9-5) 6-8 BAL: DEN/CIN/NO/TB/MIA/BUF/GB/JAX/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/DET/DAL/NYG/MIN/17 MIA: HOU/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NE/SEA/KC/IND/SD/PHI/WAS/MIN/19 DIFF: DEN/HOU, MIA/BAL, BUF/CLE, JAX/PIT, TEN/KC, DET/SD, DAL/PHI, NYG/WAS, 17/19 Buffalo (Bob Barron 8-6) d by Cleveland (sfaJack 7-7) 7-10 BUF: DEN/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/BUF/GB/PIT/NYJ/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/CHI/17 CLE: HOU/SF/NO/TB/MIA/CLE/STL/JAX/NYJ/SEA/KC/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/CHI/21 DIFF: DEN/HOU, CIN/SF, BAL/MIA, BUF/CLE, GB/STL, PIT/JAX, TEN/KC Green Bay (Vitamin X 7-7) d St. Louis (Canadian Guitarist 5-9) 8-6 GB: DEN/CIN/AZ/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NE/CAR/TEN/IND/DET/PHI/WAS/CHI/35 STL: DEN/XX/NO/TB/MIA/BUF/GB/PIT/NYJ/SEA/KC/IND/DET/DAL/NYG/CHI/EP DIFF: AZ/NO, BAL/MIA, CLE/BUF, NE/NYJ, CAR/SEA, TEN/KC, PHI/DAL, WAS/NYG, 35/EP Jacksonville (Always Pissed Off 6-8) d by Pittsburgh (Kahran Ramsus 8-6) 7-9 JAX: HOU/CIN/AZ/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/JAX/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/MIN/16 PIT: HOU/SF/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/CHI/24 DIFF: CIN/SF, AZ/NO, JAX/PIT, MIN/CHI, 16/24 N.Y. Jets (Gert T 8-6) d New England (nl-asshole 5-9) 7-5 NYJ: DEN/CIN/AZ/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NYJ/SEA/KC/IND/SD/DAL/WAS/CHI/6 NE: DEN/CIN/NO/ATL/BAL/CLE/STL/PIT/NYJ/SEA/TEN/IND/DET/DAL/NYG/CHI/38 DIFF: AZ/NO, TB/ATL, GB/STL, KC/TEN, SD/DET, WAS/NYG, 6/38 Seattle (Steve Rogers 9-5) d Carolina (Fazzle 8-6) 7-4 SEA: HOU/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NYJ/SEA/KC/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/MIN/27 CAR: DEN/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/BUF/GB/PIT/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/DET/DAL/NYG/MIN/17 DIFF: HOU/DEN, CLE/BUF, NYJ/NE, KC/TEN, SD/DET Tennessee (Cuban Linx 8-6) d by Kansas City (Alfdogg 9-5) 5-6 TEN: DEN/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/BUF/GB/PIT/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/MIN/20 KC: DEN/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NYJ/CAR/KC/IND/DET/DAL/NYG/MIN/24 DIFF: BUF/CLE, NE/NYJ, SEA/CAR, TEN/KC, SD/DET Indianapolis (Prime Time Andrew Doyle 5-9) d Oakland (Smues 7-7) 9-8 IND: HOU//CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NYJ/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/WAS/MIN/28 OAK: DEN/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NYJ/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/WAS/MIN/16 DIFF: HOU/DEN Detroit (Chazz1998 9-5) d San Diego (Porter 7-7) 7-7+TB DET: HOU/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NE/SEA/KC/IND/DET/DAL/WAS/CHI/17(-14=3) SD: XXX/CIN/NO/TB/MIA/CLE/STL/JAX/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/MIN/31(-51=20) DIFF: HOU/XXX, BAL/MIA, GB/STL, PIT/JAX, KC/TEN, DET/SD, WAS/NYG, CHI/MIN, 17/31 Philadelphia (Harley Quinn 7-7) d Dallas (Hawk34 8-5-1) 7-6 PHI: DEN/CIN/AZ/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/PIT/NYJ/SEA/KC/IND/DET/PHI/WAS/CHI/17 DAL: DEN/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/JAX/NE/SEA/KC/IND/DET/DAL/NYG/CHI/29 DIFF: AZ/NO, PIT/JAX, NYJ/NE, PHI/DAL, WAS/NYG Washington (Human Fly 7-6-1) d N.Y. Giants (Cartman 7-7) 7-7+TB WAS: DEN/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/JAX/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/DET/DAL/NYG/CHI/22(-22=0) NYG: HOU/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/BUF/GB/PIT/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/DAL/NYG/CHI/20(-10=10) DIFF: DEN/HOU, CLE/BUF, JAX/PIT, DET/SD, 22/20 Chicago (Agent of Oblivion 7-7) d Minnesota (Danville Wrestling 3-11) 8-8+TB CHI: DEN/SF/NO/TB/BAL/CLE/GB/JAX/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/DET/PHI/NYG/MIN/12(-13=3) MIN: HOU/CIN/NO/TB/BAL/BUF/STL/JAX/NE/SEA/TEN/IND/SD/PHI/NYG/CHI/24(-20=4) DIFF: DEN/HOU, SF/CIN, CLE/BUF, GB/STL, DET/SD, MIN/CHI, 12/24 PLAYOFF PICTURE AS OF WEEK 14: These rankings are in no particular order. This is just to give you an idea of who you are grouped with in regards to record. I haven't even begun to figure out regular season tie-breakers outside of head-to-head divisional matchups. AFC: The only division that has a leader with more than a one-game lead is the South with Cuban Linx (he has two games over Bored with a split in the season series). Tennessee Titans (Cuban Linx) 8-5 ---> Division Leader Kansas City Chiefs (Alfdogg) 8-5 ---> Division Leader Buffalo Bills (Bob Barron) 8-5 ---> Division Leader Miami Dolphins (Spaceman Spiff) 8-5 Cincinnati Bengals (Teke) 7-6 ---> Division Leader New York Jets (Gert T) 7-6 Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus) 7-6 Baltimore Ravens (King PK) 7-6 Oakland Raiders (Smues) 7-6 San Diego Chargers (Porter) 7-6 Cleveland Browns (SFA Jack) 6-7 Houston Texans (Bored) 6-7 Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off) 6-7 New England Patriots (nl-asshole) 5-8 Indianapolis Colts (Prime Time Andrew Doyle) 4-9 Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris) 2-11 NFC: Hawk34 is up by 1.5 games in the East. Chazz is up by two games in the North. Starvenger is up by one game over Cena's Writer and tied with Fazzle with a tie-breaker advantage (for now) in the South. Devo is up by one game in the West. San Francisco 49ers (Devo) 9-4 ---> Division Leader Dallas Cowboys (Hawk 34) 8-4-1 ---> Division Leader Detroit Lions (Chazz 1998) 8-5 ---> Division Leader Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Starvenger) 8-5 ---> Division Leader Carolina Panthers (Fazzle) 8-5 Seattle Seahawks (Steve Rogers) 8-5 New York Giants (Cartman) 7-6 New Orleans Saints (Cena’s Writer) 7-6 Washington Redskins (Human Fly) 6-6-1 Philadelphia Eagles (Harley Quinn) 6-7 Chicago Bears (Agent Of Oblivion) 6-7 Green Bay Packers (Vitamin X) 6-7 Atlanta Falcons (King Of The 909) 5-8 St. Louis Rams (Canadian Guitarist) 5-8 Arizona Cardinals (Vern Gagne) 4-9 Minnesota Vikings (Danville Wrestling) 3-10

Deadline has come and gone.

RE TB: That game wasn't on the board when I had to post spreads, so I usually just go with a generic 3.5-for-the-home-team spread.

11:59 p.m. • So here I am again in the office pulling a 12+ hour shift to get shit done that nobody else cares about getting to our customers. (Well, I'm home now, but I just got back from work so this counts.) Actually, this one is a funny story because my idiot big boss (not the usual “idiot boss” I talk about) just got caught in a lie by one of our directors. Of course, it doesn’t really matter because nothing will be done, but it’s funny nevertheless. Here’s a brief rundown. I’m to publish information for the next several months about something from an outside source within our organization. Boss wants to be the COMMUNICATIONS LIASION, meaning NOTHING goes to me until he APPROVES it. Fair enough. I get no information. I mention my lack of material to the boss on the day of my deadline to collect material for publication. He says he hasn’t received anything from said director, who is the “Communications Liaison” for the other side of this project (all information from her side is supposed to be filtered through her and given to my boss). I smell bullshit because this director TOLD me she sent my boss material. I give this director a call and she’d furious because she says she gave material to my boss WEEKS ago. She wants to talk to my boss. No problem. This is when it gets good. My boss tells the director, after she tells him that she sent him e-mails containing materials she wanted published, that there were no attachments in her e-mails with the information in question. Riiiiiiiight. When I heard this b.s. I told the director that she could go into her “sent” archive and look at the messages she sent out and see if there was an attachment included. (She’s not the most tech-savvy person out there.) Turns out the director didn’t even need to do that because during this conversation between my boss and director my boss was reading a piece of information the director wanted published and thought he was reading from an old document. Nope. He was reading from a document that she e-mailed him – you know, that attachment he said he never got. Oops. Long story short: Because my boss did NOTHING while COMMUNICATIONS LIASION, I get to do a shitload of work on a Saturday. Because as it turns out, the information wasn’t nearly enough to cover the reserved space I was told to set aside. Now if I would have received this information in a timely manner, this wouldn’t have been a big deal. However, when it’s post-deadline it becomes a big deal. But you know what – that’s OK. I spent 12 hours in the office when nobody else was there, and I’ll be spending that time at home on December 28 when everyone else is there. Oh, and I’ll be spending that extra chunk of time at an office Christmas party this Thursday – the office Christmas party to my new job. [Now you could have said that I should have reminded my boss earlier about my lack of material. Fair enough. However, after four years I've learned that it's best to just keep your mouth shut until something is due because I'm dealing with people who can't do their jobs and I'm not their mommy. Believe me, I knew about this lack of content and prepared for it. Because of this, I'm still right on schedule to my bigger deadlines. Oh, yeah, I also had to manually stuff 1,000+ envelopes, which I was told by my boss TWICE that this menial task that really should be outsourced, was more important to do than the job I was hired to perform. Any more questions as to why a) I'm leaving, and b) I try to keep my distance from these people?] It’s odd. I’m seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, and I must admit this is a pretty awesome feeling. The last time I left a job to take another one in the immediate vicinity was in 1995 when I was in community college. (Well, that job I went to I ended up getting fired from, so if you want to count that one instead then my last time I jumped jobs was 1996.) Otherwise, every job I’ve had since then I left because I was moving 3-5 hours away. Man is this a great feeling. You think about “well, this will be the last time I have to deal with this shit,” or “no problem, I won’t have to bother with this again.” My only question now is when should I give my notice. Here’s my problem. I’m an hourly employee, which I prefer because then you don’t get fucked over (as much) when it comes to what you work and what you get paid for. We have pay periods that span two weeks. I have four days off during the week of December 24-28 (two holiday, one vacation, one from the hours I worked above). If I give my notice now, I wouldn’t be surprised if they tried to screw me out of this money. So I have to wait until Thursday January 3 when my check gets direct deposited at 12:01 a.m. before saying “see ya.” Now I would stay two weeks after the first week of January, but there’s a catch. I would want my vacation/sick days for 2008 cashed out. In advance. I know they would never do that, so the only thing I’m pondering is this: 1) Do I come in, give my resignation, say “see ya” and leave? or 2) Do I just put my letter on my boss’ desk and disappear with all my belongings? I’m still undecided on this one. As much as I want to see the look of shock (or perhaps lack thereof), I think it would be equally awesome just to have me like I was never there and when they go into my office all they see is nothing. Either way, I got about two weeks to decide. 8 p.m. • Gimmie Cincy over the 49ers.

I didn't know about it either until someone said something about it here. Deadline has come and gone for the Saturday game. (Is it even on now?)

FYI: Due to working at the office tonight, I probably won't be able to post PM'd picks regarding tonight's game when it starts.

9 p.m. • So one of my many unfunny running gags is the “one of the worst things you can do to a Muslim male” quips I occasionally do around here. Could another one of these lines be “global warming causes fill-in-the-blank.” • I heard this story on the radio today and had to roll my eyes. I wonder why? How about because those that don’t pull all-nighters have already STUDIED and actually took the time to LEARN? I remember in college I transferred my credits from a community college to a four-year institution. Even though all my credits transferred, there were a few “intro” classes I had to sit through. So there I was, one of the few “upper classmen” in a room full of freshmen (and women, wouldn’t want to offend anyone). I was an oddball because I actually completed my midterm assignment early and actually turned in my work a few days before it was due. However, I remember hearing a few of my younger classmates talk to one another on the day this paper was due and bragging about how late they stayed up the night before to complete this assignment. A week or two later I heard these same people complain about the grade they got. One of my favorite lines was, “This isn’t fair. Do you know how long I worked on this?” Oh, and want to know the source of this survey? One-hundred twenty students? Good God. Agreed. Plus you are in such a rush that you don’t really accomplish anything. Whenever I’m working on a project, I never turn it in on the same day I produce the material. Unless I’m given something on the same day it’s due, I’ll always complete an assignment, leave for the day and look over it the next day. Works for me.

The dead ... write?

8:30 p.m. • Oh Lenny Dykstra David Segui Larry Bigbie Brian Roberts Jack Cust Tim Laker Josias Manzanillo Todd Hundley Mark Carreon Hal Morris Matt Franco Rondell White Andy Pettitte Roger Clemens Chuck Knoblauch Jason Grimsley Gregg Zaun David Justice F.P. Santangelo Glenallen Hill Mo Vaughn Denny Neagle Ron Villone Ryan Franklin Chris Donnels Todd Williams Phil Hiatt Todd Pratt Kevin Young Mike Lansing Cody McKay Kent Mercker Adam Piatt Miguel Tejada Jason Christiansen Mike Stanton Stephen Randolph Jerry Hairston Paul Lo Duca Adam Riggs Bart Miadich Fernando Vina Kevin Brown Eric Gagne Mike Bell Matt Herges Gary Bennett Jim Parque Brendan Donnelly Chad Allen Jeff Williams Exavier "Nook" Logan Howie Clark Paxton Crawford Ken Caminiti Rafael Palmeiro Luis Perez Derrick Turnbow Ricky Bones Ricky Stone Rick Ankiel David Bell Paul Byrd Jose Canseco Jay Gibbons Troy Glaus Jason Grimsley Jose Guillen Darren Holmes Gary Matthews Jr. John Rocker Scott Schoeneweis Ismael Valdez Matt Williams Steve Woodard Benito Santiago Gary Sheffield Randy Velarde Jason Giambi Jeremy Giambi Bobby Estalella Barry Bonds Marvin Benard How could you do it – CHEATING!?!?!? My national pastime is RUINED~! 8:15 p.m. • Denver will beat Houston. I was filling in my kkk Bowl scores so I get a break.

Wow, you BoSox fans really hold a grudge. And Roger didn't take roids -- he has an INTENSE off-season workout. I know. I saw him do it on TV.

Deadline for Thursday's game has come and gone.

9:15 p.m. • So I’m in a bit of a predicament. A week or so ago I got the James Bond DVDs – all four volumes – and finally got around to opening them up and checking them for quality and all that other stuff. I noticed that in two of the 20 disc cases that some of those little prong thingys are busted off and “Goldeneye” seems to have a noticeable ding. Now do I go back and get these discs exchanged? I don’t buy used DVDs because I don’t trust the viewing quality. CDs and video games are fine. If a used CD has a skipped track, then I just move to the next song. If a movie has a similar malfunction then the whole viewing experience is gone. However, this is America. The land of rugged individualism. It’s not like I didn’t actually pay retail price for these movies. Besides, I fast-forwarded through “Goldeneye” last night and everything was fine. I also moved the two discs from the busted prong holders and put each one on the other prong thingy in each disc case. I don’t really watch special features anyway, so if there was going to be any damage done it would be to those discs. Now my biggest problem is to decide whether or not to watch these movies in chronological order or by the order in which they are place in each of these four volumes followed by “Casino Royals.” What a quandary. Good thing I don’t have anything else to fret about. • Peep this. What I find funny is the dateline to this story: Detroit. Then I read the next paragraph. Woo-hoo – hometown representin’. • I was flipping channels tonight and saw that I had the OMGFAUXBIGBIZNESSCHANNELLOL2007~! Whatever. Then I saw who was on -- my n*gga Dave Ramsey. I guess he does an hourlong show 8-9 p.m. Cool beans. I'm gonig to have to remember this is on. Could you see these bureaucrats trying to tell Muslims or other freedom-haters that they can't burn Old Gloy due to pollution concerns?

Kotz is gone?