The Amazing Rando

Jim Ross hits Tazz with a water pitcher.

Pre-Attitude Era WWE is the pocket universe.

A bald Kane with a mask would just look strange. The "real Kane" isn't bald. Why would he say "the real Kane can just go back under the hood" if it was the "real Kane" that just showed up with his mask on. Maybe he screwed up. In our fantasy world the real Kane is the masked one, and the fake Kane is the bald one.

Earth-2 Snitsky is Pro-Life. Earth-2 Goldust is Jerry Lawler.

A bald Kane with a mask would just look strange. The "real Kane" isn't bald.

Oh my God, I bet that's the angle they run with. Paul Bearer has had the real Kane locked up again, and he just escaped! It makes an odd sort of sense. Why Kane was the "happy freak" character in fall 2002, why it took only one tombstone for Taker to beat him at WMXX, why he suddenly had the desire to have a family via Lita in 2004. I can see them using it as a ret con for the past 4 years of crap they've done to the character. Kane has more retcon than Superman's origins. So there's an Earth-1 Kane and an Earth-2 Kane? It all makes sense. Now all we need is for Owen Hart to come back from the dead via one of Kaneboy-Prime's punches, and we're all set. Kaneboy-Prime --> The Amazing Red

Executive Assistant, McMahon said none of the candidates measured up to his standards for general manager. Too bad he was thinking of the 90s Bulls and Shelley Winters. Yes, the placement of the "Reply" but can be confusing. AH HELL.... I blame Kane.

Oh my God, I bet that's the angle they run with. Paul Bearer has had the real Kane locked up again, and he just escaped! It makes an odd sort of sense. Why Kane was the "happy freak" character in fall 2002, why it took only one tombstone for Taker to beat him at WMXX, why he suddenly had the desire to have a family via Lita in 2004. I can see them using it as a ret con for the past 4 years of crap they've done to the character. Kane has more retcon than Superman's origins.

"So the Bart we've had all along is the EVIL Bart?"

So...Cena isn't facing Umaga? Maybe he's facing... FAKE KAAAAANE? ...or maybe Johnny Nitro...he never fought him before. he's never faced RVD.

Billy and Chuck could be on commentary. They could show a replay of the fake Kane's debut. But Fake Kane wasn't "gay", Viscerape was though.

Billy and Chuck could be on commentary.

Hilarity ensues as Coach continues to look for HHH, even after this segment.

Brrrrrrrrrrrrokeback Viscerrrra, HA-HA!

would that be a Hurri... ....KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANE?

Next week, Fake Kane bring out his tag partner Fake X-pac, who will be played by Sean Waltman.

Kane and Fake Kane would make a fucking awesome tag team. Sidenote: The Main Event is now HHH vs. Kenny for Kane's mask.

I would only wish it was Kevin Nash as Fake Kane, given that Kane was Fake Diesel

It looks like 80s Hair Metal Kane

That...That...THAT'S GOTTA BE ... KAAAAAAAANE!

That DDT was about as "thunderous" as one hand clapping.

Executive Assistant, McMahon said none of the candidates measured up to his standards for general manager. Too bad he was thinking of the 90s Bulls and Shelley Winters.

Exec Assistant. I guess they are going to stretch it out for the GM role or they'll just have Coach run things via McMahon's orders until Coach inevitably fucks up and Vince hires a real GM to handle business. ...if you weeeeeeeeeeell

It's Shelton Young, his pet cat Malia on his Mama's lap at home, watching on.

Vince should call Coach "Johnnycakes"