Mecha Mummy

The Key (PG-13) (Action/Comedy) Starring Jackie Chan and Reese Witherspoon Also Featuring Jet Li, Seth Green, Lucy Liu, and Alyson Hannigan Directed by John Woo Screenplay by Bobby Farrelly and Steve Oedekerk Projected Budget Range: $60-69 Million Planned Release Date: July Projected Box Office Receipts: $19.71 million (Opening Weekend) $80.90 million (Total Domestic Gross) Chance of getting Oscar Nomination: 1% Chance of winning at least one Oscar: Slim to None Critic Most Likely to Praise: Jay Carr, Boston Globe Critic Most Likely to Skewer: Matthew Abrams, Chucklehound.com

Gaaah, those sound hilarious. Too bad I started watching WWF after that...

Indeed. An empty seat speaks far louder than any t-shirt you could wear to an event. I concur. No point in ordering that, really...

Cage match, duh.

Well, if so, hopefully they include the stuff that happened after the match as well. Still, WHOOOOOO! And considering that Trish has had what, three good matches... oh, wait, nobody's buying it for the extra matches anyway.

Yeah, Batista just had the enforcer role, which is something he can actually do (His powerbombs and spinebusters DO look good). Just don't let him wrestle.

TESTICLES was one of the highlights of Raw? This is an amusing list, but NOBODY should be able to get away with saying that.

Lawler also seems to not suck as much without JR around. I actually preferred Coachman and King over JR and King. Lawler just kind of fell apart when... um, the brand extension started too. Okay, that's kinda weird.

Hm. Maybe he's still a heel, but his plan is to ruin Raw with bad announcing.

Yeah. I'd say when King came back and the brand extension started. Somehow that made him even worse. The funniest thing is that both King and JR are better announcers when not with each other.

Meanwhile, at one point my sister had a crush on one-fourth of the WWE roster. *Cough*

Orlando Jordan is nothing special at all.

Version 1.0 beat Rikishi? THANK YOU GOD. And wow, an actual angle for Jamie Noble. That shocks me.

Rhyno and Benoit are on VELOCITY? This. Can't. Be. Good.

Well, it's in MSG, so the tapings should be over right about now, shouldn't they?

They get the deluxe treatment. They get to sit in a room with HHH for the remainder of the show. HHH: Name a wrestler, any wrestler. Girl: Um, what do you mean? HHH: I SAID NAME A WRESTLER! Girl: uh, oh, The Rock! HHH: I beat him. Fun game, isn't it? Ask me another. Girl: We really must be going... HHH: NAME ANOTHER FUCKING WRESTLER! Girl: Okay, fine! Um... Rey Mysterio! HHH: ... Get the fuck out of here, dammit! Who invited you, anyway?

Apparently Cade pins Rosey after hitting a HIGH KNEE. Okay, I thought a CROSSBODY was a bad finisher... Oh, and Heat turned bad after Raven was released and the Masterpeice angle died.

Kane is REALLY doomed now.

He's done ALREADY? Wow, that was quick.

A NEW YORK OFFICE is the big announcement? Ripoff.

Whose "Any one of us can defend the title" schtick in their heyday is currently being used by Triple X, which comprises of Low-Ki, Elix Skipper, and CHRISTOPHER DANIELS.

"He get's the heart a'pumpin', he gets the party jumpin', he's the Match-o Man..."

The Matt Hardy shirt is perfectly fine on me since my name is Mat, and the front is good.

Trivia247 Banky GameCop TheGame2705 The Amazing Rando Mole Mr. Zsasz Memphis

I'm going to second HBK w/ bowl cut.