Toshiaki Koala

You saw a guy getting stabbed? Awesome.

Yeah, that was amazing. *Fly buzzes in front of Rock, who brushes it away* KURT: Well, we know what flies are attracted to.

"Dey's a lady! Dey's a lady in the men's bathroom!" Enough said. Big Show also deserves a mention - the first appearance of the Showster may be the single funniest moment in wrestling history. And Bossman was brilliant during his feud with Show. He really believed in his character, making it all the more hilarious. He will be missed.

If it's supposed to be satire, it may very well be the least funny thing man has ever created. Otherwise, it actually is fairly amusing.

How would they fit a wrestling ring in New Jack's cell?

I've never heard this song, but it sure as hell ought to be Gene Snitsky's entrance theme. Come on, you knew it was only a matter of time before Snitsky made it into this thread.

Kenta Kobashi, Chris Benoit, and Samoa Joe are all great wrestlers. But the all-important question must be asked: do they kill babies? And the answer to that question is NO. Therefore, the wrestler of the year can only be... G E N E S N I T S K Y Bitches!

Maven vs. Benjamin actually sounds like a match Vince would book. "So... we've got all these black guys on the roster. What should we do with them?" "Just smush them together in the same match. That way nobody else has to wrestle them." "Brilliant!"

This was posted on the DVDVR board, so some of you may have already seen it, but I had to bring it to TSM as it's possibly the greatest thing I've ever seen. A truncated version is now in my signature. Enjoy.

Oh, and get this... Phinnaeus is the girl. Yeah, that was stupider.

You know those books that are hollowed out in the middle, to hide things in? I bet HHH's book is one of those with a needle inside.

Tee-hee! Them Dubya Dubya Eee writers sure are clever folks.

January 2005: Chuck Palumbo month? Or maybe Hardcore Hol... wait a minute... GODDAMMIT!

I'm actually kind of glad I don't know what the "WON qualifications" are. Makes me feel somehow pure, virginal...

Vader was supposed to win the WWF title from Shawn Michaels but Shawn didn't feel like doing the job. Vader was shunted to the midcard, his career reaching an all-time low when he declared himself to be "just a fat piece of shit" after losing a mask vs. mask with Kane at Over The Edge 1998. Great Sasuke was supposed to be the cornerstone of the Light-Heavyweight division, but Taka got more heat and ol' Masanori was shipped back to Japan. Thanks to this mishap, he still has a career (I read this in S**** K****'s review of Canadian Stampede). Mankind was supposed to win the WWF title from Shawn Michaels (sound familiar?) at Mindgames but Shawn didn't want to job, so he used his backstage clout to get the now-famous DQ finish booked instead (also a tidbit from an SK rant). Road Dogg has executed a moonsault on more than one occasion.

The real Ganso bomb, done by Kawada, is not a finisher. Misawa and Mutoh both kicked out of it (though they shouldn't have.) The most brutal and dangerous move I've ever seen was the inverted top-rope DDT Dean Malenko used to finish of Scott Taylor at Backlash 2000. Basically, Scotty went for a superplex, and while both men were in the air, Dean reversed the momentum and dropped Scotty on his head. Unbelievably sick, and as far as I know it's only been done once.

Undertaker and Sara burying (figuratively) DDP by making him job in every single encounter. Foley losing the retirement match at No Way Out 2000. Sasuke botching the springboard rana finish in his match against Lyger at J-Cup 1994. Come to think of it, any time a hard-working wrestler seriously botches a move. Just reading about Lesnar's vertical SSP at Mania XIX made me feel sorry for the guy. Finding out that the Big Bossman had passed away. In general, the way most cruiserweights and indy wrestlers are treated by the WWE. (I guess Owen dying is too obvious for anyone to mention.)

Winston Churchill. ... OK, let's see... 1. Abraham Lincoln - Yes, "he freed the slaves" has become cliché, but his accomplishments as President are amazing no matter how you look at it. 2. George Washington - The Real George W, he set the standard. We can thank him for the fact that the US is still a democratic republic today. 3. FDR - Saved America from the Depression, a genuinely virtuous person. One of our most liberal presidents, and yet kkk endorses him; that says a lot! 4. Gene Snitsky - He kills babies. 5. Thomas A. Edison - Where would we be without his inventions? Honorable Mentions go to MLK, Thomas Jefferson, Patton, and Clarence Boddicker.

Yes! The big "director's cut" rerelease in 1994 was thwarted because someone at the studio submitted the film to the ratings board, who rated it NC-17. They eventually won the R rating back by arguing the fact that the same version had received an R in 1969. The final massacre is still among the top five action scenes ever, even after Woo, Scarface, Kill Bill, etc. Interestingly, the Wild Bunch was rated X when first screened by the MPAA in 1969. To obtain an R, the line "her nipple was as big as my thumb" had to be removed.

Blow-Up was the first theatrical film to show boobs.

Ummm... what about RIC FLAIR? He was pretty good, as I recall.

Be careful! WWE representatives might be reading this.

Yeah, before he started, you know, doing actual moves.

His dropkick sucks, BTW. Dennis Knight did a better one in a match with Regal during his Naked Mideon days.

Swiped from the DVDVR board: In all seriousness - Misawa and Furio at one show, together? Shit, I might actually have to go to this! Although calling Ogawa a legend may be a bit of a stretch...