Has anyone else considered that it's not terrorism

[Guest Samurai_Goat]

Indeed I am, but I still desire clairification. If that's how you spell it. If not, than something that sounds a lot like clairification.

[Guest Spaceman Spiff]

Check out this site

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Clarification. You had one too many i's, but close enough.

[Guest danielisthor]

You can't do that on Telivision = one of the original shows on Nick.

[Guest Samurai_Goat]

Boy, we went from (Marney punches hole through mans chest): "God is not a dyke!" to "Hey, aren't Nickelodian shows great?" Of course, divine sexuality and childrens television aren't that far off, so it's not all that surprising, really.

[Guest Midnight Express83]

Well anything I can do to make sure Rob doesn't come back in here and post more mindnumbing bullshit.

[Guest Samurai_Goat]

Yes. First you need twelve catipults and a penguin. The rest should be obvious.

[Guest EricMM]

...and entertaining.

 

Really. I dunno what I was thinking talking to RJS. People like him don't learn from reality, they have this STUPID idea that the bible was somehow crafted by god. It's not. It was written by men.

 

I believe a lot of what's in the bible. But I also disbelieve a lot of it. It's not inerrible (word?) it's just another books. Books can contain truth, but they can also contain myth.

 

RJS wouldn't learn facts, didn't want to learn facts, couldn't prove anything, he literally never TRIED to prove any of his (unprovable) "facts" but merely tried to prove how our facts were wrong by saying "Evolution doesn't work. See, I proved evolution doesn't work." Such bullshit.

[Guest HungryJack]

Well, you also have to consider that most Christians are taught that the men(and women) who wrote the Bible were divinely inspired, so in a sense, yes, the Bible WAS crafted by God, God just passed own what he wanted written to the writers.

 

And maybe RJS is simply a devout Christian???

 

there are people who don't believe in Evolution, if that's what they wanna believe , let 'em.....

 

It's not like it'll matter for any of us....

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

Not wanting to believe humans evolved from apes is one thing, but not believing evolution is a factual biological concept is another.

 

He can worship whatever he wants, and I couldn't possibly give a shit. It's just when things like the great deluge and a 6000 year old planet get passed off as "fact" that I start getting mouthy.

 

Animals evolve, and do not fit on a big boat.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

maybe RJS is simply a devout Christian???

Whatfuckingever. I'm ashamed that people like him share my faith. He isn't devout, he's a bloody idiot. "Devout" is not a synonym for "stupid" or "uneducated," and you don't get happy-face stickers at Mass for how loudly you scream every word of Genesis.

 

"Question with boldness even the existence of a god; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason than that of blindfolded fear."

- Thomas Jefferson

 

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same god who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."

- Galileo Galilei

 

Not wanting to believe humans evolved from apes is one thing, but not believing evolution is a factual biological concept is another

Actually they're the same thing. And it's wrong. In both forms.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

I can see how a creationist can disagree with man evolving from apes; they're wrong, but I can understand why they disagree, since it basically takes page 8 or whatever of the bible, and uses it as toilet paper.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Sure, because if you decide that any one thing is infallible you're bound to disagree with something else eventually. But the fact of man's ascent from apes is part and parcel of the fact of evolution and not separable from it in any context. You're doing no favours to anyone by saying that people like RJS can have one and deny the other without criticism.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

You aren't accusing me of defending Robstone are you?

 

ARE YOU?

[Guest Cancer Marney]

I just did.

 

Suck it up!

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

You fucking democrat, I just spent something like 3 pages ripping that guy a new one and dashing his beliefs against jagged unholy rocks, and now you're accusing me of DEFENDING him..ye gods.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

If you don't want to be called on the carpet, kid, don't you ever try to make things comfortable for a creationist. He doesn't get to pick and choose between different forms of evolution. The evidence for the evolution of man is overwhelming, as is the evidence for the evolution of all other life. Saying that the first is just a matter of belief but the second is fact in a way the first is not constitutes the provision of aid and comfort to the enemy, and unless you retract your statement and apologise, I'll see you hang.

Dirty traitorous scum.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

I said I can see why they could DISAGREE with it, they're still fuckin' retarded. That's the bottom line here, not "comforting the enemy."

Of course they can't pick and chose which is correct and which isn't, a fact is a fact, but they can still choose to ignore one or the other or both, considering faith is essentially based on ignorance.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Seeing why they could disagree isn't the bottom line, the bottom line is whether they're right or wrong. And they're SO wrong.

 

Judgement Day

 

God: Why would I create anyone from a rib? A rib?! What the hell is wrong with you? I set things up so you get this big wonderful brain, and what do you do? You ignore it. You ignore it! There's gratitude for ya. You think I have nothing better to do than sit around on My ass making you people one at a time? What do you think I am, stupid? You think I can't hit the billiard balls just right?

 

Creationist: Uh... I... n-n-no, your Divine, uh, Most High Holiness... I mean...

 

God: Oh, Me. Stop kissing My ass, fer chrissakes.

 

Jesus: Mom! Don't take My Name in vain.

 

God: Quiet, You.

 

Random archangel, whispering to creationist: Look, just walk away for now. She really doesn't like it when She has to deal with you people twice in a row, and there were a bunch of you building those dumb old boats and filling them up with sheep when Armageddon rolled around... y'know, I still don't get the sheep, man. What were you thinking?

 

Creationist, mumbling: Forget it. Just... oh, forget it.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

hey, totally agreed on the right and wrong thing. Besides, you're the one that entertains the notion of god, not me.

 

I die and go before the pearly gates..

 

god: Oh, shit.

 

me: so, this is heaven, huh? Guess I was wrong, now gimme a hummer.

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Continuing...

 

God: A hummer? No, I don't think so. Start licking My feet, boy. You've got a lot of making up to do. A girl doesn't like to be told She doesn't even fucking exist for decades on end. A hummer?! <snaps fingers> On what, anyway?

 

Agent, looking down: NOOO!

 

God: Be good and you'll get it back. Someday. Maybe.

 

Agent sobbing silently

 

God: C'mon, c'mon, I don't have all eternity. Well, actually, I do, but get licking anyway.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

::slips god "the shocker"::

 

"C'mon Mary, you can get in on this, too."

[Guest Cancer Marney]

<some look>

[Guest J*ingus]

Jingus: (laughter) I'll be in the Kobashi vs. Steamboat Eternity Match room if anyone needs me.

[Guest Midnight Express83]

::goes to the Horsemen room to watch nothing but the great years over and over again:: Whats next up for me? Oooooh...Simpsons room.

[Guest Spaceman Spiff]

So, wait. If heaven is comprised of non-stop sweet, tender, Sapphic love, then what's going on in hell? Is it a sausage-fest?

[Guest Cancer Marney]

Only appropriate, I'd imagine.

[Guest Spaceman Spiff]

::shudders::

 

must...only...do...good...from...now...on...

[Guest Samurai_Goat]

Sausage fest? Isn't that a holiday in Germany?

 

And removing a mans penis isn't exactly " non-stop sweet, tender, Sapphic love", but, hey, that punk deserved it. Start licking, boy. You should be grateful for the bloody opportunity. If God popped up and said, asked, or forcefully implied I should lick God's feet, than I'd do it in about 0.14 seconds, more or less human reaction time. At least, I think that's it. Isn't human reaction time 1/7th of a second? Whatever, I do it pretty frickin' quick.

[Guest Midnight Express83]

Heaven is you are lucky to kiss God's feet.

 

Hell is you are lucky if you DON'T have to slob the knob for Satan(90% of all males) Or toss the shit filled salad(EVERYONE).