The REAL One and Only ESTABLISHMENT~! Thread

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Actually, we're here to do what we hate seeing happen on Raw: Hold people down and be assholes.

 

Okay, so the second part is for CWM and Anglesault. I'm the benevolent leader who has to keep the young firebrands in check.

 

We also band together to combat trolls and get people banned who stink up the board, like Prince Paul.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest MrRant]

I apparently have missed much.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Yes you have....

 

DANCING GIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Erm, now that I've calmed down, you need to change your subtitle to reflect your Establishedness.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest MrRant]

Yes behold and bow down before Dancing Gir!

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Gir will now be the Establishment's official Mascot.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kinetic]

It's been established that this thread is not all that entertaining to read in one sitting. And after working eight hours and sitting through Triple H fucking a corpse...I expected better of you people. I really did.

 

Nah, I'm just kidding. You guys are great! ::Establishment group hug:: And Flyboy, I have a special message for you: I saw what Pinnacle said about you in that other thread and it really got my blood boiling. I mean, a SMUDGE? I've seen your picture and you put a lot of these Abilene-area smudges to shame. In fact, I'm willing to bet that you'd get at least a 15% higher rating on Hot Or Not than any old smudge we could find. You're a great guy. ::gives Flyboy HOTYC::

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

HOTYC

 

Hottie of the Year Candidate nomination?

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kinetic]

Hug Of The Year Candidate. It's one of the three or four funny things El Cubano ever said.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Ha. Good one. Established AND loves a good hug? Damn, that's one helluva hug.

 

I wonder what an ESTABLISHED~! hug feels like. We Established types are so rare, to get two in the same place is like hearing an Oscar nomination for the Jackass movie, it will never happen, but dammit it should.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kinetic]

An established hug is like being embraced by God. After it's over, you're not even really sure that it happened. All you know is that you feel a tremendous warmth and a sense of contentment all over. Two established people hugging would tear a hole in all time and space, thus causing the universe as we know it to cease. So come The Gathering, do attempt to restrain yourself. Not because I wouldn't enjoy a hug from someone as established as yourself, but for the good of humanity.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Hmm... I think I know what the problem is here...

 

What if Leena is ESTABLISHED~! by then (as she most assuredly will be) and wants a hug?

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kinetic]

I'd be forced to use my false arms, in that situation. You could take your chances, though. Your overwhelming establishment and her relatively new establishment might offset each other, causing only a small hole in the universe that eats Donovan McNabb, who is never seen again. I actually encourage you to hug Alina now. Knock yourself out.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

But what if Warren Sapp is sacking McNabb at the moment of the actual hug? WHAT ABOUT WARREN, I ASK???

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kinetic]

To which I reply, "What are the odds of Sapp sacking McNabb at that very moment? Even if Tampa and Philly WERE playing then and Sapp WAS closing in on McNabb in the backfield, McNabb could simply throw a few moves at him and proceed to run 70 yards for a touchdown. You know, the way he ALWAYS FUCKING DOES AGAINST THE BUCS?! GOD BE DAMNED!!" But, yeah, the Bucs aren't scheduled to play the Eagles for the rest of the regular season and the playoffs don't start until after The Gathering. So...it isn't going to happen.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Hmm, if a simple hug does that, what does... further contact do?

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kinetic]

I fear to speculate, dear established Kotz.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Well, we're just going to have to take that risk!!!

 

You're obviously cautious, and rightly so, so I'll be the risk-taker of the group and go for it.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Since no one has voiced any objections, I'll take that as a green light.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kinetic]

Oh, uh...I see what's going on here! How dare you?! Not only threatening the continued existence of the human race, but trying to horn in on my action! Really, though, if you want to share a hotel room in DC with her long-distance-phone-call-making ass, go right ahead. As for me, I'll be wrapping my roommate in a sleeping bag and sneaking him in so I only have to pay for one person. I'll also be disconnecting the phone and making sure no porn is ordered and nothing's taken from the minibar. I'm not made of money, you know.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

As long as you don't accidentally suffocate and pull a Kane on him, do whatever you please.

 

The Establishment frowns on necrophilia.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kinetic]

I think I'm Established enough to know that.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Sometimes even Established ones have lapses of judgment.

 

Besides, I don't think I'd let my roommate make long-distance calls either unless they had them an f'n calling card. And if I share a room with who I'd hope to share a room with, I doubt they'd have time or want to be on the phone.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Incandenza]

I was just thinking...

 

Isn't it great being Established?

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Yes, Inc, it is. It really really is.

 

The people we vote in each week will never be as Established as us, the same as the last four that were voted in aren't as Established as the Original Six.

 

Damn, we rule.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest Kinetic]

It really is great. I'm the happiest I've ever been. ::looks over shoulder for Triple H::

[Guest Incandenza]

How many more people are we going to vote in? There has to be a cut-off point.

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Just don't participate in any TLC matches and make sure people in the back can't come out onto the stage, and you'll be fine, fellow Established Kinetic.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge

[Guest treble charged]

What's the 'established scale' then?

 

If the original 6 are more established than the latest 4, on a scale of 1 to 10 (with 10 being the most established), where do I, and my fellow recent inductees lie?

 

EDIT: 'lastest' WTF?!?!? Who am I? cobainwasmurdereeerdredreredreredrred?

[Guest Kotzenjunge]

Like I told CallMeDanWHAT?ISaidCallMeDan, it'll be 20, or at the absolute most, it'll be 25.

 

NO MORE THAN 25, EVER.

 

An Established One has spoken.

 

Fo sheez,

Kotzenjunge