Guest DrTom Report post Posted January 2, 2003 I just got notice of this in an email at work. This will definitely change the way we watch TV. ------ All Shows brought to you by Exxon-Mobile & Texaco...... "You can trust your Suburban to the man who wears the turban!" SUNDAY: 0800 - My 33 Sons 0830 - Osama Knows Best 0900 - I Dream of Mohammed 0930 - Let's Mecca Deal 1000 - The Kabul Hillbillies MONDAY: 0800 - Husseinfeld 0900 - Mad About Everything 0930 - Monday Night Stoning - "Are you ready for some stoning?" 1000 - Win Bin Laden's Money 1030 - Allah McBeal TUESDAY: 0800 - Wheel of Terror 0830 - The Price is Right if Osama Says it's Right 0900 - Children are Forbidden from Saying the Darndest Things 0930 - Taliban's Wackiest Public Execution Bloopers WEDNESDAY: 0800 - Tales from the Koran 0830 - When Kurds Attack 0900 - Two Guys, a Girl, and Pita Bread 0930 - Just Shoot Everyone 1000 - Veilwatch 1100 - This Old Cave THURSDAY: 0800 - Star Trek: The Next Genocide 0830 - CSI: Baghdad 0900 - Veronica's Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless Dresses and Veils 0930 - Married with 139 Children 1000 - Eye for an Eye Witness News FRIDAY: 0800 - Spongebob Squareturban 0830 - Who's Koran Is It Anyway? 0900 - Teletalibans 1000 - Survivor: Iraqi Prison 1100 - My Favorite Kalashnikov 1200 - Beat The Press SATURDAY: 0800 - Judge Jihad 0830 - Suddenly Sanctions 0900 - Who Wants to Marry a Terrorist Millionaire? 0930 - Cave and Garden Television 1000 - No-Witness News Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kotzenjunge Report post Posted January 2, 2003 This week on Husseinfeld... (keyboard music, shot of the side of an apartment building. Inside, Sadaam and Osama are talking while Sadaam makes a bowl of cereal) Osama: I'm telling you Sadaam, this girl was just amazing! Sadaam: Well, did you approach her or anything? Osama: I would have, but when I tried to approach her, she did the Burqa Shuffle. Sadaam: Ah, the downfall of many a man. Osama: It was like she was a rattlesnake, poised to bite me if I went near! I was terrified! Sadaam: So how'd you react to the Shuffle? Osama: I tried a counter-shuffle with my tunic, but it just wasn't the same. Sadaam: The out-shuffle. You, my friend, were owned. Osama: By a pathetic, vermin-level female! (the door bursts open, and King Fahd slides into the apartment) Fahd: Sadaam, you got any oil well cappers? One of my rigs is on fire again. Sadaam: Look in your apartment. Fahd: Oh yeah... still haven't given those back to you, have I? What's it been? A month? Year? Sadaam: Try twelve years, Fahd. (Fahd has a miniature seizure of reaction) Osama: Fahd, you ever been out-shuffled? Fahd: Oh yeah, lots of times. Osama: Is there a way to recover one's face and punish the woman for her impudence? Fahd: I say you and those Taliban friends of yours find this girl and torture her. Osama: I see. Good plan. I'm off to do that now. (Osama leaves) Fahd: We still on for those executions later? Sadaam: I can't, I've got an invasion to attempt to fight off. Fahd: Oh? Sadaam: I would think you're aware of it, you let the enemies fly from your apartment! Fahd: I didn't want to, Sadaam! They tempted me with Kenny Rogers Roasters chicken! Sadaam: You and your chicken! Do you have any idea what's going to happen to me? Fahd: From what I understood, that George guy is sending over a bunch of people to pay you a visit. Sadaam: And do you know what happens when they come for a visit? Fahd: Haven't had too much trouble with George, seems like stand-up guy... Sadaam: THEY'RE GOING TO KILL ME!! Fahd: Oh, now you're just talking crazy, Sadaam. Tell you what, I'll talk to my people and see if I can't arrange for George and his friends to be taken care of. Sadaam: You have contacts? Fahd: Oh, I get around. Speaking of which, Mubarak and I are going out to the driving range. (Mubarak enters the apartment) Sadaam: Hello..... Mubarak. Mubarak: Hello Sadaam. Come on Fahd, let's go. (end scene) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest JangoFett4Hire Report post Posted January 2, 2003 LMFAO!!!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Kotzenjunge Report post Posted January 2, 2003 I'm quite proud of that little parody. Post of the Year for 2003 so far, sez I. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest IDrinkRatsMilk Report post Posted January 2, 2003 ha! I second post of the year so far. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest NoCalMike Report post Posted January 3, 2003 2003 post of the year....NO DOUBT. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Slapnuts00 Report post Posted January 3, 2003 That is FUNNY shit, I still need to read over those again, and email it to everyone I know Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EL DANDY~! 0 Report post Posted January 3, 2003 *checks DrTom's post again* Why yes this thread DOES kick a whole lotta ass...early TOTY candidate... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zetterberg is God 0 Report post Posted January 4, 2003 MONDAY: 0800 - Husseinfeld 0900 - Mad About Everything 0930 - Monday Night Stoning - "Are you ready for some stoning?" 1000 - Win Bin Laden's Money 1030 - Allah McBeal Sounds a lot more entertaining then the crap I currently watch Monday (ie Raw). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest imajackoff? Report post Posted January 4, 2003 Didnt Al-Jazeera sing the theme to Moonlighting? Does anybody know if Husseinfeld will ever be out on dvd?? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Maven's Eyebrows Report post Posted January 4, 2003 Apparently, several new shows will be added to the lineup this summer, including "Leave it to Burqa", "Prayer Cloak Divas" and the sitcom "Everybody Loves Ramadan". Should be great! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest The Hamburglar Report post Posted January 5, 2003 I already have Al-Jazeera. In all seriousness, they have really rather good sporting coverage. Great football(Soccer to weirdos/Americans) coverage of all leagues and they seem to like basketball too. MTA Muslim TV is where its at though. Three hour monologues on islamic texts by the leader of a persecuted outcast branch of Islam - Oh the fun to be had. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
