Guest Plushy Al Logan Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 My cousin just got a kitten, and the little thing keeps scratching me. Also, when I left my door open, it ran it, and shit under my bed, many times. I just need help and killing the little bitch (the kitten).
Guest Zack Malibu Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 OK, this has GOT to be a joke, even for you Mario... I don't think even NHB rules could protect you from posting this should it be true.
Guest Plushy Al Logan Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 I'm just getting frustrated with that damn cat! If there is an alternative, tell me, and I'll sit to think about it. Besides, I wont post pictures here on it.
Guest The Superstar Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 I was going to say the obvious "Masturbate" and then I realized you were serious.
Guest The Amazing Rando Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 well masturbation could work...you could drown it in semen how's THAT for a disturbing visual
Guest razazteca Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Just get a water bottle and spray it or go Cartman on him using a stick while yelling BAD KITTY RESPECT MY AUTHORITIA!
Guest EL BRUJ0 Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Just keep sodomizing the thing until the force of your phallic thrusts break it's lower body. Afterwards, tell everyone that the kitten was a victim of a hit and run. There you go.
Guest crandamaniac Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Make like John Tenta and pretend the cat is Damien
Guest Fook_Hing_Ho Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Throw it on the grill and laugh maniacally as it burns to a crisp
Guest WhenDanSaysJump Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Email Rob Black, he may be able to help with the whole cruel treatment of animals thing...
Guest Plushy Al Logan Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Flush it down a toilet I'am trying to think of ways that wont get me kicked out of my house. This one seems a little weird, but I think that little bitch wont fit.
Guest razazteca Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 After it "fell" in the toilet you can dry the kitty in the microwave. Urban Legends are true!
Guest The Amazing Rando Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 all you need.....is an incinerator.... "I was just taking kitty for a walk and WHOOSH...Krispy Kitty..."
Yuna_Firerose Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Just keep sodomizing the thing until the force of your phallic thrusts break it's lower body. Afterwards, tell everyone that the kitten was a victim of a hit and run. There you go. The sickest thing I've probably ever read on this board. That was just.... eww. As an owner of 16 of the furry lil critters, perhaps I could help. If it shits in your room, then get a litter box in there. Doesn't have to be anything expensive... a simple. small box with litter would do. If it's just one kitten, then it probably won't smell as much as you'd think, especially if you use Fresh Step. As for the scratching, just clip it's nails. You'll want to know how to do it before you cut, because you don't want to cut too deep. If you do, then it'll probably hate you more than it does now...which wouldn't be too good. It's a kitten, so it probably gets attached easily....I know mine do [damn things! We were SUPPOSED to not keep any of 'em!] Cats usually like to be petted on the necks, behind their ears, and on their nose. Hell, our one kitten falls asleep if you hold it just right and pet the fur on it's nose. It could either be annoying as hell, or attached to you......or at least on friendly terms. Personally, I'd prefer the latter.
Guest MrRant Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Supposedly putting tabasco sauce along say the floor where the door closes will stop them from going in there because they don't like the pepper smell.
Guest Plushy Al Logan Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 It could either be annoying as hell, or attached to you......or at least on friendly terms. Personally, I'd prefer the latter. I tried to get attatched to the fucking thing, and it still claws my fingers.
Guest EL BRUJ0 Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 The sickest thing I've probably ever read on this board. That was just.... eww. I've read sicker stuff. For instance, there's this thing called slash...
Guest snuffbox Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 this thread is cool...and by 'cool' i mean 'gay'
Yuna_Firerose Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 I tried to get attatched to the fucking thing, and it still claws my fingers. Hmm...sounds like a very young kitten. At my guess, it's afraid and not used to it's new surroundings. I've read sicker stuff. For instance, there's this thing called slash... Slash is not even in the same league as beastality, and it's two totally different things.
Guest Will Scarlet Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 As an owner of 16 of the furry lil critters, How exactly did you end up with 16 cats? That seems like a bit much.
Guest Choken One Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 16 Cats? Fucking Lame... Who wants Cats anyways? They serve no purpose... Dogs not only are cool but they will kill your enemy too...Cats are nothing but fucking pussies...
Guest MD2020 Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 16 Cats? Fucking Lame... Who wants Cats anyways? They serve no purpose... Dogs not only are cool but they will kill your enemy too...Cats are nothing but fucking pussies... Dog v. Lion--I'm picking the cat.
Guest Rob Edwards Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 having just watched Men in Black I'm going to suggest attracting an orb of some form of intergalactic significance to the cat and wait for an extraterrestrial to abduct it
Guest Sandman9000 Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 You kill the kitten, I kill you. No joke.
Guest EL BRUJ0 Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 You hear that Elvis. Touch the pussy and you die!
Guest crandamaniac Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Who'd have thought Sandman would be a cat lover?
Guest J*ingus Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Um... don't kill baby kitties. Just keep your door shut and don't touch the thing, and hope your cousin has it declawed and housebroken sometime soon.
Guest Vern Gagne Posted April 7, 2003 Report Posted April 7, 2003 Does that imply it's ok to kill adult cats?
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