Pro Wrestling Hogan:The Revival

madmatt2002 · August 7, 2003

Some old faces are gone. Some new faces. Hogan is no longer an active wrestler, he is the Commisioner. We need a new Hulk Hogan so I went with.....

The Master of the Torture Rack, Made in the USA, Lex Luger.

The Cast of Characters this time are:

Main Eventers:

Faces:

Jim Duggan

Ken Shamrock

Lex Luger

Marc Mero

Road Warrior Hawk

Road Warrior Animal

Scott Hall

Heels:

Nikita Koloff

Vader

Upper Midcarders:

Faces:

Abdullah The Butcher

Barry Windham

The Godfather

Rick Steiner

Heels:

Brian Knobbs

The Honky Tonk Man

Midcarders:

Faces:

Axl Rotten

Hack Meyers

Jim Neidhart

JT Smith

Marty Janetty

Ricky Morton

Robert Gibson

Heels:

Barry Darsow

Bill Dundee

Bobby Eaton

Gangrel

Greg Valentine

Kamala

One Man Gang

Stan Lane

Lower Midcarders:

Faces:

Doink The Clown

Heels:Barry Horowitz

Openers:

Heels:

Maxx Payne

Everyone is on open contracts.

Boas and Headlocks are no longer on TV so the first PPV will be September 20th and will be called Revival(because this is the Revival of Pro Wrestling Hogan). If we don't get a TV show in October, there will be a good chance that PWH will be switched to a weekly PPV model until we do.

Revival is coming soon. Hope everyone is glad to see this back.

Hank Kingsley · August 7, 2003

Oh my god.

This will continue to be one of the greatest things ever.

Lightning Flik · August 7, 2003

YES~! PWH IS BACK~! WOOO~!

August 7, 2003

YES, the best diary on TSM is back, but sadly there is no Nathan Jones.

madmatt2002 · August 7, 2003

In incident news:Marc Mero gets injured and Kamala has found religion. Okay Kamala now gets a new gimmick-Kamala:The Savage Priest. Or maybe not.

PWH-The Revival September 20th, 2003:

A video highlighting some great moments in the career of Hulk Hogan(in PWH that is) before the show.

92

Hulk Hogan comes out with all the title belts of Pro Wrestling Hogan. He says that tonight shall be a great night. Like the night that he bodyslammed the 25 ton Andre The Giant. Like the night he beat all 800 members of the Dungeon of Doom all by himself. Like his match with Vince McMahon at Wrestlemania XIX which was the real main event. It stole the show from those vanilla midgets, Brock Lesnar and Kurt Angle. Hogan says that all the titles are vacant on this night of revival. Hogan says that the 10 Minute Time Limit Title will be on the line when 10 top PWH superstars go at it. The Red and Yellow Tag Titles will be on the line when The Midnight Express, The Rock and Roll Express(they patched up their differences during the off time) and the Road Warriors go at it. In a three way dance for the United States Title, Kamala, Jim Duggan, and Scott Hall will go at it. and for the PWH Big Red and Yellow Title.....

The Next Hulk Hogan, Lex Luger vs Vader vs Nikita Koloff vs the Next Hulk Hogan after Lex Luger blows the big one........the newest signing of PWH........Zach Gowen. This should be a night of great matches. Now lets kick it to the Dames for the recap of the first match.

93

10 Man Battle Royal.

Match Background: This match is for the 10 Minute Time Limit title.

The Match: Uninspired brawling from Maxx Payne. Payne went for the elimination, but Gangrel held on to the ropes at the last possible second! Doink takes a sloppy snap suplex from Honky Tonk Man. Doink The Clown was eliminated by HTM. (Elimination # 1) Big kick from Gangrel staggers Payne but that's about it. Maxx Payne was eliminated by Gangrel. (Elimination # 2) Punch by Valentine, missing Steiner COMPLETELY. I'm just glad thatSteiner didn't sell it. Valentine went for the elimination, but Rick Steiner held on to the ropes at the last possible second! Honky Tonk Man hits some weak-looking punches in the corner, but Greg Valentine is able to block them and return the favor in spades. Greg Valentine got bundled out by HTM. (Elimination # 3) Godfather takes a flying neckbreaker from Marty Jannetty. Marty Jannetty strikes Godfather. Ken Shamrock gets up and gives a Belly to belly suplex to Shamrock. One Man Gang got bundled out by Shamrock. (Elimination # 4) Godfather strikes Gangrel with a hard blow. Gangrel was eliminated by Godfather. (Elimination # 5) Big forearm by HTM draws laughter from the crowd because it was THAT bad. Marty Jannetty got eliminated by HTM. (Elimination # 6) Rick Steiner strikes Honky Tonk Man. Steiner threw Honky Tonk Man all the way over the top rope to the floor. No question about that one. (Elimination # 7) Shamrock receives some punishment by Rick Steiner but with that horrid offense, we're the only ones truly being punished. Steiner threw Ken Shamrock all the way over the top rope to the floor. No question about that one. (Elimination # 8) Rick Steiner hits Godfather. Rick Steiner with a badly-executed spinning neckbreaker on Godfather. One more performed that badly and this match will end on a bad note, if you get my drift. Rick Steiner stuns Godfather. Steiner Bulldog, right on the money! Godfather was eliminated by Steiner.

My Opinion: -*. That's right. NEGATIVE ONE STAR. That's what you get for this CRAP.

Overall:49

Crowd Reaction:51

Match Quality:46

The Dames pulls no punches breaking out the negative stars in the first match. Gangrel and Godfather are both losing over from their weak gimmicks. Okay whatever.

Jim Duggan and Scott Hall are chilling backstage drinking milk because Scott Hall is a recovered alcoholic.

79

Midnight Express vs Road Warriors vs Rock N Roll Express.

Match Background: This will be an elimination bout. Eaton is making his debut at this show. Sweet Stan is making his debut at this show. Animal is making his debut at this show. Hawk is making his debut at this show. Morton is making his debut at this show. Gibson is making his debut at this show. Midnight Express are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. Road Warriors are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. Rock N Roll Express are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. This match is for the Red and Yellow Tag titles.

The Match: BORING ass brawling from Hawk. Punch by Hawk, missing Eaton COMPLETELY. I'm just glad thatEaton didn't sell it. Tag to Robert Gibson. Eaton walks into a spinning heel kick which almost causes a decapitation! Covers for a quick two count. Eaton reverses a waistlock. Eaton tags out to Stan Lane. Stan Lane scoops up Gibson. Eaton bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Tag between Robert Gibson and Ricky Morton. Morton hits a quick kick on Sweet Stan. Back heel kick from Morton on Sweet Stan. Sweet Stan tags out to Road Warrior Animal. Morton hits an arm drag on Animal, follows it up with about 3 more and locks in an armbar for good measure. Morton goes for a splash but Animal puts the knees up. Side suplex from Animal. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. ONE...TWO...THREE. Animal defeats Morton. Big clothesline from Sweet Stan. Sweet Stan DDTs Road Warrior Animal. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Tag between Stan Lane and Bobby Eaton. Midnight Express whip Animal into the ropes and hit a double back elbow. Hooks the leg for a two count. Animal counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Tag between Road Warrior Animal and Road Warrior Hawk. Road Warrior Hawk connects with a crappy looking standing spinebuster. Does everyone use that move these days? BIG clothesline from Hawk. 'BIG' because it missed by a mile! Tag between Road Warrior Hawk and Road Warrior Animal. Bobby Eaton is in trouble. Powerbomb!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

My Opinion: When I give out 3/4*, it means that I'm being REALLY nice about it.

Overall:65

Crowd Reaction:68

Match Quality:60

The Road Warriors are the new Tag Team Champions. These two hosses are hot young talent. They should make great Tag Team Champions.

Jim Duggan vs Kamala vs Scott Hall.

Match Background: This will be a cage bout. Duggan is making his debut at this show. Kamala is making his debut at this show. Hall is making his debut at this show. This match is for the United States title.

The Match: Uninspiring brawling from Jim Duggan. Check them brawlin' stats, boy. Scott Hall launches Duggan into the cage wall. Kamala reverses a Scott Hall hammerlock. Kamala hits a bulldog off the ropes. Kamala hits a sloppy ass bulldog off the ropes. Kamala climbs the cage, but gets pulled down by Duggan! Scott Hall scores with a poor standing spinebuster. Kamala reverses a waistlock. Kamala throws Hall into the cage. Duggan DDTs Kamala. Jim Duggan climbs the cage and escapes for the win!

My Opinion: -*. That's right. NEGATIVE ONE STAR. That's what you get for this CRAP.

Overall:62

Crowd Reaction:70

Match Quality:45

Kamala climbing the cage would scare anybody. Duggan is the new United States Champion, like I could put the belt on anyone else. They wouldn't deserve it.

Zach Gowan vs Lex Luger vs Vader vs Nikita Koloff.

Match Background: This will be an elimination bout. Gowan is making his debut at this show. Luger is making his debut at this show. Vader is making his debut at this show. Koloff is making his debut at this show. This match is for the Big Red and Yellow title.

The Match: Weak kick from Koloff. I am unpleased. Nikita Koloff strikes Zach Gowan. Covers for a quick two count. Koloff drops an elbow...but Zach Gowan moves out of the way. Tag between Zach Gowan and Lex Luger. Big forearm by Luger draws laughter from the crowd because it was THAT bad. Luger whips Koloff into the turnbuckles...and the ref is crushed! Luger DDTs Nikita Koloff. Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Koloff takes a couple of weak clotheslines. Nikita Koloff avoids a Lex Luger avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Tag between Nikita Koloff and Vader. Massive backbreaker on Luger and I get happy flashbacks to Bret Hart's Five Moves of DOOM. Running knee lift from Vader. Lex Luger reverses a hip toss. A powerslam so weak, my grandmother could have performed it, is actually pulled off by Luger on Vader. Lex Luger knocks Vader down to the canvas with a clothesline. Cover gets three for Lex Luger, Vader got pinned. Lex Luger gets hip tossed by Gowan. Luger walks into a spinning heel kick which almost causes a decapitation! Covers for a quick two count. Back heel kick from Gowan on Luger but it misses by miles. Pin, but Luger is out just before the three count. Luger pushes out of a Zach Gowan hold. Lex Luger knocks Gowan down to the canvas with a clothesline. Tag between Lex Luger and Nikita Koloff. Koloff DDTs Zach Gowan. The ref gets into position, administers the three count, and it's over. Nikita Koloff pins Gowan. BORING ass brawling from Koloff. Lex Luger fights out of a grapple. Powerslam from Lex Luger on Koloff. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Lex Luger misses a clothesline. Nikita Koloff punches away at Lex Luger. Nikita Koloff floors Luger near the ropes and makes the pin. Koloff is using the ropes for leverage! The referee hasn't seen it: 1....2....3!!

My Opinion: DUD. That's about all I can say without getting into obsenities.

Overall:64

Crowd Reaction:71

Match Quality:49

So Luger pins Vader with a clothesline, Koloff pins Gowen with a DDT, and Koloff pins Luger after flooring him and putting his feet on the ropes. We are getting to the 80s slowly but surely. The 1880s that is when that new deadly move, the clothesline, was feared throughout the land. Koloff is the Big Red and Yellow Champion. I am sure he would uphold the honor of past champions such as Nathan Jones and Giant Gonzales. Or who says I won't have him job the title to Luger if we get a TV show on the first one to pop a rating.

Overall:65

0.30 Buyrate for Revival.

August 7, 2003

When Jones gets fire by WWE you better sign him.

madmatt2002 · August 8, 2003

In the news, Scott Hall checked into rehab for personal problems. Yes I know, I am as shocked as you are. Rumors that someone spiked the milk that Hall was drinking at the PPV with booze. He was recovering well too.

Abdullah the Butcher has found religion.

Okay you want distressful. Hulk Hogan was STOLEN underneath my nose by that no good rotten son of a bitch Vince McMahon. He is still the owner of this federation. Vince McMahon got his fed back in the downtime. I forgot to put him under an unsackable agreement by the looks of it.

The lovely stuff continues as Marty Janetty admits he has a drug problem. In other news the grass is green. I ignore.

TNT has rejected our deal for the a TV Deal.

Lovely, just lovely. The next event is Old School Experience. We will have an update on the management situation of Pro Wrestling Hogan. It is royally fucked six ways from Sunday. Rumors that the board of directors will have a new commisioner/figurehead owner named.

August 8, 2003

Randy Savage (Macho Madness Wrestling), obviously, or Terry Funk

madmatt2002 · August 8, 2003

Talk about your problems with theft:

Ken Shamrock signs a written contract with Golden Canvas Grappling behind my back.

Scott Hall signs a written deal with NWA TNA.

GCG stole Sting(who was supposed to be revealed as the new owner by the way) right out from underneath my nose.

TNA also signed Terry Funk(who I signed at the beginning of the month because I wanted to start a Hardcore Division. Hardcore meaning they would go to the top rope instead of the second rope for high risk moves)

God I hate this game sometimes-Bob Backlund, who was supposed to be the new owner broke his arm and will be out for two months. Okay I signed two possible new owners to written contracts.

Axl Rotten is becoming difficult to deal with. SCREW IT. I have had enough people being stolen/checked into rehab/injured/whatever.

In a bit of interesting news, Sable has signed with XPW. I will leave it at that however.

Marty Jannetty is becoming difficult to deal with. Ignore.

and I must go to look for my napkin that has the Old School Experience match listings. Off the top of my head:New Owner. Koloff vs Luger in a non-title match(I wonder who is going to win that one since it is non title), titles get defended. Dames dishes out negative stars. Honky Tonk Man vs Marty Janetty in the dark segment.

August 8, 2003

Randy Savage is right there

Zack Malibu · August 8, 2003

Roddy Piper or Tank Abbott for new figurehead! Just remember to turn Abbott into a manager/non-wrestler. Or you could fire Neidhart and bring him back as owner, thus making it PRO WRESTLING ANVIL~!

madmatt2002 · August 8, 2003

Old School Experience-October 22nd, 2003:

Honky Tonk Man vs Marty Jannetty.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Honky Tonk Man slams Jannetty down. Jannetty takes a snap suplex from Honky Tonk Man. Needs a little more 'umph' though. Jannetty takes a sloppy snap suplex from Honky Tonk Man. Honky Tonk Man with a sloppy back bodydrop on Jannetty. We almost had another Benoit/Sabu situation there. Marty Jannetty comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Jannetty hits a dropkick on Honky Tonk Man. Actually, it barely touched! Marty Jannetty uses a running dropkick into the corner. That was just...ugh. There's a two count on the pin. Jannetty drops an elbow...but Honky Tonk Man moves out of the way. Honky Tonk Man hits a shaky delayed suplex on Jannetty. If I were Jannetty, I'd be too hesistant to let someone like that pick me up over their head. There's a two count on the pin. HTM hits a badly done swinging DDT on Marty Jannetty. I can do better. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Jannetty blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Jannetty hits a back kick, doubling HTMover. Honky Tonk Man avoids a Marty Jannetty avalanche by getting out of the damn way! HTM suplexes Jannetty to the canvas and floats over. The referee tries to separate the two grapplers...and gets knocked over and trampled on as they brawl! That's enough, the referee calls for the bell - double DQ! Marty Jannetty offers a handshake to HTM...and he accepts it! No! Honky Tonk Man levels Jannetty with a cheap shot right hand! Honky Tonk Man spins Jannetty around. Honky Tonk Man hits the Shake, Rattle and Roll! Marty Jannetty has been floored after the match.

My Opinion: A DUD here would have actually been generous! -*

Overall:55

Crowd Reaction:59

Match Quality:48

We are into the first match and already we are into the negative stars. They fight to a double DQ and Marty Janetty wants a handshake but Honky Tonk Man cheapshots him and lays him out. Marty Jannetty was too stoned to realize that you don't shake the Honky Tonk Man's hands.

Music kicks up and out comes the new owner.....The Warrior. Wearing a three piece suit with facepaint. Warrior talks for about 20 minutes but out comes Randy Savage in a three piece suit with a sequined cowboy hat. Savage says that he was made the new owner by the board of directors. Warrior said he was. They argue for about three hours before they decide that there is only one way to settle this. They will have a match and whomever is the last man standing will be the new owner. Warrior vs Savage:Last Man Standing for the Ownership of Not Pro Wrestling Hogan.

64

Abdullah The Butcher vs Greg Valentine vs Barry Darsow.

Match Background: This will be a hardcore bout. Abdullah is making his debut at this show. Darsow is making his debut at this show. This match is for the Hardcore title.

The Match: Valentine receives some punishment by Barry Darsow but with that horrid offense, we're the only ones truly being punished. Barry Darsow strikes Abdullah The Butcher. Darsow charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Face-first suplex onto a trash can by Valentine! Abdullah The Butcher DDTs Valentine, but it just looked terrible. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Running clothesline from Barry Darsow was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Darsow drops an elbow...but Abdullah The Butcher moves out of the way. Greg Valentine scoops up Darsow. Abdullah bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Greg Valentine knocks Darsow down to the canvas with a clothesline. Abdullah The Butcher uses a big bag of popcorn to floor Valentine. I wonder if butter adds impact. Valentine pushes out of a Abdullah The Butcher hold. Greg Valentine with a sloppy back bodydrop on Darsow. We almost had another Benoit/Sabu situation there. Greg Valentine has Barry Darsow down on the canvas. Figure Four Leglock!!! Barry Darsow taps out!

My Opinion: A DUD here would have actually been generous! -*

Overall:49

Crowd Reaction:48

Match Quality:51

Nothing says Hardcore quite like Greg "The Hammer" Valentine let me tell you. Barry Darsow debuted his split personality gimmick tonight. He was dressed up like Blacktop Bully in this match.

Rick Steiner vs Zach Gowan.

Match Background: This match is for the 10 Minute Time Limit title. Rick Steiner has been 10 Minute Time Limit champion since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Weak bodyslam by Steiner. Rick Steiner turns Gowan inside-out with a clothesline. Reminds me of Willow's 'Bored Now' skin ripping finisher. Inside joke, don't worry about it. Flapjack from Steiner on Gowan. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Running clothesline from Rick Steiner was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Covers for a quick two count. Gowan counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Flying elbow from Zach Gowan, grazing the target slightly. Back heel kick from Gowan on Steiner but it misses by miles. Steiner blocks a punch. Rick Steiner hits a sloppy double axe handle off the top. Zach Gowan is stunned as Steiner heads to the top rope. Here it comes - Steiner Bulldog, forget about it. 1....2...3! Rick Steiner gives a murderous look toward Zach Gowan...and attacks! Gowan gets dropped to the canvas, then battered with a barrage of rights and lefts. Steiner leaves the ring having left Gowan down and out.

My Opinion: -*. That's right. NEGATIVE ONE STAR. That's what you get for this CRAP.

Overall:52

Crowd Reaction:55

Match Quality:48

Got to love Rick Steiner. He stiffs Gowan to welcome him to Not Pro Wrestling Hogan.

Road Warriors vs Bill Dundee and JT Smith.

Match Background: Dundee is making his debut at this show. JT is making his debut at this show. Road Warriors are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. Animal knows Hawk from their battles for World Japan in Japan. This match is for the Red and Yellow Tag titles. Road Warriors have been Red and Yellow Tag champions since 20 September 2003.

The Match: BORING ass brawling from Hawk. Road Warrior Hawk strikes JT Smith. Road Warrior Hawk knocks JT down to the canvas with a clothesline. JT tags out to Bill Dundee. Bill Dundee punches away at Road Warrior Hawk only to get the tides turned quickly. Hawk counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Weak kick from Hawk. I am unpleased. Hawk tags out to Road Warrior Animal. Road Warriors whip Dundee into the ropes and hit a double back elbow. Messed up bodyslam by Animal almost kills Dundee. Sloppy discus punch from Road Warrior Animal barely connects on Dundee. Tag to Road Warrior Hawk. Road Warriors have Bill Dundee to themselves. Doomsday Device! 1....2....3! It's over.

My Opinion: Bad match which brought absolutely nothing to the table and was a waste of time. DUD.

Overall:58

Crowd Reaction:62

Match Quality:49

Just a nice squash to get the Road Warriors(who sell half of my merchadise) on the show. Match of the night so far.

Maxx Payne vs Jim Duggan.

Match Background: This match is for the United States title. Jim Duggan has been United States champion since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Jim Duggan hits a bulldog off the ropes. Jim Duggan moves in for the kill. Running Clothesline!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

My Opinion: -*. Somehow, you actually took AWAY from any enjoyment I could have had watching this.

Overall:46

Crowd Reaction:50

Match Quality:40

We are back in the negative one star groove. Duggan squashes Maxx Payne like Duggan was Goldberg and Payne was Jerry Flynn.

Nikita Koloff vs Lex Luger.

Match Background: Nikita Koloff is the reigning Big Red and Yellow champion, and has been since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Lex Luger hits a bulldog off the ropes. Lex Luger scores with a shitty standing spinebuster. Sloppy discus punch from Lex Luger barely connects on Koloff. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Lex Luger punches away at Nikita Koloff. There's a two count on the pin. Nikita Koloff avoids a Lex Luger avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Nikita Koloff hits a weak elbow on Lex Luger. Messed up bodyslam by Koloff almost kills Luger. Lex Luger elbows Nikita Koloff in the face to break a hammerlock. Messed up bodyslam by Luger almost kills Koloff. Lex Luger misses a clothesline...and takes out the referee accidentally! Nikita Koloff slams Luger, who rolls onto his stomach. What is Lex Luger doing? Nikita Koloff picks him up and signals for a powerbomb. He raises Luger up...but then throws him off. Nikita Koloff saw that Luger had a chain and was ready to hit him with it. A kick to the gut stuns Luger, and the chain gets taken by Koloff, who wraps it around his fist. Knock-out punch! Lex Luger is out cold, KOed by his own weapon! The referee gets up to see the pinfall - 1....2....3! Another referee comes running down the aisle, and points out to the first official that Nikita Koloff used a steel chain to get this victory. The referee reverses the decision! Nikita Koloff has been disqualified! Koloff grabs the referee, then nails him with a right hand! Dozens of people hit the ring to stop any further incident.

My Opinion: -*. That's right. NEGATIVE ONE STAR. That's what you get for this CRAP.

Overall:62

Crowd Reaction:72

Match Quality:42

Luger won via a Dusty Finish. Koloff decks the referee. (why didn't you put Luger over clean if it was non title). That would be logical.

The Warrior vs Randy Savage.

Match Background: This will be a last man standing bout. Warrior is making his debut at this show. Savage is making his debut at this show.

The Match: The Warrior hits some weak-looking punches in the corner, but Randy Savage is able to block them and return the favor in spades. Warrior hits Savage with a plastic dinosaur! The Warrior punches away at Randy Savage. The Warrior punches away at Randy Savage. Savage powers out of a headlock. Randy Savage scoop slams Warrior onto and through a table. Big clothesline from Savage. The referee gets to a five count....and The Warrior gets back up. Warrior reverses a Randy Savage hammerlock. Messed up bodyslam by Warrior almost kills Savage. The referee counts: 2....3...4....but Savage stands up. Warrior DDTs Randy Savage. The referee gets to a seven count....and Randy Savage gets back up. Savage kicks The Warrior in the gut to reverse the momentum. Savage strikes away at The Warrior, not doing much damage at all. Savage walks into a drop toe hold. The Warrior hits a BIG clothesline for two! The Warrior floors Randy Savage. Here it comes - Gorilla Press and Splash, right on the money. The referee counts to 10, this match is over! Randy Savage has a temper tantrum, kicking the ropes and punching the turnbuckles.

My Opinion: DUD. That's about all I can say without getting into obsenities.

Overall:65

Crowd Reaction:74

Match Quality:45

The Warrior is the NEW Owner of Not Pro Wrestling Hogan. Oh excuse me I have been handed a memo by Mr. Warrior. Destrucity Death Wrestling is our new name. Lovely.

Overall:55

0.30 Buyrate to Old School Experience.

Lightning Flik · August 8, 2003

Nice recover my friend...

And damn that just sucks with all the losses you've had to endure.

Good show though, as always.

madmatt2002 · August 8, 2003

Some good news for once....we have a TV Show.

Destrucity Death Wrestling will be on every Wednesday Morning in the graveyard slot from 12:00 AM to 12:30 AM on TNT. Join Mean Gene Okerlund and The Honky Tonk Man for some late DDW action.

Greg Valentine has become a non wrestler so I strip him of the Hardcore Title.

The Next PPV will be Viva La Warrior on Thanksgiving Eve.

Zack Malibu · August 8, 2003

Turn Valentine into a heel foil authority figure for DA WOWREEAH~!

Put the Hardcore Title on Doink The Clown. Feud him with Barry Horowitz in all sorts of stipulation matches, like the Hardcore Piefight or Electrified Joy Buzzers Cage Match.

madmatt2002 · August 8, 2003

Power and Paint for November 5th 2003:

Mr. Warrior is here and he is going to make some matches. Greg Valentine has been stripped of the Hardcore Title and the two three way hardcore matches will happen tonight where the winners facing for the Hardcore Title next week. Also Mr. Warrior is not too pleased with Macho Man defying his authority so Warrior is demoting Savage to a referee and he will ref the main event tonight between Barry Windham and Lex Luger and Nikita Koloff and the Man They Call Vader. Mr. Warrior has spoken.

50

Mr Warrior's commisioner gimmick got a negative response and he lost overness from this segment. Damn.

Axl Rotten vs Bill Dundee vs Marty Jannetty.

Match Background: This will be a hardcore bout. Axl is making his debut at this show. He is a regular with JAPW.

The Match: Marty Jannetty strikes Dundee. Axl Rotten smashes a Playstation console over the head of Jannetty. Should have used an X-Box, they're much bigger. Bill Dundee fights out of a grapple. Dundee hits a stump piledriver on Axl Rotten. Bill Dundee DDTs Jannetty in a move that is so poorly executed, you can actually see that Marty Jannetty's head didn't touch the mat at all. Covers for a quick two count. Axl DDTs Bill Dundee. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Dundee reverses a Axl Rotten hammerlock. Bill Dundee smashes a Playstation console over the head of Axl. Should have used an X-Box, they're much bigger. Swan dive headbutt from Jannetty but without much elevation on the move. Bill Dundee can barely stand. Rocker Dropper!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

My Opinion: Bad match which brought absolutely nothing to the table and was a waste of time. DUD.

Overall:51

Crowd Reaction:50

Match Quality:52

Marty Jannetty wins the first qualifying match for the Hardcore Title Match next week. Marty Jannetty did a swandive headbutt. He was so stoned, he thought he was Chris Benoit for a minute.

Brian Knobbs vs Gangrel vs Barry Horowitz.

Match Background: This will be a hardcore bout. Knobbs is making his debut at this show. Horowitz is making his debut at this show.

The Match: Wack kick from Gangrel. Uninspired brawling from Gangrel. Brian Knobbs fights out of a grapple. Frying pan shot by Knobbs. Barry Horowitz hits a bulldog off the ropes. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Running clothesline from Gangrel was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Horowitz blocks a kick from Gangrel. Knobbs \ Horowitz hook up Gangrel, then hit a double suplex. Brian Knobbs knocks Gangrel down to the canvas with a clothesline. Frying pan shot by Horowitz. Horowitz charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Big forearm by Knobbs draws laughter from the crowd because it was THAT bad. Gangrel can barely stand. Here it comes - DDT. 1....2...3, it's finished.

My Opinion: A DUD here would have actually been generous! -*

Overall:46

Crowd Reaction:47

Match Quality:46

Brian Knobbs will face Marty Jannetty next week for the Hardcore Title. Knobbs has held the Hardcore Title in WCW so he has experience in the Hardcore Style of wrestling.

Jim Neidhart says he will be in the house next week with his new interview segment:The Anvil Toss.

53

Lex Luger and Barry Windham vs Vader and Nikita Koloff.

Match Background: This will be a special guest referee bout. Windham is making his debut at this show. Randy Savage will be the referee for this match. Nikita Koloff is the reigning Big Red and Yellow champion, and has been since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Boring brawling from Lex Luger is the cure for insomnia. Messed up bodyslam by Luger almost kills Vader. Tag to Barry Windham. Windham slams Vader down. Vader is sure in trouble now. There's a two count on the pin. Side suplex from Windham. Tag to Lex Luger. Windham \ Luger whip Vader into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Vader flips out of a Lex Luger bodyslam attempt. Tag between Vader and Nikita Koloff. Nikita Koloff strikes Lex Luger. Messed up bodyslam by Koloff almost kills Luger. Tag between Nikita Koloff and Vader. Koloff \ Vader whip Luger into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Rude Awakening neckbreaker on Lex Luger by Vader. Remember when that was a legit finish? Big piledriver on Luger. Tag between Vader and Nikita Koloff. Nikita Koloff hits a BIG clothesline for two! Luger reverses a waistlock. Tag to Barry Windham. Big clothesline from Windham. Barry Windham scores with a quick roll up. 1.2.3! Randy Savage made a lightning fast three count, Nikita Koloff had no chance to kick out. Nikita Koloff has grabbed a chair from outside, and slides back into the ring. Randy Savage turns around, and gets floored and bust open with a brutal chair shot! Nikita Koloff has floored Randy Savage with a chair and left his referee's shirt stained with blood.

My Opinion: A DUD here would have actually been generous! -*

Overall:61

Crowd Reaction:70

Match Quality:42

Barry Windham pins the champion so he should get a title shot at Viva La Warrior right. WRONG. Luger will get the title shot because I am trying to make him the next....that guy that wears Red and Yellow. Randy Savage also screwed up Mr Warrior's plans so RETRIBUTION is in the cards next week. Macho is not pleased being busted down to a referee by the Duke of Destrucity.

Overall:47

0.80 Rating for Power and Paint.

Next Week on Power and Paint:Marty Jannetty vs Brian Knobbs for the Hardcore Title and the United States Champion Jim Duggan will be on the Anvil Toss. Tune in.

madmatt2002 · August 9, 2003

Power and Paint for 11/12/03:

Mr. Warrior is in his office. Viva La Warrior is only TWO weeks away so he needs a main event. He decides that Barry Windham, Lex Luger, and the Man They Call Vader will fight for the Number One Contendership for the Big Red and Yellow Title. Winner faces Koloff at the PPV. Warrior also says he has demoted the Macho Man to a concession stands worker for his little outburst during the main event last week.

51

Brian Knobbs vs Marty Jannetty.

Match Background: This will be a hardcore bout. This match is for the Hardcore title.

The Match: Brian Knobbs hits some weak-looking punches in the corner, but Marty Jannetty is able to block them and return the favor in spades. Frying pan shot by Knobbs. Brian Knobbs hits some weak-looking punches in the corner, but Marty Jannetty is able to block them and return the favor in spades. There's a two count on the pin. Brian Knobbs strikes Marty Jannetty. Hooks the leg for a two count. Jannetty counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Forearm to the face from Jannetty on Knobbs. Hooks the leg for a two count. Badly executed second rope splash by Jannetty. Marty Jannetty gets taken down out of nowhere! Sloppy discus punch from Brian Knobbs barely connects on Jannetty. Marty Jannetty is in trouble. Powerslam!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!! Marty Jannetty goes nuts, attacking the referee! DDT! The referee is out!

My Opinion: Bad match which brought absolutely nothing to the table and was a waste of time. DUD.

Overall:54

Crowd Reaction:56

Match Quality:52

Brian Knobbs is the NEW DDW Hardcore Champion. I have word that a rematch will take place in two weeks at Viva La Warrior.

Jim Neidhart is with Jim Duggan on the Anvil Toss. The rumors of Duggan retiring are NOT true. Duggan says that he will defend that title through thick and thin. Out comes Kamala to dispute this. He knocks Duggan down, splashes him, and rubs his nipples into Duggan's chest. Okay, Kamala doesn't actually splash him.

66

Randy Savage is selling merchadise. Nearly half of it is foam Road Warrior shoulder pads. A fan is giving him a hard time so he slams the fan headfirst into the popcorn machine and smashes a foam road warrior shoulder pad over his face before hitting an elbowdrop off of the counter. Oh Yeah.

83

Barry Windham vs Lex Luger vs Vader.

Match Background: This will be a triangle bout.

The Match: Barry Windham hits a right hand on Lex Luger and follows it up with a couple more. Vader receives some punishment by Barry Windham but with that horrid offense, we're the only ones truly being punished. Windham drops an elbow...but Lex Luger moves out of the way. A powerslam so weak, my grandmother could have performed it, is actually pulled off by Luger on Windham. Full nelson slam on Luger. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Barry Windham with a badly-executed spinning neckbreaker on Vader. One more performed that badly and this match will end on a bad note, if you get my drift. Vader avoids a Barry Windham avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Luger \ Vader whip Windham into the ropes and hit a double back elbow. Lex Luger connects with a crappy looking standing spinebuster. Does everyone use that move these days? Trying to channel the spirit of Misawa, Vader ends up chanelling Lex Luger instead and nails a running forearm to the face, minus the steel plate, of course. Lex Luger fights out of a grapple. Lex Luger strikes Barry Windham. Lex Luger has Barry Windham down on the canvas. Torture Rack!!! Barry Windham taps out!

My Opinion: One SOLE bright spot in this match keeps it from going into DUD territory. 1/4*.

Overall:66

Crowd Reaction:71

Match Quality:55

In an outcome that NO ONE saw coming, Lex Luger will face Nikita Koloff for the Big Red and Yellow Title at Viva La Warrior. That is your main event in TWO weeks. Next week we will throw together some matches. Be there and don't be there.

Overall:57

0.86 Rating for Power and Paint.

madmatt2002 · August 9, 2003

Power and Paint for 11/19/03:

Mr. Warrior is on the Anvil toss with Jim Neidhart. Mr. Warrior has some matches to make for the PPV. We know about Nikita Koloff defending the Big Red and Yellow Title against Made In the USA, Lex Luger. Warrior states that this is Luger's LAST chance to win the title, so no pressure Lex. Also Brian Knobbs defend the Hardcore Title against Marty Jannetty in a return match from last week. Mr. Warrior also states that Jim Duggan will defend his United States Title against Kamala. Mr. Warrior states that the Road Warriors will defend the Tag Team Titles against the winners of the Number One Contenders Four Corners Tag Team Match. Mr. Warrior says that Honky Tonk Man will face Rick Steiner for the 10 Minute Time Limit Title. HTM doesn't sound too pleased with this because Rick Steiner will stiff you. Mr. Warrior says if Randy Savage wants to wrestle he can....against Vader in a Cage Match. If Savage beats Vader, Warrior will let him wrestle full time. Mr. Warrior also has Abdullah the Butcher face Zach Gowan, purely for his own amusement. Also Redneck Thunder Barry Windham will face Maxx Payne. Thats it pretty much it.

63

Doink The Clown and Marc Mero vs Bill Dundee and JT Smith vs Rock N Roll Express vs Midnight Express.

Match Background: This will be an elimination bout. Mero is making his debut at this show. Rock N Roll Express are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. Midnight Express are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion.

The Match: Bill Dundee punches away at Ricky Morton only to get the tides turned quickly. Bill Dundee hits a BIG clothesline for two! Tag between Bill Dundee and JT Smith. JT strikes away at Ricky Morton, not doing much damage at all. Hooks the leg for a two count. JT walks into a drop toe hold. Tag to Stan Lane. Big kick from Sweet Stan staggers JT but that's about it. Powerslam from Stan Lane on JT. Tag to Bobby Eaton. Stan Lane scoops up JT. Eaton bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Covers for a quick two count. JT Smith powers out of a Bobby Eaton headlock. Bobby Eaton takes a right hand to the temple from JT. I bet those hurt more than Sgt. Slaughter's Noogies. Tag to Marc Mero. Second rope flying axe handle, Eaton goes down. One day, Mero might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Covers for a quick two count. Tag between Bobby Eaton and JT Smith. Mero receives some punishment by JT Smith but with that horrid offense, we're the only ones truly being punished. JT Smith misses a clothesline. SUPER frankensteiner on JT, who hit hard and is loopy as a result. The ref gets into position, administers the three count, and it's over. Marc Mero pins JT. Mero takes a kick to the chest, and staggers back. A blind charge only gets an even HARDER kick. Slingshot clothesline by Gibson, who almost messed it up by slipping on the ropes. Pin, but Mero is out just before the three count. Tag between Robert Gibson and Stan Lane. Big kick from Sweet Stan staggers Mero but that's about it. Sweet Stan tags out to Ricky Morton. Back heel kick from Morton on Mero. Ricky Morton with an enziguri! HBK isn't moving...uh oh. Oh, sorry, I had a flashback to the last time I got fooled. ONE...TWO...THREE. Morton defeats Mero. Chin crusher by Bobby Eaton, the execution wasn't great though. I'd like to see a good Chin Crusher, that just sounds devastating. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Eaton suplexes Morton to the canvas and floats over. Eaton goes for a splash but Morton puts the knees up. Face crusher from Morton on Eaton sets up for an elbowdrop. There's a two count on the pin. Tag to Robert Gibson. Rock N Roll Express whip Eaton into the corner. Ricky Morton whips Robert Gibson in for a hard clothesline to follow-up. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Gibson hits a soaring kick on Eaton. Eaton blocks a kick from Robert Gibson. Tag between Bobby Eaton and Stan Lane. Stan Lane DDTs Gibson, but it just looked terrible. Flapjack from Sweet Stan on Gibson. Ricky Morton can barely stand. Here it comes - Martial Arts Kick. 1....2...3, it's finished.

My Opinion: I'll give a 3/4 star rating, but only if you promise to improve as a booker.

Overall:57

Crowd Reaction:49

Match Quality:65

The Express gets the honours of facing merchandise top salers one and two, Hawk and Animal, the Road Warriors.

Abdullah The Butcher and Brian Knobbs vs Marty Jannetty and Zach Gowan.

Match Background: Brian Knobbs is the reigning Hardcore champion, and has been since 12 November 2003.

The Match: A powerslam so weak, my grandmother could have performed it, is actually pulled off by Knobbs on Jannetty. Powerslam from Brian Knobbs on Jannetty. Tag to Abdullah The Butcher. Abdullah The Butcher hits a right hand on Marty Jannetty. There's a two count on the pin. Abdullah The Butcher scores with a crappy looking standing spinebuster. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. Tag between Abdullah The Butcher and Brian Knobbs. Abdullah \ Knobbs hook up Jannetty, then hit a double suplex. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Jannetty counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Tag to Zach Gowan. Gowan hits a dropkick on Brian Knobbs. Actually, it barely touched! Back heel kick from Gowan on Knobbs but it misses by miles. Gowan tags out to Marty Jannetty. Gowan \ Jannetty whip Knobbs into the ropes and hit a double clothesline. Jannetty hits a dropkick on Brian Knobbs. Actually, it barely touched! Marty Jannetty hits a shitty missile dropkick on Knobbs. Jannetty tags out to Zach Gowan. Gowan hits an arm drag on Knobbs, follows it up with about 3 more and locks in an armbar for good measure. Knobbs blocks a punch. Tag to Abdullah The Butcher. Abdullah The Butcher DDTs Gowan, but it just looked terrible. Abdullah The Butcher moves in for the kill. Sudanese Elbow Drop!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

My Opinion: One SOLE bright spot in this match keeps it from going into DUD territory. 1/4*.

Overall:57

Crowd Reaction:58

Match Quality:58

Abdullah is back for a tour of AJPW and looking pretty good. He will face Gowan in singles action at the PPV.

Lex Luger and Barry Windham bond in the lockeroom.

63

Lex Luger and Barry Windham vs Nikita Koloff and Maxx Payne.

Match Background: Nikita Koloff is the reigning Big Red and Yellow champion, and has been since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Barry Windham with a badly-executed spinning neckbreaker on Koloff. One more performed that badly and this match will end on a bad note, if you get my drift. Barry Windham hits an ugly looking bulldog off the ropes. Tag to Lex Luger. Boring brawling from Lex Luger is the cure for insomnia. Hooks the leg for a two count. Lex Luger scores with a shitty standing spinebuster. Tag between Lex Luger and Barry Windham. Luger \ Windham whip Koloff into the corner. Lex Luger whips Barry Windham in for a hard clothesline to follow-up. Pin, but Koloff is out just before the three count. Nikita Koloff reverses a hip toss. Tag between Nikita Koloff and Maxx Payne. Big kick from Payne staggers Windham but that's about it. Maxx Payne hits an ugly looking bulldog off the ropes. Tag between Maxx Payne and Nikita Koloff. Payne \ Koloff whip Windham into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Weak slam from Koloff sets Windham for something, but if it was as weak as that slam, then Windham has no worries. BIG clothesline from Koloff. 'BIG' because it missed by a mile! Tag between Nikita Koloff and Maxx Payne. Maxx Payne hits a right hand on Barry Windham. Windham counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Tag to Lex Luger. Lex Luger DDTs Payne in a move that is so poorly executed, you can actually see that Maxx Payne's head didn't touch the mat at all. Maxx Payne gets knocked to the ground by Luger. Torture Rack!!! Maxx Payne taps out!

My Opinion: -*. That's right. NEGATIVE ONE STAR. That's what you get for this CRAP.

Overall:50

Crowd Reaction:56

Match Quality:39

Luger makes Maxx Payne submit. Can he do the same thing next Wednesday to Nikita Koloff. Tune...In....to...Viva....La....Warrior....to find out.

Overall:50

Crowd Reaction:56

Match Quality:39

Overall:50

0.80 Rating for Power and Paint.

After some shrewd negotiation with TNT, I have gotten Power and Paint moved up to late evening slight. That's right. One extra segment of goodness.

Now without further ado, the Viva La Warrior card:

Forgone Conclusion Match for the Big Red and Yellow Title:

Lex Luger vs Nikita Koloff©

Randy Savage gets killed Steel Cage Match:

Randy Savage vs Vader

United States Title:

Jim Duggan© vs Kamala

Hardcore Title Nastyville Death Match:

Brian Knobbs© vs Marty Jannetty.

Tag Team Title Match:

The Road Warriors© vs the Midnight Express

10 Minute Time Limit Title Match:

Honky Tonk Man vs Rick Steiner©

Purely For Mr. Warrior's amusement:

Zack Gowan vs Abdullah the Butcher

Opening of Match of Mild Doom:

Maxx Payne vs "Redneck Thunder" Barry Windham.

madmatt2002 · August 10, 2003

DDW Viva La Warrior-November 23rd, 2003:

Maxx Payne vs Barry Windham.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Maxx Payne hits a right hand on Barry Windham and follows it up with a couple more. Running clothesline from Maxx Payne was actually MIGHTY sloppy. There's a two count on the pin. Windham blocks a kick from Maxx Payne. Big kick from Windham staggers Payne but that's about it. Payne hits a punch, but takes one right back. Again! A slugfest erupts in the ring! Running clothesline from Barry Windham was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Payne blocks a kick from Barry Windham. Weak bodyslam by Payne. Barry Windham hooks up a suplex, but it is blocked. Payne scores with a low blow, then turns it into a small package! The referee didn't see the illegal blow! 1...2...3! Barry Windham got screwed out of the victory!

My Opinion: DUD. I refuse to say any more about it.

Overall:49

Crowd Reaction:42

Match Quality:57

Redneck Thunder was SCREWED out of a victory by Maxx Payne. A rematch will be in the cards soon, let me promise you that.

Abdullah The Butcher vs Zach Gowan.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Wack kick from Abdullah. Gowan gets splashed in the corner. Covers for a quick two count. Abdullah The Butcher misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Zach Gowan arm drags Abdullah over and locks on an armbar. Abdullah takes a chop from Gowan. Face crusher from Gowan on Abdullah sets up for an elbowdrop. Gowan charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Abdullah hits a piledriver on Zach Gowan. I know I wouldn't let someone that bad give me a piledriver. Zach Gowan is in trouble. Here it comes - Sudanese Elbow Drop. 1....2...3, it's finished.

My Opinion: I'll give a 1\2* rating because they were actually able to hit a couple of spots.

Overall:58

Crowd Reaction:56

Match Quality:60

Abdullah pounds Gowan into a pulp. I hope Mr. Warrior has gotten it out of his system. His beef with Gowan is Hogan brought him in without making any of the qualifications of PWH/DDW.

Honky Tonk Man vs Rick Steiner.

Match Background: This match is for the 10 Minute Time Limit title. Rick Steiner has been 10 Minute Time Limit champion since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Rick Steiner hits a right hand on Honky Tonk Man and follows it up with a couple more. Big kick from Steiner staggers HTM but that's about it. Covers for a quick two count. HTM blocks a kick from Rick Steiner. Honky Tonk Man with a sloppy back bodydrop on Steiner. We almost had another Benoit/Sabu situation there. Honky Tonk Man with an arm drag that somehow looks like Rick Steiner did all the work. Rick Steiner walks into a suplex from Honky Tonk Manand gets taken down hard. Steiner pushes out of a Honky Tonk Man hold. Powerslam from Rick Steiner on HTM. Honky Tonk Man can barely stand. Belly To Back Suplex! 1....2....3.

My Opinion: -*. That's right. NEGATIVE ONE STAR. That's what you get for this CRAP.

Overall:58

Crowd Reaction:63

Match Quality:47

Belly to Back Suplex finishes it. It must have been one hell of a suplex. Well our champion's finisher is a clothesline, so more power to Rick Steiner.

Road Warriors vs Midnight Express.

Match Background: Road Warriors are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. Midnight Express are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. Animal knows Hawk from their battles for World Japan in Japan. This match is for the Red and Yellow Tag titles. Road Warriors have been Red and Yellow Tag champions since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Road Warrior Hawk punches away at Stan Lane only to get the tides turned quickly. Big forearm by Hawk draws laughter from the crowd because it was THAT bad. Side suplex from Hawk. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. Tag between Stan Lane and Bobby Eaton. Hawk receives a spinning neckbreaker from Eaton. Hawk kicks Bobby Eaton in the gut to reverse the momentum. Road Warrior Hawk punches away at Bobby Eaton only to get the tides turned quickly. Hawk tags out to Road Warrior Animal. Road Warrior Hawk scoops up Eaton. Animal bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Road Warrior Animal DDTs Eaton in a move that is so poorly executed, you can actually see that Bobby Eaton's head didn't touch the mat at all. Flapjack from Animal on Eaton. Tag between Road Warrior Animal and Road Warrior Hawk. Road Warriors have Bobby Eaton to themselves. Doomsday Device! 1....2....3! It's over.

My Opinion: You barely escaped a DUD rating. 1/4*.

Overall:66

Crowd Reaction:71

Match Quality:55

The Road Warriors may hold those belts for quite some time. No one else is worthy enough for the belts. Plus Mr. Warrior likes them because of their fashion sense. The facepaint.

Brian Knobbs vs Marty Jannetty.

Match Background: This will be a texas death bout. This match is for the Hardcore title. Brian Knobbs has been Hardcore champion since 12 November 2003.

The Match: Marty Jannetty sets up a chair, then bounces off it to hit a flying avalanche into the corner. VERY Sabu-like. Marty Jannetty hits a shitty missile dropkick on Knobbs. Covers for a quick two count. Marty Jannetty misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Brian Knobbs connects with some weak punches on Marty Jannetty. Brian Knobbs hits a BIG clothesline for two! BIG clothesline from Knobbs. 'BIG' because it missed by a mile! ONE...TWO...THREE. Knobbs defeats Jannetty. The referee is counting: 5....6....Marty Jannetty is back up. Knobbs hits a stump piledriver on Marty Jannetty. Jannetty counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Badly executed second rope splash by Jannetty. Badly executed second rope splash by Jannetty. Jannetty drops an elbow...but Brian Knobbs moves out of the way. Brian Knobbs moves in for the kill. Here it comes - DDT. 1....2...3, it's finished. The referee counts to 10, this match is over! Marty Jannetty slides to the outside and grabs a chair, then climbs back into the ring. Knobbs turns around...and gets planted with a huge chair shot to the head! He is left down and out on the canvas.

My Opinion: One SOLE bright spot in this match keeps it from going into DUD territory. 1/4*.

Overall:57

Crowd Reaction:58

Match Quality:55

Two badly executed second rope splashes from Marty Jannetty in a row. I think we will have a third match between these two at the next PPV which has yet to be named.

Jim Duggan vs Kamala.

Match Background: Duggan will be retiring shortly. This match is for the United States title. Jim Duggan has been United States champion since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Messed up bodyslam by Kamala almost kills Duggan. Sloppy discus punch from Kamala barely connects on Duggan. Kamala connects with a crappy looking standing spinebuster. Does everyone use that move these days? Pin, but Duggan is out just before the three count. Punch by Kamala, missing Duggan COMPLETELY. I'm just glad thatDuggan didn't sell it. Hooks the leg for a two count. Duggan blocks a punch. Jim Duggan hits a BIG clothesline for two! Jim Duggan hits a bulldog off the ropes. Kamala fights out of a grapple. Kamala DDTs Duggan in a move that is so poorly executed, you can actually see that Jim Duggan's head didn't touch the mat at all. Kamala has Jim Duggan down on the canvas. Giant Splash!!! 1....2....3!! It's all over.

My Opinion: A DUD here would have actually been generous! -*

Overall:58

Crowd Reaction:65

Match Quality:42

Jim Duggan seemed rather subdued during this match like this may be his last. Kamala is the NEW United States Champion.

Jim Duggan gets on the stick and says that he has been putting this off for too long. He is going to retire. Tonight was his last match. He says he was looking all over for a young star to pass on his two by four to, but he couldn't find one so he settled on Bradshaw. Out comes Bradshaw in Jim Duggan style tights and Bradshaw gives a big ho. Duggan hands Bradshaw his two by four. Duggan has passed his two by four to Bradshaw. Bradshaw then says that if anyone messes with the good ol' USA, he will have their country turned into a parking lot. Hacksaw Bradshaw leaves the ring.

74

Vader vs Randy Savage.

Match Background: This will be a cage bout.

The Match: Savage takes a headbutt from Vader. Randy Savage charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Vader and Savage climb the cage....but both end up crashing back to the canvas after a struggle! Savage reverses a waistlock. Big kick from Savage staggers Vader but that's about it. Vader receives some punishment by Randy Savage but with that horrid offense, we're the only ones truly being punished. Randy Savage drives Vader into the cage side. Savage climbs the cage...but Vader is in hot pursuit, and they both end up back on the canvas. Randy Savage gets taken down out of nowhere! Spear by Vader. Randy Savage can barely stand. Vader Bomb!!! That shook the ring. Vader climbs the cage, Savage can only look on in despair. Vader escapes for the win! Vader is still in the ring celebrating. Randy Savage pushes the referee away. Randy Savage slams Vader down. Randy Savage climbs to the top rope and hits the Savage Elbow!

My Opinion: *1\2 rating is all it gets from me.

Overall:78

Crowd Reaction:84

Match Quality:65

Vader beats Savage but Savage gets his heat back. Savage is still suspended from wrestling by Warrior by losing this match.

Nikita Koloff vs Lex Luger.

Match Background: This match is for the Big Red and Yellow title. Nikita Koloff has been Big Red and Yellow champion since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Koloff takes a weak kick. Boring brawling from Lex Luger is the cure for insomnia. There's a two count on the pin. Lex Luger misses a clothesline. Big forearm by Koloff draws laughter from the crowd because it was THAT bad. Nikita Koloff hits some weak-looking punches in the corner, but Lex Luger is able to block them and return the favor in spades. Luger takes a couple of weak clotheslines. Luger blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Lex Luger DDTs Koloff in a move that is so poorly executed, you can actually see that Nikita Koloff's head didn't touch the mat at all. Lex Luger floors Nikita Koloff. Here it comes...Torture Rack! Nikita Koloff taps! Lex Luger climbs each turnbuckle in turn, working the crowd as he celebrates his victory

My Opinion: -*. Somehow, you actually took AWAY from any enjoyment I could have had watching this.

Overall:62

Crowd Reaction:72

Match Quality:42

Lex Luger FINALLY wins the big one. He is the NEW Big Red and Yellow Champion. This should kick off a big title reign. Aw who am I kidding? Flexy Lexy is just keeping that belt warm until the WWE fires Nathan Jones so the REAL next Hulk Hogan can take over.

Overall:62

0.30 Buyrate for Viva La Warrior.

Lightning Flik · August 10, 2003

:lol: Oh my~! Hacksaw Bradshaw?

I could see it.

Hank Kingsley · August 10, 2003

Oh my god.

This IS fantastic.

August 10, 2003

YES! My hero Nathan Jones is returning.

madmatt2002 · August 11, 2003

Abdullah the Butcher is becoming a non wrestling and Zach Gowan has increased his wage by 10 percent. Greedy little punk.

Power and Paint for 12/3/03:

Mr. Warrior is pissed at everyone screwing with him so he decides to do something about it. Four people are standing behind Mr. Warrior. Former PWH Champion Giant Gonzales who will be his bodyguard. Sherri Martel will be his personal assistant. Barry Horowitz and Maxx Payne will be now known as 2 Bad Mothertruckers and will be his own personal glass ceiling against people trying to one up him. Mr. Warrior says Randy Savage is now fired, so don't expect him around here. Lex Luger is suspended for the week for daring to win the title from Nikita Koloff from the PPV. He would fire Luger but he doesn't want him showing up on TNA programing and trashing the title. Zach Gowan committed the biggest sin of all and upped his pay by 10 percent. Gowan will face Brian Knobbs for the Hardcore Title. Mr. Warrior said he didn't even HIRE Hacksaw Bradshaw. However Bradshaw will get a contract if he beats Kamala tonight and wins the United States Championship. Mr. Warrior said he will be back later to announce the Main Event for Rockin' New Year on December 31st. Mr. Warrior also extends an open invitation to Nathan Jones and gets the crowd to start a "Free Nathan, Vince" chant. Mr. Warrior then tells the crowd to shut up and said just because they like Nathan Jones, he won't hire him(damn bastard still hasn't gotten himself released from the WWE. Go piss on Stephanie or something, Nathan. I'm begging you). Mr. Warrior says he will be back later.

63

2 Bad Mothertruckers vs Doink The Clown and Marc Mero.

Match Background: Horowitz and Payne are teaming up as 2 Bad Mothertruckers for the first time tonight.

The Match: Punch by Horowitz, missing Mero COMPLETELY. I'm just glad thatMero didn't sell it. Messed up bodyslam by Horowitz almost kills Mero. Tag to Maxx Payne. Payne slams Marc Mero down. Mero is sure in trouble now. Hooks the leg for a two count. Maxx Payne scores with a crappy looking standing spinebuster. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. Tag to Barry Horowitz. 2 Bad Mothertruckers whip Mero into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Mero flips out of a Barry Horowitz bodyslam attempt. Tag to Doink The Clown. Barry Horowitz takes a butterfly suplex from Doink. Horowitz walks into a jaw breaker. Tag between Doink The Clown and Marc Mero. Doink The Clown scoops up Horowitz. Mero bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Spin kick by Marc Mero to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. Super kick by Marc Mero. Tag between Marc Mero and Doink The Clown. Big dropkick by Doink The Clown, who got a ton of air on the move. Horowitz pushes out of a Doink The Clown hold. Tag between Barry Horowitz and Maxx Payne. Payne hits a piledriver on Doink The Clown. I know I wouldn't let someone that bad give me a piledriver. Doink The Clown is all alone...Glass Ceiling!! 1....2....3!

My Opinion: DUD. I refuse to say any more about it.

Overall:47

Crowd Reaction:42

Match Quality:53

2 Bad Mothertruckers are 1-0 in DDW. You don't want to mess with these Mothertruckers.

Zach Gowan vs Brian Knobbs.

Match Background: This will be a hardcore bout. This match is for the Hardcore title. Brian Knobbs has been Hardcore champion since 12 November 2003.

The Match: Knobbs hits a stump piledriver on Zach Gowan. Whip into an upright table by Knobbs. Knobbs DDTs Zach Gowan. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! A powerslam so weak, my grandmother could have performed it, is actually pulled off by Knobbs on Gowan. Hooks the leg for a two count. Zach Gowan pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Knobbs takes a hard, stinging chop from Gowan. One word: Ow. Back heel kick from Gowan on Knobbs. Knobbs ducks a wild right hand. Messed up bodyslam by Knobbs almost kills Gowan. Zach Gowan can barely stand. Powerslam! 1....2....3. Marty Jannetty comes running down the aisle with a chair and into the ring! Knobbs turns...and narrowly avoids vicious chair shot! Brian Knobbs spins Jannetty around. Brian Knobbs hits the Powerslam! Brian Knobbs has left Jannetty down on the canvas.

My Opinion: DUD. That's about all I can say without getting into obsenities.

Overall:58

Crowd Reaction:62

Match Quality:49

It's Marty Jannetty's quest to win the Hardcore Title. Brian Knobbs however is one step a head of the Other Rocker.

Hacksaw Bradshaw vs Kamala.

Match Background: This match is for the United States title. Kamala has been United States champion since 26 November 2003.

The Match: Uninspiring brawling from Hacksaw Bradshaw. Check them brawlin' stats, boy. Hacksaw Bradshaw DOESN'T take a page out of Andre the Giant's book and hits an incredibly weak headbutt on Kamala. Hacksaw Bradshaw punches away at Kamala only to get the tides turned quickly. There's a two count on the pin. Punch by Bradshaw, missing Kamala COMPLETELY. I'm just glad thatKamala didn't sell it. There's a two count on the pin. Kamala counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Uninspiring brawling from Kamala. Check them brawlin' stats, boy. There's a two count on the pin. BIG clothesline from Kamala. 'BIG' because it missed by a mile! Bradshaw reverses a waistlock. Bradshaw DDTs Kamala. Hacksaw Bradshaw moves in for the kill. Fallaway Slam!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

My Opinion: -*. Somehow, you actually took AWAY from any enjoyment I could have had watching this.

Overall:55

Crowd Reaction:62

Match Quality:41

Hacksaw Bradshaw is your NEW United States Champion and he gets a contract with DDW as well. After a long and dark week, the United States Title is back where it belongs. Around the waist of a 100 percent pureblood America. God Bless Bradshaw.

Hacksaw Bradshaw is backstage when he bumps into Nikita Koloff. This should be good. Bradshaw tells Koloff to move his dirty commie ass out of the way. Koloff says that Bradshaw is nothing but an infideal. Thems fighting words, pal. Bradshaw says that if Koloff wants some of him, he can have it next week. Non-Title of course because he is a dirty commie and he says that the United States Title should only go around the waist of an American. Koloff says fine and he says he will finish Bradshaw next week. Hacksaw Bradshaw says that if Koloff wants some of him after the match, he can find him by the showers. O-Kay.

67

Mr. Warrior says after reviewing everything he has decided to have Lex Luger vs Vader for the Big Red and Yellow Title at Rockin' New Year Warrior. Why? Why the hell not.

56

Overall:51

The ratings for Power and Paint need to improve. 2.27 Rating. Back to graveyard next week. That extra segment was SO fine. [sends out a promo tape to comedy central with Warrior shaking the ropes for two and a half hours. If that doesn't win them, I don't know what will]

Lightning Flik · August 11, 2003

Damn madmatt, that was funny. I really like the Koloff & Hacksaw Bradshaw (why not rename him to Hackshaw? It all rhymes you know). Great stuff.

madmatt2002 · August 11, 2003

Power and Paint for 12/10/03:

We are 3 weeks away from Rockin' New Year Warrior and HEY isn't that Theodore Long. Fresh off being fired from the WWE, he is here. He says Playa, 12 times in 2 minutes, and thuggin' and buggin' about 6. Theodore Long says that the black man is underepresented in DDW so he is going to bring some affirmintive action to this shiznit. Ya know what I'm saying Playa. He brings out his charge, Ron Simmons. Ron Simmons comes out and he yells:"KILL WHITEY. CRUSH. DAMN" Long said he will beat up some white boy when he hits the ring next week. Playa.

77(this is the highest rated segment, Non-Hulk Hogan so far, I believe)

Bushwackers vs 2 Bad Mothertruckers.

Match Background: Luke is making his debut at this show. Butch is making his debut at this show. Bushwackers are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion.

The Match: Horowitz takes a couple of weak clotheslines. BIG clothesline from Luke. 'BIG' because it missed by a mile! Hooks the leg for a two count. Luke tags out to Bushwacker Butch. Bushwackers whip Horowitz into the ropes and hit a double back elbow. Bushwacker Butch punches away at Barry Horowitz. There's a two count on the pin. Bushwacker Butch connects with some weak punches on Barry Horowitz. Horowitz counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Flapjack from Horowitz on Butch. Horowitz tags out to Maxx Payne. Bushwacker Butch takes a right hand to the temple from Payne. Maxx Payne hits an ugly looking bulldog off the ropes. Bushwacker Butch elbows Maxx Payne in the face to break a hammerlock. Tag to Bushwacker Luke. Bushwacker Luke hits a bulldog off the ropes. Luke DDTs Maxx Payne. Pin, but Payne is out just before the three count. Bushwacker Luke punches away at Maxx Payne only to get the tides turned quickly. Maxx Payne once again takes the advantage after blocking a few punches and connecting with some forearms. Maxx Payne DDTs Luke, but it just looked terrible. Jack Victory has climbed up onto the apron! Luke turns...and falls for the distraction! Maxx Payne attacks Luke from behind! Bushwacker Luke gets knocked to the ground by Payne. Payne Killer!!! Bushwacker Luke taps out! Bushwackers are beaten down three-on-two by the combined forces of Horowitz, Payne and Victory.

My Opinion: -*. Somehow, you actually took AWAY from any enjoyment I could have had watching this.

Overall:44

Crowd Reaction:40

Match Quality:48

2 Bad Mothertruckers are 2-0 with the help of their new manager, Jack Victory. So Warrior's Corporation consists of:Mr. Warrior(CEO), Giant Gonzales(bodyguard), Sherri Martel(personal assistant), Horowitz and Payne(glass ceiling), and Jack Victory(hmm what role would he play. I guess all good Corporations need a coffee boy).

We have a look at a masked man delivering a bunch of Flying Elbowdrops. The graphic says:"Mr. Madness is coming." I don't have a CLUE who might be under the hood. Do you? Thought not.

81

Hacksaw Bradshaw vs Nikita Koloff.

Match Background: Hacksaw Bradshaw is the reigning United States champion, and has been since 03 December 2003.

The Match: Messed up bodyslam by Koloff almost kills Bradshaw. Sloppy discus punch from Nikita Koloff barely connects on Bradshaw. Side suplex from Koloff. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. Pin, but Bradshaw is out just before the three count. Nikita Koloff hits a BIG clothesline for two! Hooks the leg for a two count. Hacksaw Bradshaw is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Hacksaw Bradshaw punches away at Nikita Koloff. Hacksaw Bradshaw hits a bulldog off the ropes. Koloff blocks a kick from Hacksaw Bradshaw. Nikita Koloff DDTs Bradshaw in a move that is so poorly executed, you can actually see that Hacksaw Bradshaw's head didn't touch the mat at all. Nikita Koloff gets a roll-up...and grabs a handful of tights as well! The referee doesn't see it: 1....2...3!!

My Opinion: A DUD here would have actually been generous! -*

Overall:60

Crowd Reaction:67

Match Quality:44

Nikita Koloff attempts to get in Hacksaw Bradshaw's pants. I wonder if we are going to see a rematch with the title on the line at Rockin' New Year Warrior. Who knows, because I misplaced my napkin again(this is becoming a BAD running gag).

Brian Knobbs vs Lex Luger.

Match Background: This will be a special guest referee bout. Marty Jannetty will be the referee for this match. Lex Luger is the reigning Big Red and Yellow champion, and has been since 26 November 2003. Brian Knobbs is the reigning Hardcore champion, and has been since 12 November 2003.

The Match: Brian Knobbs punches away at Lex Luger. Knobbs hits a stump piledriver on Lex Luger. Hooks the leg for a two count. Brian Knobbs gets taken down out of nowhere! Knobbs takes a weak kick. A powerslam so weak, my grandmother could have performed it, is actually pulled off by Luger on Knobbs. There's a two count on the pin. Flapjack from Luger on Knobbs. Pin, but Knobbs is out just before the three count. Lex Luger strikes Brian Knobbs. Luger walks into a drop toe hold. Brian Knobbs hits a sloppy ass bulldog off the ropes. There's a two count on the pin. Sloppy discus punch from Brian Knobbs barely connects on Luger. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Big forearm by Knobbs draws laughter from the crowd because it was THAT bad. Brian Knobbs punches away at Lex Luger only to get the tides turned quickly. Luger reverses a waistlock. Lex Luger strikes Brian Knobbs. Sloppy discus punch from Lex Luger barely connects on Knobbs. Brian Knobbs is in control. Marty Jannetty comes up behind...low blow! Knobbs collapses to the floor. Lex Luger takes the advantage. Lex Luger has Brian Knobbs down on the canvas. Here it comes...Torture Rack! Brian Knobbs taps! Vader comes running down the aisle, and gets into the ring! Vader spins Luger around. Vader hits the Vader Bomb! Lex Luger has been left down on the canvas.

My Opinion: -*. That's right. NEGATIVE ONE STAR. That's what you get for this CRAP.

Overall:57

Crowd Reaction:65

Match Quality:41

Marty Jannetty screwed Brian Knobbs out of the win. Brian Knobbs will face Marty Jannetty at Rockin' New Year Warrior in a...lets see what is a cool new stipulation for a Hardcore Title Match...I KNOW. A hardcore match for the Hardcore Title. This kind of revolutionary thinking is why DDW is number one.

Overall:56

0.80 Rating for Power and Paint.

NEXT WEEK:Ron Simmons kills a white boy, we will find out more about Mr. Madness, and Lex Luger and Marty Jannetty face Brian Knobbs and Vader. Tune in or don't tune in, I guess.

madmatt2002 · August 12, 2003

Power and Paint for 12/17/03:

Gangrel vs Ron Simmons.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Ron Simmons strikes Gangrel. Gangrel takes a right hand to the temple from Simmons. Hooks the leg for a two count. Gangrel blocks a kick from Ron Simmons. Weak bodyslam on Simmons by Gangrel sets up a legdrop. Simmons receives some punishment by Gangrel but with that horrid offense, we're the only ones truly being punished. Simmons takes a vertical suplex, but pops right back up. Gangrel drops an elbow...but Ron Simmons moves out of the way. Ron Simmons hits an ugly looking bulldog off the ropes. Gangrel is in trouble. Here it comes - Whitey Crusher. 1....2...3, it's finished.

My Opinion: I'll give a 3/4 star rating, but only if you promise to improve as a booker.

Overall:60

Crowd Reaction:57

Match Quality:64

Ron Simmons destroys Gangrel in a match that might have been a Sunday Night Heat Main Event Five Years Ago. After all no one is more white than a vampire.

Mr. Warrior says that next week Doink the Clown will face the Godfather and the winner gets to get stiffed by er face Rick Steiner for the 10 Minute Time Limit Title at Rockin' New Year Warrior.

62

2 Bad Mothertruckers vs Axl Rotten and Barry Windham.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Weak slam from Axl sets Horowitz for something, but if it was as weak as that slam, then Horowitz has no worries. Barry Horowitz powers out of a Axl Rotten headlock. Barry Horowitz strikes Axl Rotten. Horowitz tags out to Maxx Payne. Running clothesline from Maxx Payne was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Axl gets splashed in the corner. Payne walks into a drop toe hold. Axl Rotten hits a weak elbow on Maxx Payne. Tag between Axl Rotten and Barry Windham. Barry Windham strikes Maxx Payne. Payne takes a vertical suplex, but pops right back up. Maxx Payne reverses a hip toss. Barry Windham takes a right hand to the temple from Payne. Tag between Maxx Payne and Barry Horowitz. Barry Horowitz scores with a shitty standing spinebuster. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Barry Horowitz hits a BIG clothesline for two! 2 Bad Mothertruckers have Barry Windham to themselves. Glass Ceiling! 1....2....3! It's over.

My Opinion: A DUD here would have actually been generous! -*

Overall:44

Crowd Reaction:43

Match Quality:46

I have nothing to add other than 2 Bad Mothertruckers are 3-0. The streak continues.

Mr. Madness is coming. HE IS COMING. Next week on Power and Paint. Who could it be under the mask?

87

Brian Knobbs and Vader vs Lex Luger and Marty Jannetty.

Match Background: Lex Luger is the reigning Big Red and Yellow champion, and has been since 26 November 2003. Brian Knobbs is the reigning Hardcore champion, and has been since 12 November 2003.

The Match: Trying to channel the spirit of Misawa, Vader ends up chanelling Lex Luger instead and nails a running forearm to the face, minus the steel plate, of course. Rude Awakening neckbreaker on Lex Luger by Vader. Remember when that was a legit finish? There's a two count on the pin. Tag to Brian Knobbs. Vader \ Knobbs whip Luger into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Covers for a quick two count. A powerslam so weak, my grandmother could have performed it, is actually pulled off by Knobbs on Luger. Luger backdrops Brian Knobbs out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Lex Luger. Lex Luger hits a bulldog off the ropes. Covers for a quick two count. Luger tags out to Marty Jannetty. Flying elbow off the top rope by Marty Jannetty, getting as close to zero air as possible. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Knobbs walks into a spinning heel kick which almost causes a decapitation! Marty Jannetty misses a clothesline. Brian Knobbs strikes Marty Jannetty. Tag between Brian Knobbs and Vader. STIFF~! chop lights up Jannetty who covers up to try and stop the agonizing PAIN! Tag between Marty Jannetty and Lex Luger. Rude Awakening neckbreaker on Lex Luger by Vader. Remember when that was a legit finish? Vader whips Luger into the turnbuckles...and the ref is crushed! Lex Luger slams Vader, who rolls onto his stomach. What is Vader doing? Lex Luger picks him up and signals for a powerbomb. He raises Vader up...but then throws him off. Lex Luger saw that Vader had a chain and was ready to hit him with it. A kick to the gut stuns Vader, and the chain gets taken by Luger, who wraps it around his fist. Knock-out punch! Vader is out cold, KOed by his own weapon! The referee gets up to see the pinfall - 1....2....3! Another referee comes running down the aisle, and points out to the first official that Lex Luger used a steel chain to get this victory. The referee reverses the decision! Lex Luger has been disqualified! Jannetty and Luger remain in the ring. Lex Luger does not look happy at losing. Marty Jannetty goes to leave, but gets pulled back in by Luger. Tensions seem to be rising between these two.

My Opinion: You barely escaped a DUD rating. 1/4*.

Overall:63

Crowd Reaction:68

Match Quality:53

Dusty Finishes are your FRIEND when no one wants to job properly. Marty and Lex had a disagreement, most likely over drugs, so they will settle it in the RING next WEEK on POWER and paint. Be THERE or BE not THERE.

Next Week:Doink vs Godfather, Marty Jannetty vs Lex Luger in a non-title match, and Mr. Madness will be revealed.

madmatt2002 · August 12, 2003

Power and Paint for 12/24/03:

Doink The Clown vs Godfather.

Match Background: None.

The Match: A weak headbutt on Doink by Godfather causes nothing but pain for both. Godfather strikes away at Doink The Clown, not doing much damage at all. A weak headbutt on Doink by Godfather causes nothing but pain for both. Hooks the leg for a two count. Doink The Clown takes a right hand to the temple from Godfather. Covers for a quick two count. Doink reverses a waistlock. Doink The Clown snap suplexes Godfather. Hooks the leg for a two count. Massive back suplex! Godfather got snapped in half, but not literally because that would just end the match now wouldn't it. Godfather elbows Doink The Clown in the face to break a hammerlock. Godfather scores with a poor standing spinebuster. Godfather drives Doink The Clown into the corner. Ho Train!!! 1....2....3!! It's all over.

My Opinion: DUD. I refuse to say any more about it.

Overall:50

Crowd Reaction:44

Match Quality:57

Godfather gets the short end of the straw this month to face Rick Steiner at the PPV. This should be interesting to see what happens.

Hacksaw Bradshaw comes out but Nikita Koloff attacks him from behind. Koloff floors Bradshaw with a belt and leaves with it.

71

Mr. Madness comes out here. He tells him a little about himself. His favorite snack is Slim Jims and he is OUTRAGED that Mr. Warrior fired Randy Savage, who is his hero. He says he will not rest until the Macho Man is back. Oh Yeah!!!

76

Mr. Warrior comes out with his Posse and he says that Savage doesn't fool him. So at the PPV Mr. Madness will face Giant Gonzales Mask vs Hair. Body Hair that is. That includes Pubic Hair as well(can we say Pubic Hair on TV). Mr. Warrior also has some other matches to make at the PPV. Lex Luger will face Vader. In the interest of fairness, Mr. Warrior will be the Special Guest Referee(is that the smell of screwjob that I am smelling). Marty Jannetty faces Brian Knobbs for the Hardcore Title in a Hardcore Match. Hacksaw Bradshaw will face Nikita Koloff in an Ironman Match for the United States Title. 2 Bad Mothertruckers will face the Rock and Roll Express and then the winners of the Road Warriors inside a Steel Cage for the Tag Team Titles. Godfather faces Rick Steiner for the 10 Minute Time Limit Title. Zach Gowan will face Ron Simmons and that's it.

Overall:47

Lex Luger vs Marty Jannetty.

Match Background: This match is for the Big Red and Yellow title. Lex Luger has been Big Red and Yellow champion since 26 November 2003.

The Match: Some pretty weak shots by Luger. Jannetty takes a couple of weak clotheslines. Hooks the leg for a two count. Marty Jannetty fights out of a grapple. Face crusher from Jannetty on Luger sets up for an elbowdrop. Jannetty hits a short arm drag on Luger. Marty Jannetty arm drags Luger over and locks on an armbar. Marty Jannetty gets taken down out of nowhere! Lex Luger hits a sloppy ass bulldog off the ropes. Vader just slid into the ring out of nowhere! Vader has a chair, and drops Luger and Jannetty with devastating blows, causing the referee to call for the bell. This match has been ruled a no contest! Vader has a chair. Luger turns and takes a brutal shot to the head. Jannetty is next to take a hard shot. Vader has demolished everyone!

My Opinion: -*. Somehow, you actually took AWAY from any enjoyment I could have had watching this.

Overall:58

Crowd Reaction:64

Match Quality:45

Vader murders everyone. Will that be the sight we see in one week. Tune in to find out.

Overall:53

0.81 Rating for P and P.

Rockin' New Year Warrior Card:

DDW World Title Something Rotten in Denmark Match with Special Guest Referee Mr. Warrior:

Body Hair vs Mask:

Giant Gonzales vs Mr. Madness

God have Mercy on the Dames's sole Ironman Match for the DDW United States Title:

Hardcore Match for the DDW Hardcore Title:

Number One Contenders Match:

2 Bad Mothertruckers vs The Rock and Roll Express.

DDW Tag Team Title Cage Match:

The Road Warriors vs The Winners of the Number One Contenders Match.

10 Minute Time Limit Title Squash:

Zach Gowan continues pay for daring to up his pay by 10 Percent:

Ron Simmons(w/Theodore Long) vs Zach Gowan.

madmatt2002 · August 13, 2003

Well the Bad Luck continues. Marc Mero was signed by GCG in a written contract. Well he hasn't done much except tag with Doink a couple of times but I'm still pissed.

For Extras for the show I have special on screen graphics instead of the standard, my name is.... name tags that we normally use.

Rockin' New Year Warrior-December 31st 2003

Mr. Warrior and his corporation are having their New Year's Eve Party. Sherri Martel dances on the table while Barry Horowitz and Maxx Payne throw quarters at her. Giant Gonzales is passed out on the floor from a little too much to drink.

Overall:49

Zach Gowan vs Ron Simmons.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Wack kick from Simmons. Gowan takes a vertical suplex, but pops right back up. Covers for a quick two count. Gowan counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Gowan hits a dropkick on Ron Simmons. Actually, it barely touched! Zach Gowan strikes Simmons. Simmons takes a hard, stinging chop from Gowan. One word: Ow. Gowan charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Ron Simmons DDTs Gowan, but it just looked terrible. Ron Simmons moves in for the kill. Whitey Crusher!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

My Opinion: You barely escaped a DUD rating. 1/4*.

Overall:62

Crowd Reaction:66

Match Quality:54

The WWE Rejects open up the show with the bang. Ron Simmons is 2-0 against White Boys. Gowan is hopefully regretting upping his salary now.

Godfather vs Rick Steiner.

Match Background: This match is for the 10 Minute Time Limit title. Rick Steiner has been 10 Minute Time Limit champion since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Steiner strikes away at Godfather, not doing much damage at all. Rick Steiner strikes Godfather with a hard blow. There's a two count on the pin. Godfather pushes out of a Rick Steiner hold. Rick Steiner takes a right hand to the temple from Godfather. Godfather strikes Rick Steiner. Running clothesline from Godfather was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Rick Steiner pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Rick Steiner hits an ugly looking bulldog off the ropes. Rick Steiner moves in for the kill. Belly To Back Suplex!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

My Opinion: DUD. That's about all I can say without getting into obsenities.

Overall:54

Crowd Reaction:57

Match Quality:50

This is the second show in a row that Rick Steiner won with a belly to back suplex. I think the belly to back suplex is the DDW is the same of a Gasno Bomb off the steel cage through five flaming tables in other feds.

2 Bad Mothertruckers vs Rock N Roll Express.

Match Background: Rock N Roll Express are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion.

The Match: Payne slams Robert Gibson down. Gibson is sure in trouble now. Payne hits a piledriver on Robert Gibson. I know I wouldn't let someone that bad give me a piledriver. Tag to Barry Horowitz. A powerslam so weak, my grandmother could have performed it, is actually pulled off by Horowitz on Gibson. Hooks the leg for a two count. Side suplex from Horowitz. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. Tag between Barry Horowitz and Maxx Payne. 2 Bad Mothertruckers whip Gibson into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Pin, but Gibson is out just before the three count. Robert Gibson elbows Maxx Payne in the face to break a hammerlock. Tag between Robert Gibson and Ricky Morton. Payne walks into a spinning heel kick which almost causes a decapitation! Ricky Morton uses a running dropkick into the corner. That was just...ugh. Tag between Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson. Rock N Roll Express whip Payne into the ropes and hit a double clothesline. Maxx Payne takes a knee lift from Gibson. *sigh* Running knee lifts always remind me of the late Curt Hennig. Flying elbow off the top rope by Robert Gibson, getting as close to zero air as possible. Tag to Ricky Morton. Morton hits a soaring kick on Payne. Maxx Payne pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Payne tags out to Barry Horowitz. BIG clothesline from Horowitz. 'BIG' because it missed by a mile! Ricky Morton tries to get a big slam, but it is blocked when Horowitz goes to the eyes! Barry Horowitz quickly scores with a field-goal kick between the legs! Ricky Morton collapses! The referee didn't see the illegal blow! 1...2...3! Ricky Morton got screwed!

My Opinion: DUD. That's about all I can say without getting into obsenities.

Overall:50

Crowd Reaction:45

Match Quality:56

Barry Horowitz screwing Ricky Morton is YOUR Bad mental image of the day. Here comes the Cage and here comes the Road Warriors for the Tag Team Title Match.

2 Bad Mothertruckers vs Road Warriors.

Match Background: This will be a cage bout. Road Warriors are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. Animal knows Hawk very well as they work for World Japan in Japan. This match is for the Red and Yellow Tag titles. Road Warriors have been Red and Yellow Tag champions since 20 September 2003.

The Match: Barry Horowitz hits a bulldog off the ropes. Payne slams Road Warrior Hawk down. Hawk is sure in trouble now. Road Warrior Animal fights out of a grapple. Road Warrior Animal launches Horowitz into the cage wall. Animal climbs the cage...but Maxx Payne is in hot pursuit, and they both end up back on the canvas. Maxx Payne scoops up Animal. Horowitz bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Horowitz DDTs Road Warrior Hawk. Payne and Animal both climb up and over the cage, leaving their partners battling it out. Jack Victory appeared on the outside, and came in via the door...and floored Road Warrior Hawk with a chair! Horowitz took the opportunity and left the cage to get the win for 2 Bad Mothertruckers! Road Warriors are beaten down three-on-two by the combined forces of Horowitz, Payne and Victory.

My Opinion: -***. Giving out negative stars makes me feel bad inside. Well, not really, but it should!

Overall:48

Crowd Reaction:60

Match Quality:23

Lovely. Just lovely. -***. I have hit the big time. 2 Bad Mothertruckers are your NEW Tag Team Champions. The Road Warriors were bitches about jobbing so they are going to get the Zach Gowan treatment. Althrough I still have an Ironman Match between Bradshaw and Koloff so maybe I can top this horrible match. I still haven't reached Heroes of Wrestling levels but damn do I try.

Brian Knobbs vs Marty Jannetty.

Match Background: This will be a hardcore bout. This match is for the Hardcore title. Brian Knobbs has been Hardcore champion since 12 November 2003.

The Match: Marty Jannetty dropkicks Knobbs after leaping off an upturned shopping cart! Covers for a quick two count. Flying elbow off the top rope by Marty Jannetty, getting as close to zero air as possible. Covers for a quick two count. Knobbs counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! Weak slam from Knobbs sets Jannetty for something, but if it was as weak as that slam, then Jannetty has no worries. Whip into an upright table by Knobbs. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Jannetty ducks a wild right hand. Badly executed second rope splash by Jannetty. Hooks the leg for a two count. Knobbs blocks a kick from Marty Jannetty. Side suplex from Knobbs. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. Marty Jannetty slams Knobbs, who rolls onto his stomach. What is Brian Knobbs doing? Marty Jannetty picks him up and signals for a powerbomb. He raises Knobbs up...but then falls backward, getting crushed by his opponent in the process! Brian Knobbs is on top! 1....2....3! Looking at the replay, it appears that Knobbs had taken a chain out of his tights and wrapped it around his fist! Marty Jannetty must have been punched with that chain while in mid-powerbomb! What a cheap shot! Brian Knobbs offers a handshake to Jannetty...and he accepts it! No! Marty Jannetty levels Knobbs with a cheap shot right hand! Marty Jannetty spins Knobbs around. Marty Jannetty hits the Rocker Dropper! Brian Knobbs has been floored after the match.

My Opinion: DUD. I refuse to say any more about it.

Overall:56

Crowd Reaction:58

Match Quality:54

How would Marty lift up Knobbs for a power bomb? If that happened in real life, he would be a permanent part of the ground. Knobbs retains the title and we will have a FOURTH match between these two down the road.

Hacksaw Bradshaw vs Nikita Koloff.

Match Background: This will be an iron man bout. This match is for the United States title. Hacksaw Bradshaw has been United States champion since 03 December 2003.

The Match: FIRST FALL: BORING ass brawling from Bradshaw. Weak slam from Bradshaw sets Koloff for something, but if it was as weak as that slam, then Koloff has no worries. There's a two count on the pin. Nikita Koloff reverses a hip toss. Boring brawling from Nikita Koloff is the cure for insomnia. Some pretty weak shots by Koloff. A powerslam so weak, my grandmother could have performed it, is actually pulled off by Koloff on Bradshaw. Hacksaw Bradshaw is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Powerslam from Hacksaw Bradshaw on Koloff. ONE...TWO...THREE. Bradshaw defeats Koloff. SECOND FALL: Hacksaw Bradshaw hits some weak-looking punches in the corner, but Nikita Koloff is able to block them and return the favor in spades. Hacksaw Bradshaw DOESN'T take a page out of Andre the Giant's book and hits an incredibly weak headbutt on Koloff. Hacksaw Bradshaw DOESN'T take a page out of Andre the Giant's book and hits an incredibly weak headbutt on Koloff. There's a two count on the pin. Big forearm by Bradshaw draws laughter from the crowd because it was THAT bad. Hooks the leg for a two count. Koloff blocks a kick from Hacksaw Bradshaw. Some pretty weak shots by Koloff. Covers for a quick two count. Nikita Koloff DDTs Bradshaw in a move that is so poorly executed, you can actually see that Hacksaw Bradshaw's head didn't touch the mat at all. Nikita Koloff misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Sloppy discus punch from Hacksaw Bradshaw barely connects on Koloff. Hacksaw Bradshaw moves in for the kill. Here it comes - Fallaway Slam. 1....2...3, it's finished. END OF BOUT.

My Opinion: -*. Somehow, you actually took AWAY from any enjoyment I could have had watching this.

Overall:56

Crowd Reaction:62

Match Quality:44

That actually didn't suck too much. Hacksaw Bradshaw kills the commie. What will be next? Who knows? I lost my booking napkin again.

Giant Gonzales vs Mr. Madness.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Madness strikes away at Giant Gonzales, not doing much damage at all. Giant Gonzales takes a right hand to the temple from Madness. Powerslam from Mr. Madness on Gonzales. Flapjack from Madness on Gonzales. Mr. Madness floors Giant Gonzales...and climbs the turnbuckles. Off the top - Madness Elbow hit hard. Mr. Warrior slides into the ring out of nowhere! Madness takes a stiff punch to the face and falls to the canvas. The referee calls for the DQ as Mr. Warrior continues to attack Madness. Giant Gonzales and Mr. Warrior try to beat down Mr. Madness, but end up getting run out of the ring by a furious Mr. Madness. They leave quickly before they end up taking any more punishment.

My Opinion: I've never felt so inclined to go into the negatives before this match came along. -***.

Overall:42

Crowd Reaction:51

Match Quality:24

Leave it to Gonzo to make me proud. He no sold everything. Mr. Warrior attempts to demask Savage er Mr. Madness. Yes Mr. Madness. He is NOT Randy Savage. I swear to God/Zeus/Allah/whatever divine figure you worship. The shaving is happening off camera however.

Vader vs Lex Luger.

Match Background: This will be a special guest referee bout. Mr. Warrior will be the referee for this match. This match is for the Big Red and Yellow title. Lex Luger has been Big Red and Yellow champion since 26 November 2003.

The Match: Vader takes a couple of weak clotheslines. Lex Luger hits a bulldog off the ropes. Covers for a quick two count. Vader pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Luger gets slammed down hard and winces in pain. Vader with a spinning neckbreaker on Luger. There's a two count on the pin. Brutal sit out powerbomb on Luger! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Running knee lift from Vader. Luger reverses a Vader hammerlock. BIG clothesline from Luger. 'BIG' because it missed by a mile! Hooks the leg for a two count. Lex Luger connects with a crappy looking standing spinebuster. Does everyone use that move these days? Pin, but Vader is out just before the three count. Lex Luger punches away at Vader. Lex Luger punches away at Vader only to get the tides turned quickly. Vader blocks a punch. Vader slams Lex Luger down and motions to the crowd. Vader scores with a big spinebuster. Luger looks to have the advantage. Mr. Warrior comes over. Mr. Warrior has Lex Luger down on the canvas. Here it comes - Gorilla Press and Splash, right on the money. Mr. Warrior pulls Vader on top. 1...2...3! Mr. Warrior has grabbed a chair from outside, and slides back into the ring. Lex Luger turns around, and gets floored with a brutal chair shot! Mr. Warrior has knocked Lex Luger out with a chair!

My Opinion: One SOLE bright spot in this match keeps it from going into DUD territory. 1/4*.

Overall:69

Crowd Reaction:78

Match Quality:50

Mr. Warrior basically won the title for Vader. Could this lead to the Smark's wet dream match:Lex Luger vs The Warrior. Only time will tell. Vader is the champion but he owes at least 9/10ths of that belt to the greatness that is Mr. Warrior.

Overall:54

And now the Top 100 of the year 2004. I will give you the top 10 and if any DDW allumni placed(and they should) I will tell you how they stacked up.

1. Kurt Angle(WWE)

2. Chris Jericho(WWE)

3. Low Ki(NWA TNA/ROH/MLW)

4. AJ Styles(GCG)

5. TAKA Michinoku(MLW/GCG/FLI)

6. Christopher Daniels(FLI/NWA TNA/MLW)

7. Eddie Guerrero(WWE)

8. Tajiri(WWE)

9. Chris Benoit(WWE)

10. Christian(WWE)

NO STARS. This is an outrage I tell you. Stupid 12 Year's olds on their parents computers and 40 year olds on their kid's computers. Don't reckonize true greatness.

0.28 Buyrate for Rockin' New Year Warrior

Zach Gowan increases his wage AGAIN by 10 percent. Little greedy punk. I guess I am going to have to give him the pirate gimmick I had planned. I didn't want to resort to this.

In sad news for Workrate fans everywhere, ROH has issued a Bankruptcy Warning. Rumors has it that the might of DDW is causing them to fold.

A new show on Comedy Central will be Tussels with Tassels. It is Prime Time which means we will be looking for new talent. New as in you haven't seen them in this company before.

Okay that's all for this update.

Lightning Flik · August 13, 2003

:lol: Great stuff madmatt. Great stuff.

Try bringing in ... JT Smith. That should help.

Or Steve Wilkos, the Uncle Fester Look Alike.

Or El Dandy...

...yes, I'm just tossing out names for no apparent reason.

King Cucaracha · August 13, 2003

I still don't know why you haven't signed Crappy the Clown yet. If not, then I'm pretty sure Dan Severn is in the game somewhere.

Pro Wrestling Hogan:The Revival

Recommended Posts

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Hank Kingsley 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Lightning Flik 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Guest ftwdevils2469

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Guest ftwdevils2469

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Guest Dave O'Neill, Journalist

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Guest Dave O'Neill, Journalist

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Zack Malibu 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Lightning Flik 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Zack Malibu 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

madmatt2002 0

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Lightning Flik 0

Share this post