Holy, PAAARTY ANIMAL

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

My only questions are this:

 

Who are you?

How do you fit into this?

Why all the hate?

 

Or is it just because it's the "cool" thing to do?

At least with Banky it's justifiable.

 

We're both Seniors in College

[Your Paragon of Virtue 0]

Ha, you may be on to something.

Hey, even a stopped clock is right twice a day.

Heh, I actually laughed at that one.

[Kinetic 0]

I'd like to go on record as saying that I lead the jet-set lifestyle of a wealthy playboy. In the florid prose of the truly educated, I will now describe for you the unimaginable luxury in which I live my every waking moment: For one thing, my parents are both wealthy beyond your wildest dreams. Croesus blushes when he peers upon their bank statement, and much of that money has been earmarked for my use, thus ensuring that I'll never be forced to work in construction or textiles or grease maintenance like you bottom-dwellers. Their riches and social clout have allowed me to attend and graduate from not just one Ivy League school, but all of them. What's more, I could get an honorary degree from any school in this country faster than any one of you could get the clap from Drunk Suzie down the hall in your fetid state school dorm buildings. Did someone mention women? Well, I've had them all. I took pictures and posted them on the Internet. No, you may not see them. Like stimulated chimps, your fingers--all calloused and blistered from hours spent earning $2.65 impregnating barnyard animals--would creep down your bib overalls and begin engaging in something rather unsavory, as opposed to appreciating the artistry involved in my lovemaking. But rest assured that no amount of effort--no electronic devices, no sordid dates to the laundromat, no pills you ordered after seeing a terribly convincing infomercial on late night television--will ever enable you to pleasure a woman the way my mere glance can. I have pictures. And I've posted them on the internet.

[NYU 0]

Mik = Kinetic ?!?!

 

!!!

 

[Your Paragon of Virtue 0]

I'd like to go on record as saying that I lead the jet-set lifestyle of a wealthy playboy. In the florid prose of the truly educated, I will now describe for you the unimaginable luxury in which I live my every waking moment: For one thing, my parents are both wealthy beyond your wildest dreams. Croesus blushes when he peers upon their bank statement, and much of that money has been earmarked for my use, thus ensuring that I'll never be forced to work in construction or textiles or grease maintenance like you bottom-dwellers. Their riches and social clout have allowed me to attend and graduate from not just one Ivy League school, but all of them. What's more, I could get an honorary degree from any school in this country faster than any one of you could get the clap from Drunk Suzie down the hall in your fetid state school dorm buildings. Did someone mention women? Well, I've had them all. I took pictures and posted them on the Internet. No, you may not see them. Like stimulated chimps, your fingers--all calloused and blistered from hours spent earning $2.65 impregnating barnyard animals--would creep down your bib overalls and begin engaging in something rather unsavory, as opposed to appreciating the artistry involved in my lovemaking. But rest assured that no amount of effort--no electronic devices, no sordid dates to the laundromat, no pills you ordered after seeing a terribly convincing infomercial on late night television--will ever enable you to pleasure a woman the way my mere glance can. I have pictures. And I've posted them on the internet.

Liar.

[Kinetic 0]

That must be the public school education talking. It's not your fault and I forgive you.

[EL BRUJ0 0]

Just admit that you really are a loser like the rest of us, Kinetic.

 

After all, you don't have any cool pictures of yourself drinking at a bar with your cool pals, do you?

 

So, shut the fuck up and go back to headbanging that mullet while listening to Poison in your Trans-Am.

[NYU 0]

And going to some community college, and NOT an Ivy League. Ewwwwww !

[Mik 0]

Yawn. Where is Banky to entertain me with an insult that has not already been repeated 300 times by other people?

[Kinetic 0]

I'd also like to go on record as saying that the long post up there was not intended as an insult to Mik, who I have nothing in particular against. I'm just as desperate as any of you to join the growing legions of Bankettes and will stop at nothing until he acknowledges me.

[Mik 0]

I'm just as desperate as any of you to join the growing legions of Bankettes and will stop at nothing until he acknowledges me.

Paging Chave, OlympicheroRVD.

 

Here's a note guys, if you REALLY want Banky to like you, you'd serve best to make up your own insults and not just repeat the ones he's already used.

 

*patiently awaits jokes that include being a senior, being at a bar, or perhaps even going to an ivy league school*

 

Don't let me down, you clowns.

[Your Paragon of Virtue 0]

I'm just as desperate as any of you to join the growing legions of Bankettes and will stop at nothing until he acknowledges me.

Paging Chave, OlympicheroRVD.

 

Here's a note guys, if you REALLY want Banky to like you, you'd serve best to make up your own insults and not just repeat the ones he's already used.

 

*patiently awaits jokes that include being a senior, being at a bar, or perhaps even going to an ivy league school*

 

Don't let me down, you clowns.

So a senior at an Ivy League school walks into a bar....

[rising up out of the back seat-nuh 0]

I'm just as desperate as any of you to join the growing legions of Bankettes and will stop at nothing until he acknowledges me.

Paging Chave, OlympicheroRVD.

 

Here's a note guys, if you REALLY want Banky to like you, you'd serve best to make up your own insults and not just repeat the ones he's already used.

 

*patiently awaits jokes that include being a senior, being at a bar, or perhaps even going to an ivy league school*

 

Don't let me down, you clowns.

So a senior at an Ivy League school walks into a bar....

Ouch!

[Your Paragon of Virtue 0]

That must be the public school education talking. It's not your fault and I forgive you.

No public education over here boss. Product of the T to tha C to tha MOTHAFUCKIN DSB~!

 

WHERE DA HOOD AT~!