Bane & Seven from OVW

[the pinjockey 0]

ECTO COOLER~!

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

When Tomko is a heel, he tells Fertig about how their father used to beat their mother and them as kids, and Fertig starts to remember and gets really angry and Tomko channels that rage into eliminating the competition...

 

*checks off list*

[The Czech Republic 0]

I tried to play-up Gump with Terri saying "Have you ever been with a girl before?"... but then I don't think Fertig takes Home Economics so I couldn't really go far with it...

Fertig should be in Welding. Imagine the adventures there.

Just a retard boy on a Monday night, waiting for the match of his life,

 

He's a maniac, MANIAC, on the floor! ANd he's convulsing like he's never convulsed before....

[Tawren 0]

When Tomko is a heel, he tells Fertig about how their father used to beat their mother and them as kids, and Fertig starts to remember and gets really angry and Tomko channels that rage into eliminating the competition...

 

*checks off list*

Of course, Fertig will win a title, TomCo will want it, and Fertig will LAY A HWOOPIN DOWN~!.

[the pinjockey 0]

You could play off an episode of Law and Order where Terri tricks Fertig into having sex with her, by saying they are just playing. Then he won't tell anyone, because he wants to feel like a grownup. Unfortunately he becomes sick and has to tell people. Therefore teaching people a valuable lesson about sexual harrassment and STDs.

[Slayer 0]

So we went from Of Mice and Men to Awakenings?

 

you guys are something else

Don't forget Rain Man and Flowers For Algernon. And if we can get some more gold nuggets in this baby I'll move to retire this to Classics.

Have we covered every retard movie then?

 

Wait, where's Forest Gump... or The Other Sister... we need a female retard for Fertig to bang

Must....resist.....Lita joke.

Fertig: Are you ready? Cause I'm ready

Lita: No Fertig, uh, I'm not weady

Fertig: Ohh...

Lita: I wath thinking we couldth wait 'til the nexth holiday cause holidayth are thpecial.

Fertig: oh cause I feel special right now Lita.

[Guest wrestlingbs]

You could play off an episode of Law and Order where Terri tricks Fertig into having sex with her, by saying they are just playing. Then he won't tell anyone, because he wants to feel like a grownup. Unfortunately he becomes sick and has to tell people. Therefore teaching people a valuable lesson about sexual harrassment and STDs.

Notice that Terri is always the slut in these stories.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Test and Steiner (decked out in matching high school jackets) pick on Fertig, and Stacy feels sorry for him and they become friends. She then falls in love with him which leads to the Fertig/Test match...

[The Czech Republic 0]

Imagine the silent class warfare between Nowinski and Special K.

[the pinjockey 0]

Not only a slut, but a slut with Gonorrhea.

[The Kid 0]

Hmm...but what entrance music would FERTIG~! use?

[Tawren 0]

You could play off an episode of Law and Order where Terri tricks Fertig into having sex with her, by saying they are just playing.  Then he won't tell anyone, because he wants to feel like a grownup.  Unfortunately he becomes sick and has to tell people.  Therefore teaching people a valuable lesson about sexual harrassment and STDs.

Notice that Terri is always the slut in these stories.

Who else are we gonna use? Jazz? Not even a retard would fuck her.

[Tawren 0]

Hmm...but what entrance music would FERTIG~! use?

Maybe that Crazy Bus song from Arthur...

[Guest wrestlingbs]

Test and Steiner (decked out in matching high school jackets) pick on Fertig, and Stacy feels sorry for him and they become friends. She then falls in love with him which leads to the Fertig/Test match...

Now we're getting off into Pumpkin territory....

[the pinjockey 0]

Well if he is going to use the little bus for his entrance, he has to use "The Wheels on the Bus" for his theme.

[The Czech Republic 0]

Test and Steiner (decked out in matching high school jackets) pick on Fertig

Steiner: Ahdunno bout choo, but this is my jacket I wore in 1993. Howjoo get that same one, bitch?

 

Test: um, uh...

 

Steiner: You stole Rob's, dintcha?

 

Test: He lent it to me?

[The Czech Republic 0]

Hmm...but what entrance music would FERTIG~! use?

Dead Milkmen - "Taking Retards to the Zoo"

[Guest wrestlingbs]

You could play off an episode of Law and Order where Terri tricks Fertig into having sex with her, by saying they are just playing.  Then he won't tell anyone, because he wants to feel like a grownup.  Unfortunately he becomes sick and has to tell people.  Therefore teaching people a valuable lesson about sexual harrassment and STDs.

Notice that Terri is always the slut in these stories.

Who else are we gonna use? Jazz? Not even a retard would fuck her.

Proving once again that Rodney Mack is an inanimate object.

[The Kid 0]

Crazy Bus

Crazy Bus

Riding on a crazy bus

Riding up

Riding down

Riding with a funny clown...

 

Nope, that should be Stephanie's theme.

[Tawren 0]

You could play off an episode of Law and Order where Terri tricks Fertig into having sex with her, by saying they are just playing.  Then he won't tell anyone, because he wants to feel like a grownup.  Unfortunately he becomes sick and has to tell people.  Therefore teaching people a valuable lesson about sexual harrassment and STDs.

Notice that Terri is always the slut in these stories.

Who else are we gonna use? Jazz? Not even a retard would fuck her.

Proving once again that Rodney Mack is an inanimate object.

Jazz is BACKING THE MACK. With her PENIS.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Social Services will try to put Fertig in a "home" for people with "special needs", but Tomko wants to look after him because he knows that places like "those" are only bad for someone like Fertig. The mean case worker Mr. Moriarty and his prudish secretary Ms. Crabtree try every sleazy trick in the book and get Tomko on the ropes to where even his millions can't save him. Just when he thinks all hope is lost, THE MCMAHON's enter the fold with their BILLIONS and help him out.

[The Czech Republic 0]

I think Fertig should also be a marvelous opera singer, a talent not even TomKo knows.

[Guest wrestlingbs]

You could play off an episode of Law and Order where Terri tricks Fertig into having sex with her, by saying they are just playing.  Then he won't tell anyone, because he wants to feel like a grownup.  Unfortunately he becomes sick and has to tell people.  Therefore teaching people a valuable lesson about sexual harrassment and STDs.

Notice that Terri is always the slut in these stories.

Who else are we gonna use? Jazz? Not even a retard would fuck her.

Proving once again that Rodney Mack is an inanimate object.

Jazz is BACKING THE MACK. With her PENIS.

Holy crap that's funny!

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

And Fertig sings pop, country and hip hop songs operatically??

[Tawren 0]

And Fertig sings pop, country and hip hop songs operatically??

Well, DUH.

[the pinjockey 0]

Geez, isn't wrestling and helping out everyone enough for you people?

 

I think, before he sings, Tomko should give him a sippy cup of apple juice to help him get ready.

[Slayer 0]

Social Services will try to put Fertig in a "home" for people with "special needs"...

Will Flair make a guest appearance as a resident?

[The Czech Republic 0]

Fertig can also make razor-laser-precise sporting-event predictions.

 

Storm: "So whaddya think there, Special K?"

Fertig: "Leafs beat Habs 3-2 in overtime off a Darcy Tucker goal"

[Guest wrestlingbs]

And Fertig sings pop, country and hip hop songs operatically??

Well, DUH.

Operatic rap-off between John Cena and Fertig!

[The Czech Republic 0]

Fertig's character is deeper than those of the entire Raw roster combined.