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ChrisMWaters

Kurt Not Dead According to WWE

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Gotta love the "severe internal injuries" line.

Well how else are they going to explain the magical pool of blood he laid in?

Probably from the Grade 3 Concussion.

 

They DID say it was the most severe.

 

Course, I'd trust a true medical opinion more.

Chris, if you can't trust whoever the plucked off the street to host Afterburn --- WHO CAN YOU TRUST?

-=Mike

I'd sooner trust Vince McMahon saying he's going to give the Cruiserweight division a serious push before I trusted Rue and Josh's medical opinions.

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Aw crud, I wanted to see Zombie Angle.

 

"Muuuuust... EEEEEat... Braaaaains! Muuuuuust... EEEEEAT.... BRRAAAAAAINNNS!... It's... Truuuuue... IIIIT'SSS ... TRUUUUUUUE"

Vince is in the ring when Zombie Kurt comes out

 

Kurt: MUUUUUUST Eaaaaaat braiiiiiiiiiins....*checks Vince's head*...Noooooooo braiiiiins...must eaaaaaat braiiiins...

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Kurt's alive after that fall?

 

Its not hard to beleive, is it?

 

 

I mean come on!

 

He once won a gold friggin' medal with a broken friggin' neck!

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Kurt's alive after that fall?

 

Its not hard to beleive, is it?

 

 

I mean come on!

 

He once won a gold friggin' medal with a broken friggin' neck!

And he tears his quad every day!

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Gotta love the "severe internal injuries" line.

Well how else are they going to explain the magical pool of blood he laid in?

Probably from the Grade 3 Concussion.

 

They DID say it was the most severe.

 

Course, I'd trust a true medical opinion more.

I don't think you bleed from the head if you have a concussion. Isn't that a cracked skull?

 

Yes, everytime a wrestler blades they crack their skull.

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Guest Quik

I hope this is the start of a new running gag on Smackdown... every week someone tries to kill Kurt Angle. But each time he pops right back up like Robin Spitz from Austin Powers. Imagine the hilarity. Undertaker shoots lightning at Kurt, Kurt just gets up yelling "Ow!" really loudly.

 

"Why won't you die?!"

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Or he continues to get dropped on his head until he's the Eugene of Smackdown. Or put him in one of those mental places like Flair and Linda McMahon.

 

The outrage on this board would be entertainment enough.

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Guest DarthLordOfWrestling
So, where all did that huge puddle blood come from?

Maybe he was bleeding from his mouth. We all know that if you have those dreaded internal injuries, you bleed from your mouth, right?

I don't think the WWE thought about it, they just thought that blood would look more deadly.

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*Taker is fighting Eddie Guerrero for the WWE title*

 

*Taker is about to tombstone Eddie*

 

*BONG*

 

*BONG*

 

*Vincent Price cackles*

"Darkness Falls Across The Land

The Midnite Hour Is Close At Hand

Creatures Crawl In Search Of Blood

To Terrorize Y'awl's Neighbourhood

And Whosoever Shall Be Found

Without The Soul For Getting Down

Must Stand And Face The Hounds Of Hell

And Rot Inside A Corpse's Shell

The Foulest Stench Is In The Air

The Funk Of Forty Thousand Years

And Grizzy Ghouls From Every Tomb

Are Closing In To Seal Your Doom

And Though You Fight To Stay Alive

Your Body Starts To Shiver

For No Mere Mortal Can Resist

The Evil Of The Thriller"

 

*Theme from Thriller*

 

It's Close To Midnight And Something Evil's Lurking In The Dark

Under The Moonlight You See A Sight That Almost Stops Your Heart

You Try To Scream But Terror Takes The Sound Before You Make It

You Start To Freeze As Horror Looks You Right Between The Eyes,

You're Paralyzed

 

Cole: What they damn hell is that?!?

 

Tazz: I dunno Cole, but it doesn't look good for the deadman.

 

*Zombie Angle comes out with a red leather jacket and single glove*

 

Tazz: OH MY GOD!

 

Cole: It's KURT ANGLE! I thought he was DEAD!

 

Tazz: He was dead Cole! We all seen him die!

 

Cole: So who is this, then?!

 

Tazz: Oh my god... it is Kurt Angle... and he's back from the dead!!!

 

*A group of Zombies follow Kurt and dance to the music*

 

That This Is Thriller, Thriller Night

'Cause I Can Thrill You More Than Any Ghost Would Dare To Try

Girl, This Is Thriller, Thriller Night

So Let Me Hold You Tight And Share A Killer, Diller, Chiller

Thriller Here Tonight

 

*Taker, after tombstoning Eddie, turns his attention to Zombie Angle and his legion of the undead*

 

Cole: Oh uh, it looks like the Undertaker may have his hands full.

 

Tazz: Two deadmen about to go at it, only in the WWE.

 

Cole: It looks like Taker isn't a afraid of this Zombie Angle.

 

Tazz: Taker has more guts than brains, that for sure.

 

*Zombie Angle and Gang are about to attack when the music stops*

 

*Zombie Angle looks confused*

 

*Zombie Angle looks at Taker, Taker shrugs*

 

*Zombie Angle looks down in shame and leaves*

 

*Taker, Cole, Tazz and Eddie all breathe a sigh of relief... and then they bukkake Mrs. Jackie*

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Aw crud, I wanted to see Zombie Angle.

 

"Muuuuust... EEEEEat... Braaaaains!  Muuuuuust... EEEEEAT.... BRRAAAAAAINNNS!... It's... Truuuuue... IIIIT'SSS ... TRUUUUUUUE"

Vince is in the ring when Zombie Kurt comes out

 

Kurt: MUUUUUUST Eaaaaaat braiiiiiiiiiins....*checks Vince's head*...Noooooooo braiiiiins...must eaaaaaat braiiiins...

Heh, did you rip that off of the Garfield strip or the Simpson?

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*Realizes mistake*

 

*Feels ashamed*

 

*Questions purpose of continuing this gimmick if spelling is wrong*

 

*Ponders*

 

*Wonders*

 

*Searches deep down inside*

 

*Fixes*

 

*Breathes a sigh of relief*

 

*Bukkakes Miss Jackie*

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Kurt Angle is believed to be dead, and he must let the world think that he is dead, until he can find a way to control the raging spirit that dwells within him... Da Da DAAAAAAA.

"Mr. McMahon, don't make me angry...you wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

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Guest Dynamite Kido
Kurt Angle is believed to be dead, and he must let the world think that he is dead, until he can find a way to control the raging spirit that dwells within him... Da Da DAAAAAAA.

"Mr. McMahon, don't make me angry...you wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

I was thinking.....

 

"Mr. McMahon, don't make me GM...you wouldn't like me when I'm the GM."

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KURT_ANGLE2.JPG

 

*wonders if anyone will Photoshop it to look like Zombie Angle

 

01.jpg

 

"The SmartMarks: We breathe a sigh of relief... then bukkake Miss. Jackie"

 

Somebody Photoshop it in! :lol:

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