JBL Party Animal far worse than JBL Nazi!

[Guest killernerd]

“JBL Party Animal far Worse than JBL Nazi!”

 

 

Hello Smart Marks,

 

JBL recently has been using his well hard earned money at the local bars in New York City. It is a feel known fact that JBL is a big time drinker of the alcoholic beverages dating back to his days in the APA. What JBL has been doing after he gets drunk as caused great concern in the front office of the WWE. Here are some things JBL has done in the last several months at the New York City pubs.

 

1. JBL entered the Mexican midget throwing contest at Slammers bar in New York. Max Mini happened to be one of the little guys taking part in the contest. JBL got a little carried away with the midget throwing and throw Max about 20 feet, which caused him to hit the mechanical bull. Max needed to get his spleen taken out the following week. Max stated he would not sue the WWE if they would hire him on the Spanish announce team. WWE had high hopes to hire Konan in that role but now it looks like their getting a midget instead. Well I guess JBL has now destroyed both the German market and now the Mexican market as it relates to WWE wrestling.

 

2. JBL went out to one of the main enter sections of New York City and started taking his clothes off. JBL than destroyed the stop light by hitting all the lights out with his Texas cow bell and bull rope. JBL than declared himself the Buck Naked Director of Traffic Authority. The cops came and arrested JBL for a night. JBL is now required to serve a hundred hours community service at Mamma May’s soap kitchen. WWE fears the Madison Square Garden fans will now look at JBL has a joke because he now spends all his time serving cold oatmeal to homeless people.

 

3. JBL brought Shannon Moore down to his house in New York City and got Shannon totally trashed by having him drink 20 shots of Canadian Whiskey. JBL than bought Shannon a 2 dollar hooker and Shannon really got taken advantage of by the young mistress. Shannon not only ended up cheating on his wife but he also got a strange STD called “Hyropenia Disease”. JBL had to save the day by taking a pair of sharp blades to Shannon’s ding of ling, which Killer Tim Brookes taught JBL from his days in the Global Wrestling Federation. Many feel JBL had a little too much fun with the beheading and now Shannon can’t have kids because of JBL’s special operation. The big question is can Shannon save his marriage?

 

4. JBL has caused major problems with Rent Cars American, which is the WWE’s choice of renting cars from. JBL had a visit with Ron Simmons, who was their on business to meet with WWE on the possible reformation of the Nation of Domination. JBL and Ron had a little joy ride in their fancy rent a car, which caused all four tires to fall off the car. JBL and Ron got on their limited edition Dukes of Hazard walkie talkies. JBL screamed into the talkies saying “This is Russo B Coaltrain reporting a big 10-4 on a red low rider speeding the highways of route 341. I’m in hot pursuit right now.” JBL happened to hit a speed bump while in excess of 150 miles per hour. All four tires came rolling off the vehicle at speed of lighting. The rent a car agency as already banned WWE from being able to rent from the agency. The fear is that all rent a car places will find out and take similar action. It looks like WWE may be renting from Scotty’s Tricycles and Scooter now to get to the WWE live events. Very few WWE stars can now afford a Taxi because of poor house show attendance, which has made JBL very unpopular with the mid-card of the federation.

 

5. JBL recently came into Wolfindales bar in New York City on a large bull with a pistol in his hand. JBL got a little trigger happy with his gun and shot the gun off in the bar. The bullet hit Missy Hyatt’s silicone breast and silicone juice blinded a bar tender at the scene of the crime. Missy Hyatt claims she will not sue if Vince McMahan gives her a job on RAW managing Maven and Val Venis as the STD Express. Hyatt’s purposed angle would start with a skit airing of a threesome between Venis, Maven, and Hyatt. The next week Maven and Venis would have pink polka dots all over their bodies and would be managed by Hyatt and Kimona Wantalaya. Venis and Maven would trick the WWE Divas that had been voted off the Diva search into having affairs with them. Maven and Venis will say “We know people in high places that can skyrocket your career to the top of the WWE. Why not take a ride on space mountain with the STD’s express to become superstars in the flash of a eye!” All diva will have inappropriate relations with the STD express and they will be shown the following weeks crying because they now have no job with WWE plus they now have pink polka dots all over their pretty faces and bodies. Many in the WWE feel a lawsuit with Missy Hyatt would be much easier because even the WWE bookers feel this angle is to controversial for RAW.

 

Well it looks like JBL has caused the WWE to go to hell for the time being. Well the WWE bigwigs be able to fix the various problems JBL has caused with the company? Only time will tell. Hope to chat later and have a good weekend!

 

yours truly,

 

Killer Nerd

[Lt. Al Giardello 0]

Ha ha, very funny.

[NYU 0]

Oh, this is a joke.

 

I get jokes.

[JN News 0]

WTF?

Edited August 14, 2004 by JN News

[Guest Dazed]

What the fuck is this? People... redeem this thread.

[JN News 0]

I don't see anything funny about what that guy said.

[Sass 0]

Did Mike Lano register here or something?

[JN News 0]

That's a good question.

[Lord of The Curry 0]

What the fuck is this? People... redeem this thread.

Why is this thread still open?

[BHK 0]

What the fuck is this? People... redeem this thread.

*attempts to think of way to save thread* nope. can't do it. Sorry Nik.

[Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye 0]

Well, he tried. That should count for something.

[Guest Dazed]