Lockdown Matches that didn't win

[super_tigris 0]

The SWF cameras come back to ringside, an electric feeling pulsing through the audience as the cage dangles and Funyon enters the ring. The crowd cheers as Pete and King welcome viewers back.

 

“The main event is scheduled to get under way,” relays Pete, fans cheering loudly behind him, emphasizing the point, “Up and comer Michael Cross is getting his big break tonight against Landon Maddix, but there’s one giant obstacle in his way – the unforgiving confines of a steel cage!”

 

“Maddix,” sniggers King unenthusiastically towards the mention of Landon’s name, “If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times; the guy is a joke!”

 

“That may be so,” remarks Pete, “But tonight, that cage is going to pit experience against inexperience, and as much as everyone wants to see Michael Cross make it out alive, I just don’t know how much luck he can scrape up against someone who can match his speed and outwrestle him, he’s got no where to run to unless he can escape those 15 foot high gates of Hell!”

 

Funyon cuts the banter off Longdogger and the Suicide King off, the crowd simmering like a boiling put of water in anticipation for the upcoming match.

 

“The following match is your MAIN EVENT,” bellows Funyon triumphantly into the mic, “And it is scheduled to be a STEEL CAGE MATCH! Introducing first, he is the SUICIDE MACHINE, MY-CHULE CUROOOOOOOOSS!”

 

At the sound of Funyon’s voice, the lights begin to flicker into complete darkness as daunting sets of red flashes flicker on near the top of the entrance ramp, setting the grim atmosphere for “Omerta” by Lamb of God, which cuts in slowly with scratchy audio.

 

“Whoever appeals to the law against his fellow man is either a fool or a coward; whoever cannot take care of himself without that law is both,” echoes the voice, freezing the tips of the ears of everyone within hearing distance of the cold and emotionless voice, “For a wounded man shall say to his assailant, ‘If I live, I will kill you. If I die, you are forgiven.’ Such is the rule of Honor.”

 

The music explodes into a fury of red lighting that engulfs the arena in a spectacle unlike anything of this world – almost as if the gates of Hell have been opened within the arena. The vocals kick in and the lighting shifts into an inferno of strobes, flaring the cameras as they swing to the entrance way catching a glimpse of a hooded Michael Cross who stands with his head hanging, hidden beneath a hood. The crowd flashes their cameras in excitement as the undefeated Michael Cross moves forward, looking like a lost bird without his partner Akira Kaibatsu or his manager Mr. Kobe at his side.

 

“For those just tuning in,” adds Pete, “Michael Cross has vowed to take the challenge of Landon Maddix alone; he has enlisted his own help for tonight’s contest. Tonight, Michael Cross is looking to show the whole world that he has exactly what it takes to headline any show in any company.”

 

Cross struts down the ramp with anger, his steps pressed and forced as the crowd taps his back and shoulders, receiving not even the slightest response from the focused contender. He pauses, and looks to the left and the right, whipping his hood from his head, and then proceeding to walk to the steps, stomping up them quickly and pausing on the apron. He wipes his feet quickly, scraping them across the canvas as he creeps under the third rope entering the ring. The music fades away as he goes to his corner and begins his warm up routine.

 

"PREPARE...FOR...LANDON!"

 

...WAAAAAHHHHH...

 

*DUM DUM*

 

The post-opening part of "Megalomaniac" by Incubus hits, as from behind the curtain steps Landon Maddix, stopping at the top of the ramp and thrusting his hands out to his side to boos. More serious now, Landon will keep posturing to a minimum and simply walks down the ramp on the way to the ring.

 

“LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, PLEASE WELCOME, LAAAAAANDON MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDIX!”

 

Landon leaps to the apron, looking out at the crowd. Again, serious and stuff, he'll enter the ring and dispose of his ring jacket before going through pre-match warm-ups.

 

As Funyon leaves the ring the cage departs from the ceiling, lowering down and trapping Landon Maddix and Michael Cross together between the confines of its 15-foot high walls of steel. The referee steps in as both Maddix and Cross stare each other down. Referee Ced Ordonez confronts both men, and on their signal the bell tolls, condemning the two men now to each other.

 

“I know you’ve been waiting for this all night, King,” exclaims Pete reminding the audience world wide of King’s distaste for Landon Maddix, “The test for new comer Michael Cross comes in the form of Maddix; age isn’t a factor, though, folks. Both Landon and Cross are the same age.”

 

Maddix looks around making himself aware of his surroundings, and then guns for the cage wall. Cross isn’t far behind, chasing down Maddix and delivering a blow to his back. Maddix fails to flinch and delivers a nasty elbow strike to the chest of Cross, almost as if he had set it up, sending Cross stumbling back and away from the cage wall into the center of the ring.

 

“A brilliant move by Maddix,” Pete proclaims with interest, “You can hate him, but he’s always thinking, and he’s got the advantage on the less experienced Mike Cross!”

 

Maddix charges from the corner to the center of the ring, using his speed to swing his legs up and over the nearly doubled over Cross, swinging around and dropping the Suicide Machine into a crossface, much to the crowds dismay. Cross powers through the early hold, but Maddix is all over the situation like white on rice, letting the arm go and moving to the back, locking in a rear naked choke.

 

“Maddix’s improved ground skills have got the high risk offense and defense of Michael Cross neutralized early,” describes Pete who is interrupted almost immediately by King.

 

“Maddix couldn’t wrestle worth shit on the mat,” King bludgeons at Maddix with deep felt remarks, “Give Cross 5 minutes, and this match will be done.”

 

Maddix has seceded the choke and places a knee to the back of Cross, who struggles under the muscle of Landon. Cross’ back and neck wrench as Landon cranks his jaw into the air, torturing the upper-body muscles which begin to loosen. Despite Landon’s best attempts, Cross powers through, turning his body and grappling a hold of the leg which was previously pressed into Mike’s back. Landon elevates his body and then slides his weight outward thrusting Cross downward and back into the familiar position on his belly. Maddix turns and resumes control of Mike’s back, going back to work on the muscles, again pressing the knee to his back and pulling the jaw upward.

 

“Once again,” describes Pete, “Maddix has snared Mike, leaving him in a compromising position that may render his back an open target throughout this match.”

 

Cross again powers through, his high tolerance for pain allowing him to work quickly under the pressure of the hold, grabbing a leg on Maddix and attempting for another take down. Maddix sprawls again, but Cross swiftly slides out of the way allowing Maddix to flop to his belly. Landon looks befuddled and embarrassed as Cross stands back to his feet triumphantly, no taunting needed, as the crowd cheers Cross on.

 

“Landon looked like a complete fool;” shouts King, “As I said, the guy can’t work to save his life on the mat!”

 

“I don’t know about that,” rebuts Pete intelligently, “But Michael Cross is standing, and I don’t know how well of a thought out plan that is against Landon, a very accomplished striker, even at one point learning from a former UFC fighter.”

 

Cross moves away from Landon, who turns back to his feet and corners Cross, back against the cage. Mike looks for a way out but Landon is all over him once again, pressing his back up against the cage. Landon tees off with several elbows in response to Cross’ escape from Landon’s hold, viciously digging his forearm into Mike with each shot. Cross looks overwhelmed as Maddix grabs his arm and prepares to whip him across the ring. He drags Mike and then drops him down to his belly with a drop toe hold and again resumes position on his back, this time grabbing his ankles and locking them around his own ankle. Landon smiles and twiddles his hair out of his face and then thrusts back, bridging and taking hold of Cross’ chin. He bridges his body and then turns onto his stomach, extending Mike’s spine into his chest and stretching out all of the neck and back muscles he can. Cross is in agonizing pain, but quickly wipes any emotion from his face and uses the awkward position to his favor, rolling over and powering from the hold.

 

“Landon is having trouble keeping Cross on the ground” exclaims Pete enthusiastically, “The experienced ground game would favor him in any other match but this – Cross is tolerating all of the holds that Maddix can throw at him and he’s still standing. Effective ground game, yes, but if Maddix can’t keep this kid down, how does he expect to scale the cage?”

 

Cross again stands to his feet in rebel fashion as Landon looks up in dismay, looking as if he’s contemplating and second guessing his game plan. He gets to his feet as Cross steps at him, tying him up in a clutch. Landon tries to power through Cross, but isn’t able to break the firm stance. Cross pushes Landon back stepping right into yet another drop toe hold. However, Cross scouts it well and steps right over it leaving Maddix wide open for a boot that sends him rolling away and back up to his feet, caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Cross charges Landon but is countered and sent flying into the cage, his face mashing the mesh, unexpectedly countered by Maddix’s unanticipated speed.

 

“Cross’ face can’t take many of those shots to that unforgiving steel,” relays Pete sympathetically, “The skin wasn’t meant to take that kind of punishment!”

 

Cross stumbles around to the center of the ring as Maddix approaches steadily behind him, stalking his back and looking to strike at the appropriate moment. Just as Cross turns, Maddix uses his swinging momentum to grab around his neck, pulling Cross down for a Complete Shot. Maddix rolls through placing his knee directly over the head of Cross, pressing his skull to the mat viciously, retracting it up and into the air, only to drop it yet again. The crowd flinches for the Suicide Machine as Maddix appropriately goes back to work on the back, placing both knees now into the curvature of the spine and pulling Cross up and over for a Bow and Arrow lock.

 

“Maddix is back at it,” exclaims Longdogger with a slight interest, “Again, he pursues the effort to ground his stronger and more conditioned opponent. This might not be the best route for Maddix to continue to walk.”

 

Mike rolls through with power yet again, Maddix quickly following him back to his feet looking twice as frustrated as before.

 

“Maddix with yet ANOTHER failed submission hold on Cross’ back,” describes Pete, hinting at the frustration now clearly brewing in Maddix’s face.

 

“Cross is too conditioned and strong to keep down,” proclaims King, making some sense, “This is one of the worst game plans I’ve seen in quite a while!”

 

Landon stares down Cross and shoots at his legs leaving Mike to sprawl, inevitably failing. Again, Landon has Cross down and takes the role of back position. He slaps Cross repeatedly in the back of the head as a taunting mechanism and then drags his neck into an arch with a vicious looking Land of Nod. Cross convulses to his back, Landon clutching at him and clinging like a piece of gum to the bottom of a shoe. Mike fidgets and then pauses. He calms and then drives a nasty elbow back into the side of Maddix who is knocked short of breath before he can even apply the hold correctly, forcing Maddix to relinquish the clutch and sending him stumbling back to his feet with a look of distaste as Cross follows behind him quickly.

 

“Maddix just attempted his finishing hold in frustration,” Pete now informs the viewers at home, “Far too early, far too risky, and very little pay off. A blunder of sorts from Landon Maddix! He can breath a sigh of relief, he’s lucky his opponent is an inexperienced wrestler on the mat, or you can bet the farm Landon would’ve stumbled head first into something dangerous!”

 

Cross fires at Maddix who has strutted over to the corner in frustration, kicking the ropes and turning just in time to see him charging like a train. Maddix responds just in time sending Cross up and into the garter that maintains the cage, crushing his forehead which sends him back down to the mat. Maddix flips his hair and looks down at the Suicide Machine who just crashed and burned, fully acknowledging the pain as he squints, a tiny trickle of blood omitting from a cut just under his hairline.

 

“Cross has an opening on his forehead,” Pete extends his voice in sympathy; “This is going to swing the match into Maddix’s favor, no doubt. Bloodshed will weaken Cross’ speed and cloud his vision.”

 

“NO,” demands King, attempting to change the scene with a single shout, “This can’t happen. No, it won’t make any difference!”

 

In the ring, Maddix snatches Cross from the mat now lifting him to his feet with a slow empathetic lift. He looks at Cross and the pushes him back to the mat cockily, stalking over the fallen body of Mike who edges back to the center of the ring slowly. Maddix again lifts Cross up, this time violently snapping his body to his feet as he punches away to the top of Mike’s head in an attempt to further open the cut as blood drizzles down in thicker streams, coloring Landon’s taped wrists. Cross winces in pain as Maddix kneels over him delivering more punches and widening the cut, his lack of regard almost typical, yet viciously disturbing.

 

“This might just give Maddix the correct edge to take the mat game to a whole new level,” exclaims Pete emotionless, “The blood might allow Landon to get the appropriate advantage to make his mat game far more effective than before!”

 

Maddix stands back up and kicks Cross over to his stomach, rolling him almost. He ducks down and then resumes control of Mike’s back, again trying to effectively make the back a target in this match with constant submissions. He applies a knee to the back and digs it in, pressing the muscles down and then stretching it, sending deep, shocking pain down Mike’s back. He puts his other knee down harshly and rips upward on Mike’s chin, stretching the neck and the back as the camera focuses in on the Suicide Machine’s face, blood flowing fluidly out the cut with the applied pressure from Landon. Cross lets out a slight howl as he attempts to slide away from Maddix, but to no avail. Landon quickly attempts to switch to the Bow and Arrow hold, giving Cross the chance to roll away. Landon barrels to his feet angrily as Cross uses the corner to drag himself back up, the blood inching down his skin and into his right eye.

 

“That cut is definitely effecting Mike at this point,” Pete groans at the scene in disgust, “That blood is going to blur Mike’s vision, regardless of whether the sight and taste of Mike’s own flesh and blood sends him into shock or not.”

 

“Yeah, right,” King pipes in sarcastically, looking to butcher Maddix yet again, “I can see Maddix freaking out; the guy isn’t anything more than a pussy! If Cross cuts him open on that steel, Maddix can all but kiss this match goodbye.”

 

Maddix looks frustrated as Cross, despite being bloody and weary, has once again managed to inexplicably escape Maddix’s submission maneuvers. A look of desperation graces the face of Maddix, who presses Cross into the corner and lifts him up, seating him atop the ropes.

 

“Could this be,” questions Pete as Maddix follows Cross up to the top rope, “Maddix appears to be going high risk – it’s make or break time for La Cucaracha!”

 

Landon stands and taunts to the crowd in an attempt to make them forget that he has yet to keep his inexperienced adversary down throughout the opening of this match. He stands at the top and blows an ignorant kiss to the crowd before jumping and sitting on Cross’ shoulders looking for a huricanrana off the top. Landon stretches his body downward in an attempt to drag Cross with him but is met with strength, Cross clutching at Maddix who hangs now hovering over the canvas. Cross lets him hang for a moment before dragging him back up into a powerbomb position, standing up now like a mummy on the second rope. Maddix clutches at the cage wall desperately attempting to fight Cross off who shakes and then drops, pulling Landon down, driving his head straight into the top buckle and sending him back first down to the mat stunned. The crowd pops loudly as Cross sits folded near the corner resting and whipping the blood from his face, smearing lines of red over his skin.

 

“OH,” shouts King, “YES, YES! TAKE THAT YOU COCKROACH!”

 

“A magnificent counter by Cross,” exclaims Longdogger Pete in awe, “There’s no other way to put it, Landon played right into Cross’ specialty and left himself open for disaster because of it. The failed mat work has led to a BIG swing, folks, Cross is forcing Maddix to take to the air and make some risks that have just broken the lead he had!”

 

Cross pulls himself back up, now replenished and back to standing more normally as Landon crawls away from him to the center of the ring. The crowd chants Mike’s name getting behind him, wanting him to prevail in his big break as Landon looks caught off guard, bewildered and confused at how to stop Cross in the confines of a cage that he has to escape; no easy task, demanding that he can keep Cross down.

 

“Landon looks stunned, he looks absolutely rocked out there,” exclaims Pete.

 

“His most ‘Experienced Efforts’ aren’t good enough,” proclaims King enthusiastically against Landon Maddix at all costs, “What did I tell you, what did I tell you?”

 

Cross looks to the cage wall and immediately begins to scale the wall as Maddix sulks back to his feet, now noticing that Cross is more than half way up the wall.

 

“Cross is making a quick effort to catch Landon off guard,” Pete shouts climactically, “Thus far it’s worked, and his inexperience has allowed Maddix to make some mistakes underestimating his conditioning and strength!”

 

“C’mon,” demands King, “Get out of there, hurry!”

 

STEP…even closer to the top now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

STEP…yet closer, inching away the length between him and escape as Landon makes his way to the wall.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Step…slowly.

STEP…Maddix just behind him.

 

“Maddix is just behind Cross, who is one clean step from the top!” Pete shouts in excitement.

 

Maddix quickly makes up time, slowing Mike down with several forearms that slap the skin of Mike, notching him down a step and bringing them to about the same level. Maddix slaps at Cross who lets one hand go on the cage, his back turning. He brings the hand back allowing Maddix to climb up and over onto his back, gaining leverage over Cross. He whips and arm around the neck, constricting Cross in his Land of Nod, as he clutches the cage desperately trying to hang on. The crowd loses its heat and Landon gains even more leverage over Cross, letting the hold go having done the damage he wanted.

 

“Maddix is SO close,” Pete yells as the fans stand, cameras flashing, “This one is going to be a photo fin…NO WAIT!”

 

Maddix drops down and grabs a hold of Cross’ shoulders loading his knees into his back and dropping down in an attempt to drag Mike off the cage for a Mount Crushmore. The crowd pops as Maddix falls back, but drops, losing his hold on Mike’s shoulders and landing awkwardly in a nasty drop, his legs tangling in the ropes and rolling him out towards the center of the ring.

 

“MIKE IS CLOSE,” Pete is yelling louder now, his voice booming and matching the crowd’s excitement, “There’s no one there, he’s all alone!”

 

The Suicide Machine isn’t thinking the same way, as he looks back at Maddix who begins to climb stubbornly back to his feet, frustrated beyond belief. Cross steps down and balances on the third rope, turns, and leaps from it and over Maddix kneeling in the ring. He sticks his feet out, looking for a double stomp, but Maddix manages to evade disaster, rolling away as Cross lands on his feet.

 

“A stupid mistake,” King and the crowd quiet down, “Cross could’ve had this match done!”

 

“I’m not so sure it was as stupid as it looked,” Pete fires back informatively, “Maddix wasn’t going to be down for long, he took a small fall, and in the long run, Cross prevented himself from taking a BIG risk and crashing and rather, went for the knockout blow. If he had connected, the win would’ve probably been picked up. He missed, but I’m not certain that wasn’t the smartest move.”

 

Cross turns and is lashed in the face with a superkick that sends him stumbling away from Maddix towards the cage wall, the kick backed by little leverage giving off no more then a mosquito bite of a strike at best. Cross turns back around and is met with a number of elbows from Maddix who now whips Mike across the ring. Mike hits the parallel ropes and rebounds towards Maddix who swings Mike up and over, attempting to throw him back first into the cage. Mike’s legs hit the ropes and spring back around acrobatically, Maddix wasting no time playing catch up by chopping Mike’s chest in response almost immediately. Again he thrusts Mike back against the ropes and throws him across the ring, this time on the rebound connecting with his original intention, Mike’s back thrashing the metal wildly as he collapses down between the wall and the ropes.

 

“Landon’s persistence paid off,” Pete lays out the truth in a lecturing tone, “It failed miserably earlier, but he caught Mike asleep at the wheel, sending him CRASHING into that wall!”

 

Cross rolls under the ropes, and back into the ring as Maddix sways his hair from his face, smiling as he looks down at Cross who sits up and rolls to his stomach, kneeling as Landon looks towards the ropes. Maddix charges towards them as Cross gathers his footing, maintaining a stable stance. Using his momentum, Landon hits the second rope, twists, and rolls his body across the ring towards Mike Cross. Cross quickly responds and catches Maddix’s attempt mid-flight, swatting him out of the air with a thudding clothesline that levels Maddix back down to the mat, shot down yet again.

 

“Maddix has been forced to assume the role he has denounced,” Pete covers Landon’s history as a spot wrestler, describing how JJ Johnson and Jay Hawke had removed that dangerous style from him and replaced a more stable striking and ground game, “But what can he do; his mat work hasn’t stopped Mike, and it certainly won’t keep him down long enough to allow him to escape these walls!”

 

“Pathetic,” mutters King.

 

Maddix’s fall leaves him in a seated position after his head collided with the mat almost full force, leaving him somewhat stunned and providing a bit of breathing room for Michael Cross, whose cut has refused to dry out, the blood still giving his face a shiny and unnatural luster of red.

 

“Mike needs to capitalize on this opening,” Pete goes back to lecturing the inexperience that has plagued the match for Mike thus far, while allowing him also to remain in it; somewhat of a double bladed sword, “He has yet to enter, he’s got his foot in there, but he needs every mistake to turn in to an opportunity to end this match!”

 

Mike stands now, turning to his opponent who is also rising back to his feet. The crowd claps as both men turn and begin exchanging rights and lefts. Maddix works in several nasty blows that catch Cross off guard, allowing Landon to gain a quick upper hand. As Mike comes back rearing back into the exchange, Maddix uses his momentum to send him toppling over, driven to the mat with a nice looking exploder suplex. The crowd sighs, but Cross is already turning in an attempt to get back to his feet, a second wind clearly pushing his body as Landon looks stunned, pulling Cross over with a quick arm drag that offers no solution, Cross back to his feet yet again.

 

“Maddix is throwing just about everything at this kid,” Pete exclaims connecting to Cross and admiring his tenacity, “You can’t help but hope for this kid, you can’t help but admire this kids guts! He might have all the inexperience in the world, but all the heart and will to win is there, he just needs to channel it!”

 

Cross pushes Maddix back, taking control for the first time as Maddix lunges forward grappling him in a quick attempt to regain the power. Cross ducks under the tie up attempt and grabs a hold of back position, Maddix looking uneasy and outwrestled for the first time all match – Cross has finally stepped up to the plate. Mike hooks the arms up and the air and locks his hands over the neck of La Cucaracha, waiting now as the crowd stands and cheers loudly.

 

“HE’S GOT IT; THIS IS IT,” King shouts, “YES, TO HELL WITH MADDIX!”

 

“The Devil is in reach,” Pete exclaims loudly, “His snare has got Maddix!”

 

Cross lifts, but as he looks to drop back, Maddix breaks the hold and turns the tables on Cross, garnering the back position now.

 

“So close,” King sighs, the wind in his sails taken away by Maddix’s quick and impressive counter, clearly showing his experience over his opponent.

 

“Cross was so close,” Pete cools down, his and the crowd’s hearts racing for the rookie, “So very, very close. A minor error allowed Maddix to break the hold and swap positions!”

 

Maddix pushes Cross outward and stumbling forward into the ropes, catching him on the rebound hooking in a half nelson and a chickenwing. The crowd sighs a heavy breath of air as Maddix lifts Cross up and over for his signature Half & Half suplex, however, Cross rolls through it, landing on his feet and breaking the hold that Landon has. Landon stumbles back up to his feet and backs right into Cross who immediately snaps in a full-nelson, the crowd popping incredibly loud in response as Cross folds backward attempting to drop Landon on his neck for his finisher. Landon drops to his BUTT bringing Cross’ chin down with him, crushing his throat as he stands back up, letting the hold go. Landon climbs back to his feet and snap mares Mike over and onto his BUTT.

 

“AGAIN,” King exclaims loudly and disappointed, “AGAIN HE MISSED IT!”

 

“LOOK OUT,” Longdogger Pete yells loudly.

 

In the ring, Maddix charges at Cross who is kneeling. He steps up onto Cross’ knee and throws all of his weight in the form of a knee right square in the nose of Mike who falls back and rolls to his stomach, the crowd shocked as Maddix stands and taunts them, the crowd booing him loudly.

 

“NO,” King and Pete yell together, King now overpowering Pete’s voice, “Damn you, Landon, DAMN YOU!”

 

“That’s gotta be it,” Pete looks on at Cross whose blood has stained the mat now, his body lying motionless as Maddix looks to the cage wall.

 

 

 

 

 

STEP…the crowd sighs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

STEP…Maddix is getting closer, but taking his time as the crowd begins to boo unanimously.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

STEP…Landon is near the top now, Ced looking up at him and then back at Cross.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

STEP…Landon crawls, his body atop the cage, peeking his way over it and stepping to the outside of the wall.

 

 

The crowd boos loudly as Maddix raises an arm in salute to them, nearly stepping off. He turns and jumps, but as he does so, his hair pulls and he flails his legs, the camera looking up to catch a glimpse of Michael Cross snatching two handfuls of blonde hair and pulling Maddix as his legs struggle to catch back on the cage. The crowd goes nuts as a bloody Cross begins yanking and pulling Landon up and back to the top of the cage, crawling up alongside him as they perch themselves atop the 15 foot structure.

 

“YES,” King immediately wakes up a glimmer of hope, “Yes!”

 

“Cross has got Maddix right where he wants him,” Pete’s voice prickles the neck of all the fans as the two duel it out atop the cage, the underdog and the heavily disliked favorite, “Right now, it’s all about high risk! This is Cross’ only hope, this is it folks!”

 

Cross swings at Maddix, but is caught with several overpowering and key shots that nearly send him off the cage, hugging it tightly to remain alive in the match. Maddix wearily stands, as Cross follows, the two men towering over the audience as cameras flash rapid fire. Maddix manages to catch Cross with a devastating haymaker the sends him keeling over. Maddix pulls Mike’s head between his legs and hooks his arms.

 

“NO,” Pete yells, “Not from there, there’s no way! NO! He’s attempting the Pepsi Max Plunge OFF THE CAGE!”

 

The crowd does away with the booing, their loud cheers sending shivers throughout the arena as Cross and Maddix stand atop the cage. Cross fights it off and drops down to his belly, hugging the cage as Maddix boots him, sending him back over the edge and into the ring. He continues booting him, Cross struggling to hang and stay alive in the match as the crowd’s cheers get louder and louder. Cross dangles, and as Maddix delivers the boot, he nearly falls, but manages to hang on. Maddix again delivers a long, powerful kick, but Cross grabs it just before it can connect, throwing Maddix off balance and sending him falling to his BUTT on the lip of the top of the cage. Cross grabs his legs and drags Maddix away from the top as he scrambles to gain position, but to no avail as Cross sets him atop his shoulders in an electric chair position. The crowd goes absolutely nuts as Cross lays Maddix over his shoulders and drops him off the top rope for the Desperation ’28, cameras flickering in every direction as the ring shakes thunderously, Maddix’s body bouncing around, finally laying to rest.

 

“THAT’S GOTTA BE IT,” Pete and King begin yelling, chaos ensuing as the fans erupt, “A desperate situation, a great time to hit the Desperation ’28!”

 

Cross begins moving as Maddix lies motionless in the center of the ring, Ced looking on amazed. Cross drags himself to his feet and steps up to the wall, climbing it after scaling to the top rope. The crowd is going nuts as the underdog makes his way up to the top of the cage, cameras going off everywhere. He reaches the top triumphantly and edges over the top, jumping down as Maddix begins making movement in the ring. Funyon interrupts the crowd, who ignore him, hitting the exhausted Mike Cross’ shoulder and cheering loudly.

 

“LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, YOU’RE WINNNNNNNER,” Funyon bellows, “MICHAEL CROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSS!!!!!”

 

“He did it, he overcame the odds,” Pete loudly exclaims, overly happy for the rookie, “He beat the odds, and the Vegas deal makers are having a heart attack! He forced Landon back into a style that caused him to crash, he maintained composure against his ground work, and overcame every obstacle Landon could throw at him in that cage!”

 

Cross leaves through the crowd as Omerta by Lamb of God closes out the show, the crowds loud cheers fading as the screen goes black, the last image of that of a tired and sweaty, as well as frustrated, Landon Maddix, pulling himself to the cage and looking over to the exiting Cross in absolute rage.

[Bruce Blank 0]

Well this lost, shame really since I think it's got a lot of things going for it like how it's NOT your standard Tag-Team match story like well 95% of the regular rules tag matches I've read since joining

 

It made Bruce / IL actually seem like a BIG deal and I thought it handled Coyote/LDP heading for an actual match in a creative way.

 

Obviously I was alone in thinking that Oh well that's life innit?

 

Note: Mike had no part in this, the suckage is purely my own.

 

=======================================

 

“The following tag-team match is part of the Lethal Lottery Tournament” Funyon says we return to the ring “Introducing first from Easton, Pensylvania…”

 

That’s all Funyon has to say before the crowd goes nuts and starts to chant for Insane Luchador, once “Man in a Box” kicks in the crowd response grows tenfold.

 

*FWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHH!!*

*FWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHH!!*

*FWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHH!!*

*FWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHH!!*

*FWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHH!!*

 

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!

 

Insane Luchador comes out from the back sprinting to the ring as he looks both fired up and pissed off mixed into one 201 pound frame as he holds his Lighttube sword up in the air.

 

“You can tell Rickmen has been looking forward to this match since Storm, he wants a chance to get his hands on Bruce” Hardy states as IL starts to do a circle around the ring high fiving everyone who has a sign that puts down Bruce.

 

“Where the hell did you come from?” King says leaping a good foot into the air as he notices that Ben Hardy has taken the position next to him instead of Longdogger Pete.

 

“Well… erm … they thought it was best if Pete wasn’t out here for this match” Hardy starts to explain that the SWF felt that maybe it wasn’t a good idea to have Longdogger Pete and Kevin Coyote in the vicinity of each other right now.

 

“So I’m stuck with you? Congratulations you’ve done the impossible” King says

 

“What?”

 

“You’ve made me miss Pete” King states with a grin.

 

As IL makes his around the outside of the ring a figure in red and black crawls out from under the ring behind him with a folding chair in his hand.

 

“Is that Wayne Blank?” King asks without really expecting an answer.

 

Luchador hasn’t seen Wayne and is thus taken totally off guard by the chairshot to the back from the younger Blank brother. The impact of the seat of the chair makes IL drop his lighttube sword on the ground.

 

*THWACK!*

 

Bruce quickly comes running to the ring from backstage to join in the attack. Wayne has enough time to strike Luchador in the head with the chair two times more before Bruce makes it down the ramp and over to where the action is.

 

“He hid under the ring all night just to attack Insane Luchador?” Ben asks in disbelief.

 

“Yep he’s THAT dedicated” King says admiring Wayne’s devotion to his craft.

 

Bruce quickly scoops up the dazed Luchador and puts him over his shoulder facing forward. With a good grip on his opponent / victim Bruce runs forward and rams Andrew Rickmen’s face into the ringpost with a sickening thud.

 

*CRACK!!*

 

After backing up a couple of steps Bruce ramps IL face first into the ring post again busting him wide open on impact. The crowd watches on in horror as Bruce twists his body and swings the side of IL's head into the ringpost for a third time.

 

*CLANG!!*

 

“Oh my god!! Insane Luchador is dead!!” Hardy yells out without realizing just how tasteless that remark is when it comes to IL.

 

Wayne raises the chair as Bruce yells something to him, then as Bruce tosses Luchador’s limp body forward Wayne swings the chair and DRILLS Insane Luchador in the head with it.

 

*WHACK!!*

 

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

 

Bruce can’t help but smile as he looks down at IL who’s out cold. When the EMT crew appears on the ramp it’s decided to quickly cut to a commercial break while the mayhem in the ring is cleared up.

 

*** Commercial Break ***

 

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(“Stuff” is a trademark of Frost Inc.)

 

*** End of Commercial Break 5 minutes later ***

 

We return to the ring with Bruce in his team’s corner as he jaws with fans at ringside over what just went down. During the commercial break both Amy Stephens and Kevin Coyote have made their way to the ring and the two of them look like they’re ready to lock up.

 

“Welcome back fans” Ben starts out “During the commercial break the EMTs took Allan Rickmen to the back to treat him for his injuries and it looks like Coyote will have to wrestle on his own”

 

“Luchador can usually take quite a beating but the Blank boys caught him totally off guard without a chance to protect himself – and he paid the price. If Coyote was smart he would have just stayed in the back and let Bruce and Amy win by default – but just like his old man he’s too stubborn to do something like that” King explains

 

“One of the very few things they have in common” Ben adds.

 

*DING*DING*DING*

 

To say that Kevin looks pissed off is an understatement, he’s absolutely disgusted with the whole 2 on 1 situation as Amy starts to circle opponent. Kevin just stands there, hands planted on his hips, staring at Amy without moving a muscle as she waits for the right time to attack.

 

LONGDOGGER!! LONGDOGGER!! LONGDOGGER!!

 

“He’s not here!” King says annoyed that fans chant for someone not even in the arena, that’s like chanting USA in a match between a Canadian and a guy from Japan.

 

“It’s called “fan support” King, you may not recognize it since you haven’t ever received it” Ben says actually getting a shot in at the King.

 

At first the chant doesn’t phase Kevin but as it goes on he shakes his head in disgust and raises the “one finger salute” to the crowd. That’s the opening Amy was looking for, she races in the moment Kevin takes his attention away from her, but it seems that it was just a ploy as Coyote’s left hand swiftly and with force clips Amy on the jaw.

 

*POW!*

 

The blow takes Amy totally by surprise and drops her straight on her back as Kevin scores the first blow of the match. Being quick to follow up on the surprise blow Kevin drops to his knees and lands a barrage of gut shots to Amy while she’s still on the ground.

 

“Coyote has his work cut out for him tonight if he’s going to survive against 2 opponents, he really needs to keep Amy away from Bruce and essentially turn it into a 1 on 1 match” King says providing his trademark “amazing insight”

 

“That’s what a smart, seasoned pro would do” Ben agrees

 

“You saying Kevin isn’t smart?”

 

“I’m saying he’s a rookie King, I’m saying that he wasn’t prepared for a 2 on 1 match tonight” Ben replies making a good point for once in his career.

 

When Amy sits up Coyote quickly takes her down once more with a low flying clothesline that Kevin rolls through and onto his knees. With one hand holding on to Amy’s hair Coyote quickly sends a barrage of blows to the head and neck of the Punk Rock Princess.

 

“He’s going to make Amy regret cheating her way to a win on Storm” King says

 

“She didn’t cheat King”

 

“Oh don’t even try that! I was there, I clearly saw her kick Coyote in the Fallopian tubes” King states revealing that he is indeed the master of anatomy.

 

Coyote keeps his opponent grounded with a couple of more blows to the head before he gets back up to his feet. Kevin gets in position and then aims the point of his elbow straight at Amy’s face and drops forward.

 

“NOTHING BUT CANVAS!!” Ben yells out as Amy manages to roll about 5 inches to the right and thus avoid the elbow to the face.

 

Bruce stretches his arm out as far as it can go as Amy slowly starts to crawl over towards her corner hoping to tag out. At first Coyote is focused on his hurt elbow but when he sees that Amy is close to tagging out he tries his best to ignore the pain and grabs Amy by her pink and black Van to stop her progress.

 

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

 

Coyote manages to stop Amy from tagging out and drags her towards the center of the ring by the feet. Amy flips over on her back and then kicks upwards hard striking Kevin on the jaw with her foot. Stephens gets back to her feet and scowls at Coyote as she looks like she’s FED UP with the whole thing and lets loose with a headbutt.

 

*BONK!*

 

The Nottingham Lager Lass quickly fires off another couple of headbutts that sends Coyote into the ropes. When Coyote staggers back out from the ropes Amy quickly takes him down with a Thesz press and then a series of punches to the side of the head of her rookie opponent.

 

Let’s go A-my!! *clap*clap*clap*

 

After landing 7-8 punches in succession Amy gets up and then looks over at Bruce who’s calling for a tag. The crowd may not want a tag but it seems that Amy is more willing than the crowd as she walks over towards Bruce. But before she can get a tag in Coyote demonstrates just how tough he is by getting to his feet and then kicking Amy in the lower back.

 

“OH RIGHT IN THE OVARIES!! That’s like a low blow on guys!” Ben says as if he needed to explain what the ovaries are.

 

Amy clutches her back in sheer agony as Coyote just grins and struts.

 

“That’s right Kevin, take it to her like she was a man!” King shouts as Kevin runs towards his opponent.

 

Amy hopes to catch Kevin mid attack with a kick to the mid section but Coyote shows instincts way beyond his rookie experience and manages to trap her foot in mid air. Amy jumps a few times on one leg as she balances and tries to hit Kevin but not being able to connect. Then she jumps up in the air and tries to kick Coyote with her other leg, but once again Coyote anticipates the move and grabs her OTHER foot as well dropping her face first straight to the mat.

 

“LONGDOGGER DENIAL!!” Hardy bellows out as he’s surprise by Coyote’s use of the move.

 

“It’s Coyote’s Denial now, he did it much better than Pete ever could”

 

The move drives Amy face first into the mat without her being able to put up her hands for protection. Kevin laughs as he taps the side of his head, then suddenly he flips backwards over the top rope to the floor and walks over to where King and Ben are sitting.

 

“HE CALLED YOU AN ASSHOLE!!” King states as he points at Ben

 

“I guess my dear old “Daddy” isn’t here?” Kevin says as he gets up in Ben’s face “So why don’t you pass this one on to him!”

 

And with that Kevin slaps Hardy across the face with enough force to knock the temporary commentator off his chair and to the floor.

 

LONGDOGGER!! LONGDOGGER!! LONGDOGGER!!

 

“BWAAAAAAAAAAAA HA, HA, HA, HA, HA! Kevin – you’re my new hero” King says as he high fives Coyote in a sign of total impartiality.

 

Coyote rolls back in the ring at the moment where Amy finally gets back to her feet and groggily looks for Bruce and the tag. Coyote races across the ring hoping to intercept Amy before she tags in Bruce.

 

Let’s go A-my!! *clap*clap*clap!*

 

Just about a foot and a half away

 

Let’s go A-my!! *clap*clap*clap!*

 

Less than a foot now

 

Let’s go A-my!! *clap*clap*clap!*

 

Mere inches from Bruce’s outstretched hand

 

“SPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAR!!!” King yells out as Coyote drives his shoulder into Amy’s mid section lifting the Punk Rock Princess into the air before he drives her to the canvas out of Bruce’s reach.

 

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

 

Kevin gets to his feet with the biggest, most arrogant smirk you can imagine knowing that he’s in full control of the match right now. The rookie just stands back and allows Amy to slowly pull herself back to her feet, he’s actually asking for her to get back up as he positions himself behind her.

 

“Oh I know what’s coming now” King says

 

“… of a bitch” Ben says as he finally got his headset back on

 

“Ah he didn’t get the job done, dang”

 

Coyote spins Amy around the second she’s back on her feet and just totally LEVELS her with a stiff clothesline that drives Amy into the ground with Kevin on top in the perfect position for a pinfall

 

“Is the girl man enough to take the Coyote Takedown?” King asks as Izzy Slappowitch drops to his knees.

 

ONE!!

 

 

“Oh she’s man eno… eeerm” Ben says before he catches on to what he’s about to say.

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

 

 

THR-FOOTONTHEROPE!!

 

“That bastard Bruce pulled her foot up on the rope” Ben yells out in anger as Bruce quite rightly DID pull Amy’s foot up on the bottom rope.

 

He even makes a big production deal out of calling Izzy’s attention to it so that it breaks the count before Coyote can win the match. Once Bruce is back in his corner he’s confronted by an enraged Coyote who curses and yells at Bruce for the cheap ploy.

 

“Oh go back to beating up your daddy” Bruce says.

 

“At least I know who my father is” Coyote spits out

 

“OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH BURN!!” Hardy adds as he tries to be young with the young but misses by like 15 years.

 

That comment seems to have pissed Bruce off as he steps one leg over the rope ready to enter the ring when Slappowitch step between the two to break up the fight. After a staredown between the two Coyote turns his attention back to his opponent, something he should have done earlier though as Amy is back on her feet and leaps forward towards Bruce with her hand outstretched.

 

Coyote catches her with a shoulder to the midsection as she’s mid air but he’s just a inch too close to Bruce’ corner and the two manage to touch each other.

 

“Coyote’s in DEEP SHIT” Ben says sounding like that’s completely alright with him.

 

“Bruce is totally fresh while Coyote has already had quite a hard fought match with Amy” King says “He made a rookie mistake and now he’s paying for it.”

 

To show that he’s not about to make another rookie mistake Kevin backs away from Bruce and Amy’s corner so that they cannot execute a double team move on him in the 5 seconds they have to trade places. Instead he just stands back and watches as Bruce steps over the top rope into the ring and rubs his hands in anticipation.

 

“You think he wishes he hadn’t pissed Bruce off now?” Ben asks.

 

“No – Coyote doesn’t strike me as a man who regrets anything he does”

 

Bruce approaches his opponent and goes for a collar and elbow tie up, but Coyote ducks under his opponent’s massive arms and strikes Bruce in the mid section with a knee instead. Bruce quickly shakes the blow off and turns around to face Coyote once more. Once he turns around he’s greeted with a drop kick to the chest that sends the big man backwards into the corner. Coyote takes a moment to celebrate the move only to be attacked by Bruce as the big man comes blasting out of the corner going for a lariat.

 

“Man I thought Bruce was going to take his head off, but Kevin spun that into a beautiful drop toe hold” Ben says almost admiring Coyote for a second.

 

“I knew you were a Coyote fan deep down Ben”

 

“AM NOT!”

 

“Yeah you are, he’s the reason you’re out here in the first place – admit it you’ve got little pictures of him all over your wall”

 

With Bruce down on his stomach Kevin is quick to strike with a couple of elbows aimed at Bruce’s left ear, the same ear that took the damage in the Japanese Deathmatch. After staggering Bruce a bit with the elbow shots Coyote gets back to his feet, bounces off the ropes and then lands a double stop right across Bruce’s shoulders

 

*STOMP!!*

 

“You’ve got to admit that he’s doing pretty well in a 2 on 1 situation King” Ben says.

 

“Well his partner was next to useless anyways, It’s not a “smashy-smashy” match so what can Insane Luchador really do?” King says dismissing the importance of Coyote’s partner.

 

“Are you serious? If Luchador would have been ineffectual what about Bruce? That’s his whole STYLE!” says Ben angrily.

 

Coyote is quickly back on his feet and drags Bruce up by the hair as well. Coyote swiftly bounces off the ropes and leaps at Bruce vertically to take him down with a Thez Press type of move, but the big man manages to wrap his arms around Kevins’ waist and then stagger backwards for a few steps until he’s in his own corner.

 

“Oh trouble” is all King can say

 

And he’s quite right as Amy leaps up and grabs Coyote by the hair and then both members of Drunk and Disorderly drop Coyote throat first on the top rope. Amy quickly tags herself in after the double team move and pulls Coyote back to his feet into a front face lock.

 

“Oh I love to see this in slow motion… really get a good view of the Double D…. DT” Ben says dreaming of something other than a wrestling match right now.

 

“Pervert” King says sending the “Irony Meter” to 11.

 

Amy quickly whips her whole body backwards driving the top of Coyote’s skull into the canvas to quite a pop. After quickly and discreetly checking that everything is still where it’s supposed to be Amy climbs up on the second rope and leaps off for a leg drop straight across Kevin’s chest.

 

“Now we’re seeing the 2 on 1 advantage at work” Ben says

 

“It was only a matter of time since Luchador abandoned his partner” King states

 

“ABANDONED?” Ben screams as his face turns red

 

“I’m glad to hear you agree with me Ben” King just says calmly as Ben blows a gasket.

 

Amy quickly reaches over and tags in Bruce, giving them yet another chance to double team Kevin Coyote. Bruce places Coyote’s head between his legs and pulls him up into a pile driver position while Amy climbs up on the second rope, just as Slappowitch starts the 5 count.

 

By the count of 3 Amy leaps off the 2nd rope, grabs Kevin’s feet and spikes the piledriver as Bruce sits backwards. A split second later Amy rolls out under the bottom rope before the 5 count.

 

“They’ve been working on that?” King says all surprised “I thought they were busy drinking”

 

“Coyote just isn’t able to fight off the relentless onslaught of both Bruce and Amy, he’s tried, he’s had his moments but this is a 2 on 1 situation” Ben points out because NO ONE at home had realized it until now.

 

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!

 

“What happened?? What happened?” King says all confused as none of the action in the ring really warranted such a huge reaction from the crowd.

 

“Look down the aisle” Hardy says

 

The cameras quickly turn towards the entrance where Insane Luchador is making his way towards the ring, his head is bandaged up, he's wearing a plastic neck collar, his clothes are covered in blood and one of the EMTs is trying to stop him from going but IL just shoves him out of the way and makes his way to the ring as he tears the collar off in anger.

 

IL!! IL!! IL!! IL!!

 

”I don’t believe it!!” King states as he and most of the crowd in the arena are surprised to see Insane Luchador returning to the match after being brutalized by Bruce and Wayne Blank.

 

“I do! This guy is triple tough, once he sets his sights on you there is no stopping him” Ben says as IL walks up the steps and stands in his corner, arm outstretched to give Coyote the chance to tag in.

 

Bruce had not seen Luchador come to the ring and is shocked when he turns around and sees the bandaged Extremist on the apron, so shocked that he totally forgets that he’s in the midst of a match with Kevin Coyote and lets him tag in IL without doing anything about it.

 

FUCK HIM UP!! FUCK HIM UP!! FUCK HIM UP!!

 

The crowd comes completely unhinged as IL steps into the ring with Bruce Blank. Blank backs off wanting nothing to do with IL on a fair, 1-on-1 basis, while Rickmen stalks his opponent with a look in his eyes that clearly shows that “Insane” is the right nickname for Andrew Rickmen.

 

“Oh Bruce done messed up! He thought he had taken him out before the match” Ben says with excitement as Bruce and IL are finally in the same ring at the same time together.

 

“This isn’t going to be pretty” King boldy predicts.

 

Bruce shakes his head and puts up his hands as he backs away from Insane Luchador, but IL doesn’t care and quickly leaps onto Bruce, wraps his left arm around Bruce’s neck and then lets his right hand hail down over Bruce’s face in an unmerciless storm of fists. It doesn’t take long to drive Bruce back into the corner where IL is able to shift his weight and stand on the ropes instead of having Bruce basically carry his weight and then attacks with BOTH fists.

 

“Oh come on now!! This is supposed to be a normal match” King laments.

 

“He has it coming, that and so much more King” Ben states.

 

“Oh so that makes it alright then? I say Pete had it coming too – so it’s okay what Coyote did right?” King sputters.

 

The referee half-heartedly begins a five count as Insane Luchador keeps blasting away at the side of Bruce’s face.

 

One

 

Two!!

 

But before he gets to three Coyote runs over near where Bruce and IL are to distract the referee and break the count – after all it’s to his advantage if Insane Luchador beats Bruce into a bloody pulp.

 

IL!! IL!! IL!! IL!!

 

Rickmen bends over and actually BITES Bruce on the left ear and pretty soon after the side of Bruce’s face turns red with blood.

 

“OH COME ON!!” King yells out

 

“Funny you didn’t complain earlier when Bruce and Wayne attacked Insane Luchador” Ben says

 

“Funny *wah-wah-wah* earlier” King says mocking the way Ben speaks.

 

Bruce manages to wedge a hand in between himself and Insane Luchador and then pushes back with all his might sending IL flying across the ring ass over elbow. The second Bruce starts to move in the direction of his partner the enraged Luchador springs back to his feet, leaps at Bruce once more, this time twisting his whole body as he kicks off against the turnbuckle and manages to take the big man down with a thunderous Tornado DDT

 

*WHAM!!*

 

IL!! IL!! IL!! IL!!

 

Luchador doesn’t even bother with a cover but instead strikes Bruce square in the throat with an elbow drop to deprive Bruce of any air. Seconds later Luchador grabs Bruce by the hair, drags him to his feet and then grabs hold of the King of Pain’s dirty mullet with BOTH hands.

 

“Hey ref the hair, the hair!” King complains.

 

But before the ref can count Insane Luchador uses both handfuls of hair to hip toss / throw Bruce to the mat.

 

“See he let go right away, don’t be such a whiner” Ben replies relishing the opportunity to get a shot it at King.

 

Bruce lands on his stomach and quickly uses the position to slide backwards on his knees as he pushes with his hands. Unfortunately for the big man he isn’t quite aware of just where he is in the ring and ends up sliding straight into the ringpost with one leg on each side instead of escaping the ring as he had planned.

 

“He’s trapped – the idiot trapped himself” Ben says getting bolder in his commentary as he believes that Bruce can’t hear him right now.

 

Insane Luchador shakes with rage as he stands in the middle of the ring, his entire body trembles with adrenaline as the crowd chants his name.

 

“If you look at Insane Luchador and Bruce you’d think this was a Hardcore match, they’re both bleeding all over the place” King says as Insane Luchador’s stitches have popped and he’s bleeding from his forehead once again.

 

“Can you imagine what would happen if there were no rules?” Ben asks

 

“Sheer carnage”

 

Insane Luchador reacts before Bruce can crawl away from the ring post and lands a stiff sliding drop kick right to the face of the trapped and helpless Blank.

 

*BLAM!!*

 

IL!! IL!! IL!! IL!!

 

Bruce writhes in pain both from the kick to the face but also from his groin being pushed into the ring post AGAIN. Insane Luchador has rolled back onto his knees after the kick to Bruce’s face and is admiring his handy work as a down right depraved smile creeps onto his blood covered face. Luchador slowly gets back to his feet as Bruce manages to drag himself out of the corner thus bringing his private parts back in “safe” territory.

 

“This… “ is all Ben can say as the brutality has stunned him

 

“Wise words Ben” King sniggers.

 

Insane Luchador turns to the crowd and raises both hands in the air to draw a monster reaction from all the fans in St. Paul. With his back momentarily turned he doesn’t see that Bruce manages to pull his cowboy boot off and then holds it heel up ready to strike at Insane Luchador when the opportunity arises. Once Bruce gets to his knees Insane Luchador turns around to face his opponent once more. When he gets closer Bruce grips the boot tightly and prepares to swing it

 

Only to have Coyote reach in and grab Bruce’s arm to stop it before Bruce can swing his steel tipped cowboy boot.

 

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!

 

“Are they cheering for Coyote?” Ben says in disbelief?

 

“Yes cause Minnesota is totally “Anti-Longdogger”” King says not bothering to explain to Hardy that they probably just popped because Bruce’s cheating attempt was foiled.

 

Insane Luchador runs across the ring and plants a right foot right across Bruce’s cheek knocking the big man down once more. After the kick Kevin leaps into the ring, kicks the loose cowboy boot away and then starts to attack the Ultraviolent champion.

 

“I guess Coyote just couldn’t stand being on the apron any more” Ben surmises.

 

“Or he objected to Bruce’s foot odor and wants to do something about it”

 

With both Luchador and Coyote in the ring Amy quickly steps through the ropes as well and joins in the action, why should they have all the fun after all? It doesn’t take long for the match to degenerate into an all out brawl between the four competitors and the referee really can’t do much other than just stand by and watch.

 

“It looks like Slappowitch just gave up on keeping them separate” King says as Slappowitch just stands back and looks like he wants no part of it.

 

“He’s giving them some leeway King, it’s within the rules” Ben says revealing that once again he’s got no clue what he’s talking about.

 

Amy and Coyote exchange lefts and rights with such speed that it’s hard to keep up with the flailing fists. Meanwhile Insane Luchador has Bruce in the ropes and takes him over the top as he uses his own body to drive the big man over the top rope with a clothesline. Luchador ends up on the apron while Bruce tumbles all the way to the floor only to be struck by a Luchador elbow drop seconds later. IL gets back to his feet and sees Excalibur on the floor where he dropped it before the match. His taped up hand wraps around the handle as the crowd explodes in cheers

 

FUCK HIM UP!! FUCK HIM UP!!

 

Luchador isn’t one to disappoint the crowd as he swings the lighttube bundle over his head bringing it down across Bruce’s neck with a mighty

 

*KRESSSSH!!*

 

*DING!*DING!*DING!*DING!*

 

Insane Luchador looks up in surprise as the bell rings, apparently Slappowitch caught the action on the outside and has called for the bell. Wayne Blank comes racing out from the back before Insane Luchador can do any more damage and quickly steps between IL and his brother as he brandishes his cattle prod in IL’s face

 

“What just happened” Ben asks all confused.

 

It’s especially confusing as Kevin Coyote and Amy Stephens are still fighting in the ring, rolling on the mat as they exchange fists like it was going out of fashion.

 

“Ladies and gentlemen” Funyon starts up after Slappowitch has informed him of his decision “Referee Slappowitch has no choice but to disqualify Insane Luchador for the use of a foreign object”

 

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

 

“The winners of the match, DRUNK AND DIISOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORDERLY!!”

 

It’s not a decision that sits well with the crowd, especially not the cheap way Bruce got the win. It doesn’t look like the win pleases Amy either as she finally stops battling with Coyote and just rolls out of the ring looking annoyed that a good fight was ended before she was done kicking ass.

 

“Look at Wayne, he’s dragging Bruce to the back” Ben says as Wayne helps Bruce to the back while keeping Insane Luchador at bay.

 

“I know it’s a cliché but this is FAR from over” King says

 

“You know Bruce and Amy may have won but I don’t think anyone can say that Bruce came out of this looking like a winner” Ben states as IL raises the remains of his lighttube sword in the air to a HUGE response.

 

“Oh just get the hell out of here Ben, Coyote is leaving the arena and I don’t have to put up with you for one more second.” King snaps at Ben.

[JHawk 0]

SWF Lockdown returns to air from the XCEL Energy Center in St. Paul, Minnesota. A few camera swipes around the arena reveal clever homemade signs that the fans created for viewer amusement. A few feature wrestler’s names spelled wrong, some have created in ten seconds using a unevenly cut piece of poster board and Stanford King Size magic marker. “Welcome back to Lockdown, fans!” yells Longdogger Pete. “We’re just about ready to get down to bid’ness in our next lethal lottery contest!” he then yells. A graphic comes up in the screen, featuring the likenesses of newcomer Michael Cross and Landon Maddix. “Later on this evening, in our main event, Michael Cross goes in as the underdog against young veteran Landon Maddix in a steel cage match,” says Pete. “There’s no telling if the cage will of the chain-linked variety, or the of the blue prison-bar variety,” says King.

 

The first graphic sweeps away, and is replaced by a graphic of four gentlemen grouped together. Shown are Arch Griffon, Jay Hawke, Jimmy the Doom, and Manson. “Our next match of the evening features quite an interesting match-up, King,” says Pete. “Arch Griffon hates Jay Hawke. Jay Hawke hates Arch Griffon. Jimmy Doom well, he’ll fight anybody equally hard. Manson is Arch Griffon tag team partner and they were a good duo, but dissipated after they came up short in a TLC match months ago,” explains King. “Furthermore, the irony is that the winner of this tournament gets a shot at the tag team titles in a TLC match. This must make Manson and Griffon think for a second,” says King.

 

“Crusher Destroyer” by Mastodon hits on the PA, and to the jeering, and cheering of the fans, Jimmy the Doom and Manson come out from behind the curtain and quickly make their way down to the ring, followed by Lois the Unethical. On one side of the ramp, Manson throws up the bull horns, which are quickly booed by the Minnesota fans. Then, on the other side of the ramp, Jimmy and Lois do….things, to a great response from the Minnesota fans. Funyon stands in the ring along with the referee for the match, Mack McElroy. Funyon warms up his vocal chords and starts his introduction for the match.

 

“The following Lethal Lottery match is scheduled for one fall, and has a thirty minute time limit….introducing first, with a win loss record of 1-0; at a combined weight of 485 pounds, being accompanied by Lois the Unethical, MAANNSONN and JIMMMMY THE DOOOOOOMMM!” “Not much needs to be said about the teaming of Jimmy and Manson, except for that they both like to fight people, and have won their first match,” says Pete. “The only observation I can make is that Manson seems rather distant out there,” observes King. “He may be a bit lost out there because he is about to take on his former tag team partner Arch Griffon,” says Pete.

 

Jimmy and Manson go about warming up in the ring, not making much eye contact with each other. “Crusher Destroyer” fades away, and the crowd goes quiet. A few moments later, “Bloodlust of the Human Condition” starts to blare inside the XCEL Center, drawing up a mostly negative reaction from the crowd. The lights dimmed, out come both Arch Griffon and Jay Hawke. The hulking Griffon is only half outlined by the spotlight used for Jay Hawke. They walk side by side down the entranceway, until Hawke quickly scurries ahead of Archie to take the lead. The Dean of Professional Wrestling overshadows Griffon’s simple entrance attire with extravagant purple and black robe, and International Title Belt. Funyon continues once again with the introductions.

 

“And their opponents; with a win-loss record of 1-0; at a combined weight of 517 pounds, ARRCHH GRRIFFONN and the SWF INTERNATIONAL CHAMPION, JAAAYY HHAAWWKKE!” yells Funyon. “Perhaps the most intriguing team of this tournament has to be Arch Griffon and Jay Hawke,” says Pete. “Everyone knows that Arch Griffon is back to challenge Jay Hawke for the International Title,” says King. “And most people would say that Griffon may have the best chance to take it off of him, as he has done it once before,” says Pete. “But who knows when and how Griffon will get that chance,” says King.

 

The four men all stand in the ring and are checked for foreign objects by Mack McElroy. Arch Griffon is clean. Both Manson and Jimmy are clean. When Hawke is felt up by McElroy, the referee pauses, and quickly reaches into the top of Hawke’s right boot. Eureka! One half of a pair of brass knuckles is found in Hawke’s boot, drawing a raucious cheer from the Minnesota crowd. “And for the first time in a long time, a referee confiscates an international object before it used on a wrestler,” says Pete. “Someone, give that man a raise!” yells King sarcastically. Hawke turns around to look to Griffon for support, but Archie does not approve. Arch stands, his hands looked on his hips, as he stares at Hawke with a deadpan expression.

 

“JAY HAWKE SUCKS!”

 

“JAY HAWKE SUCKS!”

 

Jimmy and Manson exchange a nod after laughing at Hawke’s mistake. Doom exits the ring, and leaves the beginning of the match to Manson. Once more, Hawke and Griffon get into an argument about who is going to start the match. Arch nearly charges into the middle of the ring towards Manson, but is held up by Hawke, who grasps Griffon around the waist in protest. Hawke lets Griffon go, and starts to talk with his hands. Arch waves him off and takes his spot in the corner. Both Archie and Doom grab their respective tag team tethers and wait in their spots. McElroy, after giving the weapon to a security guard, signals for the match to begin.

 

*DINGDINGDING!*

 

And with the match officially underway, the two combatants circle each other in the center of the ring.

 

“And this should be a very interesting start with Jay Hawke and Manson,” explains Pete. “These two men have faced each other for the International Championship, most notably in an Old School rules match last year.”

 

“And look at who came out on top in that one,” says King. “Jay Hawke. Much like he will tonight. Can’t be too hard to beat Manson with that…guy…as his partner.”

 

The two men lock up in the center of the ring. Jay Hawke tries in vain to throw his stronger opponent to the mat, but he’s quickly thrown down by Manson instead. Arch Griffon shakes his head in disgust as Jay Hawke gets to his feet and tries it again. Same result, of course. With that, Jay Hawke points to the corner and asks for Jimmy the Doom to be tagged in.

 

“He’s actually asking for Jimmy the Doom to be tagged in?” asks King. “I think he’s been smoking too much of the wacky weed here.”

 

Manson shakes his head, obviously wanting a couple of shots at the Dean of Professional Wrestling again. They lock up collar-and-elbow, and Jay Hawke quickly locks Manson into a side headlock, then spins it around into a hammerlock for the sole reason that he can. Manson goes for an elbow, which is ducked, and Hawke releases the hammerlock as he arrogantly laughs at Manson’s miscue. It’s just too bad that he doessn’t see the other elbow that is attached to the forearm that catches Hawke in the face and knocks him down.

 

“And that’s the problem with being as arrogant as Hawke is,” says Pete. “He got drilled with a forearm smash after avoiding that elbow.”

 

“That’s cheating though,” says an angry King. “You’re not allowed to throw a forearm when it’s unexpected!”

 

“Who the hell made that rule,” yells Pete as Manson refuses to allow Hawke to get to his feet, leveling him with a series of short chops to the back of the neck that would make…um…what’shisname…you know, the Japanese guy…blush with shame. Manson quickly follows it up with a knee lift that sends Hawke sprawling into a corner, then reaches over and tags in Jimmy the Doom.

 

“Just what we need,” King says sarcastically. “Jimmy the freaking Doom wasting all the TV time.”

 

Jay Hawke’s strategy in this situation is simple: Keep it a technical wrestling match for as long as possible. With that in mind, he quickly locks Doomtopia’s favorite son into a side headlock. Doom surprises Hawke by reversing into a side headlock of his own, then…

 

DOOMERFIC!

 

…quickly takes Jay Hawke down with a bulldog. Doom goes a quick cover:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Kickout. A surprised Hawke quickly rolls over to the corner and tags in Arch Griffon, who really doesn’t want in the ring but steps between the ropes nonetheless. Jay Hawke rolls to the apron, telling Arch “watch the bulldog” as Arch shakes his head. Arch then turns toward Jimmy the Doom and sticks his head forward, practically challenging Jimmy to put the headlock on him and try to bulldog him to the mat. Jimmy obliges, but as he leaps for the bulldog, Archie holds him in midair for a few seconds before dropping him backwards with a suplex. Jimmy does convulsions on the mat as Arch stands up, soaking in a mixed but largely positive reaction from the crowd.

 

“Arch with more strength than his partner Jay Hawke,” summarizes Pete, “and that led to him countering the bulldog with a crushing suplex.”

 

“Well, it’s pretty easy to execute a crushing suplex when you weigh over 300 pounds,” replies King as Griffon brings Jimmy the Doom into a seated position and levels him with a hard kick into the back. Jimmy goes into convulsions as Jay Hawke enters the ring waving Griffon off.

 

Hawke: “That’s not how you do it!”

 

Jay Hawke measures Jimmy like a Hollywood director setting up a scene, then levels Jimmy with a harder kick to the back.

 

Griffon: “You call that a kick? Watch this!”

 

Griffon levels Jimmy with an even harder kick, and the Doomtopian tries to make his way to the corner for a tag, unaware that Hawke isn’t done with the lesson.

 

Hawke: “Pathetic. Watch this!”

 

Hawke’s latest effort catches Jimmy right in the spine, and Jimmy can only let out one solitary word, practically squeaking it out:

 

“Mommy.”

 

Griffon quickly places Jimmy back into a seated position, then takes a look at Hawke. Hawke nods, and both men pick a kidney, getting in stereo kicks that are going to have Jimmy the Doom urinating blood for a week. Hawke finally leaves the ring, and Griffon goes for the cover:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Kickout. Jimmy still clutches at his back as he gets off the cover, but Arch Griffon is quick to pull Jimmy the Doom to his feet. Griffon whips Jimmy into the ropes and ducks his head for a backdrop. Jimmy stops short and takes Griffon down with a DDT, but doesn’t get the full effect of it. It is enough for Jimmy to crawl over and make a tag to Manson, who slowly enters the ring.

 

“Now here’s the matchup I’ve wanted to see, Pete,” acknowledges King. “These two guys were regular tag team partners not too long ago, and now they have to beat the hell out of each other. I love it.”

 

Pete replies, “I hate to agree with you -- ever -- but you’re right. This is certainly an intriguing situation.”

 

Griffon turns around and stares face-to-face with his former partner. The two men begin discussing something in the middle of the ring, but the microphones aren’t picking it up. “Gotta love some good old-fashioned trash talking,” says King, about a second or two before Manson and Griffon shake hands.

 

King: “What the hell!”

 

Manson tags Jimmy the Doom in as Arch Griffon tags in Jay Hawke. Manson and Arch then leave the ring, leaving Jimmy the Doom and Jay Hawke to stand dumbfounded on the ring apron as King yells, “What the hell is going on?” That is basically Jimmy the Doom’s reaction as well, but Jay Hawke uses “what the hell” in a different context, deciding instead to enter the ring, run across the ring, and glom Jimmy the Doom from behind, causing the Doomtopian to fall hard to the arena floor.

 

“At least Hawke was smart enough to take advantage of this,” says King, “but why would those two men just leave their partners like that?”

 

“Hard to say,” says Pete, “but I’m guessing they’re pretty good friends outside the ring.”

 

“Just like Spike and Zyon, right?”

 

As the broadcasters continue the argument, Jay Hawke has followed Jimmy the Doom to the arena floor, and he stomps away at his opponent’s back. Hawke then picks up Doom, his 6’5” frame making for an awkward body slam on the concrete floor.

 

TWO!

 

Hawke connects with a few more stomps, but Jimmy the Doom begins trying to get back to his feet. As he gets to his hands and knees, Jay Hawke is quick to drop a leg across the back of his neck, sending Jimmy’s face crashing back down to the floor.

 

FOUR!

 

Jay Hawke rolls into the ring, then back out to the floor to break the count. Jimmy the Doom gets back to his knees again, and Jay Hawke levels Jimmy with a kick to the ribs that sprawls Jimmy against the guardrail.

 

ONE!

 

“And here you see the mark of a top competitor in this business,” King tells the TV audience. “He finds a way to get an advantage, and he stays on the attack.”

 

“And he obviously feels the wind was knocked out of Jimmy when he fell to the floor,” observes Pete as Hawke begins to use a shoulder to ram Jimmy’s back into the guardrail. “Each of these moves is focusing on the back and the ribs, which is bound to hurt Jimmy the Doom’s breathing in the later stages of this contest.”

 

FIVE!

 

Again Hawke rolls in and out of the ring to break the count, then drives Jimmy’s back into the ringpost yet again. Thinking Jimmy might be sufficiently hurt, Hawke rolls his lanky opponent into the ring. Hawke gets up onto the ring apron and waits for the Doom to stand up, then springboards off the top rope and colliding with a beautiful lariat that might have decapitated Jimmy if it weren’t for his DOOMOSITY~! Hawke immediately goes for the cover:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THR -- kickout. Hawke stands up again and waits for Jimmy the Doom to get to his feet, almost waiting for him to get to his feet. Jimmy does so, but he’s quickly back down to the canvas again, thanks to a swinging neck breaker from the Dean of Professional Wrestling. Hawke goes for another cover:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Kickout. Hawke decides to slow the pace down and wear his taller opponent down, locking in a chinlock while driving a knee into the back to keep Jimmy on the mat.

 

Pete: “Say what you want about Jimmy the Doom’s unorthodox style, but he’s tough. The lariat alone might have been enough to put most men away, but Jimmy the Doom has survived not only that, but a swinging neck breaker as well.”

 

King: “That might be the case, but it’s only a matter of time before Hawke puts Jimmy away and makes his team the team to beat in this Lethal Lottery tournament.”

 

Hawke picks the pace up again, driving a series of knees into the small of Jimmy’s back. The Dean then bends down to pull Jimmy back to his feet, but…

 

DOOMTACULAR!

 

…Jimmy the Doom pushes up and levels the International Champion with a palm thrust to put some space between him and his opponent. Doom quickly fires with a roundhouse kick that backs Hawke into the corner. Sensing the match is turning for the better, he waits for Hawke to start staggering out of the corner, then he leaps, catching Jay Hawke with a picture-perfect high cross body.

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Kickout. “Can you believe he nearly pinned the champion?” asks Pete, and you know King’s answer, so let’s instead focus on Jimmy picking Jay up and whipping him into the turnbuckle. Jimmy immediately charges into the turnbuckle and leaps up, hooking Hawke by the head and taking him down with a headlock.

 

Pete: “The 73.5267.1094Q80.16!”

 

King: “The WHAT?!?”

 

The broadcasters, like Jay Hawke, don’t notice that the International Champion’s shoulders have indeed fallen to the mat:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THR -- shoulder up. The broadcasters yet again comment on how close Jimmy the Doom of all people has come to beating the International Champion as Jay Hawke makes his way to his feet. Hawke summons up all the strength he can and pushes Jimmy forward, getting himself out of the corner and sending his opponent chest-first into the corner. Hawke rolls Jimmy up as he staggers backwards, hooking the jean shorts for leverage:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THR -- kickout. “Hawke tried to steal another one,” says Pete as Jimmy gets to his feet and ducks a Hawke clothesline. “Whatever works,” King replies as Jimmy ducks another Hawke clothesline, then turns around and levels the International Champion with a dropkick. Jimmy goes for the cover:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Kickout. Jimmy is quickly to his feet, and he’s measuring Jay Hawke, who is slowly getting to his feet. As Hawke stands, Jimmy lifts one foot into the air, raises his arms into the air.

 

DOOMLAMEO!

 

…and actually channels Ralph freaking Macchio to kick Hawke in the face and knock him back down to the canvas.

 

Pete: “Yak Kick!”

 

King: “WHAT?!”

 

And Jimmy once again goes for the cover:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THR -- kickout.

 

Pete: “And he nearly got him with that!”

 

King: “I don’t believe this! Jimmy the Doom is using some unique offense, and he’s actually come less than half a second away from beating Hawke on more than one occasion!”

 

At this point, Jimmy signals something to the crowd that supposed to say “That’s it” but looks more like a failed attempt at a Michael Flatley impression. He then grabs Jay Hawke by the arm and twists the arm, setting up for the series of combination kicks that could keep Hawke down for the count. However, Hawke rolls forward through the arm wringer, then gets to his knees and sweeps Jimmy legs from underneath him. Jimmy falls, but only for a second, but that one second is enough for Jay Hawke to take Jimmy the Doom down with an inside cradle:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

Jimmy the Doom reverses the cradle:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THR -- Jay Hawke reverses the cradle, ending up awfully close to the ropes:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THRE -- Jimmy the Doom reverses the cradle, and both men actually roll over the bottom rope and fall hard to the arena floor.

 

Pete: “Oh no!”

 

King: “I don’t think I’ve ever seen that before, Pete!”

 

Both men have had the wind knocked out of them, and there’s nothing for referee Mack McElroy to do but start his ten count:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

THREE!

 

 

“Do not let this end in a draw,” begs King! “Let’s see a winner here!”

 

 

FIVE!

 

Jimmy the Doom gets to his knees and begins to climb onto the ring apron.

 

 

SIX!

 

Jimmy the Doom makes his way to the ring apron.

 

SEVEN!

 

Jimmy tries to stand, but Hawke reaches up in desperation and catches Jimmy with a low blow that is unseen by the referee.

 

EIGHT!

 

Jay Hawke climbs onto the ring apron as Jimmy slumps to the floor.

 

NINE!

 

Jay Hawke rolls back into the ring,

 

TEN!

 

 

DING DING DING!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

Pete: “I don’t believe this! Jay Hawke has once again cheated to win!”

 

King: “You call that cheating! He beat Jimmy into the ring! Case closed!”

 

Funyon: “Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of this contest by way of a countout, making their record in the Lethal Lottery 2-0...ARRRRRRRRRCH GRIFFFFFFFON and JAAAAAAAAAAAAY HAWWWWWWWWKE!”

 

Pete: “Hawke catches Jimmy the Doom with a low blow, somehow the referee doesn’t see it, and Hawke beats the count back in to win the match!”

 

King: “Well, life in Doomtopia might toughen you up, but even Doomtopians are going to feel it if they get caught below the belt. I hope Lois the Unethical isn’t going to too upset that plans have changed tonight.”

 

Pete: “Will you stop?”

 

King: “Stop what?”

 

Pete: “Never mind. Plenty more action still to come here tonight on Lockdown after this commercial break!”

[zyon 0]

SWF Lockdown returns from its mandatory scheduled commercial break for Poke, the new soft drink that combines the similar tastes of Coke and Pepsi. “Soak it up bitches” would be their brilliant slogan. A 360-degree view of the SOLD OUT Xcel Energy Center, located in St. Paul, Minnesota is shown as SWF television prepares to make memories for the thousands in attendance, and so far they completed their mission to entertain. The overanxious crowd has rarely taken their seats since they have been on their feet all night. With the Lethal Lottery in full stride, the SWF has booked a few singles matches along the way. Later will be the tremendous main event of a rookie sensation, and a man searching for his long lost career. However, at this moment, a cruiserweight title match shall greet the crowd!!

 

The gorgeous undertone of silence fills the arena as the excited crowd explodes at the sight of one, Mr. Kobe.

 

“How did such a pudgy man reach the pinnacle of managerial status in such little time?”

 

“His own personality, along with the great upstarts that he has the joy of managing. Both Akira Kaibatsu and Michael Cross have made quite the name for themselves lately under the Asian Underground moniker. Tonight, both are in singles competition. The Divine Wind has a shot at the coveted cruiserweight title, while Michael Cross receives his first shot at the main event, against one Landon Maddix.”

 

“Well then it looks like I’m the number one Asian Underground fan for tonight. Hopefully Akira dethrones Zyon, and Cross forces Maddix into retirement.”

 

The pudgy, Mr. Kobe calmly waddles down to the ring with his original client at his side. Kobe’s expensive suit along with his demeanor explains to many that he lives a life of luxury, while his client’s strut is that of excitement. Akira covered in the colors of blue and white keeps in pace with his slower manager, cracking his neck along the way.

 

“Introducing the challenger…Hailing from Sendai, Japan, weighing in at 195 lbs…accompanied to the ring by Mr. Kobe. He is the DIVVVVINE WIND AKIRA KAIBATSU!!!!”

 

Funyon announces as the cheer from the audience are heard loud and clear.

 

“YEEEEAAAAHHH!”

 

“The people have come to love the Asian Underground. Hell, I’ve come to enjoy their work. They are so fluid and explosive, which could explain their undefeated record in the Lethal Lottery.”

 

“Shocking, Pete. You in love with a fan favorite? Truly shocking.” The arrogant Suicide King sounds off.

 

The manager and client calmly enter the ring with Akira showing brief signs of nervousness. The rookie paces the ring, cracks his knuckles, and even pumps his fist toward the crowd warming them up for what’s to come. Mr. Kobe barks orders at his client to calm down, which Akira immediately obeys…

 

“I’M BORN!!!!”

 

“I’M ALIVE!!!”

 

“I BREATHE!!!”

 

It’s a good thing Akira was able to chill out because the proverbial roof has been officially blown off!

 

“YEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!!!”

 

“Good lord, listen to that reaction!”

 

“It seems Zyon’s cheating has gotten him quite the fan base.” King snickers.

 

Pete shakes his head, “Actually it’s the exact opposite. Time and time again, Zyon has admitted his faults. That would be something the people respect, not that you can sympathize with that or anything.”

 

“And his opponent, Hailing from Elkhart, Indiana, and weighing in at 200 lbs. He is the reigning SWF CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD…ZYYYYYON!!!”

 

With the glistening cruiserweight title around his waist, Zyon sprints down the entrance ramp, slapping hands on the way down. The youth energetically leaps on to the ring apron, receiving a cold stare from the honorable Akira Kaibatsu. The youth simply brushes the gesture off, saluting the crowd with a fist pump before entering the ring. Ready and willing to defend his title, Zyon unbuckles the gold around his waist, performing his standard head bang/arm raise combo, unleashing a wave of excitement.

 

“It’s been quite some time since Zyon has had a one on one encounter.”

 

“Yep, he doesn’t have Spike to watch his back.”

 

“Well by Zyon’s reaction last week to Hardy questioning Zyon’s love for the cruiserweight title, I would say he doesn’t need his help.”

 

“And by last week’s interview I’d say he needs help. Professional help that is.”

 

King continues to take jabs at Zyon, while the Longdogga continues to defend the fan favorite. Referee Nick Soapdish hoists the shiny belt into the air, gaining the strict attention of both superstars…and a manager. Giving the title to a luxurious beauty on the outside, referee Nick Soapdish is ready to get this party started.

 

DING DING DING!!!

 

The Unique Youth hops around in place as Mr. Kobe gives Akira Kaibatsu one last instruction before exiting the ring. The masked Japanese import exits from his corner, confident that he can out wrestle the current cruiserweight champion. Not one to throw caution to the wind, Zyon leaves his corner with a dead sprint. Prepared for Zyon’s spotty offense, the Divine Wind steps forward hurling the youth around with a tilt-a-whirl. Losing his grip, Akira drops Zyon right back to his feet, leaving himself open for a sharp forearm.

 

“CRACK!”

 

The masked warrior stumbles backward slightly, while Zyon turns sprinting away. Instinctively, Akira takes a step forward as the youth leaps on to the middle rope, springing backward. Twisting in the air, Zyon hurls both feet toward Akira looking to shock him with a corkscrew missile dropkick. Side stepping the champion, Akira watches as Zyon crashes to the mat sternum first. Aiming for Zyon’s previously injured back, the Divine Wind attempts a flashy pendulum elbow drop. Fearing an early momentum shift, Zyon rolls out of the way, leaving Akira to brilliantly overshoot the wicked elbow, landing safely on his far hand. Keeping with the pace, Zyon leaps forward with a crisp forward roll, placing Akira in a half nelson, trapping him in a pinning position.

 

ONE…kickout.

 

The crowd prepares an Indy applause, but the two speedsters dare to continue at their blistering pace. One half of the Asian Underground sprints forward, lunging at the eager youth, who hooks Akira under the armpit, tossing him forward with a hip toss. The acrobatic Divine Wind flips forward, landing gracefully on his feet, while simultaneously reaching back, latching on to Zyon’s head. The challenger attempts to take Zyon over with a snapmare, but like his Japanese counterpart, Zyon lands on his feet. Catching Zyon off guard, the Divine Wind hurls the youth backward, rolling him up in a school boy pin attempt.

 

ONE…push off.

 

Zyon launches Akira off the pin attempt, shooting him forward. Hurrying to his feet, Zyon attempts to charge at Akira, while his back is turned. The quick footsteps from the youth are in audible range as the Divine Wind turns, latching his feet around the foot of the charging Zyon. Tripping the youth with a drop toe hold, Akira forces Zyon downward, throat first into the middle rope. Looking to take advantage, Akira leaps wishing to drive both feet into Zyon’s back! Sensing the immediate danger, Zyon spins away from the ropes. Breaking out the improv skills, Akira places both feet on the second rope, leaping backward toward the rebounding cruiserweight champion. Eyeing Akira, Zyon tries to prepare a defense as the Divine Wind blasts Zyon with a 45 degree ax handle smash!

 

“YEAAAAHHH!”

 

“These two are really going at it.”

 

“Hey I’ll admit it. I’m enjoying myself.”

 

The wicked double ax handle forces Zyon against the ropes giving Akira the chance to latch on to his opponent’s arm. Planting his foot, Akira Irish whips Zyon across the ring. The Unique Youth bounces off the ropes charging Akira, who stands ready for the cruiserweight champion. Seizing the youth, the Divine Wind spins Zyon around with a dazzling tilt-a-whirl. Mr. Kobe continues to cheer his client on as Akira loses his grip on the devilishly quick Zyon, falling into an arm drag counter from the youth!

 

“YEAAAAHHH!”

 

The crowd cheers the tilt-a-whirl counter, as it is Zyon who looks to be the aggressor, planting a boot into the sternum of his enemy. Akira fires back with a straight round house that Zyon barely avoids with a cartwheel escape to the side. Gaining the advantage from a crouched position, Zyon extends his leg looking to sweep Akira off of his feet. Though it was a good idea in theory the Divine Wind easily leaps backward, dodging the sweep with the crispness of karate masters like Chuck Norris and Jean Claud Van Damme. Carefully searching behind him, the youth puts his hands up set to take on whatever comes his way. What Zyon doesn’t know is that Akira actually, leaped on to the second rope during his averting of the sweep. Defiantly catching the youth off guard, the Divine Wind leaps off the second rope, hooking Zyon in a front face lock while spinning through the air. Akira shifts his momentum downward attempting to spike Zyon into the mat with a modified tornado DDT! Countering the apparent head drop, Zyon keeps his balance attempting to float Akira over with a northern lights suplex. In spite of Zyon’s shocking counter, Akira pushes off at the peak of Zyon’s lift, wrapping his legs around the youth’s head. The crowd gasps as Zyon drives the young Japanese wrestler toward the mat, but then cheer once Akira transitions the power bomb into a hurricarana!!!

 

“What a series of counters performed by those two.”

 

“I admit that was impressive. I’m mostly impressed by the fact that those two are capable of actual wrestling.”

 

Reaching back to cradle Zyon’s leg, Akira gasps as the youth pulls him back into a roll up with his legs.

 

ONE…

 

Akira quickly rolls out, pushing Zyon’s legs over his shoulders with a jackknife like pin.

ONE…

 

Not do be outdone; Zyon reaches up struggling to break free. Countering the jackknife, Zyon pushes down on Akira’s head flipping him into the after effects of a sunset pin.

 

ONE…

 

“CRACK!”

 

Akira decisively decides to break the pin with his foot, slamming it into the face of his opponent. Both men roll away from each other, pulling themselves up into a shoot wrestling stance.

 

“CLAP CLAP CLAP!!!”

 

The crowd applauds the two combatants. They continue their battle of mortal combat with Zyon going for a straight right hand. Showing the quickness of a cat or the reflects of actors in “bullet time” action flicks, Akira moves his head ever so slightly to the right, dodging the strike. Grappling Zyon around the waist, Akira throws the young cruiserweight champion over with a side suplex, twisting his body while extending his knee. With his knee extended, Akira slams Zyon back first across his knee with a majorly ingenious back breaker!!!

 

“Wow, Akira busting the offense tonight.”

 

“What offense? Two failed attempts at a tilt-a-whirl whatever the hell he was going to do, and fifteen minutes of spotty counters. Then again the move is aimed at the back.”

 

“Which is no doubt due to Mr. Kobe’s scouting.”

 

The match finally slows down as Zyon takes the time to clutch his back, leaving himself open for attack. Without warning, Akira forces Zyon back to his feet, only to immediately lift him off the ground by his waist. Extending his knee once again, Akira aggressively drops Zyon across his knee with a pendulum back breaker! The Unique Youth rolls off of Akira’s knee, exposing his back to the attacker. Hurrying to the outside, the Japanese warrior spring boards off the top rope, leaping into the air. Gaining velocity, the Divine Wind simply stabs his knee into the youth’s spine!

 

“GAH!”

 

Zyon cries out as Akira looks to maintain his offensive superiority. Clutching Zyon by the hair, Akira violently drags Zyon back to his feet, kicking him in the gut. First hooking the youth in a front face lock, the Divine Wind hoists Zyon vertically. Scissoring his legs from side to side, Zyon struggles to break free of his unwelcoming predicament. The scrunched up look on his face tells the viewers that Akira is indeed struggling to keep Zyon in the air, until the youth relieves the challenger of his pressure by flipping out behind his opponent. Feeling the momentum shifting, the crowd supports the reigning cruiserweight champion as he shuts Akira down with a reverse front face lock.

 

“This is the beginning of the wicked cutter!” Pete shills.

 

The Longdogga would be correct as Zyon spins out…vehemently shoved away by the Divine Wind!!! Persisting Akira, Zyon bounces off the ropes lunging into a TILT-A-WHIRL…BACK BREAKER!!!!!

 

“Correction Pete. That WAS the beginning of the wicked cutter, but the fruitation of a devastating tilt-a-whirl back breaker.”

 

Shutting his eyes, Zyon challenges himself to shut out the pain, unknowing of Akira’s next action.

 

“CRACK!!!”

 

Well now he knows.

 

“GAH!”

 

Zyon shouts, clutching his back after the stinging kick to his back. Pushing himself off the mat, Zyon falls right into the place of Akira Kaibatsu as the Divine Wind scoops Zyon off of his feet. Kicking the air, Zyon once again looks to squirm his way out of another horrible predicament. Feeling his grip loosed, Akira quickly body slams Zyon into the turnbuckle! The youth’s body dangles, trapped in the dungeon like tree of woe!

 

“TREE OF WOE!” The Gambling man marks for the tree of woe.

 

Zyon clutches his back, as everything he watches is not only blurry, but also upside down. Waving his hands around trying to break free, Zyon is blind to Akira exiting the ring. He is also blind to the Divine Wind’s current actions of grappling his opponent by the head. BUT, Zyon IS NOT blind to the fact that he is defenseless against the cunning strategy of one half of the Asian Underground. The youth’s hands flail all over the place as Akira pulls back on Zyon’s head, arching his back in an atrocious angle. Mr. Kobe openly approves of Akira’s aggressive manner, but senior official Nick Soapdish does not. The referee starts his mandatory count.

 

ONE

 

TWO

 

THREE

 

FOUR

 

FIVE

 

SIX

 

“Heh, poor Zyon. Normally, Akira would be viewed as being overaggressive, but with the cruiserweight addenda he has plenty of time.”

 

“King, you are absolutely correct. Akira has until the count of twenty to torture the reigning cruiserweight champ.”

 

SEVEN

 

EIGHT

 

The youth continues to have his back torqued in an unpleasant manner, while Akira shows little remorse. The tad bit of remorse may originate from his honorable background, but with Mr. Kobe approving of Akira’s strategy…Zyon should expect more pain and punishment.

 

NINE

 

TEN

 

Referee Nick Soapdish is officially half way as Akira decides to release the illegal hold. Zyon’s face swells a shade of red as he hangs upside down, weakened by Akira’s tactics. The Divine Wind briskly slides into the ring, lifting Zyon upward until he is halfway to becoming completely vertical. Wrapping one arm around the waist of his opponent, Akira drags Zyon away from his dungeon, carefully walking the youth away from the ropes. During this process of moving the Unique Youth, Zyon remerges from his defenseless state, placing a firm kick to the face of his opponent. Breaking free of Akira’s clutches, the youth falls to the mat landing on all fours. Slightly taken off track, the Divine Wind looms over the fallen champion, capable of taking advantage. However, a moment of hesitation gives Zyon ample opportunity to drive his shoulder into the gut of the challenger. The crowd slowly starts to get behind the champion who rises back to a full vertical base. Clutching his back, Zyon turns and bounces off the ropes, gaining quite a bit of speed. The youngster opts to leave the air one more, soaring through it like a pigeon with a message. Extending his arm, Zyon swims through the atmosphere as he falls toward the challenger with a clothesline. Aware of the wild cheering emanating from the audience, Akira instinctively rolls forward avoiding the collision. Physically, Zyon recovers by landing on his feet. Mentally, Zyon is a little broken as the crowd has cooled down along with the youth’s comeback. Examining his position, Zyon exits to the ring apron, prepping himself for another high risk maneuver.

 

“CRACK!!”

 

Akira though will have none of it as he drops the youth to the floor with an ultra slick Roaring Elbow!

 

“Hey that’s cause for Disqualification!” King shouts.

 

“Calm down King. Zyon was already on the ring apron. Akira didn’t toss Zyon over the top rope.” Pete talks down to King as if he was a simpleton.

 

Carried by the impact of the Roaring Elbow, Zyon collapses on to the safety barrier. The crazed fans in the front row smack the youth on his back, encouraging him to keep fighting the good fight while even damaging him a little. Poking at his face, the current cruiserweight champion checks to make sure his jaw wasn’t relocated or anything. Shaking off the cobwebs, Zyon flips his hair out of his eyes, turning with a sudden look of dismay covering his facial expression. Delighting the crowd with his dazzling offense, Akira sprints forward floating over the top rope, horizontally corkscrewing through the air! Slicing the atmosphere with a multitude of rotations, the Divine Wind dazzles the audience as he drops down on to Zyon!!!!

 

“WHYEEAAAHHHHHHWHOOO!”

 

The crowd celebrates what they just seen.

 

“What a move! Not only did he leap over the top rope, but he also spun over them giving himself enough time to add in a second rotation. Amazing!”

 

“Way to risk life and limb for a cheap pop, Kibatman.” King purposely botches Akira’s last name.

 

Taken back by the suicidal persona of one Akira Kaibatsu, referee Nick Soapdish takes a moment to replay what he just witnessed. Once he regains his bearings, Soapdish throws his hands up starting the cruiserweight twenty count.

 

ONE

 

TWO

 

THREE

 

The challenger rises back to his feet, showing little ill effects from the dangerous maneuver he performed moments ago. Seizing Zyon by the hair, Akira forces the youth back to his feet, rolling him back into the ring.

 

“Oh c’mon Akira, torture that spot monkey on the outside.”

 

“Ugh King, wouldn’t you call that amazing dive to the outside done by Akira a spotty move?”

“Why of course I would, but it worked. Not only did it worked, but it was successful on Zyon, which makes it all the better.”

 

“Oh, well in any case Akira can’t win the title due to count out. So I’d say it’s best to keep the match in the ring.” Pete makes a grand point.

 

The wounded youth rolls to a kneeling position trying to regain his thoughts. Akira though perches himself on the ring apron, inviting himself to dethrone Zyon of his title. Panting and moving in and out of consciousness, Zyon spotlights the Divine Wind as the challenger springs off the top rope. With pain circulating through out his body, Zyon leaps into the air from his crouched position, extending both feet in the direction of the elevated Akira Kaibatsu. While his eyes grow to the size Dante Culpepper’s contract, Akira does his best to avoid the hurt coming his way…

 

…But fails.

 

“CRACK!”

 

“OOOOOOOOOO!”

 

The crowd echoes in unison as Akira falls to the mat lifeless, a victim of the always dangerous SNAP front dropkick! The air completely drained from his body, the Divine Wind can best be described as a prune, while the Unique Youth can best be described as a man with a second chance.

 

“YEEEEAAAAHHH!”

 

The Xcel Energy Center erupts as Zyon pulls himself back to his feet via a kip up!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Only to crumble back to the mat, clutching his back!

 

“See Pete, even little moments of flash takes so much out of Zyon. It’s just a matter of time now.”

 

Despite King’s comments, Zyon picks himself up off the mat. Staring down at his opponent, Zyon lifts the honorable Japanese import back to his feet, pulling him into the Decline!!!

 

“Zyon is going for a homerun. The reverse Russian leg sweep could do the trick.”

 

Rather or not Pete would be right in his assumption is never realized as Akira launches an elbow at the temple of his opponent. Zyon staggers to the side, bouncing off the ropes and flying back with an airborne forearm. Slicing Akira across the face with the desperate strike, Zyon bends behind his opponent locking him in a reverse waist lock. Dazed from the leaping forearm, Akira is defenseless against the champion, who hurls the challenger backward with a sloppy German suplex. Pointing his toes to the mat, Zyon clasps on to Akira, attempting to bridge up.

 

ONE…collapse.

 

“King you could very well be right. Zyon couldn’t even bridge the German suplex because of his back.”

 

Visibly hurting, Zyon pulls himself back to his feet, along with dragging Akira back to his. Wanting to chain his moves together, Zyon launches a boot toward the sternum of his opponent. Instead, his foot ends up in the clutches of the challenger. Cautiously, Zyon hops around on one foot searching for an openly. Focusing on Akira’s head, the youth throws a brutal enziguri that terrorizes the air it floats through. Realizing Akira ducked the shot, Zyon prepares a rebound…only to find himself reeled in by the Divine Wind. Smoothly, Akira falls backward latching on to the youth, bringing him down back first against his knees!!!

 

“I love me some lung blower!” King smiles.

 

“As perverted as that sounds King, the lung blower is definitely effective in the current situation.”

 

Coughing, twitching, and spazing the youth rolls around on the mat, clutching his back. Trying desperately to catch his breath, Zyon claws his way back to his wobbly feet. Scheming another comeback, Zyon rubs his back while searching for the hidden Akira Kaibatsu. Conspicuously absent after such a painful move, Akira safely watches Zyon rummage around for the man perched on the top rope!!!! Terrified by his discovery, the youth twists around just as the Divine Wind leaps off the top rope, scissoring his legs around the champion’s head. Realizing that Akira’s greed for outperforming Zyon on the midcard stage has left an opening on the Divine Wind, Zyon staggers backward before snapping forward with a power bomb…FOOL! Akira’s head bounces off the mat, turning the Asian’s skin a suburban pale. Weakened from the attacks on his back, Zyon collapses against the middle rope…exiting to the outside.

 

“YEEEEAAAAHHHH!”

 

The crowd erupts as Zyon s…l…o…w…l…y ascends the ropes. Seemingly, clutching his back every few seconds, Zyon perches himself on the top rope placing himself in a fatal do or die situation. Noticing the Divine Wind’s lack of movement, Zyon decides to go for it! Soaring through the air, Zyon arches his back/shoulder blade region looking like a magnificent swan. Determining that he has the match won, the Unique Youth triumphantly flips crushing the CANVAS with a fantastic FINAL FLASH!!!!

 

“OH NO!” Pete yells.

 

Akira lies to the side of Zyon lucky to still be in the match.

 

“That idiot Zyon just hurt his back even more because of that AWESOME fifty/fifty spotty style he does so well, HAHAHAHA!” King chuckles.

 

Hurrying back to his feet, Akira struggles to lift the youth into a front face lock position. A moment later, the Divine Winds succeeds in the struggle, hoisting Zyon into the air, and dropping him on his face with a forward suplex. Not one to kill time, Akira immediately leaps on to the second rope before jumping off, CRUSHING Zyon with a Senton Bomb…to the back!!!

 

“GAH…”

 

Zyon trails off as the Divine Wind in an obvious rush, flips Zyon over, attempting a lateral press.

 

ONE!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREE!!!!

 

YENOOOOOOO!!!

 

“NEW CHAMPION…hey wait a minute. That was three you idiot.”

 

“Referee Nick Soapdish says it’s only two.”

 

Beneath the mask, Akira is certainly beside himself as he rigorously stairs at the canvas. His eyes burning with the will to win, Akira looks over toward his shouting manager.

 

“Finish Him!!!”

 

Mr. Kobe erupts. The Divine Wind nods, forcing Zyon back to his feet, directly into a neck vice. Calming his spirit so he doesn’t overshoot the move like he once did before, Akira sprints forward, running off the turnbuckle, and…

 

…

 

…

 

…Is thankfully tossed backward!!!

 

“He countered it!”

 

Dejected, Akira lands on his feet. With nothing left to lose, the Divine Wind charges aimlessly toward the Unique Youth. Zyon also stumbles his way toward his opponent, performing the slowest slide through the legs ever. The lack of speed distracted many of the on lookers, as few are able to point out that Zyon has Akira in a pump handle position!!!

 

“YEEEAAAHHH…OOOOO!”

 

The fans’ excitement falters as Akira locks his foot behind Zyon’s, taking him to the mat with a beautiful drop toe hold counter. Instantaneously, Zyon pushes himself back to his feet with no idea on what to do next.

 

“This is awesome!”

 

The crowd chants, truly in love with the match. Ignoring the crowd’s respectful chant, Zyon wildly turns and swings, looking to hit anything within a few feet…like his opponent for instance. The Divine Wind, briskly ducks, locking his arm around Zyon’s. The two lock arms, jousting for a backslide of all things. Fatigued, either man could easily give in, but neither complies to do so.

 

“Look King, it’s not about spots now. This is about pride.”

 

“And all this time I thought it was for the cruiserweight title.”

 

Zyon’s visual expressions are a lot more noticeable since he you know doesn’t wear a mask. The youth grinds his teeth, twitching as sweat drips into his eyes. Akira looks to be winning the struggle as he takes a firm step forward. The Unique Youth refuses to give up without a fight, stomping forward in his direction. The veins in both individual’s arms look ready to bust open as neither man gains an inch of ground. Flopping his hair out of his eyes, the look of determination exits the youth’s facial features!!!

 

“Ha, he gave up.” King remarks.

 

Akira with all of the momentum flips Zyon over his back. Unhooking one arm, Zyon performs a back flip due to Akira’s constant pulling. Slickly, the Unique Youth hooks his arm around Akira’s head, kicking out his legs, and finally plunging the Divine Wind’s head into the mat in one destructive fluid motion!!!!!! Akira’s legs submissively wobble in one direction, while the rookie’s head spikes into the mat in another, a victim of one of the more DEADLIER DDTS THIS SIDE OF THE INSANE LUCHADORE! Falling on to the limp challenger, Zyon hopes for the best.

 

ONE!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREE!!!!

 

“HE GOT HIM!!!”

 

“DING DING DING!!!”

 

“The winner, and STILL SWF CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPION, ZYYYON!”

 

“Vitamin” plays over the PA system as the crowd erupts for a fantastic match. Mr. Kobe looks slightly disappointed, but understands his client gave it his all.

 

“What a match. It came down to the fact that sometimes you have to give a little to take a little.”

 

Pete is all sentimental as Zyon falls to the outside, clutching the title to his chest. Breathing heavily, Zyon can only smile knowing that for the first time in two weeks he did it the ring way.

 

FADE TO COMMERCIAL