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Sandman9000

Sandy's Job Hunt

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Here is where I post the best radio ads I've seen lately and wonder why they won't return my calls. Okay? Okay!

 

Positive Hits-Z88.3 and RadioY.com, owned and operated by Central Florida Educational Foundation, Inc., a non-profit Christian organization, is in search of a highly motivated, detail-oriented, energetic and dependable team player that eats breathes and sleeps donor relations. A degree with an emphasis in Public Relations or 3 to 5 years comparable experience is preferred.

Please submit resume’ and a cover letter containing a brief personal testimony or statement of your faith in Christ, to:

 

Human Resources

Positive Hits-Z88.3

1065 Rainer Drive

Altamonte Springs, FL 32714-3847

 

Or, email: [email protected] For more details please go to the Employment link at Zradio.org. No phone calls please. Minorities and women are encouraged to apply. EOE. Posting end date: 6/9/2006

 

I don't see how "Christian broadcasting" and "sleep donor relations" goes together. Oh wait, now I do.

 

 

 

Oldies 700, WGZS, EOE is searching for a SALES GURU to head up it's sales team in DOTHAN, ALABAMA! Beautiful town, laidback, needs a FIRECRACKER TO POUND THE STREETS looking for business! Are YOU a go-getter? Are you just a little 'different' then your co-workers? Do you think outside the box but can still make it work right for our clients? CAN YOU DRIVE A PROMOTION OUT OF THE PARK? If that is YOU, RUSH your resume RIGHT NOW to JOHN at [email protected]

 

If you want to work SMARTER instead of harder, E-MAIL it TODAY! Don't wait this position will NOT last long!

 

WGZS is an EOE.

 

Apparently, when you WORK FOR AN OLDIES station, you have to RANDOMLY CAPITALIZE SHIT so that the old people CAN READ them!

 

 

 

Understand please that this position WILL NOT transition into full-time news anchor or reporter at KSL. It is intentionally designed. You will continue to kick serious can in both roles, unless and until you are promoted to news management or take a job at KFI.

 

So, I can take a job where they tell me up front that there's no hope of promotion? HOT DAMN HERE'S TWENTY OF MY RESUME JOB NOW PLZZZZZZ!

 

 

 

Ok, so we can’t hire you to live and work in the Cayman Islands, but we still want you to be a part of our team.

 

Well, fuck you too then.

 

 

 

99X in Atlanta is looking for an individual or team to wake-up one of the nation's premiere cities. If you are a Howard wanna be, you go for the low hanging fruit and you still think strippers in the studio are good radio, you are not our show...although Sirius might hire you. If you think you have the goods to help 5 million people navigate mind-numbing traffic every morning, read on.

 

Let's take a little test. Question 1) Are you funny, creative and clever? Question 2) Have you ever been before a Grand Jury? Question 3) Do you enjoy live reads?

 

If you or your show answered yes to question #1 why the hell are you in radio? If you're totally confused send your package to: Rob Roberts, Chief Career Counselor, Cumulus Atlanta, 780 Johnson Ferry Road, 5th Floor, Atlanta GA 30342. Please don't send cookies or small pets.

 

Cumulus Broadcasting is an Equal Opportunity Employer

 

I don't even know where to begin here. I will say that I'm shocked that a radio station won't accept baked goods. When anyone brings desert into where I work, we hover around it like vultures until we all strike.

 

 

 

I'll post more later. I have a long day of working part-time ahead of me tomorrow.

 

EDIT: Pretend the quote function works. I have no clue why it doesn't, other then that it's Mole's fault.

 

Fixed quotes tags. -Mod

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So, the Sandman uses Allaccess? Radio vet, here, been in since I was 15. keep pluggin'

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Best of luck Sandy, I don't know how the radio market is over there, but I've been in radio for two and a half years now, and I'm still trying to break into the larger stations.

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More ads from jobs that won't give me the time of day.

 

David Letterman – Condoleezza Rice – Joe Montana

 

All came through Indiana on their way to success! Coincidence? We think not.

 

Ironically enough, all three had their greatest success when not in Indiana. I think I can skip that middle step.

 

And notice how I didn't even make an Alfdogg joke!

 

 

 

Over the next 3 months we will be losing some people due to family matters, so we will be looking for at least 2 new people.

 

Successful candidates will have an airshift and could possible also serve as Prod Dir, Imaging Dir or even Assistant PD. We want the right people on the air, and then we'll see if you have interest in other areas, so the aircheck you send is all-important.

 

We are looking for warm, mature, friendly adult communicators for our 3-time Station of the Year KXOJ in Tulsa, OK. If you love the midwest, great pay and a winning environment send your tape and resume to [email protected] EOE. No Calls please.

 

I was wondering where the AIDS Monster had wandered off to. Guess we found him.

 

 

Media sales experience a huge plus, so is being from the southern shore area of New Jersey and knowing your way around our beaches!

 

Folks, being from Jersey is never a positive in anything. Don't let this ad fool you.

 

 

 

Radio Announcer Wanted In Heaven

Drive Time Air talent wanted for an award-winning family-oriented Hot AC radio station in northeastern Vermont.

 

Well, that's a blatant lie.

 

 

 

 

More of these as my resume becomes the best punchline in the industry.

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Here's more jobs where I probably don't meet the qualifications, despite being smarter then half the station put together. Or at least the person writing the ad.

 

Long Island’s Number One Hit Music Station 106.1 BLI is looking for a “super producer!” Faster than a speeding bullet when it comes to coming up with ideas and booking the hottest celebrity guests and interviews. More powerful than a locomotive when it comes to dealing with the pressure of a live show, producing and executing major market on-air bits. We are building a winning morning show and we need someone with a winning attitude. Are you a prep machine? Have incredibly strong production skills? Are you a self starter with strong organizational skills? Do you know how to relate things to 18-34 year old women? Have you been called a radio geek at least once in your life?! Then we want to talk to you. We want passionate people live for the show and will do whatever it takes to win.

 

Here are some other “super powers” we’d like to see:

 

Great at screening calls

Producing morning show remotes/events

Great computer skills

Edit digitally and build an audio library

Writing skills a plus/being funny even better

A big old rolodex with contacts would rock

 

Please, we need “super producer” right away so if you think this is you, email us NOW at [email protected] or mail us your stuff to 106.1 BLI, 555 Sunrise Highway West Babylon, NY 11704. Attn: Nancy Cambino

 

We are an EOE employer and encourage qualified people from all backgrounds to inquire.

 

Last I heard, being "super" in Long Island got you nothing but a broken jaw. Man, them times are a changin'.

 

 

 

Part-time call screeners needed for liberal talk radio network, Air America Radio. Must be articulate, have great phone etiquette and have basic interest in current events. Resumes are to be submitted to Michael Shapira at [email protected] Piquant, LLC is an equal Opportunity Employer.

 

They have listeners, much less listeners who want to call? Wow.

 

 

 

If you are versatile, have at least one year of experience, reliable and wanna WIN!!!

 

Apparently jobs are prizes now. Too bad the market is the crane game.

 

 

 

Time Is Running Out For You To Get Us Your Stuff To Be Considered To Be The Next Night Star On 93.5 The Wolf In Evansville, Indiana. Can You Give Us A Country Night Show With CHR Attitude? Send Your Aircheck And Resume To [email protected] South Central Radio Is An Equal Opportunity Employer!!!

 

Why am I not surprised it's the Indiana station that greatly offends my eyes? 0-2 for Indiana, 0-2,000,000 if I count Alfdogg.

 

 

 

KOVC--Dakota Country Network, based in Valley City, ND, as a full-time opening in our evening on-air position. The shift is from 5-9 p.m., and has included a two hour sports-talk show from 5-7. It could continue for the right person. Other duties include high school football and basketball play-by-play, production, paid remotes, and we'd like some versatility, as we are on the grow soon.

 

Good salary, paid vacation, every other weekend off, and other perks and benefits available. This position will open in 2 1/2 weeks, so I need to hear from you now. E-mail to [email protected] or snail to KOVC 136 Central Ave. N, Valley City, ND, 58072. Of course, EOE.

 

Christ, I might actually go for this...

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Guest Felonies!
Part-time call screeners needed for liberal talk radio network, Air America Radio. Must be articulate, have great phone etiquette and have basic interest in current events. Resumes are to be submitted to Michael Shapira at [email protected] Piquant, LLC is an equal Opportunity Employer.

 

They have listeners, much less listeners who want to call? Wow.

No. No, they really don't.

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