Clusterfuck emergency rescue thread

[Toxxic 0]

We got no Fucks.

 

NOTHING.

 

Not a single Clusterfuck.

 

Not even a 'Boom, explosion'.

 

Seriously people, this shit is bad. We don't want to do a show with no Clusterfuck, that's the point of the show, that's the name of the show.

 

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, has until 7pm EST Sunday 27th to get something in. ANYTHING in. The door is wide open again, please please please write SOMETHING and get it to either me or Landon so we can at least pretend there are still people interested in this fed.

[King Cucaracha 0]

Yeah, I should say we know the Clusterfuck's pretty intimidating to most people (obviously not me) and we're not surprised or even that disappointed in the lack of participation, because let's face it that happens every year. We're not gonna cuss you all out for not writing the hardest match of the year... even if you did have an entire month.

 

But, this is an opportunity for somebody. So, please take it.

 

Please?

[muzz 0]

Nah.

[Toxxic 0]

I'd settle for 'Boom, explosion, everyone dies but Wes Davenport'.

 

Fuck it, that'd win, hands down.

[Mr. S£im Citrus 0]

If Johnny were anywhere to be found, I'd probably be willing to do a co-write with him, but my match against Landon Dance Dance Dragon wasn't as easy for me to write as I figured it would have been beforehand, and I'm too drained after writing that to try and take on the 'Fuck by myself, too.

[muzz 0]

If it turns out no one has written when I get home I might do something.

 

But Chance Silver will be winning.

[Toshiaki Koala 0]

I... think I might be able to write something. But only if people watch my movie.

[Smartly Pretty 0]

My match is in.

[Retard Girl 0]

hmm, maybe i should have attempted to write one, instead of asking for some hardcore jobber match. who cares if the n00b winning is weird, it would have ruled XD

[The Amazing Rando 0]

Too bad I couldn't send in my loser 2004 one, featuring the final three of Alan, MVS, and Janus. I remember hearing back that it was better than Johnny Dangerous' at the time (although he was entrant 20 or something, maybe like 17, I just remember "it's a bunch of nothing, and then Johnny Dangerous shows up")

 

 

I mean, I liked what I wrote at the time, but it was definitely "we know you would have gotten called up to the SWF eventually, but the SJL closed so now you have to sharpen your skills by going against really, really good writers". That was a rough year, eight month feud with Landon aside. Every person I wrote against either no-showed, was a n00b like Toxxic (and his n00b-ish ways lasted less time than Charlie Matthews' did in the JL), or completely destroyed me without breaking a sweat.

 

Speaking of, that year got the awesome Grappler CF win and subsequent FTF match that ended with "pop the crowd like a fucking cherry" which is forever one of the greatest written lines in the fed ever.

[Smartly Pretty 0]

My prediction: WC. Or me. Me or WC.

[Bruce Blank 0]

[King Cucaracha 0]

Clusterfuck is up, next card being worked on at the moment. Thanks to those who made the effort to bail us out at the end.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

...holy (bleep).

 

 

If that was who I think it was, I love him mucho.

 

oh, and congrats to the other people. (non-spoiler celebratory stuffz)

[Mr. S£im Citrus 0]

My prediction: WC. Or me. Me or WC.

Not sure why you thought I was in the mix... I pretty much said that the only way I'd be writing a second match was if Johnny showed up to help me write it... And you ought to know better than that by now...

[Smartly Pretty 0]

I guess I was just rooting for you.

[Mr. S£im Citrus 0]

Not sure that would have been a good idea, either: even if I had written, I wouldn't have booked myself to win; my concept for the 'Fuck involved having Bruner eliminate, like, 14 people, with Dace ultimately going over in the end.