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Guest Tzar Lysergic

The NFL Preseason Thread.

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Guest Vitamin X

Thattaboy, Aaron. Looking just like Brett out there, throwing picks as well as touchdowns but completing 9 for 15 for 117 in the process. They need some help blocking though, apparently. Yikes.

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Few things:

 

Willis McGahee is out until at least week 1 after surgery on his knee, so Ray Rice is gonna get an extended look in the preseason and probably the start in week 1 for the Ravens vs the Bengals.

 

NFL Network is carrying the Jets/Redskins game Saturday live. I wonder why..

 

Halftime Enterntainment at this years Super Bowl is Bruce Springsteen supposedly.

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John Lynch is visiting the Patriots today. Lynch is my favorite Buc ever and I'd like to see him land somewhere if he still wants to play, but it would pain me to see him in a Patriots uniform.

 

Anyone got any early song predictions for the Springsteen Super Bowl halftime show? I'm thinking he might go more the Prince route and cover a lot of territory with songs both predictable and obscure, rather than the Stones/McCartney/Tom Petty "big recognizable hits plus one recent song" formula. I'd like to see "Glory Days" with Brett Favre on tambourine. I really would.

 

 

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Chad Johnson seeks to legally change his name

 

Emotionally combustible wide receiver Chad Johnson has already made plenty of noise this season. First, he demanded to be traded. Then he caved on his own demands. Then he threatened to bring Dade County on the general populace.

 

Ocho Cinco

 

But now — according to Michael David Smith at PFT — he is going to make everyone remember him and his number 85 forever. And no, he is not getting one of those hip new skull tatts that are all the rage now. Instead, he is going to legally change his name to “Ocho Cinco”. Thank you, Jebus.

 

Well, he might change it. He certainly wants to change it, so he can permanently wear “Ocho Cinco” on his uniform, which, you might recall, the NFL has previously fined him for doing. However, if his real name is “Chad Ocho Cinco” …

 

We’ve learned that Johnson has taken the first steps in the state of Florida toward legally changing his last name to Ocho Cinco. Seriously.

 

If Johnson follows through on this, his actual, legal name will be Chad Ocho Cinco, and the NFL would then (we assume) allow him to put his new last name on the back of his jersey.

 

From a business standpoint, this might be Chad’s way of picking up some of the extra cash that he wants to make but that the team has said it won’t give him. The jersey would instantly become one of the NFL’s top sellers, and NFL players get a cut of all sales of their jerseys.

 

So all that’s really left would be Roger Goodell’s approval. And as we all know, Goodell is a big fan of things that involve fun in any way. It would make a little bit of sense though, because, as MDS pointed out, the NFL would straight rake in jersey sales. But then again, Goodell would be opening up the floodgates to all kinds of crazy jersey and name changes.

 

On the bright side though, we could all finally get those #12 “DIEFARVEDIE” Green Bay Packers jerseys we’ve been wanting for so long.

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Guest Vitamin X

Except even Fucking Wisconsinites know how to spell Favre.

 

And speaking of which, a Wisconsin family held their own special way of tributing Favre's legacy...

 

burning3.jpg

WAUKESHA COUNTY - A Waukesha County family is not happy with Brett Favre.

 

The Stark family created a video that shows them burning all their Brett Favre memorabilia, before roasting marshmallows over the fire and toasting Aaron Rodgers and the Packers.

 

“We thought it’d be a way to express ourselves surrounding the Favre controversy,” Charlie Stark said.

 

Ted Stark and his two sons, Charlie and Jack are featured in the video. They say they were tired of Favre’s waffling.

 

“I call him Brat Favre now. He flip flops. He can’t get enough attention,” Jack Stark said.

 

Ted’s sons say they won’t be cheering for Favre and the Jets.

 

“I’m gonna have to say no. We’re former fans,” Charlie and Jack said.

 

Dad says he will continue to cheer for Favre.

 

“I hope the best for Brett. I just hope he stops before he regrets it,” Ted Stark said.

 

One thing’s for sure: the trio will strongly support the Packers and Aaron Rodgers.

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Guest Cal Moriarty
Anyone got any early song predictions for the Springsteen Super Bowl halftime show? I'm thinking he might go more the Prince route and cover a lot of territory with songs both predictable and obscure, rather than the Stones/McCartney/Tom Petty "big recognizable hits plus one recent song" formula. I'd like to see "Glory Days" with Brett Favre on tambourine. I really would.

Oh, no way will he cover territory. "Radio Nowhere," "Born in the U.S.A.," "Glory Days," and as your finale, "Born to Run." He's not going to bust out "Rosalita" or "Kitty's Back." Does he even have that energy in him anymore? Boy, maybe if we're lucky, we'll get "Hungry Heart," "Badlands," or "Blinded by the Light" in the setlist.

 

In the new era of play-it-safe halftime shows, I'd say that McCartney was quite enjoyable, the Stones were creaky and bad and sucked major dong, Prince was a blast, and Tom Petty was reliably great because that's his thing. In alligator notation, 41 > 42 > 39 > 40. Springsteen will be predictable and a just little bit feeble, bringing Petty's familiarity without the same enjoyment, though in no way as awful as the mincing decrepit bodies we're calling the Rolling Stones these days.

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The Ravens very quietly signed Lorenzo Neal to a 1 year contract. Hes been the FB in front of 11 straight 1,000 yard rushers and was in Cam Cameron's system when they were out in SD. I think its a real good move if theres any doubt as to McGahee's status past the opener, as Ray Rice had a lot of problems in the first preseason game. Im starting to think that McGahee, who came to camp not ready and out of shape, might need more time than even the first game to be ready to start, and the first couple of games could end up being a mix between them both with Ray Rice eventually settling in as the 3rd down back.

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A league source tells us that the Patriots have agreed to terms with safety John Lynch.

 

Lynch, a nine-time Pro Bowler, could assume the role that the team was exploring for Tank Williams, who recently landed on injured reserve with a knee injury. Williams had been practicing at linebacker.

 

At this stage of his career, Lynch probably is a better fit playing closer to the line of scrimmage. Besides, the team already has a Lynch-style safety in Rodney Harrison.

 

cry2.gif

 

My Hatriotism aside, Lynch seems very much like Belichick's type of guy on defense.

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That's actually exactly what I was thinking, although I'd throw "slow" in there as well. I'm not sure how this helps their secondary any, although they're the goddamn rat bastard Patriots so I'm sure it won't end up mattering.

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Eagles punter Sav Rocca is credited with an interception on a fake field goal gone awry; Richard Marshall for Carolina busted through the line, grabbed the "pass" and ran it back for a TD.

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I see that Dennis Dixon got extensive playing time in the Buffalo/Pittsburgh game tonight. Fairly pedestrian passing numbers, but 2 rushes for something like 54 yards and a TD. The fuck are they going to do with that guy?

 

 

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I see that Dennis Dixon got extensive playing time in the Buffalo/Pittsburgh game tonight. Fairly pedestrian passing numbers, but 2 rushes for something like 54 yards and a TD. The fuck are they going to do with that guy?

 

Numbers don't tell the story, Dixon only had really 2 bad passes, most of the imcompletetions weren't his fault.

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Thanks to my fiancee, I just got season opener tickets for my Seahawks against the Bills. 50 yard line, right behind the Seahawks bench!

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“I call him Brat Favre now. He flip flops. He can’t get enough attention,” Jack Stark said.

 

Says the guy who called the media to his backyard to watch him burn stuff.

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“I call him Brat Favre now. He flip flops. He can’t get enough attention,” Jack Stark said.

 

Says the guy who called the media to his backyard to watch him burn stuff.

 

What a waste of money. I wouldn't burn any of his stuff. I didn't watch the Jets game but I heard Favre did well.

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Marvin's top 4 Ravens game highlights

 

1 - Ray Rice's sweet 42 yard run to set up his first TD.

2 - Derrick Martin's int of Josh David Booty for a TD.

3 -Probably getting on TV (It was in the 3rd QTR right after the Vikings made it 23-7) NFL HD Replay on Monday at 4, I was wearing an O's hat and waving so I should stand out.

4 : (I was going to draw an arrow to point out the point of the pic but I forgot and uploaded it and Im too lazy to redo it, so figure it out for yourselves..)

 

czechravensdj7.jpg

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Guest Vitamin X

NFL Network guy: HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THAT FAT BALD GUY! Let's get him on the TV, what an excellent representation of Baltimore-area douchebags that would actually attend a Ravens preseason game!

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