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RepoMan

Halloween Candy

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Mounds aren't bad, but Almond Joy is better.

 

I'd take that bet Czech, but more than likely it's because an employee took it off the shelf to reclaimation, which doesn't disprove your theory that nobody will buy it.

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I'm going to go to the grocery store, mark the front bag of Mounds with a Sharpie, come back in a week, and see if it's gone. I bet it's not. I BET IT'S NOT.

 

When I was driving a bread delivery truck last fall, we got some ridiculous bread for a promo. I don't even remember what it was, but it was some ridiculous amount of grain. This post isn't to discuss the merit of multigrain bread (which I don't like as a rule), but 200 grains are too many.

 

Anyway, the other guys at my depot and I agree that we weren't likely to sell too many, so we all ordered a dozen per store, which we thought would suffice for the week.

 

It more than sufficed. The first Sobey's sold one, the other twelve went bad. The second Sobey's (site of my fist pump over Pavarotti's death, no less) sold none. In fact, when I visited them a week later, there were thirteen on the shelf. How the hell was there one more? Would someone really buy a loaf of bread from one store and return it twenty kilometres up the road? I had planned on devising a similar scheme to Czech's but never did. I quit the job a few weeks later, the catalyst being equally ridiculous.

 

No Frills had ordered fifteen-or-so boxes of fruitcakes, which arrived for delivery on an already busy day. I said "the hell with it, I'll bring 'em tomorrow. Who needs fruitcake in October that urgently?" My boss called me and told me hightail it back to the depot and bring them, lest they be stolen by the warehouse employees. By the way, the warehouse was primarily for the LCBO. And also something by Mott's.

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Guest C*Z*E*C*H

Candy corn let me down today. I saw some caramel candy corn next to the regular kind, and thought "oh, this could be positively awful. Or not!" Against my better judgment, I bought a bag, but it turned out that they were wretched. Just wretched. The texture didn't feel right: caramel is smooth and chewy, not crumbly. Just like mint Skittles, it felt stale. Buy caramel. Buy candy corn. Don't buy caramel candy corn.

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All this talk of US Smarties, Rockets, Candy Corn and Wafers sounds like a 2008 rerun of "Bad Candy". It's fun stuff though, so carry on.

 

Worst Halloween Candy: Bible verses, Unicef pennies, and raisens.

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Smarties are good.

 

And I'll take those black/orange wrapped ones, soft peanut butter taffy. It's fantastic. I like it better than some stupid tootsie roll.

 

Those are Mary Janes, and they're horrid. And Czech is wrong about Mounds.

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Sweet Tarts, Smarties, or any candy similar to that used to make me gag. I still can't look at them to this day.

 

I am passing out this year Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, little fun-sized packages of M&M's, and Peppermint Patties.

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