Jump to content
TSM Forums
Sign in to follow this  

Awesome Apartment for Rent

Recommended Posts

****Didn't know where to post this, so if the mods want to move it then go for it.***


So I'm at work today and the person next to me mentions that they are looking around for a new apartment in Halifax when they stumble upon this awesome deal


Heathens need not apply


1 bedroom apt Central Halifax

Price: $480.00


Visits: 1949

Bathrooms (#): 1 bathroom

Pets Allowed: No


Address: Halifax, NS

Location: Halifax

Date Listed: 24-Mar-09


Available Immediately – Central Halifax – Showing Saturday and Sunday – Email for directions and additional information.


What kind of apartment is it?


• One bedroom basement apartment with separate entrance

• Tastefully decorated with modern décor

• Approximately 650 square feet

There is even a window! Security bars installed for your safety and to prevent unauthorized activity

• Closed circuit camera installed for security and safety. One in your suite, one at the entrance, and one in the exercise yard



• $480.00 per month

• First month’s rent + ½ month security deposit due at move in

• Small pet allowed with approval and payment of additional ½ month pet damage deposit

• One year lease permitted, option to renew lease at end of the term with no increase in rent

• LANDLORD’S SPECIAL! Move in before the 1st and don’t pay for the remainder of the month! That’s significant savings.


Included in the rent:


• Electricity

Heat – Maintained at 21 degrees with lock box to prevent unauthorized tampering. Additional heating available for $20.00 per extra degree of heating per month. You may not use your oven to heat the apartment. If you do, you will be fined $50.00 per occurrence.

• Air conditioning – Maintained at 25 degrees during the summer with lock box to prevent extra cooling from being dispensed. Additional cooling for sale for $20.00 per degree of cooling requested per month.

• 25" Zenith color television set with basic cable service - INCLUDED IN RENT!

• Wireless internet (with content filter applied to block forbidden/immoral websites) - INCLUDED IN RENT!

• Provision of coin laundry services - You will have your own personal coin laundry washer and dryer machines. Washers and dryers are paid using a token system. Tokens can be purchased through the landlord. Washer tokens cost $4.15 each and dryer tokens cost $3.60 each. You are not allowed to use foreign

currency or slugs in the washer and dryer. Violators will be fined $100.00 per infraction.


About us: (Landlords)


We are conservative, bible believing, God-fearing, born again, evangelical Christians. We interpret the bible literally in every way possible. We live a strict moral code and observe God’s laws in our everyday life. My wife stays at home and teaches our home-schooled children. I work as a pastor at a local congregation and am active in the faith community.


About you: (Tenant)


• You are employed

• You do not participate in lascivious deviant sexual behavior

• You do not choose alternative lifestyles as your lifestyle

• You do not have any criminal history

• You must have excellent character references

• You do not smoke, drink or take drugs. Mandatory drug screening required.



Additional Rules/Conditions:


CLEANLINESS: You are responsible for the cleanliness and orderliness of

your apartment. Beds are to be made before leaving your suite,

countertops must be wiped down, and you must remove all trash. Upon

inspection, if the tenant's basement suite is not clean, the cost of

cleaning services plus a fine of $100.00 will be levied.


LIGHTS: The lights in your basement suite and in the day room are not to

be tampered with. If a light needs repair, report the condition to the



WAKE-UP: Wake up will be at 5:30am each morning. All ceiling lights in

the suite will be turned on automatically.


LIGHTS OUT: Ceiling lights in the suite will be turned off at 11:30pm.


CONTRABAND: The following items are considered contraband – alcohol, illegal drugs, tobacco, weapons, lock picking equipment. If any contraband is discovered to be in your possession, you will be subject to a minimum $1,000.00 fine. In addition, your items will be confiscated permanently. Second offense – you will be evicted without notice. A bailiff will escort you and your belongings off the premises. Your security deposit will not be returned.


SMOKING: The basement suite is non-smoking. Anyone in possession of

tobacco products of any kind or any lighter or matches, will have their

contraband items confiscated and will be fined $100.00.


INSPECTIONS: The Landlord will conduct unannounced inspections to ensure

that these rules and regulations are being followed.


VISITATION: Visitation periods will be on Saturdays and Sundays from

1:00 p.m. until 3:00 p.m. All visitors and their vehicles are subject

to search while on landlord property. Refusal to allow a search can

result in their being barred from all future visitation privileges. All

visitors must sign the Visitor's Log. Unauthorized visitors will be

escorted from the property, and the tenant will be fined $250.00.


I.D. BRACELETS: Each tenant will be issued an I.D. bracelet with his/her

photograph. It must be worn at all times. If you lose your I.D.

bracelet or it is broken, you will be required to purchase a new one at

the nominal cost of $5.00.


EXERCISE YARD: The tenant will have access to the exercise yard in the

area to the back of the property for 2 hours per day from 4:00 pm to

6:00 pm. The tenant is not allowed to bring any personal property to

the exercise yard. Once the tenant leaves the exercise yard on a

particular day, he or she may not return. No boisterous behavior is

allowed in the exercise yard. There is no smoking allowed in the

exercise yard. Minimum fine for exercise yard infractions is $50.00.



I started to bold all of the ridiculous parts of the ad, but then it felt like I was bolding everything in the listing

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

So basically they want you to pay $480 a month to live in prison? Interesting approach.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this