Stephen Joseph

1) Interview in ring to open the show (I hope) 2) Backstage skit with Puerto 3) Backstage confrontation with Hoff 4) Brief meeting with Bill Watts and Donald Trump!

Umm, yeah, I just , yeah, What KC said, on all accounts.

Stephen Joseph is back, and Helddown will go on the air live at 8PM with Stephen Joseph in the ring! What is this about? Why was Stephen Joseph in the stands last week? Will Stephen Joseph be at Anglemania? How is his relationship with TPR? Will he ever get a damn life? Tune in and find out!

I think I need a box of Kleenexes now

Actually, we had wildly orgasmic sex. Was it not that good for you C Dub?

huh whats going on now?

The camera switches to the back , where HOFF~! is chatting on his cell phone in the garage area. HOFF Yeah, I'll get to that. No worries. (Stephen Joseph steps into view, sipping on a Guinness!) HOFF Call you back Stephen Joseph You do that. Hey buddy. I just wanted to say thank you (Hoff is taken aback, expecting a fight) HOFF Why? Stephen Joseph You saved my career. You dropped your ball, left in a poo poo fit, and all of a sudden, ole SJ was world champ, and now the people just LURVE me! Ain't that the shit. Here I was doing everything to position myself to win the title, which you all hated. And voila~! you, YOU, were responsible for my title reign Ain't karma a bitch? (Stephen Joseph laughs a bit and walks off) HOFF This ain't over POPICK!

I could straight up, but since Parka will come back someday when he's not so busy, why don't we make it a triple threat with two unknown contestants? I could pin an OAOVW guy we want to flesh out, Parka would lose the title and maybe the next HD Axel could fire him for letting SJ win a title. Then if Parka comes back...bam, ready made feud right there. SJ can go on to be the veteran defending the title against the young up and comers (the new SWF guys), defend it successfully at the next ppv following AM, then drop at the next to which SWF guy you all want. Gives me something to do after AM before the UP/ORG finishes, gives a new guy a story and a title or something?

Hey Zack, Patty Here's my idea. Let's capitalize with my angle ongoing. SJ's promo hints that he's gonna be at Anglemania. What if SJ captures the X title and drops it to one of the two new writers in a month or so? Give them the rub of beating a title and a world champ. SJ on paper is a former world champ, we can even get it into the Upstarts/Originals storyline. I'm needing someone to work with anyways, and I don't want to hold up PK, Axel or those guys too much now. Hmm?

48k is shitty money Government economists make double that

Treble, The yahoo draft is serpentine. SUWEET! My suggestion works to a charm. 2nd PICK! Thanks MJ. This will help us all by giving us a week to prepare. Now that we know what our draft order is, we can kind of guess who we will be able to get...

To go right before the title match Stephen Joseph You're the Puerto Rican, the baddest mofo wrestling today. Peter Knight's got nothing on you. He's a punk. He doesn't defend his belt. He wets his bed. He lusts for his mother. He's got an outie. He's a bitch Puerto, and what do we do to bitches? Tha Puerto Rican I smack my bitch up! Stephen Joseph Whoop Whoop! I can't wait Puerto. Soon, you'll join me in the hall of champions....IF YA (Tha Puerto Rican puts his hand up to Stephen's face) TPR That's my line. IF YA SMEELEELLLLLLL LLALLALAALALAA WHAT THE PUERTO RICAN>>>> IS COOOKINGGGGGGG

Leena, you'd be the center of attention down in Panama City

Well, my roommate is getting drunk every night at random clubs. Since I "work", I'm going out 1 night with him, but that's it.

I so badly want to see a Condi/Hillary race. Two shitty choices. It would be worth it just for the hilarity...because it doesn't matter who wins, the government's just gonna GET BIGGER. Maybe the LP would get 2% of the vote...

OAOAST HeldDOWN opens with, a shot of the ring? And a guy in it? Holy SHIT, are we gonna see wrestling? Nope. Another promo. AnglePlex, Superstar, and the rest of the HATERZZZ roll in their retired graves, for its Numba 1 Stunna, the Most Hated Man in the History of the OAOAST, and YOUR former World Champion in the ring. It's Sizzle to the Jizzle Time! (I can't believe i just wrote that). Stephen Joseph Well HELLO! there everybody! Welcome to HeldDOWN! Crowd: YEEAAHH!!! Cole: Stephen Joseph came out here 10 minutes ago, just waiting for HeldDOWN to go live. We haven't seen him in the ring, since well, Anglepalooza. He was last seen here throwing a cup of beer into Hoff's face! Coach: He should've stayed gone. No one cares. Caboose: I'm as conflicted as I was on my girl after her high school prom. Do I, or don't I? Stephen Joseph Quit your jabbering, ya damn commentators. Let me speak, I'm paid millions for my mouth! ODALEY! ARRIBA LA...yeah okay...he sucks. And you know what else I heard. (in a Mexican voice) He sucks a little friend in the back, Holmes. A little Upstart flagpole, you know what I mean? Crowd: (groans in pain and laughter) Stephen Joseph (pacing the ring) Seriously folks. I feel great. I am so glad to be back, because I'm that much closer to getting rid of the Upstarts! Tony, Dan, even you Leon. Y'all come on down. Don't mind me, but I'm going to keep talking while you do. I gots something to speak on now. Now let me see here. Someone around here tried to retire me. Then,after I spent 3 months holding a title I defended well over 70 times, he spits on that and doesn't defend it at all. I don't count those damn jobbers a defense. Peter Knight, you make me fucking ashamed. Every Champion is this business out to be ashamed of you, you're pissing on the title by not defending it. Well that changes to NIGHT! Hey Tony. (Tony nods, and stands in a turnbuckle corner) You see, tonight, My best friend here, Tha PUERTO RICAN, gets his shot at the gold baby. Hey Dan (Dan stares, but goes over to Tony) It's going to be a beautiful...Whoa Leon...Back down...I'm not feuding with you, aight? (Leon huffs a bit, but backs down, and goes to a turnbuckle. All 3 eye Stephen Joseph suspiciously. Well good, you guys are all here. Ain't this a fucked up family. And I'm the black sheep ain't I. Well good. Now listen here fellas. I'm only saying this once, and I'm only offering this once. At one point in time, I ran this place the way I wanted to ran things. If I wanted to bury you, I did. If I wanted a PPV to go a certain way, it did. If I wanted IntenseZone to end with me, it ended with me. Everyone and their mother hates my fucking guts because I manipulated everyone for YEARS, and you all despise me for that to this day...except now, we're kind of allies of convience right? (They all kind of nod) Well, let me put this straight. The only reason why I did all that bullshit back in the day is because I thought I had to manipulate my way to the title. I only hated on Zack because he got an easy path, TWICE, to the title. I would never have gotten the title, except, someone, not naming any names or nothing, or someones, not naming any names, but I think Tony and Dan, you know these two guys very well...they took their ball and went home. They left the OAOAST in the vacuum. And thus came my opportunity, and I got myself into it, I had a chance, and I capitalized on it. I got what I've always wanted. So I'm telling you this. I'm through being a manipulator. I got the title because I was needed, and I had the opportunity. I see now that all I had to do was work with, and not against. What I'm getting to is this. I'm a son of a bitch. I'm an asshole. A jackass, a rat bastard. And I'm the only weapon you sons of bitches have right now that can counter Axel, the Upstarts, Drek, and Hoff. Because I'm like them. Zack...Zack was pure enough, good enough, to fight the good fight and beat them. Now he's shipped off overseas. They have you running. Leon is all tied up with Tha Puerto Rican , who may I remind you, is no fan of the Upstarts. You two guys now have to deal with Hoff and Drek. In the meantime, the rest of the Upstarts are consolidating. That ain't happening. PETER KNIGHT, you should've made sure I couldn't come back. Because Tonight, marks the beginning of the long march back for the Upstarts. I'm taking over, not because I'm gonna manipulate my way there, but because these guys recognize that I can Fuck YOU!!!! up. Until Zack gets back, I'm gonna organize, I'm gonna resist. Axel, you think you're so cute for pulling the Mick Foley magic papers? Bitch , please, when I was Commissioner I had so many damn papers like that, I got more holes in my contract than your mother's plugged,a and that's alot, because She's a HOOO!! And the FIRST thing I'd like to announce is that I'm a gonna be at ANGLEMANIA~! as the PAY PER VIEW COORDINATOR. That means that I can involve myself in any match, in any way, to ensure a fair playing field. And guess what? My contract supersedes yours, so suck on that Slappy! Hi Puerto. (The Puerto Rican has come to the ring) Leon. Puerto. I don't give a flying piece of shit what's going on between you too. At Anglemania, I am stepping back, and I won't be involved. But I need for you two to realize, that yes, we're on the same side of a MUCH bigger confliction. Shake his damn hand P. (Puerto looks at Leon in Disgust) SHAKE HIS GOD DAMN HAND! You want my help tonight or not? (Puerto is shocked at Joseph's outburst. He steps back, then steps once to Leon, and puts out his hand). Leon...shake his hand. (Leon looks over SJ, and PR, and motions SJ to back up. He does, and Leon steps forward once and loosely shakes PR's hand quickly, then wiping it on his pants). Stephen Joseph That's more like it. The Originals together again. Zackie baby, until you get your ass here, on your behalf, I'd like to finish with You Upstarts think you can destroy what we built for 5 long years? You want to take our baby away. Well come hell or high water, we gonna get you. Peter Knight, Axel, Hoff, Christian Jabroni, you wanna Fuck US? Well FUCK YOU!

Carnival Matt Young --What a fucking terrible choice. Matt Young eliminated me. Therefore I vote for Carnival, who is less of a douche. The Czech Republic Black Lushus --Easy. Czech hates my "Alpha Male" gimmick. Lushus is actually cool. Lushus CWM Hoff --Me and the lumberjack made peace. He's aight, plus I gotta vote for him for the kids. CWM Slayer Sass --Slayer entertains me more. Sass is a veteran. Plus he's a mod. Vote for Sass geniusmoment Zack Malibu --Zack, no explaination needed. KOAB alfdogg --Who the fuck is KOAD? Alfdogg Чэв kkktookmybabyaway --KKK, my brotha from another motha Niskie Rudo --Umm...Rudo?

AWW FUCK! I got beat by Matt Young. That's a fucking shame.

Fuck! How the hell do they have a new season after this one. Right now, we have Curtis Jack Buchanan Audrey Chloe As main characters who are still alive. Of those, Curtis, Jack and Chloe have been around the longest. One of these, or moore, I feel will bite the bullet. But who?

Scorpius, I never said that they deserved their fate. I'm merely not suprised by it, and I personally view their decision to go over there as pretty fucking stupid

Lurker's question Explain to me how, if this has been going on since the testing, why law enforcement never sought out the place. That bugs me.

I may be wrong, but my understanding was that the Christian missionaries that went over there willingly went into hostile territory to talk to the insurgency. I used the wrong word (helping). Sorry CWM. Going over there sans weapons and hoping that you aren't taken advantage of is a pretty dumb idea. Oh, and there's a great book about the evolution of the Islamic faith called "No God But God" By Reza Aslan.

Kotz, The Longshoremen's Union still has a stranglehold on Doc employment, so the employment affect is nil anyways. Besides, they were already owned by a foreign entity anyways, thus the unemployment whatever point is moot. But whatever C-Bacon posted, I subscribe too. Amazing no?

I could care less about Limbaugh, but going over to Iraq without weapons and helping the insurgents is a pretty dumb idea. Any rational human being would use such an act to their advantage. See kids? This is what happens when you let idealism become your shining light...instead of rationality? Smart person who is against the war protests here at home, talks to people about why they're against it Dumb person goes to Iraq to work with insurgents, to help them, and get captured and used as political bait. EDIT: Just because one is Muslim doesn't make them a barbarian. Islam is going through a reformation, something Christianity went through as well. That too, was bloody. To call them "Muslim" barbarians represents your complete lack of knowledge about whats really going on.

I'm thrilled about the social decay. It means that those of us who got to or are going through it have it that much easier of a time getting edit: errm respectable women. =)