Sandman9000

I'm thinking a more hypocritical Bill O'Reilly, just with even less beliefs to back my rants.

Will be funny when that catches up to you and can't hold a job due to explosive anger and end up as the guy on the street yelling at the sky. Actually, thanks to cable TV and talk radio, it most likely will make me a successful man.

I had a giant thing typed up, and then this piece of shit computer decides to go and freeze. Goddamn Murphy's Law. Basically, the only really concrete definitions about being straight edge are no drugs, no alcohol, no promiscious sex, and no tobacco. Even with that, there are still exceptions to those rules, such as communial wine and medical marijuana. Other people add on extra rules to that list. I add on no caffeine and no painkillers, since I'm hardcore or some shit. Also, I won't take drugs to combat whatever mental disorders I clearly have. Some people add on veganism to the list, but I like my fucking burgers, goddammit. No promiscious sex is again open to interpretation. Some people believe that means no sex until marriage, others believe that you should have a concrete definition of what your partner's name is before you two hook up. DuskTillDawn is a fellow XxX/sXe 'er, and he brags about his exploits with his girl until I threaten to mail him anthrax. As for me? I'll cross that line when really necessary. I don't believe in no sex until marriage, but I don't believe in just random hookups either. Pretty much, I'll nail my girlfriend, but I don't see me being fuck-buddys with some broad in the dorm.

Might as well establish this first. I'm not dead. I haven't been dead for however long I was gone. I also haven't tried to kill myself in some while (re: backyard wrasslin' and other stupid shite), though taking college chem was taking a razor vertically to the wrists of my GPA. I can't be the only one who despises the holiday season. Now, I can get into also the teenage angsty Linkin Parkish bullshit reasons, "I wanted a Super NES, my parents got me a Genesis, I fuckin' hate them" shit, but the real deal is that I hate celebrations. I hate parties, I hate award ceremonies, I hate meaningless causes for acting like a complete jackass, and the holidays are one of them. Whoooo, another date on the calendar, you haven't succeeded in having the black hole in your skull swallow your entire being, nor has your stupidy caused gravity to reverse and toss us all into the sun, whoop de damn do, who gives a fucking shit. Personally, as much as I could care less about my birthday, I'm somewhat glad it's around the holiday time, since it allows my cheapass moronic relatives to cop out and purchase one unwanted "gift" instead of two. I'd rather have none, but stupid society, requiring me to be "civil" about shit. Now, you may be thinking to yourself, "why doesn't this fucking useless asshole just quit his fucking bitching and not celebrate the holidays or actually go kill himself and stop wasting bandwidth and oxygen?" If I had my way, I would. Unfortunately, I'm not yet completely financially independent, hence I get to return to my parents for extended time periods during the year, where they still celebrate holidays and birthdays and other occasions designed to make me want to stab myself in the eye with a screwdriver. And since I don't like sleeping in a dumpster, I get to put up with birthdays and christmas and the whatnot. I tell them I want nothing, but they never listened to me before, so why start now. I also love the subtle hints in the gifts that are designed to remind me that I'm a complete failure in life who has accomplished nothing and will accomplish nothing. "Oh, Guiness book of world records, great. Hey, this book of inventions and accomplishments, wow. Lookie, a list of things that occured the day I was born, with nothing under my name, whoop de damn doo." But that's beside the point. From now on, this is what I'm going to do. By the time this shit rolls around next year, I'll be 21 (which means nothing to me, since I don't drink) and most likely living off campus, which means I won't have to go home, and if I do, it won't be for as long. I can tolerate a week with the relatives, but the three+ week winter break is too much. After a week and a half, two weeks if I'm lucky, my dad feels it necessary to remind me that I'm a constant underachiever who has only served to embarass the family on a constant basis and that I would have been better served to follow what he did in life and do things the way he does. When I do, I'm not telling anyone what I want, or to get me anything. I'm flat out telling them to get me nothing. And if they still feel compelled to get me something, they can reimburse me for something I bought myself. You say you wanted to get me a big gift? Pay my auto insurance, or I bought this video card, pay me back for that? Just a stocking stuffer? I went to Subway the other day, pay me back for my sandwhich. No clue on what to do? Gimme 20 bucks, I need gas. This way, morons feel like they've celebrated the holidays, I don't have to deal with useless bullshit, and children around the world can sleep safely at night. Once again, I'm sure you're wondering, "Is he constantly this angry and whiny and hateful and bitchy about shit?" Yes, you bet your ignorant ass I am. I pretty much hate everything, and I definitely hate you more than you hate me. And in case you need another reminder that I'm a sad motherfucker, don't make me post pics of me dressed up as Santa. Deranged Claus made sure that some 40 children found out that Santa's not real. Huss = the new "indeed." I'm done bitching for now. I'll have something else later. Happy holidays, dickheads.

Do X-mas presents count? Yes.

There will be no culture or religion in here on my watch. Anyone who disputes this ruling may file a motion with the judge. ::Loads shotgun:: I call mah boomstick "judge."

Ian probably just pays his deathmatch guys with weed.

There isn't enough violence in here. And I can't slaughter Rod, thanks to my probation. Ah well. ::Takes frustration out on Zack::

Means you outta leave. Again. ::Bootscrapes Kotz::

I thought I threw your ass out. ::Breaks a full bottle over Kotz's head and goes to work on his tricep with the shards::

I'm bouncing this shit. ::Kicks Kotz in the junk and throws him out through a window::

There's too much love in this thread. I don't like it. ::Beats Zack with a boat oar::

::walks in with birthday belt over shoulder. Lays the belt on the ground in front of NM. Goes through the Tony Mamaluke taunt sequence, and walks away::

You know what, I'm ending this shit. I'm taking all of your weapons away from you. I'm chemcially unbalanced. We all know that. What you don't know is that I suffer from clinical depression and paranoia. Angry one minute, happy the next, and constantly worried that every person in the world is gonna stab me in the back inbetween. Yeah, I fucking fell in love with Katie. Yeah, I'm fucking obsessed with her. Yeah, I lack the fucking balls to ever do anything about it. I'm physically unattractive. I'm a fat fuck. I'm an underachieving fuck who will never amount to anything in his goddamn life. I'm a sick demendted fuck who gets off on watching Nick Mondo take a weedwhacker to his stomach and wishes he could do the same. I'm a sick demendted fuck who writes stories with monsters raping dead corpses and passes them around in class, hoping the girls in the class like the metaphoprs. I'm a person who wants every single motherfucker in this goddamn world to hate him, just so he can justify feeling the same way about the rest of the world. I'm a psychopath who can't handle not getting his own way all of the time. I took a pair of scissors and cut my own arm and forehead open after Katie told me to leave her alone. I don't pretend to be insane. This isn't a fucking gimmick. This isn't Sandman9000, a fucking gimmick poster. This is a real life incarnate. Jacob Charles fucking Potter. The man your mother fucking warned you about. I staple dollar bills to my forehead because I enjoy the pain. I break glass over my body because the worst it hurts on the outside, the better it feels on the inside. I don't drink just because I'm a pussy, I don't drink because I know if I lose self-control, I'm gonna give into my deepest desires and kill myself. And above and foremost, I'm the worst human being on earth and I deserve to be killed. What's left Jay? What the fuck do you have left to use against me? Huh? What's next? Say I got a small dick? Say my mom's a whore? What now? You know what, when I stopped my journal, I said I was never gonna let anyoen into my head again. And I mean it. I considered you a friend man. We worked together, we joked around, you knoe me more then most people do, and I know you more. And it's fucking backfired on both of us, especially me. You know what I do best Jay. You know that when the going gets tough, I run the fuck away. Whenever I don't get my way, I burn my fucking bridges and run away. Hey, Jay, bitch, consider this fucking bridge burnt. Don't ever fucking talk to me or even refer to me ever again. I'm going to ROH in Mass. I know what you look like. And since we aren't allowed to wish death on each other anymore, lemme just say that you better stay the fuck away from me. Fuck you Jay Doring. Fuck you. And fuck the rest of you while I'm at it. I'm out. I'm done. Fuck off and die.

Jesus Christ. I'm not hardcore? Bitch, you wouldn't know hardcore if it kicked you in the fucking nuts. You complain that you've got chronic back pain and shit. Fuck you. I broke my wrist and enjoyed the fucking pain. I'm not hardcore because I fucking break glass over my own skin? I'm not hardcore because I fucking take scissors to my own body? C'mon Jay, tell the people about that time I cut my own arm and head open after more fun with Katie, and you had to talk me out of dumping salt literally into that wound. You couldn't even take Ray Borque's kid, I would have killed that motherfucker. Bitch, you talk all this shit about your amateur background in wrestling, but what you forget is that you were only an above average wrestler at your own pansy-ass weight class. Against a larger opponent who is more interested in ripping your fucking throat out then grabbing you from behind, you wouldn't stand a fucking chance. And unlike every other challenge to fight on the internet, we know where each other live. I should go to ROH on 11/29, cause I know you'll be there, and we can settle this like me once and for all. Well, as much of a man that you can be. By the way, Zoe called. She said she left you because you were an even bigger bitch then her mom.

Weak Hey Sandman, "KA-TIE, KA-TIE, KA-TIE" Yet, I can count the number of dollars I spent on that bitch on one hand. Wanna tell me how much money you blew just begging for some chick to stick her hands down your pants? At least I've had women down there. I could offer the fucking hope diamond and I can't think of any chick who would go near your Crisco-covered fat ass. Ah, the fat jokes. I honestly expected better then that of you Jay. Well then, tool, let's talk about the time you got drunk and nailed that one sorority slut Jay. The one who gets passed around more then a collection plate on Sunday Jay. Remember all of the bitching you did about STD's and the bad HIV (not the good Hi-V) and how you were going to hell and all that shit? Cause I fucking do, bitch. So, I may not be fist-deep in some whore cooch, but at least I know I can piss without bleeding. Well the Jakey boy, *I* could talk about your livejournal, you know, the one that made absolutely everyone on campus hate you, the one that made all your friends from home disown you, the one that will keep you from ever touching anything remotely female for the rest of your college career, the one that made your own parents afraid of you. I'd post a link, but I'm waaay to nice a guy for that, and you should be on your knees thanking me for sparing you that humiliation. Yeah, you should be on your knees and thanking me, because if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't know who you were. If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't be a CZW fan. I came on here, got known as the main CZW fanboy, while you got lost in the ROH crowd. Now you review every goddamn thing in sight, trying to attempt establishing some credibility. Barber has more credibility than you, and it's fucking sad. If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't even be straight edge. You used to live for chronic and alcohol, and all of a sudden here I come and I throw up the goddamn X, and hot shit, if I'm liking something it's gotta be good. You start to throw up the X. I put an sXe banner in my sig, and low and behold, you do the same damn thing. It's like a mirror here Jay, just a smaller and more inferior one. Fuck bitch, you're avatar title there, 2 Hardcore 4 a gimmick, you ripped that shit off of me after I started using it as an away message. Jesus christ, you need to live off me that much? How about that good ol' livejournal, huh? Well, should I let it known that after I started one, you started one up too? Fuck Jay, I'm surprised you're not down here living off my shadow. It's rather sad that you copy off of everything that I do around here. By the way, go ahead and try to turn heel on us like you did on the IWS board. I saw your attempt, and even Mario would be embarassed at what you did. edit- forgot to even mention that I'm the one who pimped Messiah and Mondo, and before I know it you're all of their dicks. And it's gotta eat you alive that I can easily talk to Katie Cashman, the Katie YOU crushed on forever. Fuck, I mention something about Katie #1, and you're all paranoid that I'm doing something with Cashman Katie. You know, I outta walk upstairs and ask Cashman Katie what she's doing this weekend...

Weak Hey Sandman, "KA-TIE, KA-TIE, KA-TIE" Yet, I can count the number of dollars I spent on that bitch on one hand. Wanna tell me how much money you blew just begging for some chick to stick her hands down your pants? At least I've had women down there. I could offer the fucking hope diamond and I can't think of any chick who would go near your Crisco-covered fat ass. Ah, the fat jokes. I honestly expected better then that of you Jay. Well then, tool, let's talk about the time you got drunk and nailed that one sorority slut Jay. The one who gets passed around more then a collection plate on Sunday Jay. Remember all of the bitching you did about STD's and the bad HIV (not the good Hi-V) and how you were going to hell and all that shit? Cause I fucking do, bitch. So, I may not be fist-deep in some whore cooch, but at least I know I can piss without bleeding.

Weak Hey Sandman, "KA-TIE, KA-TIE, KA-TIE" Yet, I can count the number of dollars I spent on that bitch on one hand. Wanna tell me how much money you blew just begging for some chick to stick her hands down your pants?

Weak

Weak Just like your cologne. BA DUM BAH! Even weaker

Weak

It's "Incandenza Quote Night." Way to miss the memo.

I'm getting a kick out of you trying to take one of my hobbies and attempting to turn it into an insult. I'd be more impressed if you did a good job with it.

Meh. Decent insult, nothing really going for it. 4/10

Faggot Weak Like your beliefs. See, there you go. Almost hitting below the belt. Go watch some CZW you dumb fag. And back to the weakness. Such potential. ::Shakes head::