Art Sandusky

This dude is telling the other guy that drinking beer when you're sweating is a great idea. (slaps forehead) Flacco has an arm, but the Flash doesn't play for Baltimore.

God has a sense of humor. Give a team all that success and allow it to build itself to a near-invincible level, culminating in their first spectacular loss in the biggest game of the year. Oh, and their superduperstar quarterback is taken out for the year in the first quarter of the next season. They go 11-5 but miss the playoffs. It's all pretty damn funny.

GOOOOOO FINS Come on, you went to the playoffs because God hates the Patriots. Only that kind of divine intervention would make you division champs this year. EDIT: Miami might be able to take advantage of the Ravens D. They're looking all coked-up and overly aggressive out there.

THAT'S HOW WE ROLL WOOOOOOOOO IT BLOWED UP REAL GOOD I'm officially about to murder everyone associated with the Ram Challenge.

What happens in the playoffs doesn't reflect what goes on in the regular season, you should know that AoO, unless you're just being biased towards Peyton. Plus he's playing a defense that had a shitload of INT's. Well, I am biased, but even looking at it objectively, Pennington had less yards, TDs, completions, and first downs than Manning, a worse W-L record, and only .6% better completion percentage. Statistically, Manning had a better year, and the Colts would've been 1-15 without him. (One win over Detroit). Whatever. 5-11, 6-10. They would have been Green Bay, pretty much.

They're problay the same n00bs who wrote off last nights game for the Chargers. I'll make you a deal! If the Ravens blow a 20-3 (oddly enough the score in the game in 02) lead I'll quit TSM. Don't do it! It'll just doom Miami.

Agent remembers the epic Chicago/Arizona game from a couple of years ago. He knows shit can happen. Whoops. TD Baltimore. Hm. Miami absolutely positively has to score a touchdown on this possession.

I wanna see the 1-15 team win it all, dammit. Did the inspirational Disney Mighty Dolphins movie end with beating the big, evil New York City Jets for the division title?

I remember when the Ravens knocked the Dolphins out of the playoffs in Week 7. Ohshi...

Battlenuts was always one of my favorite names on here.

I'm not sure who I want to win this one. The Cardinals have always sucked, but Atlanta came back from the dead.

Well, she's kinda right.

Something I notice about Utah: Everyone knows where the ball is at all times. Sounds small, but it makes a huge difference.

He was all "fuck naw, we can't go down like this." DOIN IT FOR THA CONFERENCE

If Alabama was BCS good, they'd still better be able to whoop some bitch-ass upstart team like they're supposed to even on a bad day. Had Alabama beat Florida in the SEC Championship, Utah/Florida would have kinda ruled, but then we'd have a guaranteed Oklahoma national title.

Drunk fuck.

This Sugar Bowl is glorious. Utah has the biggest chip on their shoulder in recorded history. I contend that this speaks more to how Alabama was never very good to begin with. I said this since the opening blowout of Clemson. They blew the best of their efforts on the SEC Championship. Down year for the SEC, I gotta say. Florida's a very worthy title contender and probable champion, so there's that for the conference to hang its hat on this year. I hope it doesn't become the Southeast-10 with Florida wrecking everyone for a while. Is this what it felt like when USC started dominating, Pac-10ers?

Alabama's playing like a team that doesn't give a crap after being sixty minutes away from the title game a month ago. Utah's playing like a bunch of goddamn headhunters.

LSU + Georgia Dome bowl game = assrape.

Whoawhoawhoa. I never said that.

Aw, Dama! It all looked just splendid. Any drunk relative stories from the reception or anything?

I think stating a deadline would have been a comment that warranted a thread.

Congrats! :-D

So I hadn't been to TSM in a while and had some time to kill before I went out on Friday night. Naturally, the first place I go is No Holds Barred, the place for precision skewering of posters I'd never heard of by other people who had no lives. It's been a few days, something's gotta be cracking there, I thought. This would be good. So I click on it, seeing that there's a thread about Damaramu. It is that time of the year for him, so I guessed some 18 year old Hawaiian transplant with the apparent constitution of lint felt this annual force of nature for the first time. When a Big XII team and an SEC team love each other very much, Damaramu pops out, a 6'4" cornfed (how'd that happen?!) man-child. Nope, it wasn't that at all. Whew. No, this was far more troubling. My internetting smile turned to an expression of grave concern for this poor woman, barely able to feed herself and having to be restrained when she had an episode. "She should be in an institution, not on a marriage license!" I exclaimed.