Kinetic

For a small fee, Pacific Northwesterners can have their pictures taken with Kinetic on April 3-9. Supply the mullet and have your picture taken with Metal Ed. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity.

I'm intrigued by the Hall of Boredom and the Coast of Shattered Expectations. Any thoughts?

I don't know. I hear Cape Disappointment's not that great.

On April 3-9. Pacific Northwesterners, what should I see or do?

He sucks, but I don't like setting the precedent that it's okay to ban someone just for sucking. An awful lot of the posters here would be skating on thin ice if that were the case.

Agreed. Something clever like "Campaign 2008 Continues."

You're breaking my heart, Cheech.

Who will represent the Baltimore Ravens in the third round of our mock draft?

In fairness, the Stevie Wonder interpretation of "We Can Work It Out" that Archuleta was attempting to mimmick is actually pretty good. He just sucks when doing anything other than a big, gushy ballad. It was odd that "Yesterday" was referenced so many times, but then never performed. Would have seemed ideal for Archuleta. After the fact, I was thinking of how much better "Mother Nature's Son" would have been for Castro than whatever it was that he ended up doing. All in all, I think the only people that really benefited from having the best group of songs ever were Chikezie and...what's her name. The Irish girl. Kind of disappointing.

Yeah, her performance was like something from "Hee Haw." Archuleta fucking up three times on "We Can Work It Out" was amusing. I found a lot of their song choices really odd tonight. Too much pre-Rubber Soul stuff for my taste.

They've been dying to get the rights to do Beatles songs for years, so it's not surprising that they're rushing it out there as soon as possible. I predict Amanda doing "Helter Skelter" and Archuleta doing "Let It Be."

So they're doing Beatles songs tonight. This could get ugly.

I'm thinking the Louisiana Load might be better than Louisiana Fatass. I like Pillsberry Throwboy, though.

I always thought it was an homage to Bps. He would post with that structure hundreds upon hundreds of times each day.

I'm with Czech. Consolidate all of the wrestling folders into one folder with a series of subfolders. But to truly break free from this place's past wrestling ties, we'd need to change the name. I like the initials, so we could use those as a starting point. How about The Sam Malones: I'm not tethered to that, just brainstorming. The Sensible Masturbator would be another option.

He's not even gone and I already miss him. I'm now thinking an Obama video to the tune of "Black Diamond."

As predicted, the Bucs have signed Warrick Dunn. They've also signed Antonio Bryant. I like the Dunn move to a certain extent, but Bryant is a turd. I anticipate this working out about as well as Gruden's previous infatuation with David Boston.

I'd say no. I think either the Raiders or Jets will grab him, if the rumored Dallas/Miami trade doesn't end up happening.

Don't Open Until January 2009

We cannot and should not ban Marvin. He is part of the fabric of our community. Can you imagine TSM without him? I can't. I'm not even trying.

Per PFT (via SI.com) JaMarcus Russell is tipping the scales at about 300 pounds right now. We all know that Jared Lorenzon is referred to as The Hefty Lefty. I propose an effort to find Russell a nickname that will reflect his burgeoning waistline. How about The Louisiana Fatass?

The Lions signed Brian Kelly, who had been Tampa's best CB when healthy. But he's never healthy, so good luck with that.

Where have you guys been? It's been the talk of the board! Remember this juicy revelation:

Christ, I hate that Archuleta guy. He looks like he's about 12 and he's got this nauseating showbiz kid quality about him. I don't know that I'd swear the show off forever if he were to win, but I'd hate to see this thing turn into a long coronation for that gushy little douche.

This should not be allowed. People should have to live with the consequences of their actions. If they don't learn it here, where are they going to learn it? EDIT: That was in reference to the thread being deleted. Possibly applicable to that Michael Bolton picture, as well.