kkktookmybabyaway

I have on the 9-noon people on (the show with James Washington) because there's nothing else on in my market besides Beck, and I can't listen to him five days per week. I used to listen to JT all the time on Sports Fan Radio. I also tuned in at work to the Sports Pig on the weekends -- half of his callers were drunk. I was a regular caller of his during the 4-5 a.m. hour Sunday mornings after I got home from work. Since I lived at Sappy Valley he always assumed I wanted to talk PSU Football, so I just began saying I was listening via the Internet from Shittsburgh. And what ever happened to Sports Fan Radio -- did they go under or merge with some other company?

The last few posts just gave me an idea. I will be doing the two different contests -- a league pick 'em and a cumulative "league" (think of what Bravesfan used to do). There will be a pseudo-twist to the cumulative contest. The poster with the best score of that contest who doesn't have a team in the other league will get first dibs at any available franchise in Season V. The person with the second-best score will have second dibs, etc.

• I know talking about video games is pathetic, but I don’t care. Last night I was playing Game 5 of my NHL ’06 second-round playoff series against the Devils. I was already up 3-1 in the series, but the last two games had been extremely close, and Game 5 was no exception. The first two periods were scoreless with each team getting a number of chances to score. Then New Jersey opened up the final period with three goals within the first 10 minutes of simulated game time. (I play 5-minute periods; otherwise, these games would end up with several hundred shots and a few dozen goals per contest; at least this way the games are more realistic in terms of stats.) Suddenly, Martin Brodeur, who had been blocking every one-timer and deke I had been throwing at him all game, got lit up for three goals in the span of less than five minutes of game time. With 40 seconds remaining, I was able to score one more time and put in an empty-netter that sealed the deal with a 5-3 win. The first 40 minutes of this game had zero goals; the last 20 had eight. Now it’s onto Florida, where I have had trouble this season. • I heard on a local sports talk show this morning that the Pirates announced they are investing the $5+ million they saved thanks to dumping players this past trading deadline back into the team in terms of player development/scouting/etc. This raises the question of what has the Pirates front office been doing the previous dozen-plus years with the extra money it has collected from trading away players and their contracts. If $5 million got saved every year since 1993 thanks to getting rid of costly players in mid-season, you’re looking at $70 million in savings. With that kind of scratch they could sign A-Rod – for a week. • This humidity must be mellowing me out because yesterday I went to the grocery store and didn’t even bother to goof on this woman when she thought she could ring up her order on a personal shopping scanning station. I don’t know why I didn’t have the heart to tell her that she had to have been shopping with a personal scanner in order to check out at that register. I probably chose not to because I wanted her to finish checking out before realizing that all her rushed effort would be for naught. Besides, I know had I interfered with her attempt to quickly get out of the store it would not have ended good. Here is how I’m guessing the conversation would have gone: “Excuse me, but you need to have a personal shopper scanner in order to ring up your groceries at this registers.” “Huh?” “*I go on the explain for 5 minutes or so what a personal shopper scanner is.*” “Well they should post a sign saying this registers is for personal shoppers only.” “Uh, they do. *Points to big-ass sign this lady passed right up before scanning items.*” I’m not sure what will happen after this, but I’m sure this woman would bitch some more, and I would have had to put her in her place because I have no tolerance for people that do something dumb and want to place the blame on someone else. I think another reason I bit my tongue in this case was because I bought these kick-ass ice cream sandwiches called “skinny cows” for half-price and didn’t want them to melt during this encounter. The reason I am talking about grocery shopping is that I’ve noticed a lot of products are being discontinued, particularly these Emeril sauces that are way overpriced. I wonder if the other grocery products around the discontinued items make fun of them when nobody’s watching because the manufacturer is basically saying that nobody wants to buy this crap and it’s no longer being produced. Most of the time I have nothing to do with these discontinued items, except for these Shrimp Teriyaki Bowls that were hella good. Of course those disgusting Garlic Shrimp Scampi Bowls are still kicking; God knows why.

They're socialists, so I give them a pass when it comes to self-sufficiency; hell, about half of the people in our country are just as bad.

More information about what this scaner thing is has been provided via the link I posted in the entry. It's great.

Ever jerk off while sniffing your dad's panties?

N*gga plz. I heard that term back when I was a shorty rocking Hugo Boss. N*gga = offering sensitivity to other cultures. plz = showing that I am down with contemporary urban linguistics. Or is the term now known as "plizzle"?

That's for the 20th Anniversary Edition.

What thread is the Ear/Rant tiff taking place? What's your opinion on the newer Dawn of the Dead?

I'll be part of your support group. It's rare that you actually get co-workers you get along with and end up with lasting friendships, which is a shame because plenty of workplace troubles are so petty and stupid. If I actually had to work next to the assholes who are called my co-workers instead of being on a different floor, I probably would be in jail by now. I got burned once from some "complaint" letters by someone who was a bigger violation of company policy than me. I just bit my lip, stay in my office and document everything I do and everything other people don't do. I don't plan on doing anything with this documentation, but if I'm ever put in this situation again, I will come out with both guns blazing.

KKK’s Top 103 Posters Number 67: Slapnuts OK, let’s get this out of the way. There. Now I don't have to repeat these infamous words again for the rest of this entry. In Slappy's defense, I think he took the ribbings he received for his "freezing" remarks in good stride, or as good as one can get after something like this. Aside from the above-mentioned quote, Slapnuts has been known for other things, such as defending Israel from the mainstreamliberalpress and TSM Jew-bashers (boy that sounds odd coming from me) with those long-ass "Myth" posts that I never took the time to read due to all the words those things contained. He was also a member of the Conservative Brigade, and according to our last AIM conversation he is/was studying to become a lawyer, which is funny considering he said he didn’t care much for the people in this particular line of work. All in all, the Baltimore Orioles-loving Slapnuts isn’t too bad a guy, even though he will forever be remembered for a certain 77 words. And now a word or four from the expert panel I have put together to comment on the people I’ve listed. From the Real World’s Champion: From EricMM: From Cancer Marney: From Bob Barron: • Upon reading Black Lushus’ comment in yesterday’s entry, I got the thinking about Mel’s recent “Jew” remarks. I don’t have any of his Mad Max movies etched in my memory bank, but I wonder if there were any Jewish characters in those films? If there weren’t, then perhaps a post-apoplectic world won’t be such a bad place after all. Then again, black people will still be around, so a futuristic wasteland filled with devastation and nomadic tribes on wheels won’t be a complete return to Eden. Baby steps, though, baby steps. • Just die already you piece of shit and get your one-way ticket to hell punched. I had to laugh when I learned that Fidel's younger brother, who is now in charge (for the moment) of that commie island by Florida, is the vibrant age of 75. And people goofed on the Catholic Church for appointing a guy not much younger than Pope John Paul II to be the next Pontiff? Oh, and I heard on the radio from a White House spokesperson that if Fidel should kick the bucket, the United States is ready to show the fine commies and wanna-be exiles of Cuba a better way to govern themselves via the democratic system. Really? When will they start showing us this system? OMG SELECTED NOT ELECTED LOL2000! Sorry for that, but sometimes you just got to let one of them out every now and then. And for the record I'm talking about "OMG..." lines, not Jews in concentration camps. If lovecraft doesn't deem that to be offensive, then I don't know what else to do.

How much did your trampoline cost?

He owns Rantsylvania now?

I must be losing my touch. Either that or you're building up a resistance.

Assuming Carlos=Banky:

• I talked yesterday about one thing that I didn’t care for regarding professional football, and today it is Major League Baseball’s turn. The trading deadline expired a little while ago, and this is the time of year when contending teams try to find that one extra pitcher or slugger to put them over the top. On the flip side of this coin are losing teams looking to unload soon-to-be free agents they can’t afford to retain in hopes of getting some worthwhile prospects. I get how this game is played. If you’re the Yankees, you don’t want to give up whatever good young players your minor league system still has. If you’re the Phillies, you want to ship off someone you won’t be able to re-sign in the off-season and get the best deal possible in return. Trying to get something for nothing is the American way. However, can we please lay off the theatrics of teams absolutely refusing to hand away a particular prospect? For weeks I’ve heard the Yankees say proclaim they will ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY REFUSE to give up some can’t-miss minor-leaguer they have in their system. I don’t know who this guy is, nor do I care. All I know is that the guy’s a pitcher and the Yankees won’t part with him no matter what the circumstances. Well, it looks like they got Bobby Abreu in return for some minor-leaguers that were not on their “untouchable” list. I’m sure Al Keiper or Bored knows who these people are and can give you some win-share figures of each player’s time in A, AA and AAA ball. Quit the public theatrics and get the deal done in private. • Speaking of trades, I heard this morning that the Pirates have shipped off Sean Casey to the Tigers earlier today. What’s hilarious about this is that when Casey, a hometown boy, signed with the Pirates this past off-season, it was being billed as a sign of things to come with this losing franchise. Oh it was a sign all right. A sign that the tradition of finishing in last place is still going strong. God I love this team. On the bright side, Casey is now going to a former Shittsburgh manager that was at least able to get his team into the postseason. Oh, and speaking of the Tigers, I had been expecting them to fold sometime this season, but after their recent performances against White Sox and Twins I now think they’re a legit playoff team. Of course, having said this I’m sure they will proceed to lose their next 20 games. The local media has reported over the past few days that the Pirates were going to make some trades. They weren’t kidding. As I was watching ESPN this afternoon I was reading the bottom-screen headlines and it seemed Shittsburgh deserved its own little section. First I saw they traded Oliver Perez and Roberto Hernandez to the Mets. Then they traded infielder/outfielder Craig Wilson to the Yankees. Then they traded pitcher Kip Wells to the Rangers (yeah, that'll improve the Texas rotation). Now my question is if these teams are all in the postseason chase, then why in the hell do they want players from this franchise? It’s not like a team gets to be 40-66 overnight. It takes persistence and effort, baby. • So Mel Gibson has "allegedly" shown (or should I say bellowed?) his true colors as being an anti-Semite. Now I like this guy even more. With the media criticism of his “Passion of the Christ,” how can you not blame Gibson for thinking there’s a Jew conspiracy out to get him? I bet his bartender’s name ended in “-stein” and phoned his buddy (collect of course) at the Los Angeles Times once he saw Mel’s state of intoxication after last call was announced. OK, now this made me laugh.

Good luck.

I thought we had rules at this here place regarding NSFW pictures, but whatever. At least I got to make my post early and get the hell out of this thread before the shit hits the fan.

He had a psycho person come up to him at the Tonight Show.

The Pirates can finish in last place with a cheaper payroll; quit hating on Shittsburgh (that's my job). Can't wait to hear all the bitching from the few fans remaining regarding these trades. But hey, at least they have a nice stadium.

That's what I'm here for. I really don't care if I'm in this or not considering I think NCAA Division I-A Football is a joke. I told Bored if he needed an extra body to even out the numbers to his league then I would happily oblige. In the meantime, I'm just engaging in some playful banter.

• Well now the media can settle down with their “OMG REGGIE BUSH MAY SIT OUT THE ENTIRE YEAR” hysteria. The guy signed on the dotted line with the New Orleans Saints and is supposed to report to training camp today. I can’t stand the “Will this rookie holdout sit the entire season?” stories that usually spring up about this time every year. What made this season's batch especially annoying was that Bush is supposed to put the city of New Orleans on his back and bring this place back to prominence, or at least back to having college white girls take their shirts off in exchange for some beads. What really pissed me off was the notion that Bush “promised” to sign a contract early and then didn’t. For a football player, who may be one play away from a career-ending injury, I don’t blame these people one bit for trying to get as much money as they can. The only thing I disagreed with Bush on in this situation was the “I should be paid like I was the overall top pick” talk. You weren’t drafted first – get over it. Otherwise, I say get your money now, put your financial house in order, and then concentrate on your craft. • I was watching the Sports Reporters this morning and Mitch Album talked about this judge who ruled pat-downs at football games unconstitutional. He was right. Holy shit is this Gordon Johnston a fucking douche, and what a shock, the Atheists and Criminals/Communists Love Us organization helped him in this lawsuit:. Hey bitch boy, you’re not getting stripped searched. You’re not having your anus probed in search of weapons of mass destruction. You’re getting a pat-down before entering a stadium filled with more than 50,000 other football fans. Get over it you bitch-ass faggot. I loved his last line about in the “absence of a specific threat or suspicion of those being searched universal pat-downs are too broad a response." So you want only to pat-down people who look suspicious -- well who are you going to deem worth of such suspicion? I bet the instant anyone gets a “suspected” pat-down you’ll come down from your ivory tower, U.S. Constitution in hand, and then get the ACLU to sue on behalf of Adbul because his pat-down was RACIST. And of course should a hidden bomb explode at a Bucs home game, Johnston will probably be one of the first armchair quarterbacks bitching about how stadium security didn’t do everything they could to prevent the blast from happening. I have to wonder if the government school Gordon teaches at has any metal detectors/search procedures. Hopefully this school does, and another commie judge rules these search methods unconstitutional, only then to have a student put a few bullets into Johnston’s skull, further turning his brain into mush.

Nah, the Vols just don't seem the same ever since he changed the uniforms from orange to pink.

I've now added another list in my first post with names of people that don't have a team but expressed interest in just picking games. If you'd be interested in this and do not have a team give a shout-out in this thread. Please note I would be using point spreads for the overall pick 'em contest, too.

So I gather you didn't need the services of my BYU franchise? You Mormon-ist.