kkktookmybabyaway

Maybe he hates that jingling noise loose change makes in your pocket. I use my cards for small purchases, but I don't think I've ever went under $1. Even I have my standards. Then again the joke may be on him if his bank charges a fee for debit use (some places do).

• So a day or so ago I was chatting with one of my AIM peeps, and he mentioned that IWC writer Rick Scaia (is he still around?) has his own Wikipedia entry. For reasons unbeknownst to me I decided to head over and check this out for myself. I wonder who wrote this entry? Curious to see if any other Internet Wrestling Reporters have their own little slice of Wikipedia, I decided to see who hit the big-time. Dave Scheer. Nothing. Bob Ryder. Nothing. (That "Ryder Report" ain't what you think.) Scott Keith. Something. Wade Keller. Something. Dave Meltzer. Something. Wrestlecrap. Something. The Shooters. Nothing. That’s about all I remember from my rasslin’ days. Oh, there was also Mark Madden. He had his own entry, too, but I was more interested in other parts of his Wikipedia references. Hmm, I detect a pattern. Actually, I cut out the rest of the WTAE part of this entry, which went on to say he is a guest on "Action Sports Sunday" on WTAE-TV, a half-hour sports discussion show. What I really found funny was that the Shittsburgh City Paper dropped him for "questionable taste," considering this publication is one of those urban papers that you have give away for free. And what does being an Internet Wrestling Celebrity and having your own Wikipedia entry mean? I have no clue. • Sure animal-rights people will bitch about a pig having to die just so some psycho can hold and cut it up all in the name of “art” instead of putting the carcass to good use – like say, making some hickory-smoked bacon out of it. However, what’s even more appalling to me is that this exhibit was taxpayer funded. Oh well, at least it’s the Brits getting screwed over this time and not Americans. And at least the “artist” will be showing her tits. That's got to count for something, right? • My new hero. Remember, this guy is a so-called CIVIL RIGHTS leader: Now lets see if Mr. Young gets made fun of by some comedians posing as Bo-Sox radio announcers.

"My vibrating features have been disabled." Cute ad, although was the thin chick supposed to be good looking?

I was waiting for the throw down. It's a shame it took someone three days to do so. Then again it took me a week to respond to it.

You probably do more at your job than I do at mine.

OK. Carlito Brigante, how much harm can one poster do?

Fuck that. If fluffy can also drive a SUV, I'll adopt him. NoCal, a fountain is better for them than just putting down a bowl of water, although changing the filter every now and then is a pain. Add some ice cubes and they'll have a ball. JJ was afraid of the thing for about a week, but got used to it when the other water supplies in the house (the toilets) were cut off from him.

Jesus. I'm getting sore just thinking about a 5-minute spooge fest.

I could have sworn I read a thread like this before here. Anyway, just fart and burp a lot. That'll even the score.

Yep. You get the discount for the year and then it increases. However, I'd still be saving money after the increase so it's all good. When the sales guy was pimping this discounted rate I just looked at him and asked, "So how much is this going to be after the promotion?" I think he was happy because he didn't have to continue his prepared speech about how great Comcast was.

Oh let him back in. What harm can one poster do?

No, Mrs. kkk finds other ways to go through our money.

Like I have enough friends to spend 5 (let alone 5,000) minutes per month talking on the phone with.

I stand corrected. And yes, it is sad what we remember over the years. I remember that wrestler who worked at Radio Shack that would write about his matches. Those were some good stories.

What's the average salary for these players?

• So one of the big stories coming out the first Monday Night Football game of this NFL preseason was the performance of the new announcing team, particularly that of Tony Kornheiser. Well some in the media were less than complimentary toward Tony’s performance, and I heard earlier this week about Kornheiser ripping into fellow ESPN talking head Mike Golic. I didn’t hear first-hand what Golic said about Tony’s performance, or Kornheiser’s reaction to Golic’s comments on Dan Patrick’s radio show. However, I heard both comments on Golic’s morning radio show the other day. If what Golic said about Kornheiser was indeed “offensive” to him, then Tony needs to grow some thicker skin, and this is not meant to be some sort of cancer joke. Goddamn, what Golic said was nothing – all he really said was that Tony’s performance wasn’t earth shattering. And for someone who makes a living commenting on other people through “Pardon the Interruption,” it is downright laughable for Tony to be whining about the negative criticism about his Monday Night Football performance. I watched part of the game in question, and yeah the announcing team sounded a bit off. However, this is the first time the three of them have worked together, so naturally there will be a couple of rough edges. Being one of the few people out there who actually liked ESPN’s Sunday Night Football trio of Mike Patrick, Joe Theismann and Paul McGuire, I don’t blame Theismann for not being totally in sync with his new colleagues Mike Tirico and Kornheiser. However, the announcing wasn’t godawful or anything; it was just announcing. I remember the Dennis Miller experiment at ABC a few years ago, and I commented back then about how much I hated listening to him. Looking back, I felt that I overreacted a bit, so I’m not going to be one of those folks who want to tar-and-feather Kornheiser over not being the next Howard Cosell after just one exhibition game. (I will give Miller points for saying after he was released that he held no ill-will toward ABC and thanked them for giving him the job of his dreams for a few years; other people would have complained to any news camera within 50 feet of their shadow.) Besides, even if this trio flops, it’s not like these Monday Night games are on network television. Pro football may be a ratings beast for cable television, but it pales in comparison to network figures, even if the network ratings are on the decline. • So there’s some guy who’s said he was present when JonBenet Ramsey died. Oh goodie. I haven’t been paying attention to this story, but I’ve heard that his ex-wife or someone says he wasn’t at the Ramseys during the night JonBenet died. Whatever. I’ll wait until some DNA tests are completed before caring about this story. Too bad this guy wasn’t a Catholic priest; JonBenet would still be alive today. Also, thinking back to one of my favorite South Park episodes (the one that focused solely on Butters), I can’t help but wonder if the third public figure in the You’re-A-Liar Club really didn’t kill his ex-wife. First Gary Condit has been cleared of killing his intern he boinked on the side (not to mention on her back and probably while she was on all fours), now it looks like the Ramseys might be cleared of killing their kid once and for all. Could it only be a matter of time before O.J. finds the real killers?

Actually, I've been meaning to ask Comcast a question regarding this subject -- is it really all calls (local and long distance) for one flat rate, or is there some bullshit "local long distance" catch that once fucked me over with Ameritech?

Only the best for my little angels.

And just how do female canies poop -- through their ears? I liked you lesser when you were taking your vacation from the ever-so-intense Internet, bitch.

Good thing my three aren't smart enough to figure that one out. Actually, we keep the lids closed or else Max will drink out of there and not out of their water fountain.

Oh, there's something better: answering the phone when the customer in question calls to complain about you and they don't realize that they have called your store instead of the National Hotline.

Well there's taxes, franchise fees, etc, that jack the $99 bill up a bit, but I'm still saving money and I get all three services on one bill, which is nice.

Of course not. I must admit, however, to rather enjoying enforcing those "unbreakable" rules. One example of a "bendable" rule was the one not allowing us to accept $50 or $100 bills. We weren't supposed to, but whenever our managers received these bills they accepted them. I, on the other hand, didn't.

A few days ago I was talking about Lottery People and how they are different from you and me. To recap, there are two basic types of Lottery People: Those that play games like Powerball and those that go the scratch-off-and-win route. In my recent entry I talked about the “numbers” addicts, and said that for as pathetic as these people are the scratch-off zombies are worse. Now trying to determine which faction of Lottery People are worse is like trying to decide if you would rather encounter a bunch of black people or Mexicans in a dark alley with $100 in your hand; it usually comes down to one’s personal experiences. While the “Powerball” Lottery People have annoyed me more often during my time working at the Quickie Mart, the “Instant Win” Lottery People have produced more memorable encounters. There’s one that tops them all, however, and it’s a wonder I didn’t get fired from this one. It started off innocently enough. This middle-aged chick came in and bought a bunch of $2 instant-win tickets. She seemed harmless. Not only did she come at a time when the store wasn’t busy, but also she went to a corner of the store to do her scratching. Many times Instant Win Lottery People just stay at the register and muck up the counter with that scratch-off residue. However, about 10 minutes later she came up to me and said that the one lottery ticket was “defective” and wanted a new one. Whenever a cashier receives a winning instant lottery ticket he or she has to first scan the ticket in the lottery machine. The machine will then ask for a three-digit code that is found on the instant-win ticket. It is only then when a payout is issued. If the three numbers aren’t punched in, there’s no cash payout. (This was back 10 years ago, so I’m not sure if the same process has to be performed.) The issue this woman had was that when she scratched the shit out of her cards she was erasing this three-digit code, too, making her tickets void. There was a problem with this woman’s request. One of the first things I was taught at the Quickie Mart was NEVER to exchange a used lottery ticket. Now when you’re at a dead-end job you have “rules” that are commonly broken in the name of shutting up whining customers or something of that ilk. Then there are those rules that you are not allowed to bend under any circumstances. Anything dealing with the Pennsylvania lottery fell under the latter. I told this woman that I couldn’t take her “defective” ticket and give her a new one. She started getting pissy with me and whipped out the old, “Well the other guy who works here gave me new tickets,” to which I replied, “I’m not that other guy. And the other guy wasn’t supposed to do that.” This bitch then took out a pen from her purse and demanded to know what my name is, even though my nametag was right in front of her face. I responded by grabbing a writing utensil of my own and asking for her name and phone number. When she asked why I said, “So when you tell your lies to my manager about me I can call you on your line of bullshit.” I never got a number. And she did end up calling my manager. It turns out the “other guy” she had referred to was the boss’s husband. While I’m talking about Instant Win Lottery People, here is my second most memorable moment. It was Christmas Day 1996 and our lottery machine was down. Now once again one of our “never break under any circumstances” rules was that when the lottery machine goes down you don’t pay out any tickets or sell any non-scratch tickets. Well of course because there are plenty of lazy people out there who give out lottery tickets as presents, I turned away quite a few customers with winning scratch-off tickets. This one guy threw a fucking fit over not being able to get his $1 prize. I told him that the computer system is down and there is nothing I can do. He then whipped out the old, “What’s the big deal? It’s only a $1 ticket,” to which I replied, “Well if it’s only a $1 payout, then what’s the big deal of waiting for when I am permitted to accept the ticket?” He then started to storm out and said those famous words every cashier has heard a million times: “I’m never coming back here again.” This prompted my co-worker at the other register to mutter out “oooooo.” The customer was half-way out the door, stopped, turned back around and yelled, “OK, who said 'OOOOOO'?” My co-worker put his head down and the idiot customer walked up to him and said, “What’s your name?” and looked at his nametag. “Derrick. I’ll remember that name, Derrick.” By this time I was biting down on my tongue so hard that if I had put any more pressure on it I would have tasted blood. I looked at Derrick and replied, “Good job. Now I’m going to have to laugh out loud at this guy while he’s still here,” and began to do just that. This sparked a chain reaction with the other customers in the store. When it was all said and done about a dozen people in the store laughed this guy right out of the place. I don’t know if he ever called to complain about Derrick.

Maybe the bitch was asking for it.