BUTT

Whaddayamean? The sports games were GREAT! It wouldn't be part of the game's name if it wasn't true!

Don't tell me you couldn't figure out that the whole site is a joke.

Basically for being too honest and not telling them what they wanted to hear,

Recently, I've been playing a lot of SMS games. It's very interesting to see Sega's initial entry into the home console market (well, except in Japan) during a time when they really seemed to not quite know what they were doing. (To be fair, they never really seemed to know what they were doing except when Tom Kalinske was in charge, but looking back at this time it seems more like naivete due to inexperience than the total cluelessness which they would become known for during the Saturn era.) The lack of experience really shows itself in the software, which by and large was simply not that good. One of the main problems is that Sega's main strength at the time was its arcade software, much of which was popular due to its tremendous 16-bit graphics. On an 8-bit system, the scaled-down versions of games like Hang-On and Space Harrier weren't very impressive. Almost all of the Master System games had a very "rushed" feel to them, with almost none of them showing the kind of care that Nintendo's first-party releases were exhibiting. The system's sound chip is worth mentioning too - I can't describe it, but there is something strange about the sound of all the system's games. They all sound very similar, although that may be due to the fact that most of the system's games were created by Sega, unlike with the NES where a lot of game companies (Konami, Capcom, and Rare to name a few) all had a very distinctive sound where you could tell that the music was created by a certain company just by listening to it. I had never played much of Alex Kidd in Miracle World before, but after playing through it recently I've found that it was a pretty good game. If I had been running Sega at the time I would have put it in as the pack-in (which it eventually would be - more on that later) but those in charge at the time obviously felt otherwise. Tom Kalinske, when he was put in charge in '91, understood that to compete with Nintendo and Super Mario World, Sega would need their own mascot-based game packed in, which is why Sonic was put in the box with Genesis. But those in charge of such decisions at Sega in '86 thought that Hang-On would be a better choice for a pack-in. I understand their rationale - after all, it was a popular game in arcades - but the home version captured very little of why people like the arcade version, which was largely popular because of its sit-down motorcycle-shaped cabinet, and that couldn't be accurately replicated on the SMS. I'm sure the card slot on the system was born out of good intentions, but since only a handful of games used it I'm sure the Sega people eventually wished they had left it out. (And eventually they did leave it out, in the system's 1990 rerelease). The card slot was used for the Master System's 3D glasses, which I'm sure were cool, but didn't exactly make any difference in sales). The physical design of the system really left something to be desired. Compared to the NES it just looks tremendously cheesy. And what's with that diagram on the right side? Ugh. The controllers weren't that great either. You'll notice two things looking at this: 1) The D-pad is circular-shaped which I've always hated in game controllers, and 2) Button "1" doubles as "start". The pause button is on the console itself. That's convenient. I've already discussed the choice of Hang-On as a pack-in, and why it didn't quite work. The other pack-in, Safari Hunt, wasn't a great game but they obviously felt they needed a showcase for their Zapper ripoff, the "Light Phaser", and this game served that purpose well enough. I will admit that in playing the system for the first time (when I was 9, and I honestly had no idea at the time that Sega had released a system before the Genesis), the fact that those two games were built in was pretty cool from a novelty standpoint. Later they would release a totally ugly second version of the system with Alex Kidd built in, but by this time it was too late. Obviously Sega's largely sub-par software and Nintendo's lock on third parties were the main reason for the failure of the SMS, but the horrible packaging and marketing of the games didn't help at all. Take a look at some of this box art: and these ads: Not exactly something to set the world on fire. Hey look, I commented on that last ad! I like how they advertise "The incredible Phantasy Star" and then don't tell you anything about it or even show any game footage. But Thunder Blade, man, that's a system seller. Of course, the SMS wasn't unsuccessful everywhere. It caught on pretty big in Europe. I have no idea why, and Europeans would be better served to explain this than me, so I will leave it alone. Overall, the Master System wasn't a bad system, but I can certainly see why it was unable to compete with Nintendo in America and Japan. Luckily for Sega, they would learn from their mistakes and succeed with their next system (and then promptly forget what they learned and fail with all subsequent systems). I'm sure many of you who are more well-versed in the Master System can expand on this. At the very least, I better see AndrewTS in here. Come on now!

I just don't get it. A lowercase "i" looks like an upside-down exclamation point. This is not exclusive to Nintendo's new machine.

Wii Wii Just testing. Now that's reassuring.

If Marv himself had written that sentence, it would be written "Marv!n !s really just fantast!cally pathet!c."

That kind of word-filter circumventing doesn't fly 'round here, Marv.

You could have posted this in the other Fall Out Boy thread, SIR.

I'm sure it was. I believe that's why they pre-taped the Sabu/Sandman match - so they would have something to show while they repaired the ring.

ECW wasn't on WWF's payroll back then. And Doink was in WWF through the end of '95.

If I am not wrong, I could have sworn this was hosted by Joey Lawrence and Candace Cameron. AMIRITE?? EDIT: Yes, IAMRITE!

Shame you can't say the same thing about PPV buys, which is where the money is made. If they are not watching the t.v. shows, then how are they going to be tempted to purchase The PPV's? With the exception of WrestleMania and possibly The Royal Rumble, few purchase PPV's based on name value alone anymore. It's not like HTQ is arguing that Russo should be aiming for BAD ratings. It's just that ratings are not everything, which is something that Russo has never quite grasped.

YES

It's funny Matt would say that, because Inc doesn't really do anything in the Music folder except talk about bands he likes. Meanwhile, I remember once Inc was making fun of Matt's old girlfriend and Matt got all upset and then Inc flamed him and Matt was like "I'M GONNA HACK YOUR MYSPACE". I'd figure that would be more of a factor in Matt's opinion of Inc.

Not really. Wario Land 2 DX was a Japanese launch title and came out in the U.S. in February of '99. Zelda came out in December '98 in both countries. SMB DX came out in May '99 in the U.S. but in Japan was only available through some sort of wacky downloading service and sold around 150,000 copies when it would have sold millions if released on a regular cartridge.

Deuce and Domino have been scheduled to be brought to the main roster for a year now. Seriously, I remember Meltzer on the LAW right after the Royal Rumble last year talking about how they would be debuting soon.

Sting offered to do the job for Abyss after they told him that he was losing the title. TNA insisted that the match end by DQ.

Credit: wrestlingobserver.com

So, apparently WWE 24/7 starts on Cablevision this week. I've heard nothing about this before now but dudes on the Death Valley Driver board are saying that it's happening.

I thought I remembered, and I could be wrong, that they immediately released Clark but asked Adams to go to OVW because he was a friend of the Undertaker.

I suspect that Christian has hired Scott Steiner. I don't know why, I just have a feeling.

That remix is poorly edited. The transition from "riff and loop" at the beginning to full band is messed up, as is the transition from the second verse to Jay-Z rapping. But I guess that gritty, unpolished sound is to be expected from a collaboration between such hip-hop giants. Streets is craving more Deon remixes.

Banders and subliminal_animal were one and the same.