Swift Terror

In the mid 1980s, Porsche introduced a supercar known as the 959. At the time, it was the most amazing automobile on the planet. Costing around $300,000, it featured technological wizardry that is still admirable in 2006. It has now been sent to the woodshed by the new Bugatti Veyron. The quad-turbo 16 cylinder Veyron is the most powerful production street car ever made (1000 bhp), the quickest ever, and the fastest ever. Only a select few will ever drive one, fewer still will own one, considering you will have to lay down over 1 million dollars to have one in your driveway. How amazing is this street car? Consider this: Fitted with the proper tires, it would easily win any Nascar race as its top speed is 252 mph. That top speed is in Indy car territory. The British automobile show "Top Gear" recently featured the Veyron. The show's host, Jeremy Clarkson, drove the car across France on his way to London. He was racing his two co-hosts, who were flying a Cessna in an attempt to beat him to London. They lost. Top Gear is the best show about cars I've ever seen. It was briefly seen in America on the Discovery Channel, only to be yanked off (rumor is that Discovery is trying to produce an American version). It was a thoroughly British show, some of the cars were Europe-only models, they were right-hand drive, etc. Most of their pop-culture references were incomprehensible to an American viewer. But despite all that it is very entertaining and interesting. The host of Top Gear is a tall, ungainly yob who frequently utters anti-American sentiments, as do the other hosts. It seems anti-Americanism is deeply embedded in their Id or Superego or whatever the hell the appropriate sub-conscious is for this example. They always trash American cars, but it doesn't stop there. Yet I still find episodes to watch from the internet--the show is too good to stop watching simply because of their bias.

I think Alec Baldwin and Sharon Stone would make a great pair. They're both single aint they? Well, not like that matters in Hollywood.

One of Europe's most legendary and respected metal bands, Gamma Ray, has tour dates this spring and summer in the United States. When heavy metal got wiped out by the grunge wave of the 90s, Europe was the only place to find metal. And wow, was it ever metal. It could be argued that much of it was better than what we had here in the U.S. One of the best was Gamma Ray, a German band renowned for the technical precision of their music. Fast, furious, and exquisite. Whaddaya expect, they're German aren't they? They are going to be in Massachussetts, New York, Virginia, and Los Angeles this year. The only bad thing is that their latest release, "Majestic", contains some strong anti-American lyrics. One of the songs alludes to the War on Terror and how we (Bush) has unleashed his evil on the world, etc. So I won't be making the trip and spending money on their concerts. Yes, I already bought the CD. Now I wish I had downloaded it for free. Here are the lyrics: Oppression deadly reign Madmen gone insane They hate and bring us pain Bloodlust in their eyes Getting high on torture cries They hate and terrorize They sacrifice They try to break my will They claim the right to kill My world is standing still I`m lost in hell They try to make me right A prisioner no reason why All I try is to survive The world`s demise Chained in darkness - Screaming for the light! Killing pain to save my life [Chorus] Condemned to hell - I`m facing the end of my days Condemned to hell - Their torches are burning Condemned to hell - My freedom will burn at the stake Condemned to hell - The dark age returning They don`t care, they close their eyes Kick away our human rights A world dehumanized Now tell me... how many gave their lives? How many have to die? Killed by official lies With stars and stripes Pain and anger - Killing all the light! Darkness comes... eternal night [Chorus] Condemned to hell - I`m facing the end of my days Condemned to hell - Their torches are burning Condemned to hell - My freedom will burn at the stake Condemned to hell - The dark age returning Chained in darkness - Screaming for the light! Killing pain to save my life [Chorus] Condemned to hell - I`m facing the end of my days Condemned to hell - Their torches are burning Condemned to hell - My freedom will burn at the stake Condemned to hell - The dark age returning Condemned to hell Condemned [Repeat 3 times] Hell! Hell!

The only good thing is, nobody knows who Gamma Ray and nobody cares. So when they rant on stage against George W. Hitler, it won't get covered or mentioned by anybody in the press.

Thomas Jefferson said coffee "is the favorite drink of the civilized world." Of course that was a slap in the face to England, a bunch of nancy-boy tea drinkers that we wished to distance ourselves from in any way possible. Those cats back in the early days of the country were crazy-mad coffee drinkers. Fast forward some 200 years and here I am in a typical office environment trying to get a decent cup of coffee. There are four avenues available to me. 1. Take part in the office coffee club. $5 per month or 25 cents per cup. No way, I have no control over who makes the pot, it could turn out watered down. 2. Bring in my own small coffee maker. Eh, too much trouble, I'd have to decide whether to bring the coffee I have at home to the office during the week and take it back for the weekend, or buy an extra can just for work....bah, the hell with it. 3. Stop at a coffee shop every morning. Haha, way too expensive. Plus, what if want a cup after I've been at work a couple hours. 4. Instant coffee. Yep, 4 gets it. Now, which brand to buy. I've had Folgers and did not like it. I had Maxwell House and liked it. Then I bought a second batch and found it tasted different and thought they had changed the formula. They had not, but I'll get to that in a second. So thinking that Maxwell House had changed their coffee, I decided to try Nescafe Tasters Choice. Never had it, it's been around a long time, a name brand, I figured I couldn't go wrong. Plus they had those hip, cool commercials in the 90s that were like mini soap operas. Well, I opened it up for the first time and the odor was something on the order of dog shit. If you think I am exaggerating, I assure you I am not. So I went back and browsed the coffee aisle, and realized that Maxwell House has two different coffees on the market. I had bought the new one, called "Rich". It sucks. The old classic was still there and is better. Now what to do about the 10 o'clock snack...

That's one of my downfalls--I can't enjoy coffee unless it is filled with large amounts of cream and sugar. I wish I could simply take it black. Which reminds of a great line from the movie "Airplane!". A young boy is sitting next to a young girl on the doomed plane. He says "I like my coffee black, just like my women".

GM and Ford's recent fiscal year has been horrible. GM alone LOST something like 4 billion dollars. Yet I'm happy because they are building powerful muscle cars that harken back to the high-horsepower heydey of the 1960s and early 1970s. Rear wheel drive cars with torquey V8s and prominent badging. A car guy's dream. Now, it's true we have had 2 American cars that have been holding the fort for a while, but they were the only two. Of course I'm talking about the Corvette and the Viper. But those 2 were for the upscale set. A true muscle car should be available to the masses, a real blue-collar type. Recently things have picked up, starting with the retro stylings of the Mustang, and continuing with three new cars. Dodge Charger. Well, they screwed this up, it could be argued, by giving the car four doors. To be a proper muscle car, it should have 2 doors, but I wouldn't mind owning one. The R/T had a Hemi and something on the order of 325 bhp. Now they have the Charger SRT8, 6.1 Hemi with 425 bhp and Ram Air hood. Kick ass. Dodge Challenger. One of the great monikers from the muscle car era. A late comer, but very popular. A properly restored 1970 Hemi R/T Challenger will go for around 1 million dollars at auction. (A Hemi 'Cuda convertible sold for 2 million dollars a few months ago). This car is going to be simply awesome. It will have a Hemi of course, retro styling, and some nifty gadgetry like on-board telemetry. Chevrolet Camaro. The Camaro is coming back after being killed off by GM in 2002. News of its demise was greatly exaggerated. Also sporting the retro styling craze, the design channels the famous 1969 Camaro, one of the most popular Camaros ever. With the comeback of the Camaro, we'll see if mullets and hair bands are far behind. While the gasoline is coursing through my veins, I'll talk about the incredible Bugatti Veyron in my next post.

I prefer Judas Priest "Love Bites" but I'm old school Metal. Man, that chick is probably one of those women that complains about men, yet the blame is with her for constantly picking scumbags and losers for boyfriends.

I can't get into the modern sports console games. I'll admit it, part of reason is, I am far from an expert on offensive and defensive schemes, I get overwhelmed by the options on something like Madden. I should probably try the baseball. I grew up on the simple games of the late 70s early 80s. You know, the hand held football game was a series of blips and you just moved your blip around the other blips. Ah, it was a simpler time. I had the "Head-to-Head" football, which meant there were 2 controls on opposite sides of the screen. You and your friend were literally playing against each other, each controlling your own blip.

Well, now you're messin' around with a Cincinnati tradition. "Sports or Consequences" is a beloved segment on the Gary Burbank show. That chant is as well-known as Skyline chili or Montgomery Inn ribs. Mike isn't part of Burbank's show. His sidekick is a lame-ass called "Duke Sinatra". You talk about bad, that guy is the poster-boy for lousy radio.

Radios are allowed, but Beck's been replaced on WKRC in favor of Tony Snow. There are some web sites that the "workplace filter" will not permit you to access, but some slip through the filter. It's nonsensical, you're allowed a radio but a web site that streams radio is not allowed because it's classified as "entertainment". But like I said, I can get Beck later in the day on a site that somehow gets through the filter. Mike does both local and national stories.

Glad to hear you like Mike McConnell. I listen to him 9-12, because my workplace banned the web site where I used to get the Glenn Beck feed. Mike is great, christ he's been on since about 1987. He's had offers to move to LA and have a national show, but prefers the idyllic life in Cincinnati. There are a cast of kooky frequent callers to his M-F show that are hilarious. They always get a first class beat down from Mike.

Anyone see that video where the cat falls from a very high tree, hits a branch, slams to the ground (not on its feet) and darts off? Hey, Intensifier, nice to see a military guy here. I was in the Army. Fort Bragg, 18th Airborne Corps. My father was a Marine in the 1950s.

I layed around Saturday as well, but not because I'm sick. My damn car wouldn't start. And my second car is sitting at the dealer getting the brakes fixed. All the necessary starting devices are working (battery, starter, alternator) but the engine won't fire. Great, now I have to tow it Monday and search for a way to get to work. And get repair bills for 2 cars. I didn't watch movies as a result of being house stuck. I watched a cool show on Blackbeard, from the National Geographic channel and various car shows from Speed Channel. Oh yeah, and watched my wife's beloved Indiana Hoosiers get beat by Gonzaga, with their 70s porn star Morrison (who didn't even have a good game). I'm thinking about watching Transporter 2 today, the first was great.

Ah yes, Biggs makes it into my grocery store rotation every now and then. I like to mix it up and go to Krogers, Meijers and Biggs. The whole conveyor belt Divider thing is one those wonderful cosmic conundrums that will forever have Americans at each other's throats. I use it, but sometimes I don't, like what you described when there's nothing left on the belt from the person in front of you. BUT, what about that person who might come up behind you? There you are, with your stuff on the belt, then someone comes up and starts putting their stuff down before yours gets picked up by the cashier. And you haven't put a Divider down BEHIND your stuff. I've done this before and sometimes the person will look disgustingly at you and your items, waiting for you to use the Divider. So who's responsibility is it? These people then grab the Divider themselves and slam it down, no doubt thinking "I can't believe YOU didn't use the Divider". I guess the solution is to always use the divider, both in front of and behind, your items. This is another reason why I like the self-checkout lanes.

We have a similar thing here. Krogers has the "Plus Card" and you can get 10 cents off gasoline for every $100 per month. I wish they'd do the personal shopper thing, that sounds cool. But for now, I dig the self checkout lanes. Any time I can avoid a cashier I'm doin it. A huge Wal Mart is moving in almost right next to a Krogers near us. But I see no problem for Kroger--their groceries are far better and more diverse than Wal Mart. Plus there are a gazillion Krogers around, they aint goin nowhere anytime soon. There are literally 5 Krogers within 5 miles of our house. We had a grocery chain around Cincy called "Thriftway". Wow, did they suck. Absolutely garbage. And they remained that way for a long time. Then they made a last minute attempt to improve, but it was too late. I'm pretty sure they are all gone, there may be 1 or 2 left but they aint long for this world.

Hildago was pretty lame, all in all. I have the sinking feeling that Indiana Jones 4 (yes, all the principles are committed to making it) is going to be on the same level. The movie just had a made-for-TV feel to it. And it definately was full of Arab stereotypes--CAIR must not have been paying attention to its measly box office.

All I know is that during the early and mid 90s, GG Liddy was great. I always listened to him over Rush because he was much better equipped to debate angry Lefist callers than Rush. With his educational background, life experiences, and high IQ, he blew away Rush when it came to meeting the callers mano a mano. Recently he has fallen off a cliff and reads a lot, but he never used to do that in his hey dey. His show was dynamic and engaging and caused a lot of buzz. I remember one of my professors at UC mentioning him in class, completely gratuitiously, upset at something Liddy said that had made headlines. Of course I knew he had never listened to the show because he got what Liddy said completely wrong.

I thought I remember hearing commercials on that station with Boortz, but I'll have to listen more closely today. I usually just tune the breaks out. But the thing is, other radio stations I listen to do play the commercials. Dennis Prager out of Los Angeles--I hear every local LA radio commercial. 550 and 700 here in Cincinnati also play the commercials over the internet. The whole thing's messed up. Some play commercials, some don't.

Mike Gallagher spent a good deal of his youth near Cincinnati, in Hamilton, Ohio. His father ran a Cassano's Pizza restaurant. Or was it Little Caesar's, I can't remember. He goofed up bigtime a few weeks ago on the air. Someone sent him an email telling him that a liberal talk show host had insulted his wife on the air. Mike spent an hour ragging on this guy. It turned out to be a lie by the emailer. Whoops. Verify, verify, verify. Beck must have fallen off, I thought he'd be in the top 5. I'm too lazy to look up where he ended up. I can hear Boortz over the internet, but the station that I get the feed from is very aggravating. They play annoying promos of their local morning show. I mean, they play 3 or 4 of these 20-30 sec promos... in a row! One after the other. I gotta find another station for him...

Well, this morning offered 3 more annoyances dealing with cars on the road. First, there is this lady in a Camry that has the same schedule I do. I sometimes end up behind her getting onto I71 north on my way to work around 7am. She has a bumper sticker that says "I don't eat anything with a face". Well, bitch, it looks like you're better than those of us who do. Seriously, why put that on your car for others to see? So she can announce that she is morally superior to the other drivers around her. I don't care about people who are vegetarians for health reason, that doesn't bother me. But types like this whore really set me off. God, I need that gun on my dash. Second, the off-ramp where I exit the highway has 2 lanes. Of course, these continue onto the actual street as the same 2 lanes. A Semi truck in the right lane, directly in front of me, just took it upon himself to turn into the left lane as he turned onto the street, causing the car in that lane to have to take measures that I'm sure they didn't feel like doing at 7:20am, such as having to swerve nearly into oncoming traffic to avoid the fool. Third, I get into my parking lot, get out of my car and walk towards the building. A lane is between the lot and the sidewalk to the building. I approach this lane and see a car coming, having just turned into the lot from the street. I stop waiting for the person to drive on. They stop, but I am stopped waiting for them to drive on. I don't like to walk in front of cars, I mean maybe their foot slips, maybe there is car behind them that doesn't know why they're stopped and wants to come speeding around them, whatever I just want these people to continue on, don't wait for me, I can wait for 2 seconds while you pass. I know she was trying to be nice, but jesus, if a pedestrian is clearly waiting for you, go the fuck ahead and drive.

Since gasoline prices have risen over $2 and the fact that I have to buy the 93 premium gas for my car, I have taken to setting the cruise control to about 60 on the highway (makes a huge difference in gas mileage). I stay in the far right lane like I'm supposed to. Yet people still tailgate, etc. and seem to be on the verge of killing someone because I'm not doing 75, even though there are 3 additional lanes to the left that they are free to use. Sometimes I'll come upon a driver who's going even slower than I am. This means I'll have to venture into the next lane to the left to get around them. I do this and get back to the right as quickly as I can. I do not, however, slam the accelerator just to please the people in that lane. Well, you'd think I just shot my friend hunting the way they act. And I love the people that get impatient while going on an on-ramp to the highway. I simply drive up to speed, put my turn signal on, and merge into the lane according to the lines. Many people don't see it that way; they wish to swerve over into highway lanes well before your actual lane begins, and if you aren't doing the same, you are some kind of creep holding them up. Oh, if I were allowed to keep a firearm on my dashborad, many would die by my hands.

That's good--he is for entertainment purposes only. The station he was on--1160am--has completely changed format and now plays music, oldies I think.

I don't get the Jim Cramer love. On the occasions that I heard him on the radio (6-7pm [he's now gone]) I wanted to punch him. Some guy picking stocks for you, telling you what to buy with your hard-earned money, based on speculation? F that. Yes, I know, he comes across as a funny, quirky fun-loving guy who wants to help you. Great. Cramer was a "piker" back in the 90s tech craze. He would hype stocks on CNBC, just like other pikers, causing their value to rise artificially. The hype was based on NOTHING. It was a circle that benefitted the big boys and some regular folks who sold quickly. The "daytrader" craze types. Now it's all gone and how many people got screwed over?--thousands. He will end up at a reserved dinner table in Hell, Pit No. 5, extra hot.

Ha, I learned HTML as part of my technical writing program. Not that I could design a web page from scratch right now mind you--that was 6 years ago and I've not had to use it since then. And I don't have the desire to practice web page creation in my spare time in the basement, like some techie geek. You're lucky regarding being happy with the phone help. Nice, helpful people on the phone are a rare thing indeed.