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Gary Floyd

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  1. Gary Floyd

    The Rover

    By Gary Floyd,

    -In case you didn't read this thread, I was coming home from class today, when these three guys offered me free bread and cream corn. I don't like cream corn, but I like bread, so I said why not. Well, it turns out that it was free if you visited Tom Green's website, so I didn't get a thing, except cream corn on my hand. So in other words, fuck Tom Green.
     
    -CronoT 2.0 (Inuyasha) was banned, and I say good riddence. He'll be back, but for now, thank God he's gone.
     
    -Congrats to alfdog and Agent of Oblivion for their new moderator gig. Maybe EHME and WP will be banned soon. Until then, let's keep our fingers crossed.
     
    -I saw Katie Couric's CBS evening news debut. It was pretty lackluster, but Morgan Spurlock's appearence was great.
     
     
  2. Gary Floyd

    Psychic Warfare

    By Gary Floyd,

    I have no idea why this entry is called "psychic warfare" either folks.
     
    -Well, it's back to the old grind for me tomorrow, because that's when classes start. I'm ready though, though I'll most likely be pretty busy. Also, I have roomate named Cameron, who's a pretty nice guy, which is good, since I was worried I'd get a complete asshole as a roomate.
     
    -Happy Arbour day.
     
    -Steve Irwin died. You know, I always thought that he'd die in a non-animal related accident, though the fact that he was killed by an animal doesn't suprise me in the least. The guy was an idiot, but he was a lovable one, and I always strangely admired how he straddled the line between bravery and stupidity with his antics. So RIP Steve.
     
     
  3. Gary Floyd
    Sick. Perverted. Pornographic. Politically Incorrect. Darkly Comic. Scatalogical. Tasteless. Blasphemous. Disgusting. Evil. These are just some of the words that could describe Edward Lee's book "The Bighead"
     
    First, a little background info on the man himself. Ed Lee is one of the most hardcore horror authors out there. Sure, he has written mainstram fare, a childrens book, and is a hell of a pulp horror writer (see "Creekers" and "Coven" for examples). However, it's works like "Goon", "The Pig", Ever Nat", and other small publisher books that have gained him notority. It's easy to see why, also. The are violent, repugnant, pornographic, and warped tales of grotesque erotic horror, laced in pitch black horror. Out of all his works though, his most well known is "The Bighead"
     
    The Bighead tells the tale of Luntville, and two city girls: Charity and Jerrica, visiting Charity's aunt. While Charity is having problems finding the right man, Jerrica is a sex addict, who has taken a liking to a foul mouthed priest in Father Thomas, who is being haunted in his dreams by two nuns from hell, who have some stomach churning fetishes. Oh, and there are two sick rednecks, Travis and Dicky, who will rape and kill anyone in their path. Let's just say that these guys and the nuns give the book "American Psycho" a run for it's money in the torture and rape department.
     
    Oh, and there is the legend of The Bighead. Who is the Bighead? Why, he's a seven foot something inches tall homocidal pervert with a hydrophalic (giant head filled with water) and a fourteen inch long cock, who loves rape, murder, and brain eating. And it seems Charity's Aunt Annie knows a bit too much about him...
     
    Before you think of reading this, I might want to warn you: this book is sick. There's rape, murder, cannibalism, loads of sex, scatology, watersports, urinary catherization, sacriligious behaviour, abortion, babies having their heads smashed in, and more. This stuff makes "Jackass" look like the Teletubbies. If you think nothing can gross you out, then this will prove you wrong.
     
    But is it a good?
     
    Well yes, it is. For all the disgusting moments and general sickness on display, this book works. This is mainly due to it's warped sense of humor. One way to look at it is a horror answer to "The Aristocrats", in the fact that it constantly one ups itself with sick moments.
     
    Also, the characters are interesting. The reader goes on to feel bad for Father Thomas, who only wants to do the right thing, as well as Jerrica. The other great thing is the redneck stereotypes, ranging from Travis (who outdoes the sickos from "Deliverence"), Dicky, and even handyman Goop Gooder. Over the top redneck dialogue, booger pickeng, and a general lack of "edu-ma-cation" makes for a good laugh.
     
    There are a few problems. In particular, how have Dicky and Travis been able to get away with their rape and murder spree for so long? Oh, and the ending, when you find out Bighead's origins, will either disappoint you, or you will have no problem with it.
     
    In the end, "Bighead" is a sick, demented ride of pornographic, scatalogical, and sadistic horrors that will either have you disgusted, or laughing your ass off. I ended up doing both.
     
    8.5/10
     
    You can get it here.
  4. Gary Floyd
    -It seems like a woman was fired from her job as a sunday school teacher in New York because she's a woman. Read the story here. And people wonder why I became a deist.
     
    -I just saw Dante Tomaselli's new movie "Satan's Playground". Avoid it. I wrote a review for it on the Internet Movie Database, and it should be up soon.
     
    -Salon is retarded. According to them, "24" needs to stop. Well gee, I'm sorry that it didn't have enough about why Bush is a horrible president, you stupid fucks. Read it here. At least they ripped on Nancy Grace.
     
    -Geraldo has a problem with Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. Seriously, has anybody ever taken Geraldo fucking seriously. The guy is a gigantic dick, and is only good for the unintentional humor he provides.
     
    -I went to the mall again last Thursday. Why? Because I needed some new t-shirts. I didn't find any that were good unfortunately, though Spencers at least plays better music than Hot Topic. I do find it amusing, that so many kids sepend so much money on anti-Bush t-shirts, when they have no idea they are falling into the hands of the same corperations they so lovingly rail against.
     
    That's all for now. Next time: A review of Edward Lee's book "The Bighead"
  5. Gary Floyd
    If you ask me, "The Venture Brothers" is the best thing on Adult Swim right now. Here is why:
     
    -It's from two guys who worked on The Tick. Remeber that awesome cartoon?
     
    -JG "Foetus" Thirwell does the shows music. And he does a hell of a job.
     
    -The best characterization and continuity on a comedy show since "Arrested Developement"
     
    -Brock Sampson is the biggest badass in cartoon history
     
    -Dr. Venture is such an asshole (he even used an orphans heart to operate a machine), and you can't hate him. In fact, you can't hate any of the characters
     
    -Hank's obsession with Batman
     
    -Dean's schoolboy crush on Trianna. You just have to like Dean. Plus, I think she's starting to like him back
     
    -Dr. Orpheus. Everything he says is hilarious. Plus, he's a wonderful parody of Vincent Price
     
    -The constant Pop Culture references, ie William Burroghs, Hunter S. Thompson, Star Wars, and even H.P. Lovecraft get nods
     
    -The Monarch
     
    -The Monarch's henchmen
     
    -Girl Hitler
     
    -The fact that most of the villans have grudges against Dr. Venture because he is such a prick
     
    -The most quotable thing on TV right now. Plus, the quotes and one liners never get old
     
    -The fact that Brock, Dr Girlfriend, and Phantom Limb are the smartest people on the show
     
    -Dr Girlfriend's voice, and the fact that she's able to put up with complete losers. I'm suprised she actually has had sex with Monarch
     
    -Brock thinking Dr Girlfriend was once a man. I've thought the same thing
     
    -Brock's sadomasochistic relationship with Moltov Cocktease
     
    -Hank's creepy crush on Moltov Cocktease
     
    -Monarch's henchmen singing "Mars, Bringer of War"
     
    -Brock, naked and covered in Blood, singing Technotronic as a man's last request
     
    -Dean's testicle problems. The poor kid gets the most abuse, and it's hilarious
     
    -The villains various origins.
     
    -Stephen Colbert has been on the show
     
    -"IGNORE ME!"
     
    -Brock telling Hank it's like he channels dead people
     
    -The best realization that laughing at fucked up people and their problems is great since "Arrested Developement"
  6. Gary Floyd
    -I was going to do a look at the movies of Dario Argento, but since nobody here unfortunately knows who that is, I decided not to. I will do a review of the book "The Bighead" next week.
     
    -I will be seeing "Snakes on a Plane" tonight. Hopefully, I'll stop hearing about it soon, as it's not funny anymore.
     
    -NHB needs fixed. Ban EHME, WP, and Cronoyasha for starts. Oh, and quit posting racist gag pictures already. Not even a highschool kid would find it funny. In other words: It's not funny, it's not offensive, it's just lame.
     
    -The Venture Brothers is the best show on Adult Swim right now. I'll do a "reasons the Venture Brothers kicks ass" entry soon.
     
    -Also, starting in September, I'll be doing a list of the manliest movies ever made. Unfortunately, only two Arnold movies will be on it.
     
    -This is stupid folks, as well as overused.
     
    -Book recommendation: The Conqueror Worms by Brian Keane. Great post apocalyptic sci-fi horror.
     
    That's all for now. Next time: Why the Venture Brothers rules.
  7. Gary Floyd
    -In case you've been living under a rock for the past week and a half, Joe "I look just like Max Wright from Alf" Lieberman got his ass handed to him by Lamont. While some in the media talked about his pro-war stance, let's not forget that
     
    -He loves censorship. Really, he's one of the reasons we have ratings on video games now.
    -He's not a big fan of Clinton
    -He looks like Droopy Dog
     
    While I have no sympathy for the guy, I find it funny that it seems like the only position the Democrats can seem to agree on any more is Anti-War. We have yet to see most of them make a stand or stance on just about anything at this point.
     
    Also, Ted Kennedy recently attacked Cheney for his comments on Lamont. While I'm all for ripping on Gargoyle, I don't think that Kennedy is the best choice to criticize.
     
    -No, I'm not going to remind folks to see "The Descent", because I'm sure that some of you folks have already seen it. For those who did: I told you that it's great.
     
    -It seems like there is an upcoming settlement between Isreal and Hezbollah. Well folks, it isn't going to last long. Hezbollah will just attack again in the future, and the U.N. and the governments of the world will continue to wonder why there is so much conflict. Maybe it's just me, or maybe it's just common sense, but there has always been conflict in the Middle East, and there will always be. Me, I have no idea how to fix things. Hell, I don't think things ever will be fixed. Some might call that negative thinking, I call it the truth.
     
    That's all for now. Next time: A look at the movies of Dario Argento.
  8. Gary Floyd
    After countless web searching, I have found a picture of Stephanie McMahon's new baby. Here's the picture, in all it's glory:

     
    now, onto other things
     
    -Slant has to be one of the most retarded webzines online. If it wasn't for their undying love of Dario Argento Movies, I'd write them off completly.
     
    -That Yates chick was found not guilty by insanity. My response: bullshit. It was five children, her own children might I add- that she killed. I don't care how crazy she is, that should count as guilty.
     
    -Ever heard of David Icke? He's an anti-semetic nutcase who believes in a reptlilian alien illuminati that has taken over the government. Oh, and he thinks he's the son of God. And that he can communicate with the spirit world. His message board is full of wackos. Also, he thinks that somehow, the matrix is real, and he's had several books published.
     
    -Lance Bass is gay. As I said in the music board, I thought he was "Bi, Bi, Bi". Christ, that joke sucked.
     
    -Finally, Leena's avatar pictures are awesome as of late. Keep 'em coming Leeners.
  9. Gary Floyd
    Earlier, I promised that yuou would see my list of what I think are the most overrated Horror Movies ever. Well, here's my list.
     
    -Friday the 13th Part 4-I never got the love for this one. Sure, it's got some nice kills, but it's also not the best of the series (I think that would have to be Part 2). Plus, Jason is killed by Cory Feldman. Seriously, of all the people, why him?
     
    -The Lost Boys-Everyone seems to love this one but me. Sure, it has it's moments, but compared to "From Dusk Till Dawn" or "Near Dark" (which came out that year), it's inferior. Check out "Near Dark" instead, which is considered a horror classic for good reasons.
     
    -Cannibal Holocaust-Whether or not it inspired Blair Witch is beyond the point: this one is not as good as it's reputation says it is. Sure, the score is nice, and it is disturbing at times, but for the most part it fails due to some weak gore and the fact that it tries so hard to shock you, that you just grow bored. Then there's the whole "I wonder who the real savages are" ending which is forced and contrived. Seriously, this movie condemning sensationalism while wallowing in rape, tortue, and animal mutilation is pretty hypocritical.
     
    -Zombi 2-Lucio Fulci's gorefest is actually kind of a bore. While the good parts work, the movie is mostly really talky and boring. To those who say it's better than Romero's zombie movies: Romero's Zombie movies have interesting characters you sympathize for, have much better acting, are more professional, have a plot you can follow, and are better than this movie could ever be. Oh, and there's the fact that some talk about the film pulling off social commentary. To those who think that: Fulci always thought that such things didn't belong in his movies/
     
    -April Fools Day-It's ironic that so many horror fans hate "Scream" but love this movie, which is more self aware, and thinks that it's smarter than it's audience. I will agree that the sequals to Scream (and the many knock offs) do fall for that trap.
     
    -NOES 3-I have to admit, I only liked the first NOES movies. I personally think that once Freddy started saying one liners and such, the series began to suck. To this day, the popularity of this movie alludes me.
     
     
     
  10. Gary Floyd
    -Well, things are alright in my world. I'm thinking of finally breaking down and buying an iPod or MP3 player of some sorts, because I'm tired of buying CR-R's
     
    -My brother called me a conservative today because I don't see the draft coming back in the future. Oh, and Newt Gingrich, who as you remember, tried to get Clinton out of office for adultry when he himself was having an affair, says that World War III is inevetible.
     
    -Also, I fucking pisses me off that Bush will veto a bill that allows stem cell research, because of his fucking convictions. Dude, you are the president: forget your religious convictions for a second and just let the bill pass.
     
    -I'm still reading "The Bighead", and it is still sick. So far, there's been more cannibalism, more rape, vomit consumption, necrophillia, breast amputation, a piss enema, a doulbe urinary catherization, a baby having it's brains sucked out, and more. Also, I must have a stomach of cast Iron, because I haven't puked yet.
     
    -I know it's against the law amongst hipsters, but the new Killers single is really catchy.
     
    Well, that's all for now. Next time: a list of overrated horror movies
  11. Gary Floyd
    Here's some opinions some will agree with, and some won't. Remember, these are only opinions.
     
    -I hate it when I hear white guys talk about how hard they have it, and how they think black people are holding them down. To those guys: you will never know what real oppression is.
     
    -Also, to those who complain about black people not getting over the racism of the past and the present: 400 years is a long time.
     
    -Everyone on Late night TV is watchable except for Leno. What does everybody see in this guy?
     
    -When I saw the previews for the moivie "Little Man", I thought "Wow, Hollywood really doesn't know anything about Black People"
     
    -I feel bad for Jon Stewart, because most of his audience is now made up of Che Guvera t-shirt wearing, college fucks who don't know anything about the real world except for whatever bullshit Michael Moore has to say. Oh, and Nader fanboys.
     
    -I'm sick of hearing "Conservative Media" and "Liberal Media". The media is the media. Enough of your persecution complex.
     
    -Kathie Griffin may be one of the most annoying women on Earth.
     
    -Most athiest on the internet are idiots. I'm talking about some of the ones you find on Fark, who seem to think that because they are an athiest, that it gives them the right to be an asshole, and the whole Pastafarian thing. You know what: I don't give a flying fuck that you don't believe in God, ok? Just because you don't doesn't mean that you need to be a jackass to anyone who isn't. Then again, most of the athiests on the internet are high school NOFX fans who are mad that their parents made them go to church. What I'm trying to say is that I feel the same way about athiests that I do about most Christians: If you realize that what you do (or don't) believe does not mean you have to be an asshole, then you on my cool book. ell, I'm friends with several athiests, and they all kick ass.
     
    Oh, and yes, I think that the whole Patafarian thing is stupid. Again it's my opinion. I mean really, it's just a lamer version of the Church of Sub-Genius.
  12. Gary Floyd
    Music
     
    We got new albums from: Ghostface Killah (best album of the year so far), Revolting Cocks (a dissapointment), Ministry (also a disappointment) The Sounds (a guilty pleasure to be sure), Current 93 (great album) Pet Shop Boys (good album), Mono, J. Dilla, and others who escape my mind right now.
     
    Songs I don't want to hear anymore: "Ridin' Dirty" by Chamillionaire, "Move Along" by All American Rejects, anything from Hawthourne Heights, "Snap Your Fingers" bu Lil' Jon and the Eastside Boys
     
    Guilty Pleasures-anything from Rhianna, "Ain't No Other Man" by Christina Agulaira.
     
    Movies
     
    The WWE released "See No Evil", which I didn't see, and I'm glad I didn't
     
    "X-Men 3" came out. I eventually saw it (I know, after I said I wouldn't) with an open mind, and was still disappointed.
     
    "Superman Returns" came out today and I'll see it on Friday.
     
    "Hostel" disturbed the audience I saw it with, while "Slither" did bad boxoffice sadly, and I still haven't seen "Hard Candy" yet.
     
    Al Gore's documentary about global warming came out to tell us how WE DIDN'T LISTEN!
     
    A remake of "The Omen" came out, and sucked
     
    The internet became even more obsessed with "Snakes on a Plane", and the joke just isn't funny anymore.
     
    TV
     
    "The Shield" kicked all of our asses with how awesome it is.
     
    "South Park" was a mixed bag, with great episodes (Return of Chef, Cartoon Wars, TSST!) and some bad ones (ManBearPig, Smug Alert, A Million Little Fibers).
     
    Adult Swim gave us new episodes of "The Venture Brothers" and "Tom Goes To The Mayor" and the pilot for "Korgoth of Barbaria", which made me happy. They also gave us "Moral Orel" (which tries way too hard) and "Minoriteam"(why?), which didn't make me happy.
     
    Family Guy continued to be a shell of what was once a great show.
     
    Bill O' Reilly became even more obnoxious.
     
    Glenn Beck came in and annoyed me, while Olbermann is becoming too smug, and starting to become a little less amusing.
     
    Henry Rollins got a new show, and it bores me.
     
    The Internet
     
    I gave you folks my blog, and you've been suffering because of it ever since.
     
    Fark just doesn't amuse me anymore. Sure, some of the photoshop contests are cool, but some of the people who post there are total retards.
     
    ytmnd declared war on Scientology.
     
    I got in my first internet argument in my long time on the net with one Red Hot Thumbtack in the eye over the fact that I don't like the band Burzum.
  13. Gary Floyd
    Here's a list of horror movies that I think aren't really good, but I love them anyway. Basically, if you like your horror movies corny, then I recommend these.
     
    Ghosts of Mars-John Carpenter basically combines two of his movies ("The Fog" and "Assault on Precinct 13") and comes up with this sucker. It's not great by any means, but it has it's charms, such as Ice Cube, Natasha Henstridge (remember her?), Pam Grier, and a villain named "Big Daddy Mars" who looks like a goth rock star.
     
    Lifeforce-Tobe Hooper's biggest budgeted movie still entertains me, in spite of the fact that it's goofy as hell. Basically, it has Space vampires (including a girl who is naked throughout the whole movie) who suck out people's souls, the population of London turning into zombie vampire things, London being destroyed, overacting, and Patrick Stewarts first on screen kiss-which is with Steve Railsback. Also, the first of two Tobe Hopper movies on the list.
     
    Burial Ground-Italian zombie trash is ludicrous fun, with zombies that for some unexplained reason can use weapons, plenty of tits and ass, a creepy midget playing a creepy kid who has a creepy crush on his mother, gore galore, a scientist saying to a zombie "No, I'm your friend!"
     
    Zombie Creeping Flesh (aka "Virus" and "Hell of the Living Dead)-If Ed Wood directed an Italian zombie gore flick, it would be like this. Contains pointless nudity, bad dialogue(ex. "What's eating you?"), tons of jungle stock footage, some decent gore, and a scene with a man in a tutu that's suppossed to be serious.
     
    Mortuary-I reviewed this a while back, but after seeing it a second time, I've grown to sort of like it. In this one, a family of three takes residence in a morgue at Arkham, Mass (if you know of the works of H.P. Lovecraft, you know this is a bad thing), and run into some problems-including a guy called Bobby Fowler, more H.P. Lovecraft references then you can shake a stick at, and a fungus that turns people into zombies.
     
    Zombi 3-Lucio Fulci's sequal to "Zombi 2" is largely hated, but so corny, it's hard for me to hate. This movie deals with a toxin that turns people into zombies, but that's just the beginning. Here, you get zombie birds, slow zombies, fast zombies, a Stevie Wonder gone Ratafarian radio DJ, gore, and best of all-a severed zombie head in a fridge that inexplicably flies out and attacks a guy.
     
    That's all for now. Here's some of what you might find in this blog this summer:
     
    -A look at the year so far
    -Two book reviews-One of Edward Lee's "The Bighead", and one of Joe Lansdale's "Dead in the West"
    -The worst Wrestling feuds of all time
    -overrated horror movies
     
     
  14. Gary Floyd
    The politics of ooo feeling good!
     
    -Raw was a real mixed bag last night. Why are we all the sudden getting this uneeded supply of man ass all the sudden? Oh, that's right: DX is back, only now they're really boring. Also, Randy Orton getting cheered was really weird. Micky James is awesome again, now that Beth is momentarily gone. Eugene has gotten more annoying than usual, and is actually makng me look forward to the imminent destruction Umaga will give him. This amazes me, as I can't stand Umaga.
     
    -About the sand in Kotz's vagina: Kotz is one of my favorite posters here.
     
    -Here's another weird message board I found thanks to Something Awful's Weekend Web: Rob's Fantasy. Here, all your necrophillia dreams can be discussed. All the more proof that abortion isn't as bad as some make it out to be.
     
    -Leena's posting more, which is alright I guess. I wonder why Matt Young isn't posting as much, as he's much more tolerable than wildpegasus.
     
    -I don't know why, but I've been listening to a lot of synth pop lately, and not just Depeche Mode. I also mean Camouflage, Cause & Effect, and all the other one's not many people talk about.
     
    That's all for now. Next time: Shitty Horror Movies that I love
  15. Gary Floyd
    You know, I've seen a lot of Horror movies in my lifetime. Hell, probably more than I can remember. Anyways, I've seen some good ones, some great ones, some ok ones, some guilty pleasures, and some really horrible ones. Here's a list of some of the really horrible ones.
     
    Strangeland-Dee Snider (Yes, of Twisted Sister fame) produced, wrote, and stars in this shitty S&M and internet themed horror film as Captain Howdy (yes, from "The Exorcist"), a guy who likes to lure teenage girls via chatrooms into his lair, so that he can torture and mutilater them, and who says really pathetic pseudo-intellectual bullshit. Also stars Robert Englund (who you end up seeing spread eagle in his tightie whities), Kevin Gage, and Linda Cardellini as one of Howdy's victims. Yes, you see poor Linda Cardellini tortured and mutilated.
     
    Dario Argento's The Phantom of the Opera-How could Dario Argento fuck this one up? The first in the man's unfortunate decline, this one stars Julian Sands as a disfigured killer raised by rats, who falls for Asia Argento, and kills anynody who harms his rats. In spite of some decent kills, this is a disaster. See Argento's "Opera" instead of this one. Still, it's at least better than the 2004 "Phantom of the Opera"
     
    Manhattan Baby-Some people will tell you that Lucio Fulci is one of the greatest horror director's that ever lived. If you ask me, he's just a guy who got lucky a few times, and directed a whole lot of shitty movies. This one is probably his worst. Basically, archaelogists unleash an evil Egyptian spirit, which possesses the daughter of one of the professors, and murders ensue. A real bore, without any interesting kills, atmosphere, or anything else.
     
    Faust: Love For the Damned-Brian Yuzna has really gone under a decline. This poorly done adaptation of the XXX comic (so, why bother doing it as an R-rated movie?) is horribly acted, corny, and while it has it's moments, is a bore. It also really wastes the talents of Jeffrey Combs and Andrew ("Wishmaster") Divoff. See "Return of the Living Dead 3" instead of this.
     
    Meat Market-I'll never understand the appeal of these dreadful shot on camcorder zombie movies. This movie has lesbian vampires, a luchador, and decent gore effects, yet blows it all on piss poor acting (it's obvious no one in it has had any acting lessons), poor attempts to mimick much better zombie movies, and dreadful attempts at comedy.
     
    From Dusk Till Dawn II: Texas Blood Money-Directed by "Evil Dead" producer Scott Spiegel, this shitfest, in spite of appearences from Bruce Campbell and Danny Trejo, actually manages to be worse than your average Direct-To-Video sequal thanks to bland as hell characters, a disappointing finale, and a waste of talent.
  16. Gary Floyd
    -I didn't watch Raw last night (I watched the director's cut of "The Wild Bunch" instead), though from what I've read about it, it's most likely a good thing I missed it.
     
    Also, Edge is the best heel in the WWE right now, bar none. The guy can work up a crowd like nobody else's buisiness, and gets more heel heat than anybody else in the company.
     
    -What happened to Leena? Just a question, but really, what happened to her? Also, Ortonsault will probably hate me, because I don't like Randy Orton.
     
    -I'll say this about Ann Coulter: Fuck her. Fuck that fucking bitch.
     
    -In my last entry, I mentioned my love for the fighting game "Primal Rage", so now, let me mention two I always hated: Beast Wrestle and Rise of the Robots. BW was ridiculously retarded, and was boring to boot. I would talk more about ROTR, but all my complaints about that game have already been said by everyone else.
     
    Well, that's all for now. Next time: Why "The Henry Rollins Show" sucks, and whatever happened to Carnival?
  17. Gary Floyd
    Before I start my thoughts on Depeche Mode Albums, I'd just like to say R.I.P. to John Tenta.
     
    Now, on to the reviews. Here they are, reviewed in order of release
     
    -Speak and Spell-Lightweight stuff, and the only album produced by Vince Clark. There's some good tracks ("Photographic" and "Tora! Tora! Tora!" in particular), but for the most part, it's too lightweight.
     
    -A Broken Frame-Underappreciated, though I'm always a sucker for transitional albums. Some tracks are too lightweight ("Meaning of Love" and "See You") but this album is more focused and better sounding, and shows hints of what they would become with "Leave in Silence" and Monumet". Also has experiments with dub reggae that are hit and miss, and "Nothing to Fear" is one of their best instrumentals.
     
    -Constructuon Time Again-A bit of an industrial influence comes in with steel percusion samples and such on tracks like "Pipeline". "Everything Counts" is a classic, while "Shame" and "Love in Itself" are underrated. Songs like "More than a Party" and "The Landscape is Changing" really aren't that good though.
     
    -Some Great Reward-I always thought "Blasphemous Rumors" was overrated, and "Somebady"is cringe inducing. Other than that, this is a good album, with "People are People" and "Master and Servant" would be a big influence on Industrial Dance, and "Something to Do" and "Lie to Me" are great Moody songs.
     
    -Black Celebration-There are experiments in minimalism on some tracks, and they suprisingly work. Most of the album ("Sometimes" sucks though) is great, with a moody feeling that went over with synthpop fans. Not Tonight" is great, and "Stripped" is one of my favorite songs.
     
    -Music For The Masses-Their best album, and a major classic. Everything about it clicks, even the instrumentals. "Never Let Me Down" and "Strangelove" have almost stadium levels of awesomeness, while "To Have and To Hold" creates a great atmosphere. Hell, even the alternate takes on songs and mixes are great.
     
    -Violator-Everyone knows this album, so i won't say anything else.
     
    -Songs of Faith and Devotion-Too inspired by Nine Inch Nails, this one is alright. "Rush" and "Mercy in You" are way too chest thumping, and hardly sound like DM songs. "I Feel You" does feature great use of guitar feedback, and "Walking in My Shoes" has a great, almost trip-hop feeling to it.
     
    -Ultra-Their most underrated album. "Home" is the best Gore-sung song, while "It's no Good" features great synth work. Also, the use of guitars on "Useless" and "Barrel of a Gun" are great.
     
    -Exciter-Their worst studio album. It sounds too much like they're trying to re-create "Violator", and some of the songs just feel like remakes. "I Feel Love" is great though.
     
    -Playing The Angel-"Macrovision" is a shitty song. Other than that, this is a great album. Excellent use of analogue beats, and the songwriting is some of their best yet.
     
    That's all for now. Next Time: Moving out of my dorm.
  18. Gary Floyd
    -To Rolling Stone: Can't you do one issue without complaining about how much you hate Bush? Sure, I hate him too. Hell, I think he's one of the worst presidents we've ever had (not the worst, but one of them), but I don't obsess over the guy like you do. Besides, it's gotten tiresome that you have to have a 5,000+ word essay about why you hate him in every issue. I remember last year, when an article about the Michael Jackson trial became a big rant about Bush. Basically, it's time to hang it up guys.
     
    -Raw really sucked last night. Did we really need to see Vince McMahon's ass again? By the way Vince: The "Kiss My Ass" club was never funny, and it's not even creepy anymore. It's just annoying. Then again, this is Vince I'm talking about...
     
    That out of the way, the bump Lilian Garcia took was fucking nasty.
     
    -Remember folks: One more week until "Cemetary Man" comes out on DVD
     
    -I've been listening to a lot of Led Zeppelin today, and I still think that "Led Zeppelin III" is their best album. Sure, it's not as heavy on the drums as "Physical Graffiti", but I think songwriting wise, it's their best album. Plus, how could anybody hate the song "That's The Way"?
     
    -To Hotbutter Spoonbuster: Why are you so pissed off all the time?
     
    That's all for now. Next time: Depeche Mode albums
  19. Gary Floyd
    This entry is dedicated Hotbutter Spoonbuster, aka "TSM's answer to Tourettes Guy".
     
    -Been a busy week, and I'm fucking tired. I haven't had a good night's sleep in a while now.
     
    -I saw the piolet for "Korgoth of Barbaria" on Adult Swim last night, and it it's awesome. It's on again at 10:30 tonight, and I recommend it. Also, the new season of "The Venture Brothers" debuts June 25th.
     
    -The "9/11 Conspiracy Theories" thread on the CE folder is a great big pile of stupid. That's all I have to say about that.
     
    -Finally, my thoughts on Hotbutter Spoonbuster: This guy rules. I don't thinl he has any idea what he's saying, and he spews forth insults and profanity like he's internet celebrity Tourettes Guy. So here's to you HBSB: Don't you ever change.
     
     
  20. Gary Floyd
    There's a ton of horror movies out there, and just like albums, there are ones that don't get as much attention as they deserve. Here are some that I think deserve more attention.
     
    Trauma-Underappreciated movie from Dario Argento. Some say this was the start of his directorial downfall, but I'd disagree (I'd say it's "Phantom of the Opera"). Here, his daughter Asia stars as a bulemic girl who is taken into custody by a concerned cop. Oh, and there's a killer who decapitates his victems with a nifty noose device. Also, cool appearences from the likes of James Russo, Brado Dorrif, and Piper Laurie.
     
    Luther The Geek-No, not a nerd, but a circus geek. Here, a serial killer with a thing for biting necks (who also clucks like a chicken, and has a pair of cool metal dentures) is let out of jail-and terrorizes a mother, her daughter, her boyfriend, and a cop. Goofy, but oddly creepy.
     
    Warning Sign-Before there was "28 Days Later", there was this movie about a virus that infects the workers at a secret lab, turning them into maniacs whose skin is peeling off. The movie also stars Sam ("Law and Order") Waterson and Kathleen Quinlan.
     
    Blood Diner-Weird ass tribute to Hershell Gordon Lewis is one of the strangest horror comedies ever made. This movie deals with brothers trying to reawaken an Egyptian goddess by killing women-and that's just the start. From then on, we get zombies, cool visual gags ("battered girlfriend" is a favorite), and other things.
     
    Street Trash-A wall to wall celebration of bad taste, this sucker has liquor that causes people to melt and explode. Oh, and winos, necrophilia, gang rape, fart jokes, and a game of hot potato with a severed penis.
     
    Body Melt-More body exploding goodness. This time, it's a weight loss supplement. It's really confusing, but it's quit unforgettable, disgusting, and funny.
     
    The Stendhal Syndrome-Another underappreciated Film from Dario Argento. His daughter Asia stars again, this time as a police woman/past rape victim who finds herself slowly going insane while tracking down a serial killer. Interesting fact: When Stuart Gordon saw it, he was so disturbed he had to leave the theatre.
     
    I Drink Your Blood-Here's one kkktookmybabyaway might like: A cult of Charles Manson like hippies/devil worshippers get rabies, and cause havoc on a small town. Full of (poorly done) gore, bad acting, and other things that make 70's exploitation so awsome.
     
    Just Before Dawn-From the director of MST3K "favorite" "Squirm" and the cult favorite "Blue Sunshie" comes this cool little slasher, which mixes "Friday the 13th","Deliverance", and "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" into a fun little movie.
     
    Junk-Japanese rip-off of Italian zombie movies is still a blast in my eyes. Plus, it's got a hot naked zombie chick, and a zombie that eats it's own flesh.
     
    That's all for now. Next time: Whatever comes to mind.
  21. Gary Floyd
    Well, I'm back from my Memorial Day visit home. Nothing notable happened, so here's the uneventful events:
     
    -I finally bought The Sounds Dying To Tell This To You and Skinny Puppy's Last Rights. Both are great, especially The Sounds album. It's not great art, but it's a hell of a lot of fun.
     
    -I watched "Super Troopers". That movie just gets funnier everytime I see it. Come on, how could anybody hate that movie?
     
    -Also Watched "The Decline Of Western Civilization II: The Metal Years", and I liked it. It's a strange mix of depressing (Chris Holms drunk in his mother's pool) and hilarious (I have not seen that many people who dress alike since Highschool Gym). It's a bit suprising seeing that the band named Odin were a hair band, because with a name like that, you would expect something else.
     
    -Didn't watch Raw last night. Was it any good?
     
    -Preparing for finals this week and next week. Also, the weather here is nice, though I don't expect it to last very long.
     
    -It seems like Leena's new avatar has a picture of Jenna Haze. Good choice there.
     
    -Got a sunburn, but not a major one. I also ate a bunch of Peanuts, which lead to many trips to the bathroom.
     
    That's all for now. Next time: The worst movie sequals ever made.
  22. Gary Floyd

    Rooty Tooty Doo

    By Gary Floyd,

    -Well, I'm done with work for one of my classes. Other than that, it's buisiness as usual over here. It looks like its going to rain.
     
    -I'm not looking forward to X-Men 3. Why? Well, besides the fact that it's directed by the dude who did "Red Dragon" (I hated that movie), it looks like they're trying to put too much from the series into one movie.
     
    -WWE has officially ruined Trish Vs. Mickey thanks to the addition of Beth. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted. Plus, I knew they were going to ruin it somehow. Also, I'm sick and tired of Umaga. Smackdown already has a dreadful HOSS BY GAWD that can't be stopped, so why does Raw have to? Wait a minute, this is Raw I'm talking about...
     
    At least Smackdowns has had build-up.
     
    -A while back, I promised you a strange link, so here you go: bianca's Fetish Forum. Thanks to Something Awful for providing the link. Anyways, there's some weird shit here, but I think most of it's made up.
     
    That's all for now. Next time: Preperation for finals, the weather, and my Memorial Day visit to my parent's house.
  23. Gary Floyd
    -Well, the weather around here has really improved, though according to the Weather Channel, it will rain on Thursday.
     
    -Christ, college is really beating me with homework. I've got a second draft of a short story to complete, three reviews of short stories, an essay on a poem, and various other things. That's what you get in the last two weeks of college.
     
    -"The Da Vinci Code" is the #1 movie in America. Maybe I won't have to hear about it all of the time from the news now.
     
    -People in the community I live in are pretty fucking loud right now. I have constantly had to hear yelling cursing, yelling and cursing, and other such things every day and every night, and it's annoying.
     
    -I slept funny two nights ago, so right now, my shoulder is killing me. I can't even walk without feeling a bit of pain.
     
    Gotta go and do more homework. Next time: More complaints and grieviences, and maybe an amusing website.
  24. Gary Floyd
    Todays Mothers day. I already told my mom happy mothers day, so you don't need to worry about me telling that to my mom. Anyways, happy mothers day to the rest of the moms in the world.
     
    I didn't make Leena's list. Oh well. I'm a bit bored with her anyways.
     
    I wish I had more to say today, but I don't. MAybe I will next time.
  25. Gary Floyd
    Well, I'm done with my Business Writing Homework (for now at least). So, here's my picks for what I've liked, and what I didn't liked, in music so far.
     
    What I've Liked
     
    Ghostface Killah's Fishscale album-This sucker is the best album of the year so far. I listen to this album every week, and it just keeps getting better.
     
    Gnarls Barkley-From what I've heard, it sounds like another future purchase for me. Plus, it's Cee-Lo and the awesome Dangermouse.
     
    Mono's You Are There album-Another great album. I personally think this is going to be in the top post-rock albums of all time.
     
    The Sounds-Hell yes. Fun, unpretentious rock from Sweden. Plus, it's infectious as hell.
     
    Goldfrapp
     
    The new Prince album.
     
    What I Haven't Liked
     
    The New Revolting Cocks Album-Well, I like the song "Viagra Culture" (How can you not love a song with the line "My Weiner Must Win!"), but other than that, this album is a huge let. It doesn't even sound like a Revolting Cocks album.
     
    RHCP Stadium Arcadium-I've heard it from other people's dorms, and to be honest, I find it a bit disappointing.
     
    Keisha Cole-I'm sick and tired of hearing the song Love, though fortunately, I don't hear it as much as I used to.
     
    Just About Anything Emo. I really can't wait for this whole thing to end.
     
    The Editors-I don't care what anyone says: They are not better than Interpol. Hell, I find them unsatisfactory at best
     
    Artic Monkeys-Am I the only person who isn't creaming their pants over this band? They aren't that good.
     
    [b]Still Waiting For[/b]
     
    The new Current 93 album-Fortunately, it comes out really soon, so the wait won't be long.
     
    That's all for now. Next time: Whatever else come to mind, or something
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