"I am a casual fan"

[Guest OnlyMe]

This is sort of a piece of fiction. I am not a “casual fan” or anything like that. But the sentiments I express seem fairly common, and I hope, fairly accurate. Enjoy!

 

Also - this was written pre-Backlash, just after Mania, if any of the references seem a little out.

 

I am a casual WWE fan. I started watching in 1999, when I saw The Rock on a talk-show. I started watching wrestling, despite always thinking of it as “fake”, “scripted” and a “pantomime”. I enjoyed the brawling badass, Stone Cold Steve Austin, and the cocky, cool Rock. Mankind made me laugh, and Vince McMahon was an asshole. Combined, the characters made me want to watch. Wrestling perhaps wasn’t the main reason that I watched, mostly it was as close to a soap-opera as a man will admit to watching.

 

These characters were, for the most part, believable. Not steroid abusing, 7 foot freaks dressed in Lycra, as I had come to expect. Sure, there was some sillyness. Some of the things that happened weren’t totally believable, and some were downright wrong – Mae Young’s pregnancy for example. I accepted that though – I mean, the writers can’t ALWAYS get it right. Generally though, the bad parts were kept to a minimum.

 

The matches were interesting. They never lasted long enough for me to get bored, since really – who wants to see two people fighting for no reason. In a wrestling context, obviously. What I wanted to see was the T&A, the microphone play between Mick Foley and the Rock, Stone Cold handing out stunners to everyone and anyone, moments that make me say “holy shit!”

 

What I don’t want to see is 20 minute long, technical matches. They are boring. Sure, a side headlock into an armbar may hurt like hell, but I’d rather see 1000 chairshots than that. With a chairshot, there’s all the build up, waiting for the pain, then there’s the smash of steel on skull (well, usually steel on forearm, but let’s pretend), and the reeling impact. That is exciting. Someone laying on the ground while someone stands next to them pulling their arm is not exciting.

 

So, throughout 1999 the WWF was geared towards people like me. I don’t have ADD, but anything going for more than 5 minutes is boring. Unless it’s a really funny segment, or someone getting a severe ass kicking, there’s no need for it. This applies to matches too, as I have already said. But anyway, the WWF was what I wanted to see. The mix of things that were shown made it worth two hours on a Monday night, and later, two more on a Thursday.

 

As 2000 went on, the matches got longer. The segments stopped being funny. The T&A was there, but it’s the same people doing the same things. Strangely, this applied to the wrestling side too. “YAY! The Rock said “Jabronie”. He hasn’t done that since last week.” Stone Cold was gone, so that was one less reason to watch. Vince McMahon was now being an asshole to The Rock, which was kinda cool, but it’s like fake celebrity nudes. It’s there, and it’s alright, but deep down in your heart that it’s not what you want to see. You want the real thing – the original.

 

At the end of 2000, Stone Cold came back. And he was stunnering people in authority (Foley), and anyone else that he wanted to. It was good. It was less good the second time, then it was more and more boring. Because it was something I’d seen before. I’d seen him do it all the way through 1999, and he’d probably been doing it before then.

 

Early 2001, and Stone Cold became a bad guy. The people he was stunnering were now good guys instead of bad guys. He was also best friends with HHH, but they didn’t explain why, since a month ago they were trying to kill each other. Stone Cold was pretty annoying now, not really doing anything new. Him and HHH didn’t have any chemistry together, and so the times they were on TV together put me off. Going into Backlash together, they were to fight the Undertaker and Kane. I don’t think Kane had learned to speak at this point, so he wasn’t doing anything cool on screen. The Undertaker is a pretty rubbish actor, and he never looks like he gets hurt. I think it’s meant to make him look cool and big, but he just looks silly.

 

Also around this time, was something with Vince and Shane and WCW. I never watched WCW. I tried it one or two times, but there was nothing about it that interested me. The comedy wasn’t as good as the WWF. The characters didn’t draw me in straight away. The T&A wasn’t there. The hardcore violence wasn’t there. In short, WCW didn’t mean a whole lot to me. Soon though, there was a huge storyline about having WCW guys coming into the WWF.

 

The whole story didn’t really make sense to me, since these “rogue” WCW wrestlers were coming out of the WWF locker room area, on a WWF show, with their own theme music, and the WWF didn’t once think to just ask them to leave. I know there are plot holes in TV shows, but this was really silly, and I mostly stopped watching.

 

The other thing that put me off about the InVasion was the wrestlers. I know who the Rock is, I know who Stone Cold Steve Austin is and I know who the Big Show is.

 

For a long time, I was hooked by the “who is stalking the Undertaker’s wife?” storyline. It was novel, it was different and it had genuine intrigue. My guess was HHH, since he’d lost at Wrestlemania to the Undertaker and he wanted revenge. Then there was the big “unmasking.” The lights went out in the arena, and the Undertaker’s music hit. A masked figure on a bike came out, and took off his mask. Underneath was some awkward looking blonde guy, with big eyes. I had no idea who he was. JR knew, and said something like “That’s DDP, from WCW.” I had no idea who DDP was, and just didn’t care. I stopped watching the show then.

 

I did give King of the Ring a chance, and there was some black guy attacked Stone Cold in the main event. Booker T, I think his name was. Someone else from WCW that I didn’t know or care about.

 

In July, it seemed like nobody was keeping track of what was happening on screen. There was a strange bit with WCW guys attacking WCW guys, and then making up and being friends. Then came ECW, which apparently was like WCW, but never did anything. One of the commentators came out and shouted some stuff, and from then a load of WWF guys joined WCW. Along came two more guys that I’d never heard of though, Rob Van Dam and Tommy Dreamer.

 

Near the end of 2001, there was a guy came in called Ric Flair. He had white hair, and spoke in a slow drawl. I had never heard of him before, but I assume he was an owner or something. That same show marked the end of “WCW”, as it was apparently dead and buried. This Ric Flair guy, anyway, was apparently pretty important, but nobody ever bothered to tell me why.

 

I kept feeling as if wrestling was all just some secret club, and 1999 was just a lapse in their defences, as they’d finally allowed anyone to be involved. But then in 2001, everything became self-referential and non-inclusive again.

 

Early on in 2002, my interest was really waning. Vince wanted to kill the WWF (shouldn’t be too difficult, with him owning it and all…) but he decided to do it by bringing in someone called nWo. I’d heard of one of this group, as they apparently were – Hulk Hogan. Everyone knows Hulk Hogan. He looked old though, more like a worn down old man than a wrestler. The other two guys were the same, but I’d never heard of them before. I didn’t really care about two old men, since they looked like they couldn’t really wrestle either.

 

The nWo didn’t really do anything. Hulk Hogan had a row with the Rock, and Scott Hall with Steve Austin. It wasn’t really killing the WWF, as they had promised. There was no difference between the Austin and Hall match at Wrestlemania and the Jericho and HHH one. Nothing set the nWo apart from anyone else. Apparently, because they were legends, or former wrestlers, or whatever else, that meant they could get away with being dull.

 

This was where I stopped watching. I came in on the promise of comedy, violence and boobies. I left because of broken down wrestlers, instead of new, cool ones.

 

I tuned in the other day, for Wrestlemania. There was this really badass guy called Brock Lesnar. He was just starting as I stopped watching. This guy was really amazing, busting out all these really big moves against Kurt Angle. There was a video package too, for some guy named Goldberg. I think he was big in WCW, but I’m not really sure – since I never watched it.

 

I don’t think I’ll be watching next week. The Undertaker was still there, doing the same thing and beating 2 guys pretty much on his own. He looked bad, like he should have given up a while back. Stone Cold was doing the same thing he’s always been doing, and he was fighting the Rock. I’m sure I saw that match at Wrestlemania before. The Rock got pretty funny again, I like it when he tries to be a bad guy. HHH beat that Booker T guy, and Chris Jericho lost to another of those old guys, Shawn something. Hulk Hogan was there too, and he looked pretty bad – some old guy ran into his match so I guess there’ll be more of him.

 

I just want to see something new and different. I want comedy, violence and T&A. But I want NEW comedy, NEW violence, and NEW T&A. Not the same thing I’ve seen for the last four years.

 

Thank you for reading.

[Guest razazteca]

How cute the Anti-Smarkass movement has started again.

 

I just want to see something new and different. I want comedy, violence and T&A. But I want NEW comedy, NEW violence, and NEW T&A. Not the same thing I’ve seen for the last four years.

Go watch MTV Real World, sir, that way you can watch your favorite fiction drama show and while your at it go download Real Cancun............I know you have alot of time on your hands, its worth it for the T & A that you so desire so much.

 

Or you could leave the basement of your mom's house to find a date, worst case senarnio is that you will find a fat chick about the same size as you to play doctor with.

[Guest OnlyMe]

Mm-hm, you did notice the word fiction in the top line? The one I bolded? Thought so.

 

EDIT: Okay, I didn't bold it, but I bolded a bit that said pretty much the same thing.

[Guest razazteca]

Here is my FICTION reaction

 

Good Day Sir

 

 

 

 

I Said Good Day

[B. Brian Brunzell 0]

Man, you just described 95% of the audience that used to watch the WWF, and about 50% of the audience who watches it now. Nice work.

[Guest IDrinkRatsMilk]

Yeah, that's pretty good.

[Guest AndrewTS]

Er, no.

 

Casual fans can't write that intelligently. A lot of points make no sense in the casual fan mindset.

 

If you're actually just trying to create a profile of that mindset, it works. I would never believe a "casual fan" would write that, though.

 

And screw the casual fans, anyway. Teach them to like wrestling. I think wrestlers that do cool moves can be quite over with them, but how brain dead do you have to be to rather see a long string of chairshots than an actual match?

 

"OOOOH! CHAIR SMACK HURTY!! AGAIN!!! AGAIN!! *claps like a toddler*"

 

At least marks and smarks can agree on new wrestlers actually getting the ball, though. Vince won't allow it but there's some common ground.

[MooreMark 0]

I personally thought the Comedy of 2000 was way better then 1999.

 

2000 was the dawn of Team ECK!

[Guest OnlyMe]

If you're actually just trying to create a profile of that mindset, it works. I would never believe a "casual fan" would write that, though.

 

That was what I intended to do. I'm not 100% sure who the typical "casual fan" is, though.

[Guest AndrewTS]

By the way, I think casual fans would love RVD.

[Guest bps "The Truth" 21]

If you are the only wrestling program on TV...

 

and you are trying to be Comedy, Drama and Mystery...

 

Where are Wrestling fans supposed to watch Wrestling?

 

AKA: Why people aren't watching