The One and Only Calvin Szechstein Thread!

[Guest Thunderkid]

::TK drives by in his car and pelts Damaramu with frozen cheese balls::

 

....

 

::TK suddenly remembers he can't legally drive for another month and a half::

 

Oh shit...

 

::TK speeds off as the cops give chase::

[Damaramu 0]

Hey what the hell!?

*stops cops by acting injured then steals car and begins chase*

[CanadianChick 0]

Alright, the beer shots I can see, but a beltshot!?! You don't have a belt!

 

::hits TMD over the head with LOGIC~!::

[Damaramu 0]

I have this belt.....

*shows a giant belt with a big Texas belt buckle about as big as the WCW world title*

NOW THAT'S WHAT I CALL A BELT BUCKLE!

*beltshot*

[Stephen Joseph 0]

Brushes off CWM's beltshot because SJ had drunk a 12 pack of MOLSON before!

 

Kicks TMD in the Junk...and reminds everyone that anything TMD does is still being no-sold for another 4 days

 

Calls Bradshaw. Locks Bradshaw and TMD in a closet

 

Filled with baby oil.

[caboose 0]

::Out of literally nowhere Caboose pushes SJ into the closet before SJ can lock it. Caboose locks the closet shut. Wraps it in bubble wrap, puts it in a wooden crate and posts it to Thailand!::

[CanadianChick 0]

Oh yeah, newbies get no sold!

 

::No-sells::

[Damaramu 0]

Newbies can no sell to!

*no sells Bradshaw's advances and beats him over the head with Texas belt buckle....breaks out of closet and beats chest like gorilla*

I AM THE MIGHTY ONE!

*holds up He-Man sword*

I HAVE THE POWER!

*walks over to Canadian Chick and BPP*

Have you seen my Texas Belt buckle?

*beltshot*

Oh yeah....

[Damaramu 0]

Man this is getting worse than the Kronik/BOD match. NOBODY IS SELLING! Oh that reminds me......

*conditions hair*

[Stephen Joseph 0]

Umm TMD, by OAOAST law you cannot no-sell since you're a newb

 

Now, about Caboose...

 

SJ pulls out his insta-teleportation device to get the F out of that closet. He then mulls over how to get back at Caboose...

 

 

hmm....

[alfdogg 0]

*Unfortunately, SJ teleported into a shower, where Pat Patterson is waiting with a surprise*

[Damaramu 0]

Umm TMD, by OAOAST law you cannot no-sell since you're a newb

 

Now, about Caboose...

 

SJ pulls out his insta-teleportation device to get the F out of that closet. He then mulls over how to get back at Caboose...

 

 

hmm....

Is this like WWE backstage politics? You know an unwritten rule or tradition? Because if it is....*spits on it* I defy it.

[Zack Malibu 0]

Just no-sell his no-selling of you. He doesn't mean squat in this folder anyhow.

 

::spits on BPP, has midget impersonate him, then give him a low blow and an Earthquake splash::

[Stephen Joseph 0]

::No-sells, because this is the OAOCST, not the OAOZMT::

[Damaramu 0]

Oh so it's an unwritten rule.....then *spits on BPP*

[Zack Malibu 0]

::No-sells, because this is the OAOCST, not the OAOZMT::

...and yet, look what folder it's in. Remember where the champ came from. NEVER FORGET YOUR...I mean...HIS ROOTS!

[LaParkaYourCar 0]

Oh so it's an unwritten rule.....then *spits on BPP*

It didn't used to be unwritten. Someone forgot to write it in the new OAOAST description thread.

[Mystery Eskimo 0]

:: tapdances for no reason ::

[Damaramu 0]

Oh so it's an unwritten rule.....then *spits on BPP*

It didn't used to be unwritten. Someone forgot to write it in the new OAOAST description thread.

Well then........

*no sells everything because he can*

[Zack Malibu 0]

::Brings trampoline into thread. Starts bouncing since he's bored.::

[Chuck Woolery 0]

::leaps off ladder, hits trampoline and dropkicks Zack in the face::

 

I call that the Backyard Wrestling Special, beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyatch

[Guest Plushy Al Logan]

::Enters thread, and takes Chuck out with a clothesline from Hell. Plushy then drags Chuck's body into the showers, where Jason Voorhees and Scott Keith stand as guards::

[Chuck Woolery 0]

::telekinisizes Plushy Al Logan through a table::

[Zack Malibu 0]

Mario's homoeroticism is REALLY starting to scare me.

[Guest Plushy Al Logan]

::Jason destroys Chuck with a spinebuster to the tiles. Scott Keith takes Zack out with a crossbody. Plushy cant decide whether to start with Zack or Chuck first, so he just handcuff both of them to showerheads::

 

 

Zack, I'm like this in real life now too.

[Chuck Woolery 0]

...Christ.

 

::me no-sells and flies to an undisclosed location in Clan::

[Guest Plushy Al Logan]

::Seeing that Chuck has gone away, Plushy decides to concentrate on Zack, but Dungeon of Doom member Bradshaw runs in, and shows his master how it's done::

[Zack Malibu 0]

::Yawns, and watches on his TV at home, as the Zack doppleganger robot gets violated by Bradshaw, electrocuting the hoss in the process.::

 

ZM:"Good thing I've got a few hundred more of those in the basement."

[Guest Plushy Al Logan]

::Plushy and his two remaining thugs get in his Dungeon of Doom truck, and drive towards Zack's house. To speed up the process, Plushy doesent drive...55!::

[Zack Malibu 0]

::Zack's bored, so he leaves his house and goes...somewhere.::

 

FOILED AGAIN, MARIO~!