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Explain THIS TO ME


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Posted
We need a pool on when the first breast/genitalia euphemism will be used.  And, more importantly, exactly what said euphemism will be.

Before the end of January, and "delectable, glistening mound(s)."

Nah. New Year's Eve (posted on New Year's Day), and "glowing, lush orbs."

 

For the wang, I'm putting my money on "my hardness."

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Posted
Why can't I ever engage in a makeout session of gargantuan proportions?  Why doesn't a vortex-eyed Ukranian cutie ever pounce on me with unbridled ferocity and vigor? 

 

Some guys have all the luck.

Well do you have bubbilicious gum, and his world-renowned leather jacket and black jeans? Are you the paradigm of excellence?

Posted

No, but I do have his knack for outlandishly florid prose. But, alas, where I once had a surplus of words with which to festoon this post, I am now treading perilously close to a defecit. And so it is with a heavy heart that I bid you all farewell and good night.

Posted

ugly103.jpg

 

With my arm around her shoulder and with a wad of Bubbilicious gum (cherry flavor) in my mouth, I felt like the paradigm of excellence........my world-renowned leather jacket and black jeans, we had the attention of every adolesecent and adult there.

Guest subliminal_animal
Posted (edited)

I rooting for "Spicy McHaggis is a stinker that needs to never post again."

 

 

 

EDIT: I put "I" instead of "I'm." Although that blunder helps with the hilariousness of the original version, I'm cannot let it something like that go uncorrected.

Edited by subliminal_animal
Guest subliminal_animal
Posted

Hold the phone, because I've switched home teams and am now rooting for the option that showcases not only the above, but also my recent decision that Spicy McHaggis is a possible rip-off of me.

Guest subliminal_animal
Posted

Also, I think most of you aren't good enough to be making posts in this thread.

Posted

I read the first two pages and the last two pages.

 

Props to this guy for getting the girl. :cheers:

 

Loss of all respect for "reporting" how your dates went. :throwup:

 

The word "SUCKER" to all of you that read this whole thing. :P

Posted
I read the first two pages and the last two pages.

 

Props to this guy for getting the girl. :cheers:

 

Loss of all respect for "reporting" how your dates went. :throwup:

 

The word "SUCKER" to all of you that read this whole thing. :P

How are we suckers? None of us believed it from the beginning. We were just reading to see what stupidity he'd come up with next.

Posted

TSA I think it's funny that you would deny this NOW, after telling me and others that you found some truth to it.

 

I tell you, this has been a sham since he ever started talking to her"

 

There may have been a poster who obsessed over some russian girl in his class. It's POSSIBLE. But is he talking to her now? No! Never!

 

Admit it, I was right, always ;)

Posted
TSA I think it's funny that you would deny this NOW, after telling me and others that you found some truth to it.

 

I tell you, this has been a sham since he ever started talking to her"

 

There may have been a poster who obsessed over some russian girl in his class. It's POSSIBLE. But is he talking to her now? No! Never!

 

Admit it, I was right, always ;)

Hey I think he had a russian girl in his class and I believe he got her to go out with him.

But everything else, the boyfriend, the crying, the date descriptions....they're BS.

Posted

The whole time he was saying he slicked his hair back like Scott Hall just did it for me. Funniest shit ever.

Posted
TSA I think it's funny that you would deny this NOW, after telling me and others that you found some truth to it.

 

I tell you, this has been a sham since he ever started talking to her"

 

There may have been a poster who obsessed over some russian girl in his class. It's POSSIBLE. But is he talking to her now? No! Never!

 

Admit it, I was right, always ;)

I'm not denying anything. I think what he wrote was crap and it sounds so damn fake. Tony was reading it over my shoulder and both of us were laughing at the whole thing. I sounded like something right out of a cheesy romance novel.

Posted

Man, this is classic. Seriously...I read the whole thing through for shits and giggles, and I totally have the urge to turn this into a comedy teen flick. Seriously...the over the top language just begs out for it to be made into a movie. That rant at the football guy...comedy gold.

 

If I ever make it into a film, I'll give you a cut of the profits mvp :P

 

True or not...over-exaggerated or not...this is entertaining as hell.

 

Not to mention that description of a Gemini from early on fitted me perfectly, which was surprising.

Posted
Man, this is classic. Seriously...I read the whole thing through for shits and giggles, and I totally have the urge to turn this into a comedy teen flick. Seriously...the over the top language just begs out for it to be made into a movie. That rant at the football guy...comedy gold.

 

If I ever make it into a film, I'll give you a cut of the profits mvp :P

 

True or not...over-exaggerated or not...this is entertaining as hell.

 

Not to mention that description of a Gemini from early on fitted me perfectly, which was surprising.

I think it's funny that he picked a football player for his story. It makes it even more teen movie like. Because in those movies all High School football players are loudmouthed assholes looking to score.


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