Almanacs, the books of terroristic doom!

[Rob E Dangerously 0]

http://www.suntimes.com/output/terror/29alm.html

 

FBI urges police to watch for people carrying almanacs

 

December 29, 2003

 

BY TED BRIDIS ASSOCIATED PRESS Advertisement

 

 

 

 

 

 

WASHINGTON -- The FBI is warning police nationwide to be alert for people carrying almanacs, cautioning that the popular reference books covering everything from abbreviations to weather trends could be used for terrorist planning.

 

In a bulletin sent Christmas Eve to about 18,000 police organizations, the FBI said terrorists may use almanacs "to assist with target selection and pre-operational planning."

 

It urged officers to watch during searches, traffic stops and other investigations for anyone carrying almanacs, especially if the books are annotated in suspicious ways.

 

"The practice of researching potential targets is consistent with known methods of al-Qaida and other terrorist organizations that seek to maximize the likelihood of operational success through careful planning," the FBI wrote.

 

The Associated Press obtained a copy of the bulletin this week and verified its authenticity.

 

The FBI noted that use of almanacs or maps may be innocent, "the product of legitimate recreational or commercial activities." But it warned that when combined with suspicious behavior-- such as apparent surveillance-- a person with an almanac "may point to possible terrorist planning."

 

The FBI said information typically found in almanacs that could be useful for terrorists includes profiles of cities and states and information about waterways, bridges, dams, reservoirs, tunnels, buildings and landmarks. It said this information is often accompanied by photographs and maps.

 

The FBI urged police to report such discoveries to the local U.S. Joint Terrorism Task Force.

 

 

 

Copyright 2003 Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

[CanadianChris 0]

Good thing I turned in that old couple leafing through the almanacs in SmithBooks the other day. The police smacked them around a bit...it was a fun day.

[2GOLD 0]

Dear god...what if they have....a FARMERS ALMANAC!

 

I'm beginning to think the FBI may not be the smart group I thought they were.

[BX 0]

Wait until the FBI discovers the Interweb. It'll blow their mind.

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

Well if you dropped one of those things out of 10-story window and it landed on someone's head it could be a dangerous weapon...

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

I got a farmers almanac. I think I might start carrying it with me now where ever I go just to see what happens.

[Rob E Dangerously 0]

"Marvin's gonna use the phases of the moon and crop-production times to unleash deadly ebola!"

[Jobber of the Week 0]

It urged officers to watch during searches, traffic stops and other investigations for anyone carrying almanacs, especially if the books are annotated in suspicious ways.

 

"Look at this! Bomb! Just like home."

"Really? Could you annotate it?"

 

I think I can see where this is going. I await the alerrt informing us that all terrorists seen thus far have been wearing pants, and to be vigilant when around anyone wearing pants.

[Vern Gagne 0]

Look at what an Almanac has in it. It's perfectly understandle for the FBI to issue a warning about suspcious people with carrying almanacs.Besides, you can't leave out any possibility.

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

Of course the question is why would anyone be carrying an almanac with them in public?...

[Vern Gagne 0]

Well if you see a suspicious, young Arab male...OMG Racist Racial profiling, with an almanac alert authorities.

[Hogan Made Wrestling 0]

Maybe the FBI is worried about Muslim terrorists coming back through time in Deloreans with sports almanacs to win bets and finance their terrorist organizations...

[2GOLD 0]

Maybe the FBI is worried about Muslim terrorists coming back through time in Deloreans with sports almanacs to win bets and finance their terrorist organizations...

 

85 MILES PER HOUR OSAMA! 85 MPHS!

[Jobber of the Week 0]

Look at what an Almanac has in it. It's perfectly understandle for the FBI to issue a warning about suspcious people with carrying almanacs.Besides, you can't leave out any possibility.

Sorry if I'm a little more concerned about "The Anarchist's Cookbook" than "The Farmer's Almanac."

[Styles 0]

Maybe the FBI is worried about Muslim terrorists coming back through time in Deloreans with sports almanacs to win bets and finance their terrorist organizations...

OH, shit and Florida just won the world series!!! Coincidence!??!

[2GOLD 0]

Maybe the FBI is worried about Muslim terrorists coming back through time in Deloreans with sports almanacs to win bets and finance their terrorist organizations...

OH, shit and Florida just won the world series!!! Coincidence!??!

 

Damn them!

Did they HAVE to screw the Cubbies to do it?!?!?!

 

Stupid, stupid terrorists!

 

...wait...Steve Bartman...he vanished after the playoffs....

 

I KNEW IT! BARTMAN WAS OSAMA BIN LADEN!