The Dames' Diatribe on WWE Royal Rumble 2004

[Guest Anglesault]

Well, take the last shot, turn him around, and replace the towel with a pair of shorts held bunched up in his hand

[Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes]

......(cries) Why did I ask?! WHY!!! (punishes self by watching 12 hours of Test's worst matches and promos)

[2GOLD 0]

I don't know how, but just hearing about that made me sterile.

[CanadianChick 0]

Well, show me. I'm a teenage girl, I'm allowed to want to see this. But I'm starting to wonder about the rest of you...

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

We're all teenage girls here - metaphorically speaking.

[CanadianChick 0]

Not something to proud of RRR. Not at all.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Bitch

 

*slaps*

*pulls hair*

[CanadianChick 0]

You know I really hate to do this, but you've gone to far...

 

 

 

So, like, did you guys here that RRR is, like, a TOTAL slut? I mean, I heard, from a friend of a friend, who's also Jessica's cousin, that he totally made out with this guy while he was drunk. Like OMG, he's gay too! Like EW!

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

You have an unfair advantage~!!!!!

 

*goes off and cries*

[CanadianChick 0]

Ha! Can't tango with the teenage girl in a catty, gossip fest? Wuss.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Oh I can, but I can only take it so far. You -being an actual teenage girl (or so you say...)- have a competitive advantage over me -a metaphorical teenage girl, but an actual early 20's male (...or so I say). In the end, through all the broken nails and messed up mascara, I just can't reach into the depth of resources that is your experience as a teenage girl. It's a losing battle...

 

...and I heard you like Tommy Deluca!!! OMG!!! He's sooo gross!! I heard he actually kissed a cow... and by cow, I MEAN LINDSAY MCGEE!! OMG SHE'S SOOO GROSS!

 

(See, I just can't compete - that's the best I can do!)

[CanadianChick 0]

That's pathetic. Geez, you shouldn't have even posted that. You're an embarrassment to all wannabe-teenage girls.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

*sniff*

 

All I can be is me.

[Guest Goodear]

You need a 45% increase in the word 'like'. To whit...

 

"...and I LIKE heard you like Tommy Deluca!!! OMG!!! He's LIKE sooo gross!! I heard he actually kissed LIKE a cow... and by cow, I MEAN LIKE LINDSAY MCGEE!! OMG SHE'S SOOO GROSS!"

[Guest TheZsaszHorsemen]

If Benoit could see this... he'd be ashamed of you all.

 

ESPECIALLY the Canadians. You people should know better.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Hmm..

 

... interesting. This "like" concept; is there an exact ratio between "so" and "like"?? And are there other colloquialisms of the teenage female that I need to be aware of ?

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Benoit sees all.

[Guest Goodear]

Even when I do a #2? Benoit's a SICK FREAK!

 

</Family Guy paraphrase>

[Guest TheZsaszHorsemen]

Benoit sees all.

And he's not pleased with how few of your favorite PRIDE fighters seem to wear pants on a regular basis.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Benoit knows the flaws in man; Benoit doesn't care.

[CanadianChick 0]

Hmm..

 

... interesting. This "like" concept; is there an exact ratio between "so" and "like"?? And are there other colloquialisms of the teenage female that I need to be aware of ?

OMG is a big one.

[Guest TheZsaszHorsemen]

Benoit knows the flaws in man; Benoit doesn't care.

Benoit doesn't make moral judgments.

 

Benoit simply asks for pants to be worn. He's jealous for he lives in the Cold Northlands where pants must be worn in the winter months. Oh sure Benoit could go pantless if he really wanted to, he's tough enough, but he knows that no one wants to see his legs but Nancy Sullivan.

 

Fedor, please think of Benoit when you make the decision to, or not, to wear pants.

[Guest Goodear]

Hmm..

 

... interesting.  This "like" concept; is there an exact ratio between "so" and "like"??  And are there other colloquialisms of the teenage female that I need to be aware of ?

OMG is a big one.

But they actually still say the words right? I have yet to meet anyone who actually says OH-ME-GEE!

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Fedor, Russian God of Thunder, is not afraid of Benoit.

[CanadianChick 0]

Hmm..

 

... interesting.  This "like" concept; is there an exact ratio between "so" and "like"??  And are there other colloquialisms of the teenage female that I need to be aware of ?

OMG is a big one.

But they actually still say the words right? I have yet to meet anyone who actually says OH-ME-GEE!

I'm waiting for the day someone says the actual letters, but no, they actually say the words. Did you know that some people say 'LOL' is real life? Or 'j/king'? These people give me a bad name.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Or "ohmmguh"

[Guest TheZsaszHorsemen]

Fedor, Russian God of Thunder, is not afraid of Benoit.

Benoit does not ask for fear. He is above fear, he only asks for consideration.

[Guest Goodear]

I'm waiting with baited breath for someone to say 'Emoticon SMILEY FACE!' rather than just smiling.

[Guest Goodear]

Fedor, Russian God of Thunder, is not afraid of Benoit.

Benoit does not ask for fear. He is above fear, he only asks for consideration.

And bus fare.

[CanadianChick 0]

Apparently, according to girls in my school, the new word is 'chillax'. Think about it. I'm dreading the day my generation runs the country. Jesus Christ, help us all.