You'd better watch out, MrZsasz.

[The Czech Republic 0]

I got the lead role of Matthew Harrison Brady in my school's production of Inherit the Wind. I shall be a loud outspoken conservative who fights the concept of evolution...to his death~! This is the best role I've ever gotten in any show, and look forward to it very much. And hopefully I won't whine and bitch about being held down or other such nonsense...

[Slayer 0]

But can you use the casting couch as well as Zsasz?

[Art Sandusky 0]

I thought Czech was talking about me when he said that, too. Ah well.

[Hank Kingsley 0]

What a coincidence. I recently got the lead (well, one of the leads) for the our school's dinner theater production, "Reunion at Homicide High". I get to play Leonard Templeton III, a dickish, obnoxious, holier-than-thou divorice lawyer with a DARK SECRET~

[Boner Kawanger 0]

I'm starring in my theatre class' play, only we don't do...ya know....real plays, because no one would care except for three students. So I have to wear a fairy costume and go around acting as the Grim Reaper.

 

I'm not making this up.

 

I'm also not drunk.

[CanadianChick 0]

Our school's "drama department" is a grade 10 acting course and a musical every two years. No plays, just musicals.

 

Well, next year, there will be an Acting 12 course. Whoo, approving every year!

[Art Sandusky 0]

That pissed me off about my high school. They had nothing but musicals. Who the fuck likes musicals?

[Hoff 0]

*timidly raises hand*

[Art Sandusky 0]

(snickers at Hoff)

[Hoff 0]

Whatever. I was talking to West Side Story the other day and it said it could kick your ass. Its words, not mine.

[Slayer 0]

Death of a Salesman wants to challenge you to a fight, Hoff

 

If you manage to survive that, I think The Crucible has some words for you

[CanadianChick 0]

Don't get me wrong; the musicals are pretty good. But what about plays for the actors? I love being onstage, but because of my lack of singing ability, I can't be. Where is the justice?

[Art Sandusky 0]

Whatever. I was talking to West Side Story the other day and it said it could kick your ass. Its words, not mine.

What is it going to do, snap me to death?

[CanadianChick 0]

Come on Kotz, lighten up! Are you telling me you aren't feeling pretty and witty?

[Slayer 0]

Whatever.  I was talking to West Side Story the other day and it said it could kick your ass.  Its words, not mine.

What is it going to do, snap me to death?

"It's gonna be a fair fight!"

 

*stabs Kotz*

[The Czech Republic 0]

Kotzenjunge!

Come on Kotzenjunge!

Where are you?

Stab me, Kotzenjunge!

Hey Kotzenjunge, do your worst!

KOTZENJUNGE!!!!

[Fuzzy Dunlop 0]

None of you know me or care about me, but I've been Oberon in A Midsummer Night's Dream, Bailey in The Night Thoreau Spent In Jail, and some guy whose name I can not recall in some play about a teenager who could fly for some reason.

[Sandman9000 0]

I've acted like I've given a shit before.

 

Gimme my goddamn Oscar.

[Guest Anglesault]

I get to play Leonard Templeton III, a dickish, obnoxious,

::Resists typecasting joke.::

[godthedog 0]

picking up on the arthur miller references, i LOATHE that man's dialogue. those lines are SO FUCKING REDUNDANT AND CIRCULAR, it's impossible to memorize. my senior year of high school i played the dad in 'all my sons' and i remember in one exchange at the end of act II my lines went like:

 

"She's out of her mind."

"What's the matter with you?"

"What's the matter with you, what the hell's the matter with you?"

"She's out of her mind!"

 

it made me want to blow my brains out (which, appropriately enough, i got to do at the end of the play).

 

musicals are cool enough. they've got their good shows & their bad shows, like any genre. and with the right attitude (i.e., goof around and not give a shit), they're a lot of fun to act in. i remember giving my drama teacher an aneurysm during 'anything goes' with a character named mrs harcourt onstage & we improvised a bit where i wouldn't stop calling her "mrs hardcore." i also improvised a bit where i prostituted some of my female crew members to a stowaway. i got away with that one for 3 nights before the teacher caught that one.

 

and currently i'm playing the head bank robber in a journalism student's video project. i get to hold a condom wrapper in front of my girlfriend's face and say coldly, "I'm allergic to this brand." we start shooting tomorrow morning.