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King Cucaracha

The SWF Storm HOLT Report...

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-- Meh, I had some time on my hands so I threw this together. If I'm treading on anyone's toes doing this, or I just plain suck :P then nevermind...I just figured I might as well try and take over. --

 

 

The HOLT Report on SWF Storm

March 27th, 2004

Live from the Key Arena in Seattle, Washington

Report by Ray Robinson of Seattle WA, Smartmarks.com reader

 

 

Dark Matches:

 

- Michael Craven and Stryke beat John Aikman and Craig Steiner in 7:12 with a Spike Piledriver

 

- Todd Royal defeated "Big" John Quinn in 6:27 with The Wrath Of Todd. The Quinn guy was a lumberjack. WTF!?!

 

- Jimmy 'The Demon' Liston defeated Syndicate in 4:50 with the Descent.

 

- After the match, Todd came back out to a bunch of groans from the crowd, and said he wanted to read a chapter from the Book of Todd. We got a bunch of Todd sucks chants started up, but he just ignored them and pulled out the book. Can't remember much of what he said...we were too busy chanting at him to shut the f-ck up...but I think it had something to do with it being Todd's mission to take SWF gold for some reason or another.

 

Anyway, eventually the baseball bat 'CRACK!' hit, and the place ERUPTED as the commish Grand Slam walked out. He's still got it. We all wanted Grand Slam to kick Todd's ass, but instead he just told Todd to stop wasting everyone's time, because he had a big show lined up. Todd got real mad about the interuption and shoved Grand Slam...big mistake, as GS knocked him on his ass with a right hand! Great stuff. Todd took a while to recover, and got a 'nah nah nah nah, hey hey goodbye' chant once he finally left. Poor guy. :P

 

- Wildchild beat Judge Mental in 16:12 in one of the better matches of the night, after hitting The Wild Driver. Nice way to end the dark matches. They teased a handshake afterwards, but Judge pulled his hand away as a joke. They then went to shake again...but this time Wildchild booted Judge, and hit another Wild Driver to a big pop.

 

 

Lockdown:

 

- Well...I'm told Maddix arriving got onto the show. I assumed it was pre-show, seeing as it happened before the show opening pyro...but apparantely not. Seems us Seattle peeps are becoming protective of the Sonics...cheap heat or not, Maddix got the boos.

 

- Nice to see Johnny getting another win...and I tell you...that D.F.A is awesome in person. Everyone sitting around me gasped big-time when Johnny hit that mofo! The new guy James looked pretty decent in the ring, and he even got to kick out of the M.I Slam for some reason...but he's gonna need a few weeks to get accustomed to the big time.

 

- Coy West doing a Chef Boyardee commercial? Wouldn't that be considered 'up-market food' to him?

 

- A lot of the peeps around me were pissed about the Flesher/Clark situation, seeing as that was one of the main matches on the card. Then again, if Tom can't keep away from the buffet, he gets what he deserves. The Clark/Flesher match was my favourite of the night personally...and, again, it's just a pity they sold it as something it wasn't. Flesher spitting on the belt was awesome, if only for the fact ir probably means the return of the old, dick heel Taamo.

 

- Nice to see the Unholy Trinity being used as a trinity again. Toxxic getting creeped out was great...hell, he even got in a couple of cheap shots (SaturDace Night Fever... ) before it. And then Aecas and Bailey win their tag match...nice to see there's more than two teams in the fed, besides W&D and The House Of Todd...

 

- ...speaking of which, since when did this become the 'Toxxic and Maddix' show? I know they're light on heels, but sheesh! Thank god Clark interrupted that 'Maddixvaganza' or whatever the hell it was when he did. During the commercial, Clark grabbed the mic and started LAYING into Maddix. Verbally owning him. And apparantely the 'real' Alan Clark is back. Should be interesting.

 

- Onita and Matthews have to be the oddest team I've ever seen. Seriously.

 

- The triple threat match was very good...but I'm shocked that Coy's getting so over. Hell, I'm shocked I was joining in on the chants. I didn't like the guy at first, but he's growing on me. Duran meanwhile is a prick. In a good way. Nice to see Annie getting a big "ICHIBAN" chant during the commercials too.

 

- How Toxxic and Dace kept up the pace they went during that match I don't know...it was BRUTAL. I can't believe Toxxic won, and I can't believe that JIMMY LISTON was in the main event slot...one way or the other.

 

- After the show the Trinity stayed in the ring, and they looked pissed! Eventually Terrence/Janus grabbed the mic, and told Liston and Toxxic to get their asses back out into the ring and fight like men. Nothing happened, so Aecas got a 'they've got no balls' chants up and running until finally Liston and Toxxic walked back out. They got about halfway down the ramp, but then turned back and walked off...and man, was the crowd jeering them after that! The Trinity stuck around for a while, before we all started leaving.

 

 

Biggest Pops:

1. Charlie Matthews

2. Annie Onita

3. Coy West

4. The Unholy Trinity

5. Johnny Dangerous

 

Biggest Heat:

1. John Duran

2. Toxxic

3. Landon Maddix

4. Funyon for telling us Flesher/Clark was non-title

5. Tom Flesher (after the title dis-respecting)

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Guest ToddRoyal
- Todd Royal defeated "Big" John Quinn in 6:27 with The Wrath Of Todd. The Quinn guy was a lumberjack. WTF!?!

Holy crap! I won a match! I should count these dark matches in my official records so I don't look so crappy. "Todd Royal--- Beats Lumberjacks!"

 

GS knocked him on his ass with a right hand! Great stuff. Todd took a while to recover

 

Yup. That's better.

 

Oh, great job. Nice to see these continuing even if WC doesn't have the time. You better do this for EVERY show now, though. An expectation has been set...

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Well, I'll leave WC the PPV ones if he wants.

 

But now I've done one, I might as well do the rest. Hopefully they'll get better as time goes on...

It was fine, C. You did a good job with this one, and as long as they live up to this, that'll do just fine.

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Nice one Maddix! I always liked these and I'm glad someone's doing them, even if they're not "originals".

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