Nostalgia Trip: Jaws (NES)

[Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes]

I guess I'll make this a running gag, since I like to bust out (or Download) older games, and see how they compare to back in the day. So out comes the Nintendo Entertainment System and in comes...Jaws.

 

Now, everyone's probably thinking, it's a movie to game version of the classic 1975 movie starring Roy Scheider, Robert Shaw, and Richard Dreyfuss trying to rid the beaches of a small Long Island town of a killer great white shark.

 

Well, you all thought WRONG. Remember that brainfart named Jaws: the Revenge that was released in 1987, starring...some bitch and Michael Caine as HOAGIE? Well, this is what the game is from. Not only are movie to video game games incredibly shitty 9/10 times, but this time it's from the crappiest movie of all time!

 

The graphics of the game are sub-par at best with a tiny little boat floating around a bunch of blue stuff that is suppose to be water, and some orange yellowish things as islands. The shark in general is 3x bigger than the boat, and even the character you fight with is bigger!

 

To add things onto the pile of shit, the diver, which was Michael Brody in the movie, has an unlimited supply of spears, and it takes about 4,484,483,393 shots to beat the shark on Level 1 power. Other marine creatures include harmless sting ray and jelly fish, who all are mercilessly killed.

 

Once you finally beat the shark down, you enter a 3D like scene, you must :gasp: kill the shark by making it jump out of the water, roar like a LION, and stab it with a broken pillar of wood on the front of the boat.

 

The game can easily be beaten in 10 minutes, without exageration. Overall, a terrible game, and from an even worse of movie.

 

With my rambling out of the way, what are some other peoples opinions on this old "Classic" game from the golden age of 1987?

[Nighthawk 0]

There's an article about this over on x-entertainment you'd probably like. I won't bother to link since it's on the main page. Or maybe that's where all this is coming from.

[Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes]

There's an article about this over on x-entertainment you'd probably like. I won't bother to link since it's on the main page. Or maybe that's where all this is coming from.

Actually i've never seen the site. Is it a real review, or just random nonsense like this?

[Guest Askewniverse]

For some reason, I remember liking this game as a kid. Actually, scratch that. I liked the game until I came across that damn shark. I remember being excited when I finally got to fight the shark. Then the fight actually started and I became extremely frustrated at the amount of damage the shark could take. To this day, I've never actually beaten the shark. It seemed like the shark could take more damage than Jason Voorhees in the Friday the 13th game.

[Slayer 0]

It seemed like the shark could take more damage than Jason Voorhees in the Friday the 13th game.

Word

 

I spent far more time on this game as a kid then I ever should have, and still never beat it... hell I only made it to the last bit (stab the shart with the boat) once

[Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes]

Just read the dudes review on X-Ent., and DAMN he went all out for that one. He touched up everything possible from the littlest details. Next time I think I'll select a game no one likes or doesn't like to hate.

[Aero 0]

I used to love this game as a kid. I still don't think it's THAT bad. I could probably bust it out and have fun playing it.

[Jingus 0]

I actually just played this one about a month ago. And yeah, it's not very good.

 

The main problem is that your character starts out way too weak to possibly beat the shark. Even the mini-sharks take forever to kill with just Level 1 spears. So you have to sail around forever saving up the little tokens to level up to at least 3 or 4 to have a decent chance of killing it. But then, just when you've finally got enough juice to whack the damn shark, you'll blunder into some jellyfish or something stupid and die, having to start the level-up process all over again.

 

Oh well. At least it was better than Total Recall.

[Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes]

Oh well. At least it was better than Total Recall.

Well, at least Total Recall was better than RAMBO. BLECH!

[Nighthawk 0]

At least in Total Recall you could fight as a skeleton behind the x-ray scan, and jump through it. Well, you couldn't jump through it, but they showed you doing it. I loved that.

[NoCalMike 0]

the criss-crossing jellyfish that start appearing after you get up to level 3+ spears used to kill me more often then the Shark itself.

[The Tino Standard 0]

Don't knock Jaws, man!

 

This was a game I played tons of times when I was little, but could never beat. Now with an NES emulation disc for Dreamcast, I finally got another shot. About six weeks ago, I finally killed Jaws dead. Forget Benoit's title win at Wrestlemania... THIS was a victory 15 years in the making!

 

Horrible game? Maybe. But, DAMN it felt good to kill that big bastard.

[Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes]

How did people have trouble beating this game? the first time I EVER played it I beat the game in about twenty or so minutes, without dying once. THIS WAS WHEN I WAS FIVE!

 

I see Friday the 13th was mentioned. Now that game is a BITCH to beat.

[Skywarp! 0]

For me, It took an emulator to beat "Jaws," and a Game Genie to beat "Friday the 13th". Lame endings to both.

[Guest wildpegasus]

Oh well.  At least it was better than Total Recall.

Well, at least Total Recall was better than RAMBO. BLECH!

I liked Rambo.

[Slayer 0]

I liked Rambo as a kid, but I realized how much it sucked when I gave it another shot a couple of years ago

 

It didn't help that the password system never worked at all

[Jingus 0]

I kinda sorta liked Rambo, especially with my Game Genie lending me the assist. But damn, sometimes it was a bitch and a half to figure out where to go next. One of the more confusing games I've ever played. Oh, and that "get the prisoner and then jump through the wall" trick that got printed everywhere was really bullshit, I NEVER got it to work.

[NoCalMike 0]

As far as games go

 

Friday the 13th > Nightmare on Elm Street