Help me decide who will be the NEW

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

My choices:

 

Uncle Kracker is completely incapable of moving from the dead center of the musical road. Every song is a limp-wristed acoustic guitar porch song with an incredibly lame pop hook. His cover of "Drift Away" is a top 40 MOR radio staple, and I find it completely intolerable. The fact that he got his break through Kid Rock makes me detest his music even more.

 

3 Doors Down has similar problems, only their lead singer can't even carry a tune. In their new terrible single, "Here without you," his warbling vagaries about life being "overrated" but hoping that it gets better as it go-ewww-es makes my brow furrow. They are a bad bar band at best. How they are famous is quite seriously a mystery to me.

 

Nickelback wrote the same shitty song twice, and a couple albums worth of ones that sound exactly like it as well. An embarassment to Canada.

 

Saliva are the defending champions, but haven't put anything out in a while. I listed them only as incumbents, as apparently they've thankfully fallen off of the face of the earth.

 

Aerosmith is so old and tired. They've been playing the same old shit forever, and people still pretend it's new and original rock stuff. Staples for halftime shows, awards ceremonies, and any other bullshit where a big name rock band needs to show up. Honkin' on Bobo is also the stupidest name for an album I've ever heard. I don't expect them to win this, and they don't really deserve it, I just can't stand them.

 

GNR. Here's my horse. Axl Rose was never really THAT good in the first place, and the fact that he and his band can't even co exist has driven him to some weird spiral of denial, where he tries to throw random virtuosos and things together in an effort to cling to his past glory. Chinese Disappointment will probably never come out, despite the hype monster fuelling it for several years now. The fact that they're still so revered after making it on one hot album and at least 4 or 5 awful ones displeases me further. The Spagetti Incident? Fuck off.

 

Godsmack is a cross-eyed misrepresentation of heavy metal on a grand scale. Sully Erna's a graphic poser and failed sXe musician turned AIC cover band turned bar band frontman. Their C-tuning chugs permeate everything they write, as well as Sully's lyrics that cave in on their hollow structure, ending up as obvious Wicca and drug references and regrets, punctuated in GO AWAYS. Their acoustic release will hopefully be the turning point that sends them hurtling towards their Behind The Music destiny.

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

I honked on bobo.

[Red Baron 0]

I clicked Godsmack before seeing GNR and Aerosmith.

 

I'm surprised no MetallicA on here

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

Metallica's old hat.

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

It's almost admirable how Aerosmith stubbornly holds on to the past whilst pretending they're as fresh and exciting as any of these kids today.

 

GnR is barely a band; Axl Rose is a fucking joke. The constant folly that is his life excludes them from being "the worst."

[Red Baron 0]

It's almost admirable how Aerosmith stubbornly holds on to the past whilst pretending they're as fresh and exciting as any of these kids today.

Like Kiss..

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

I voted Nickelback

 

They're clearly doing an even greater mis-service to us Canucks than the Barenaked Ladies. The fact that these guys have the arrogance of the Rolling Stones and the talent of retarded donkey simply puts them over the top. And really, not only do they play their instruments like retarded donkeys...they also look like them too.

 

Down with Nickelback.

 

I'll say 3 Doors Down almost got my vote. Sadly some people think they are "***** band".

 

I know, They don't deserve the honour of having ear drums if they're wasting it on that contrived shit.

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

Kiss constantly defies logic. I will say that they don't view themselves as contempories of today's acts; unlike Aerosmith, Kiss hasn't worked with Pink or whoever.

 

That said, fuck Kiss, too. For all of Gene Simmons' grandstanding about how awful it is that no one in rock has fun anymore, he's as pretentious and full of shit as the morose posers he mocks.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

It's almost admirable how Aerosmith stubbornly holds on to the past whilst pretending they're as fresh and exciting as any of these kids today.

Like Kiss..

Kiss is, was, and forever will be terrible.

[Zorin Industries 0]

Guns N Roses, without question

[Paul Stanley 0]

I also honked on bobo, it sucked.

 

I never liked GNR.

 

I respect the opinion about KISS, but i'd rather listen to them than 40 of these new bands.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

Guns N Roses, without question

Appetite for Destruction was the greatest album that any of thsoe on that list ever released. They should at least get a reprieve for that.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

I also honked on bobo, it sucked.

He was meaning that he voted for them; not that he purchased the fucking album.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

I make an exception for Kiss, though. As much as I don't like any of their music at all, they weren't fucking around when they decided to make a brand. They can't help but be successful since everything is on such a huge scale. Kiss underwear, Kiss condoms, Kiss WHATEVER. Gene Simmons is a mixture of P.T. Barnum and the Simpson's marketing people with an axe-shaped bass. The fact that four goofy ugly white guys have made millions over a 30 year career by dressing in makeup and playing pop rock speaks volumes about the power of advertising and hype.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

Guns N Roses, without question

Appetite for Destruction was the greatest album that any of thsoe on that list ever released. They should at least get a reprieve for that.

I suppose. Three Doors Down really are worse musicians, but the past five years of GNR's nonexistence and constant adulation and anticipation deserves mention.

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

It's almost admirable how Aerosmith stubbornly holds on to the past whilst pretending they're as fresh and exciting as any of these kids today.

Like Kiss..

Kiss is, was, and forever will be terrible.

I don't agree with this. Kiss had some fun party songs--I have a fondness for "I Love it Loud" and "Love Gun"--but the schtick is 30-years-old. Drop it, guys.

[Zorin Industries 0]

Guns N Roses, without question

Appetite for Destruction was the greatest album that any of thsoe on that list ever released. They should at least get a reprieve for that.

Hmm, Guns N Roses just never did anything for me, even when I was listening to that sort of music a lot. It's only really grown into outright hatred over the past 4 years or so, because I hear it non-stop and every one is always telling me how brilliant they are.

[DCMaximo 0]

I've liked something by all of them, bar Godsmack. The fact they've named themselves after a great Alice In Chains song, despite being turgid dross of the highest nature, only heightened my desire to vote for them

[Guest FrigidSoul]

Where's Limp Bizkit? Since the lead guitarist left Fred Durst has written most of the music. Thing is, Fred Durst doesn't know what music is. He's horrible to listen to both in interviews and everything he writes seems to be bitching and moaning over his ex-girlfriend/wife/whatever she was.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

Godsmack is getting a lot of hate. In this instance, it makes me proud to know that I get to jam to Alanis Morrisette and Corey Hart songs instead.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

Where's Limp Bizkit? Since the lead guitarist left Fred Durst has written most of the music. Thing is, Fred Durst doesn't know what music is. He's horrible to listen to both in interviews and everything he writes seems to be bitching and moaning over his ex-girlfriend/wife/whatever she was.

There was a confused and angry period in my life that I would get loaded, steal my buddies Limp Bizkit cd, and make everyone listen to it. I blame drugs.

[Zorin Industries 0]

There was a confused and angry period in my life that I would get loaded, steal my buddies Limp Bizkit cd, and make everyone listen to it. I blame drugs.

I probably would have smacked you if you tried that near me

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

There was a confused and angry period in my life that I would get loaded, steal my buddies Limp Bizkit cd, and make everyone listen to it.  I blame drugs.

I probably would have smacked you if you tried that near me

I would've bottled you. I was not all that pleasant during that time. I was looking for a mate. Besides, many of my close friends didn't own that album, it was just when we would mesh with a large group of people would I be able to locate it, and play it.

[Zorin Industries 0]

I would've bottled you. I was not all that pleasant during that time. I was looking for a mate. Besides, many of my close friends didn't own that album, it was just when we would mesh with a large group of people would I be able to locate it, and play it.

Lots of people I hung out with at the time liked it, but it just annoyed me. It's the same as the Guns N Roses, it was been played around me so much that I grew to detest it. It just took the rest of the world a couple of years to catch up with me.

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

Banky's gonna start crying soon.

 

It's okay, man. Let this thread heal you.

[Guest FrigidSoul]

There was a confused and angry period in my life that I would get loaded, steal my buddies Limp Bizkit cd, and make everyone listen to it. I blame drugs.

I hope you've since appologised.

 

Drugs lead to me picking up the first two CDs since I did enjoy the guitarist. I haven't listened to them since becoming sober over a year ago though. Perhaps drugs are to blame for Limp Bizkit existing. Either way I recieved their 3rd CD(that Hotdog thingie) as a Christmas gift and immediately exchanged it for a copy of AC/DC's Back in Black. I'd sell the first two CDs now but I don't think anybody would pay for them.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

Banky's gonna start crying soon.

 

It's okay, man. Let this thread heal you.

As I explained to Inc

 

I was fresh out of high school, everyone was going to University, all my close buddies had mates, and I was smokign a lot of dope. I was tempermental, bitter, and lost in life - sadly, this bled into my taste in party music. But I'm better now on all fronts.

[Zorin Industries 0]

Don't do drugs, but when I drink I always feel the need to listen to Macho Man by the Village People. That probably means something pyschologicly, but I don't know what.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

The drugs made me angry and extremely moody...it didn't alter my taste in music that radically.

[Zorin Industries 0]

No, I listen to it other times as well, I just become obsessed with it when i'm drunk