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Guest Agent of Oblivion

The Official What I think You Look Like

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Guest Agent of Oblivion
Freckles

Don't own checkered shirt

 

These were ifs. I didn't say you had them, just that you'd be a good alfalfa were you to have them.

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Guest The Winter Of My Discontent
I say it's beautiful, but to each his own.

I've seen you, ya'ain't beautiful

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Guest Vitamin X

I guess I'll give it a whirl if Agent hasn't decided he's tired of this shit yet.

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Guest Agent of Oblivion

Sass as we all know, is a gigantic human being. This tells us nothing about his, face, though. I picture him as having a very broad and pronounced nose, and jolly high cheeks. His eyes are shiny squints, and he's well tanned, if a bit rosy. His body hair is absolutely gratuitous, which his tiny little girlfriend/wife/fiance/whatnot keeps in check like a window washer on a skyscraper. It takes a razor as wide as an industrial squeegee to get this man clean. His five o'clock shadow is perpetual, although he's losing just a little on top and up front. He has huge teeth and sounds like a groaning bison during the physical act of love. His better half is an interesting character because of this, as her primal instincts are so pronounced that she chose the largest and most powerful mate available. She probably shags like a minx.

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Guest evenflowDDT
P1010154.jpg

 

Incandenza: Top

 

JSYK: Bottom

More like this (and barron's). It's easier on the eyes.

 

:wub:

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Guest Agent of Oblivion

Marvinisalunatic has no hair, and that's impossible to get past. So that much is definite. His eyes bug out just a little bit, and are brown. Sharp downturned nose, and a rounded chin. He's a little overweight from being around food constantly, and is extremely well-scrubbed. This man's bathroom and kitchen are immaculate aside from a dirty towel on the floor. His bedroom however, is a laundry wreck. Only in this inner sanctum can he be shaggy and laid back, and he often watches movies in there because it's more comfy than his living room. Loves ice cream.

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Guest Agent of Oblivion

Kardo, Meatwad, Murmuring Beast, and Cartman.

 

four%20guys.jpg

 

Left to right. Cartman's got a huge penis, though. Kardo is jealous.

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Guest Agent of Oblivion

Spaceman Spiff has short fairly curly hair that is never sitting quite right. It's brown with light areas, he sunburns easily, but has tan limbs. His nails are bitten to the quick, and he's somewhat skittish, if totally unassuming and inconspicuous. He always wears a hat.

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Guest Agent of Oblivion

Kotzenjunge is a young Woody Allen on meth. Always going on about something, and moving his hands crazily, he is "go go go" even if he's lazier than hell about certain things, which his family calls him out on quite a bit. Physically speaking, he is totally normal, with a hairy belly which will just get rounder and hairier with age, though he'll do his best to hide it.

 

He'll meet a firecracker of a girl who will want to fight constantly, and get very frustrated when Spoon goes off topic. He'd make a great addict if he could pursue any one thing for a length of time.

 

As age strikes him, he'll slow down a bit and become more jaded. He'll have a kid with the firecracker girl, a daughter who won't like him, or her mother, or her middle name. Patrick will split from his wife over irreconcilable differences, but it won't kill his spirit. He'll do the job thing for a while, and some weeks before his 40th birthday, the midlife crisis will hit him like a ton of bricks when he falls madly in love with a Mediterranean 22 year old student of his. They'll wander off to Europe after a creepy courtship that both families will disapprove of, and they'll dance on the beach with their redheaded son who will turn out to be a marvelous tenor.

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Guest Agent of Oblivion

CanadianChick is leggy, slender, and healthy. She's the quintessential "good kid" with decent grades, and decent accolades in her activities, though she's not an overachiever. Her personality hasn't totally come to fruition yet, and she gets by on a sense of good clean fun and a nice smile. Still looking quite young, she has a whooping laugh, dimples, and is prone to looking at herself in the mirror and combing her hair to excess, though not out of vanity. Her teeth are flawless, aside from one chipped one.

 

The very picture of the girl next door who will probably turn out alright in the long run. She will never go to jail, although she will get her heart broken by a long haired blond guy while in college, at which point she might start drinking a little more, but it'll pass when she meets a nice guy she can predict, who is very attentive and loving, if a bit dull.

 

Why she bothers to post with the other bozos on here is beyond me. She doesn't seem like a pro wrestling type girl at all, unless it's primarily to oogle muscular guys in tights doing athletic springs and leaps.

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Guest Agent of Oblivion

Loss is a fiery gay man. Not so much flamboyant as outgoing, he goes for the clean cut hunky type, and has cried during movies. He reasserts his masculinity through some activities, but everyone who really knows him knows he's a big softie. He's also got a big nose, a nervous laugh, and wears too much cologne, although he's fairly well dressed, and in good shape. Not marathon-ready, but he gets some exercise, even if he loves sweets.

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Guest Loss
Loss is a fiery gay man.

Probably true.

 

Not so much flamboyant as outgoing, he goes for the clean cut hunky type, and has cried during movies.

 

Actually, believe it or not, I go for the slightly pudgy, hairy type who's into the same things I am. It's hard to find.

 

He reasserts his masculinity through some activities, but everyone who really knows him knows he's a big softie.

 

Well yeah.

 

He's also got a big nose, a nervous laugh, and wears too much cologne, although he's fairly well dressed, and in good shape.

 

I don't think I have a huge honker, but some of the rest is right on. I don't even wear cologne, believe it or not. And I need to be in much better shape.

 

Not marathon-ready, but he gets some exercise, even if he loves sweets.

 

Pretty close. I do get some exercise, but I'm always starting that process and not finishing it. And I don't really have a sweet tooth, but I have a huge weakness for spicy stuff.

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