The Czech Republic 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 It's been about a year since the day that we unleashed Tomko & Fertig, WWE Unscripted, and the John Cena Christmas Carol. Relive the memories. Tomko & Fertig: http://forums.thesmartmarks.com/index.php?showtopic=44580 WWE Unscripted: http://forums.thesmartmarks.com/index.php?...dpost&p=1101640 John Cena Christmas Carol: http://forums.thesmartmarks.com/index.php?...dpost&p=1100558 DVD Bonus Feature Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brett Favre 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Wow. Where was I for Cena's Christmas Carol? I'm touched. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RavishingRickRudo 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 > *"Could kayfabe work in this day and age..."* > *Special Typed Commentary from RavishingRickRudo* So, uh, I suppose I should introduce myself...I'm RavishingRickRudo and I am, uh, doing commentary for "Could kayfabe work in this day and age" also known as John Cena Christmas Carol. So uh, here we are. Downhome made one of his retarded posts and said "So sue me", I don't know why he said that. And here's my post, I really enjoyed making this post, it was short and sweet and it's one of the rare times I used the rolling eyes smilie. So there's an answer to a trivia question no one asked. The WWE is never compared to other shows on tv, despite it being a show on tv. When people start thinking like that, I believe, the show will get better. I'll step off my soapbox now. And now here comes a bunch of stuff that doesn't involve me, so I'll shut up until something interesting. And you can't spell interesting without I. Two I's, infact. *takes sip of coffee* And here comes Curry setting everything off with "the true meaning of", which was set up in the Tomko and Fertig thread - classic thread, might I add and it's where Czech throws in the Christmas reference and I chime in with "It Begins!", because that's how things start. Naturally. Organically. You can't just wake up one day and say "Hey, I'm going to make message board history." It starts when someone says one thing, someone else says another, and it just builds like a snowball rolling down a hill. The "all the canadian wrestlers work for Santa" was a pretty good idea, but I wanted to take it elsewhere. I hope I get to make that post someday. And now the Cena Clause. With my posts, you really have to have a good imagination. If you can't picture this in your head and give voice to the words, then it doesn't work. But if you can, it works really well. I started off with the "snowglobe" effect, which is a really nice, easy visual to get people into it. It's a cliched technique for a cliched story. The problem with writing posts like these is that no one will have the same voices for everyone, and the "narrator" is one of those times where you comprise that voice for the development of the story. *Laughs* Olar.... Olar, Olar, Olar *laughs* I love that name. It was initially going to be "Olaf", but that was the name of a dwarf in Zoolander. I just love the images here, classic christmas storytelling. Alright, now we are on page 2. I love the inclusion of "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!", it just 'worked'. The "it's Christmas" line is also great. Fantastic. I love it. And Downhome tries to take his thread back. Tsk Tsk Tsk. Poor boy never learns. So I set him straight after my initial point was ignored. That's Right, he got RUDPWN3D! Czech setting DH straight and telling him what time it is was just wonderful. Wonderful. Czech knows the score, and he always includes something that I overlook. Him having Cena rhyme is a nice touch that I would never have put in. *laughs* Manhunt! Oh man. hunt. *laughs* *sighs* ... I think he was going to say "Splooge", can I say that here? Sploooooge. This is an R rated Commentary Feature now! And now, what is a top 10 line of all time... "Andre: Ah am ze ghost of wrestling Christmas passssssst. Ho-gawnnnnnn!" I swear, I laugh every time I read this. Every single time. I have always professed a love for GH&Joe and this was straight up their style. Ho-gawnnnn! *laughs* *laughs* For all intents and purposes! I liked PN News. Sue me. He rapped when he went to the top, no one did that! The Trish thing, I felt, fell flat, but the Taker thing makes up for it in spades. TINY TAZZ! That's amazing. Word Life everyone! And this is me going nuts. And in the spirit of "I told you so", my "time" post... *silence* And now the proposal for the RAW review. It was never meant to be. I liked the prospect of it, but I think both Czech and I are too lazy to do anything about it. And here's a GH and Joe reference from Curry. The Raw Manefesto was so unique and should be manditory for everyone to read. Instead people are conditioned to read Scott Keith style recaps rather than something creative and funny. And it looks like the thread is getting back on topic. Those bastards. And there I am with the last post. IIRC TCR couldn't find it and I found it and bumped it. Truly a great, lost, thread. And um, and that's it. It was fun reliving this with you, gentle reader, and um.. keep watching the skies... 20th Century Fox ©, 2004 *Main Menu* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Czech Republic 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Dude, that was great. A fine addendum to a fine chapter of TSM. I'll do DVD commentary on Tomko & Fertig. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Czech Republic 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Ah, here we go. Tomko and Fertig. This was a true classic, in my eyes, because it actually predated the similiar Regal-Eugene storyline by four or five months. This guy, StevieNightHeat, he breaks the story of Bane and Seven from OVW coming up to WWE house shows but working under their real names. I wonder if Stevie posts here anymore. Okay, now in the beginning, I really struggled with the identities of the two characters and which direction I wanted to take them. I had some sort of tribute to the enemies from Final Fantasy games initially, and then something about Fertig having an unnaturally high sperm count, or being Jay Sherman's dad, but a lot of this went nowhere. It took intervention from Rudo to really get the ball rolling with what we all remember. Oh yeah, Special K. That was a nice gag. It didn't take off like I thought it would in the long-term, but it was good for a one-shot pop. "I fertig'd!" That was quality. Yep. The Rain Man and Radio references were pretty sweet, too. Tomko: Fertig! How did you get here? I'm trying to wrestle. Special K: My harness broke. HHH: (poses, spits water) OH man. "Broken harness" actually re-surfaced a few times after this when referring to Fertig. This one actually made me LOL, but I gotta say, the addition of "poses, spits water" really dates the joke. Really gives away that it's 2003. Rainbow suspenders. Surely Eugene did once. There's Slayer with the Mice And Men line, that was well played. Terri: Have you ever been with a girl before? *Fertig looks off into space while waving his hand around* Terri: You know, I find a man who wears a hockey helmet to be real sexy... *Terri puts hand on Fertigs thigh* Fertig: ooooOOOOOOh. Terri: And I just love a man who's not afraid to wear corduroy pants with a windbreaker and velcro shoes... Timeless. This gets me every time. Tomko: Hey Ric this is my brother Fertig Fertig: I'm Fertig, Fertig Fries Temko: Tell him the story Fertig Fertig: I like french fries Ric: Stares into space wondering what happened to get him in this angle This takes on a certain irony one year later as Flair's promos are sounding more like what he would've had to hear from Fertig. Impotence of the MIND, he says. Man, that's beautiful in its offensiveness. Hm there's a jab at the IC title's lack of credibility. Good thing Chris Jericho built it back up. Flowers for Algernon, Austin reacting to Fertig...I miss Steve now. There's Slayer, pointing out our references. Yeah, these were good times. 20th Century Fox ©, 2004 *Main Menu* WWE Unscripted: Bonus Commentary Choose language: ENGLISH ESPANOL FRANCAIS DEUTSCH BILL WALTON Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slayer 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 I was about to post about my lack of due credit, but Czech covered that in his second post Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slayer 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Their character depth will consist of yelling a lot while doing the FOUR HOSS MOVES OF DOOM! They took my advice on Tomko after all Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RavishingRickRudo 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 >*Main Menu* >*Special Features* >*"A November to Rememberer"* *Black screen* *Slow playing Piano music* "A November to Remember" "...er" *Slow fade to TSM* *Click on Tomko/Fertig thread* (RRR Voice-overs with inexplicable southern accent) "What was really special about November of 2003 was... it was special... a time in our history where opportunity for.. greatness... was high and we reached for the stars." *Continued Piano music* *Rudo is sitting in a leather chair with a blue background and is looking off screen* "How did it all start? Heh... I dunno, I ask myself that sometimes, how did it all start? Uuuuh... Nohvemmbur 8th... yeah, November 8th... that's uh, that's where the magic began." *Shows the thread in question* Title: "It started with... DOWNHOME?" (Czech narrates, with a high pitched, nerdish, nasaly, computer programmer accent) "It started off with a Downhome post, Ironically enough. *Picture of Downhome, or at least an approximation of what Downhome would look like. Which is a cross between John Waters and Larry King)* And, And it just spawned from there." Title: "Lord of the... Bling?" *LordoftheCurry is sitting on a park bench* "The Cena Christmas thing? Oh yeah, I remember it. Fuckin crazy ass shit man. Wait, can I say that? Fuck it. *looks off in the distance* Damn. Yo, look over there! Get that on tape! DAYAM! BOOTS! DATS BOOTS!" *Back to Rudo sitting on the chair* "It was a pretty simple concept... Cena, Christmas, learning the true meaning. Simple stuff. Yet so wonderful." Title: "A snowglobe, a giant" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Czech Republic 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Oh great, I'm supposed to sound like Bob Barron. I have a deeper voice than that and drop syllables out of words sometimes. It's a Midwest thing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RavishingRickRudo 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Don't you mean syllbles? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Czech Republic 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Wevver Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Amazing Rando 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 I'll consider this my birthday gift. I wish to have only done something HALF as respectable. *flashes picture of Mike Sanders Pony* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord of The Curry 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 The term is "That's a boot". Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RavishingRickRudo 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 You were looking at someones nice boots. I gave you a shoe fetish. Merry Christmas. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Czech Republic 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Take off those rubber boobs. This post was written in haste by a poster trying to meet a deadline. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slayer 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 The term is "That's a boot". Canadians, go home Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Amazing Rando 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 I Can Tie My SHOES!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RavishingRickRudo 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 You still get points for making fun of Downhome in your sig, Rando. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Amazing Rando 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 It's been almost a month since Downhome lost his mind, still searching for it in the aisles of his local FYE and Hollywood Video. Early reports say it is somewhere near Bikini Car Wash Company II Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slayer 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Elmo doesn't look very happy about his new skills Maybe if he put them to good use Like tying himself to a suicide bomb Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Amazing Rando 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 += Ha Ha Ha...that tickles! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slayer 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 This is still my favorite use of Elmo heretofore Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Amazing Rando 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 I hereby take this moment to announce that Elmo is being retired (because I can't top the "Elmo sad" post), and considers himself the luckiest red furry creature with a hand inside him on the face of the earth. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ted the Poster 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 If I haven't seen it, it's new to me! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheBigSwigg 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 This thread and the three it celebrates should be a requirement for all noobs. I'll be reading them for the next few weeks to try to improve my under developed sense of wit. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Then I hope you enjoy living underneath the wit poverty line. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Czech Republic 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Fuck off, Kotz. Sorry that I don't meet your lofty standards. Maybe if I just posted some blinking colored squares, you'd be more impressed by me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 I enjoyed them a bit from what I read of them. Doesn't seem to age very well though. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Public Account Report post Posted November 7, 2004 Worst Holiday EVER Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Czech Republic 0 Report post Posted November 7, 2004 I'll say. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
