SWF Lockdown Comments

[devo 0]

Show looks great and promo-packed. Actual comments in a little while.

[devo 0]

Excellent opening promo. That's how you promote a match. Ejiro vs. Wildchild should be fantastic. If it ends up being Wild vs. Dangerous at Ground Zero, I can only imagine how great a story that'd be.

 

 

The tag match was really good, but I'd be lying if I said that the following passage didn't catch my attention more than any other.

 

The crowd covered in all manner of viscous body fluids, all three nod to each other over a job well done

 

Eww. Anyway, the bit with King desperately drinking his way through the match was great, and I can't believe you guys actually stole that one guy's signature as an illustration for the ending. Well done. =)

 

BEST OUT OF FIVE~! The first matches between Toxxic and Pretzler have been amazing, and I'd imagine the remainder of the five will be just as good. Terrific promo.

 

So, Martial Law's gone. I see a trend of former partners turning against one another in this show. Anyway, cool promo, and it's gonna be great when these two meet.

 

Aw. I was looking forward to that Maddix/Buck match. =(

 

Mag's emo. Film at eleven.

 

Cruisercore, huh? I like it. Unfortunately, we don't have a champion like that yet, since Pretzler won with an excellent match. Extremely well written. I greatly enjoyed the bit in the middle with the two exchanging pinning moves. Very good ending that keeps Zyon strong while making Pretzler look even more like a complete dick.

 

Main event's co-written. See if you can tell which parts are Toxxic and which are mine. =)

[JJ Johnson 0]

I wish it were best of seven.

 

 

 

*sighs as visions of Magnum TA-Nikita Koloff dance through my head*

[devo 0]

Christ, guys, would it kill you to take even a cursory glance at the show?

[Angel_Grace_Blue 0]

Yes, yes it would. It would cause my liver to break down and I would spew blood from my ears, among other symptoms.

[Chuck Woolery 0]

I read the show. My thoughts (as negative as they may be) are as follows.

 

Toxx/Pretzler running a best-of-five this soon after Pretzler/Wildchild finished a best-of-three smacks of them trying to one-up Wildchild. I'm pretty sure I'm the only one who thinks that way, but eh.

 

I'm absolutely thrilled that we have several red-hot angles in the making, and in turn I would like to see another one over the International title.

 

Even though it's a "midcard" angle at the moment, the Ejiro/Wildchild/Dangerous drama is a dynamite angle and will lead to a very attractive Ground Zero match no matter who wins Ejiro/Wildchild.

 

Mags' angle is brilliant, but it will only work out if he can upend Danny on Smarkdown. I hope he does.

[devo 0]

Thank you Mike.

[JJ Johnson 0]

Mags, I will gladly take more than a cursory glance.

 

 

Much, much, MUCH more in-depth (compared to my last comments) comments later.

[Toxxic 0]

Eyes down look in on:

 

OPENING PROMOAGE

Well, Ejiro brings the goodness here as he talks about how life hasn't been all wine and roses since defeating the Evil One, and then Wildchild talks about banging Ejiro's sister (well, OK, maybe not) and then Johnny comes out with some five o'clock shadow and is FOCUSED ON THE TASK AT HAND~! Really though, this angle is oozing with potential. You have the possibility of something personal in there to give it added 'bite', but at the end of the day it IS about the World Title as well, as it should be. Johnny's 'beautiful people' and 'ugly people' shows one of two things, too; either he's been listening to too much Marilyn Manson, or the character is slowly continuing down the road towards self-serving heel. And that can only be a good thing.

 

And I think we all know the result we want here: Johnny Dangerous to win at Ground Zero, so I can take it off him in the Main Event of Genesis for the second year in a row

 

 

GRIFFSONOSITY vs MYERS AND A DALEK

Yeah, I don't think Manson and Griffon (well, Griffon anyway since Manson's apparently AWOL) took this all that seriously. Still a good short match though, with King drinking his way through and an emphasis on clotheslines. Soon they could be the only tag team left, unless Jarrod Banks ever digs those bullets out...

 

 

I PROMO WITH FLESHER

Basically, we're having a Best of Five. To one-up WC? Well, not really. More that we wanted space to have the feud develop from a friendly rivalry into something definitely UNfriendly, whereas WC and Pretz were instantly enemies so went all-out from the start. Plus it gives us something to do.

 

 

LANDON PROMOS

This is all good stuff. I think the nicest touch is King adding his own personal 'boo'. Landon is still an egotistical asswipe even when he's trying to be nice, and his last attempt is too little, too late... Of course i like the fact that it's mentioned I was right all along (but come on, what self-respecting super-heel WOULDN'T have tried a few minds games there?), and I for one am looking forward to the Cortez/Maddix showdown. I hope it keeps brewing for Genesis too, because the sneaky, cheating, flashy Landon vs the down-to-earth, street-fighting Cortez would be a great show.

 

 

LANDON vs BUCK THAT NEVER HAPPENED

Quick comedy moment. All good.

 

 

WILDCHILD AND MAGS

Ooh... one of ELM's justifications for not being good recently is that he 'barely managed' to beat Wildchild... I can't see that going down too well with THA GREATEST CRUISERWEIGHT OF ALLLLLLL TIME!

 

 

PRETZLER vs ZYON

Good to see those sound-effects being used. You run with that Pretz. Run all the way!

Anyway, the match. Although it's well-known that my knowledge of wrestling pyschology isn't great, it does appear to me that Pretz has put together a good match in terms of 'arrogant veteran vs youthful underdog'. Of course, their respective movesets only help with this as Pretzler is able to control the match with submissions (NOT restholds!) while Zyon occasionally breaks free and lets rip with his spot-tastic offence. In fact, a lot of things about this match make it good. I particularly like the credibility given to the finishers, as Pretzler struggles to apply the Snowflake Clutch and Zyon does everything in his power to avoid it. Pretzler also shows adaptability as instead of trying to get back to his feet to counter the Final Flash he plays possum, unlike the previous time. The only gripe I would have is with the outside count (the rest of the outside sequence was very good) as I'm sure it should have restarted when Pretzler exited the ring, even though Zyon pulled him out. Otherwise a great job, as it not only put Pretzler over as a formidable wrestler but made Zyon look very good at pulling tricks out of the bag to nearly get the upset.

 

 

MAIN EVENT

It's a co-write. Read it if you want. I'll just point out that I had to edit out ELM's commentary calling Toxxic a 'cockney' (for those who don't know, cockneys are people born within a certain area of London - specifically, within the sound of the Bow Bells. Toxxic is of course from Nottingham, and not even prevailing winds carry it that far north).

[Guest bennerisbetter]

I don't see how my match lost to Manson and Griffon's. The winning match was a complete squash that made my partner and I look like shit. Ghost Machine is 312 pounds, yet he was destroyed by smaller men. This might have been acceptable had they allowed him even ONE move. I tried to put my opponents over, beating them and still making them look good. I find it unfair and unrealistic that they won with a one sided squash. Can I have an explanation as to why their match was picked?

[Toxxic 0]

Post your match in a losing match thread, and we'll see. As with the Ejiro match, a better-written match can sometimes win out over a more 'dramatic' match despite differences in length or squashdom. On one infamous occassion, there was a rather obnoxious n00b present who was using a character called Candace Okimurra (basically his own walking wet dream of a small Japanese woman who did everything her manager wanted).

 

Candace was beating no-showers and becoming enormously arrogant as a result, not to mention thoroughly pissing off the fed with badly-written, ludicrous and sometimes downright offensive promos. Flesher, the then-Cruiserweight champion, was booked against her in a match and destroyed her with a 5k squash which gave her one or two offensive moves maximum. But he won, and fairly so, because his match was BETTER than the opposition.

 

If your match was on a par with Griffon's then if yours contained more back-and-forth offence I might have been inclined to say that yours was more deserving. However, Griff's might just be better. Post it, and we'll see.

 

Finally, your gimmick probably isn't helping. It's stupid. People aren't really inclined to take it seriously, and that might (I said MIGHT) count against you. In the early days of the fed when it was Mayor McCheese and Exploding Chicken, you might have had a better chance. But it's entirely up to you whether you decide to change that or not.

[JHawk 0]

I don't see how my match lost to Manson and Griffon's. The winning match was a complete squash that made my partner and I look like shit. Ghost Machine is 312 pounds, yet he was destroyed by smaller men. This might have been acceptable had they allowed him even ONE move. I tried to put my opponents over, beating them and still making them look good. I find it unfair and unrealistic that they won with a one sided squash. Can I have an explanation as to why their match was picked?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

I had actually thought you had written yourself to lose sine JL Crunk got beat down and you were talking about writing him out anyway. ::shrugs::

 

But trust me, we all have cases where we think the match we wrote is better than what won. I still think the International Title tournament match I had with Johnny Dangerous is the best thing I've written here, and that went as a loss.

 

As an aside, they were nice enough to have Myers get pinned, so it's not as if you're the one who "lost" the match in kayfabe terms.