Storm Comments~!

[JJ Johnson 0]

-And we start things off with a beautiful national anthem. Stirring. Really.

 

-The card! Boy, that curtain jerker must be exciting! Look who's in it!

 

-Nice opening promo, with much angle furthering. That's about all I can say about promos, because I'm not a good promo comment person, so don't take it as "Oh. Landon runs his mouth some more. I think I'll watch Three's Company instead of comment. Come and knock on our door..."

 

-AND THE RED LIGHT RUMBLE~! Hookers abound as Zyon retains. Very nice match, but a few complaints/things I found confusing.

 

JJ Johnson walks to the top of the ring steps and peels back his hood. Johnson’s determined face now revealed enters the ring…with pyro missing.

 

“I’m guessing Johnson wasn’t allowed his ring pyro.” Pete says.

 

I liked the "You learn something new every day" line in regards to King not knowing Flair was still alive, and that applies here also, because I learned I have ring pyro. To the best of my knowledge, I don't, but it's not a really big deal. I'm changing my entrance soon anyway, so maybe that'll clear it up.

 

“Toilet Cleaner, your mom doesn’t count.”

 

BURN!

 

BA-ZING! Moving on, the match is good with the usual amount of action, and with nothing worth bringing up until this:

 

Zyon grinds his teeth as his back shakes the steel before being pulled away. The former UFC fighter again tries to knee Zyon in the gut, but the youth blocks it before placing a forearm to the face of his opponent. JJ Johnson falls to the ground by one forearm???

 

Four question marks indeed. In a striking battle, an Ultimate Fighter should really be able to take out most of the roster, with the exception of Danny Williams, because he=teh HOSS-like striker. This isn't the only example of you outstriking me in the matchup, but it's the one that picked at me the most. So now I'm picking at it. That'll teach it.

 

I like the lariat off the apron. Neat spot.

 

The trash can is suddenly Yakuza booted into the face of Zyon. People in the front row cringe as the steel is imprinted by Zyon’s busted face. Zyon falls to the ground as Johnson looks through the trash can and picks out exactly what he wants…

 

“Oh great JJ Johnson off all people has found his way to a Kendo stick.” Pete is worried.

 

...that magically disappears! I found it odd that Johnson would pull out a kendo stick and then not do anything with it. One instant he has it, the next it's gone, and it doesn't show up for the rest of the match.

 

And you leave Chuck Norris alone, you bastard.

 

Zyon gets knocked to the mat as Johnson makes his way toward the dumpster of weapons and pulls out a baseball bat. Johnson then gets into a batting stance and as Zyon pulls himself up smacks the bat across the neck of his opponent.

 

Going back to what ELM said about your Smarkdown match and big bombs. I don't care who you are (unless, of course, you are Kibagami or HVilleThugg, both of which can no-sell ARMAGEDDON ITSELF), baseball bat to the back of the neck=KO, or worse.

 

The roughneck JJ Johnson has no idea on what is about to happen.

 

CLANK!

 

Shana hits Johnson across the back of his head with the lead pipe causing him to immediately let Zyon go.

 

So let me get this straight...Johnson goes down to one forearm, but no-sells a lead pipe? Prostitute or not, lead pipe hits suck. Hell, you ever played Clue? That thing knocked Mr. Boddy the fuck out.

 

And that's the last of the quotes, because I'm sick of typing the markups.

 

Top rope reverse hurricanrana...two count. Big bombs thing again.

 

I can't make a prostitute tap out? *self-esteem withers*

 

You write a spot where I put my whore on the top rope and have her jump off, but then you write that she jumps off the table. That just struck me as funny, and somewhat mentionable. Which is why it's here.

 

 

CRADLE PILEDRIVER! AND IT'S OVER! ZYON GOES BACK TO HIS HOTEL ROOM AND GETS LAID! ASSUMEDLY!

 

-GHOST MACHINE GETS OFFENSE! OMG! Cortez wins with a chokeout in a solid match that includes Ghost Machine getting lit on fire and Cortez pulling a New Jack off a second story balcony, then cuts a short but sweet promo.

 

AND WE MOVE ON TO...

 

-ELM blowing la gasketa! In an almost heelish sort of way! Yay for Danny not concussing the Magnifico one, though. After this we move to...

 

-MANSON blowing la gasketa! Pitcher to the face, 1 2 3, lonely Hulk music that fits with the promo posted on the board. Nicely done.

 

-Since, like I said, I'm not good at commenting on promos, I'll just mention that I love WC's accent. Sounds like he's going to give you a tarot reading. Yes, I am aware that this joke has most likely been made many, many times.

 

-Usual wildly entertaining spotfest from DubCee, with some mat wrestling mixed in, and some almost heelish managerial distraction from the younger Fasaki.

 

-Toxxic disses Peters old skool, then cuts a promo that basically said "I'll challenge for titles on my own bloody time."

 

-Landon with heelish flag waving. Not at all like Mags and his flag waving. That's face all the way baby.

 

King was right, this match was considerably less spotty than something I would expect to see either ELM or Landon in. Landon wins with the Land of Nod, and Mags can't catch a break. Which was the promo was about.

 

-More angle furthering, and a damn good match with Toxx-Pretz four(?). Brawling, ladders, boring restholds, IT'S ALL THERE! Toxx with the Intoxxication...ON THE APRON~!...for the win to end the show.

 

All in all, nice show. You bastards better read this, too, because I read a whole show for the first time so I could write this.

[Toxxic 0]

It's actually Toxxic-Pretz 3. The original 3 was scheduled to happen on Smarkdown but Spike (who hasn't been booked since then, for some reason) showed up and ruined our party so 4 will now take place on Smarkdown.

 

Further comments... sometime.

[Toshiaki Koala 0]

-More angle furthering, and a damn good match with Toxx-Pretz four(?). Brawling, ladders, boring restholds, IT'S ALL THERE! Toxx with the Intoxxication...ON THE APRON~!...for the win to end the show.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

They're technical restholds. And they're positively thrilling.

[devo 0]

Real cool opening promo. Landon's motivations are dead-on and completely believable, and, not to sound arrogant, remind me a lot of when I turned on CIA way back when. When Maddix and Cortez finally meet, it'll be fantastic.

 

Aw man, King just dogs on Pete throughout Zyon's entire match, heh. I can't say I was thrilled with the match's stip when I first saw it, but now that I read the match it produced, I'm reasonably pleased. Cool reversal out of the Dragon Sleeper.

 

Ohmygodaprostituebrokeitup!!

 

Ahahaha. Excellent.

 

Great match from Todd. The "tossing a hooker at Ghost as distraction" spot was really funny. Inventive use of the penis fountain, as well; I didn't imagine anyone would be using it to de-immolate themselves. Cortez sends a message by just choking out Ghost Machine, and again, I can't wait for the Maddix/Cortez contest.

 

ELM's pissed. Read all about it.

 

Nice surprise attack from Manson to open the match. That's the way you do it; catch your opponent off guard before your music announces you. "Whore bat" is fantastic. I love the spot with Manson drinking half of several bottles and then throwing them at Johnson.

 

Oooo. WC and Mel get all mushy. Ejiro's gonna be pissed. I'd almost say that she's just leading him on, but I'm not sure. Either way it's probably gonna lead to WC/Ejiro again, which is always good.

 

Oh shit, the psych handshake. That'd piss anyone off, and it did the trick with WC. The first five hundred words of the match are just dominated by onomatopoeia, heh. Very cool bit with Francis' conscience and the crowd forcing him to drop the Kendo stick, which speaks worlds about his character. Melissa's interference throughout the match was very well written; never overbearing or distracting, but the reader is constantly reminded that she's there, and as it turns out, she plays an imperative part in Wildchild's victory.

 

Toxxic's character grows deeper and more interesting with each show, I swear. His character's decision to focus on Pretzler and defy Flesher makes a lot of sense, and he makes a good point in realizing that even a Best of Five won't settle things between him and Pretzler. I'm anxious to see where all this ends up.

 

Nice entrance for Maddix; I didn't even think about the match being a Spain vs. Mexico thing. The bit with the dueling flags was pretty funny as well. The psychology is fantastic. Not only does Maddix constantly outspeed Magnifico, but he does so with traditional luchadore moves, which has gotta be a mindfuck for ELM. Very cool finish. Landon writes Montezuma's Revenge better than I ever have, heh.

 

The crowd interaction is extremely well written in the Toxxic/Pretzler match. It makes sense that there'd only be a few people there who understand what's going on, and that the hookers just want Toxxic's dick/money. The Back Drop to the outside spot was sick. That as much as anything else shows Toxxic's frustration with Pretzler. Cool spot with Scott taking a constiutional and Toxxic just heaving the chair out of the ring at him. Awesome ending. Intoxxication on the apron? Inventive, creative, and stiff as hell.

[Toxxic 0]

Awesome ending. Intoxxication on the apron? Inventive, creative, and stiff as hell.

 

Read: I nicked it from NOAH.

[zyon 0]

Opening Promo

 

This was a good promo from Landon. I love how he's playing the chicken heel. All the talking before Cortez's appearing really did play off Landon's ego. And after Cortez entrance the tease of him hurting Landon was cool.

 

Zyon vs JJ Johnson.

 

I'll comment on Johnson's critiques that I can only make sense of.

 

In your stats your entrance does say there is sparks coming from the ceiling and floor, which I had in. It also says there is sparks coming from the ring posts when you get to the ring. I guess I count sparks as pyro of some sort.

 

As for me outstriking you with one forearm. Well it wasn't me outstriking you it was you out smarting Zyon. Cause after you fell you grabbed a chair and blasted Zyon. The question marks were used to point out that something was fishy. As for me outstriking you in other parts during the match, well you can blame Chuck Norris for that (And the face that I'm still figuring out people's characters.)

 

Damn you are right about the Kendo Stick thing...my bad.

 

As for lead pipe-forearm comment. I explained the forearm and as for no selling the lead pipe. The shot came from a fatigued and very weak hooker what can you expect.

 

You could make a prostitute tap out, but I only meant for her to be in the hold for a few seconds. I guess the description led to you thinking she was in it for longer.

 

Reverse hurricarana, yeah its a big bomb thing. But its a signature move so I figured it can get the win, but it can be kicked out of too.

 

Yeah she jumped off the table...damn.

 

 

Ghost Machine vs. Todd Cortez

 

Fun match all around. Wasn't a total squash, but really put Cortez over as being pissed off. The commentating was also fun as well. The balcony moonsault was sweet. And a robot being set on fire is just great....or is he a robot?

 

ELM Promo

 

Liked the direction this was going in. Nicely written and yet another possible storyline has been added to the SWF.

 

Jay Hawke vs. The Incredible Manson

 

Fun match with a nasty ending. The Hulk music at the end was cool. Not much else to say.

 

WC Promo

 

Ok I'm really getting a peter parker/Mary J feeling from WC and Ejiro's sistser. Good promo keeping with the usual WC/Ejiro sister saga.

 

Mak Francis vs. Wildchild

 

Melissa Fasaki, ok thats her name. Well her involvment in the match added a nice element. I don't know if this was purposely though, but WC came off as an indirect heel with Fasaki getting involved and all. Thats probably just me though. Good match overall.

 

Toxxic Promo...Word

 

Promo that got the point of the series being more about pride than titles. And it being more about Flesher's amusement than anything else.

 

Landon vs. ELM

 

Flag stuff was fun. Liked the heel Landon character. ELM played face in peril most of the match, which added to it I believe. The ending sequence was cool and the match as a whole was a fun read.

 

Pretzler vs. Toxxic

 

Beginning of match is a nice touch, showing that these too are nearing the hatred. Pretzler rules...enjoyed the "boring" beginning. The multiple chants and words from the crowd are fun to read as is "Christ on a Cracker." The ladder spots are great as well. Great hardcore match.

 

Again another good show in my eyes. And the promo's were good as were the matches.

[JJ Johnson 0]

In your stats your entrance does say there is sparks coming from the ceiling and floor, which I had in. It also says there is sparks coming from the ring posts when you get to the ring. I guess I count sparks as pyro of some sort

 

 

Holy shit. I completely forgot about the ringpost sparks. I put those in there and completely forgot about them.

 

*goes and edits them out of entrance because ironically enough, he's never used them*

 

As for me outstriking you in other parts during the match, well you can blame Chuck Norris for that (And the face that I'm still figuring out people's characters.)

 

And all this time I was sticking up for him! Norris, you double-crossing bastard!

[muzz 0]

Good comments guys.

[Toxxic 0]

'Good card'... 'good comments'... Ladies and gentlemen, Muzz has achieved his true vocation of motivational speaker.

 

Yeah, I'm scared too.

[Above Average 0]

I agree with Muzz. Good comments.