Comments which don't warrant a thread

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

Edge needs a match that he'll win - I want his streak to continue, but I'm sure it will have to end.

 

I'm hearing a lot of noise about Helms and Crazy being in the Rumble (I didn't pay much attention to the graphic last night), but at last check WWE.com only added Khali with two spots open.

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

I hate cheaters

By Elijah Burke

Written: January 19, 2007

 

In this new ECW.com exclusive feature, Elijah Burke shares with you a unique experience, the "Elijah Experience." Be sure to check back each week for the latest entry from Elijah.

 

Is it me, or does it seems that the rules to a man-to-man fight have somehow changed? Actually, the rules haven't changed; it's been unfair for quite awhile, which is why in this edition of the Experience, YOUR host of hosts and YOUR guiding light is here to shine some light on this issue.

 

Now, since many of you have probably never been in a fight (and if you were, you'd more than likely got your BUTT kicked), I'll use an example of something that you all can relate to: cartoons.

 

First, let’s take a look at one of the greatest cartoon feuds of all time: Popeye vs. Bluto! There you have two men who believed that somehow a stick creature named Olive Oyl was the most beautiful woman they've ever seen (personally, I thought the Sea Hag looked much better). Being the men that they were, they would often fight for Olive Oyl's affection. In the end, after eating spinach that gives him superhuman strength ("advantage"), Popeye always defeated Bluto.

 

Then there's He-Man vs. Skeletor. You have the good 'ol pretty boy savior of Castle Grayskull vs. the crafty sorcerer. Let’s face it, if you're going to a swordfight then bring a sword. But why bring a sword full of magic power that gives you a decisive "advantage" in what is supposed to be a man-to-man fight? Where's the respect for the elderly? Skeletor had to be at least eight centuries old, but you all cheered He-Man as he beat, battered and disrespected a senior citizen.

 

Last but not least (and this one really ticks me off), Road Runner vs. Wile E. Coyote. Nuff said!

 

Do you see the trend here? I'm sure all of you lower life morons cheer for whom you perceive to be the "good guys" during these classic feuds, but they're actually not good at all. They're all cheaters who needed an advantage to win. I HATE cheaters, including your real-life Popeye/He-Man, the ECW icon Sandman.

 

Sandman is no different from any of the above mentioned "good guys." Good guys are supposed to overcome the odds, not create them. Here's a guy that always wants to fight, but doesn’t believe in fighting fair. Why bring a Singapore Cane to a fistfight? I know why; to have an "advantage." All of you support this drunk as he staggers through the crowd and into the ring, where he places the very existence of humanity in danger. Cane or no cane, Sandman can't measure up to the Elijah Experience and he knows that.

 

Sandman is a cheater who fears YOUR "Paragon of Virtue" and knows that he's one experience away from being knocked completely sober… forever!

 

Editor’s note: Don't agree with me? Send me your thoughts, comments and questions to [email protected]. Next week, in this column, YOUR “Paragon of Virtue” responds publicly to your emails!

[Thanks for the Fish 0]

Undertaker vs Batista shouldn't be face vs face and the fact it is tells me that Batista is winning the match. Batista could easily heel in the storylines and would probably be more effective. By attacking Kennedy last week, it already lays the foundation for him running form The Undertaker. Taker is HUGE in Detroit for whatever reason and Batista winning is going to get him booed out of the stadium. If they heeled Batista and had Undertaker win the title it would probably blow the roof off the place.

 

Also it would allow HBK vs Cena face vs face, which I think it the only way Raw can go and deliver a WM calibre title match. Edge vs Cena has been done and nobody really wants to see Orton vs Cena. I wonder if this match will develop into a triple threat HBK vs Cena vs Edge/Orton. Including all four would be too conveluted.

 

I don't want the Trump/McMahon storyline to revolve around trying to elevate scrubs. Rob Conway vs Carlito would be lame as hell.

 

I think Hogan backed by McMahon and have Shane as Trumps Apprentice. Trunp could further pay Khali to be Shanes bodyguard sorta deal. There could be a storyline where McMahon picks Hogan first and this pisses of Shane to no end and causes him to side with Trump. There could be the deal where Shane accuses Vince of being resentful of Shane because he was never a musclehead and that he doesn't bleed the wrestling business, and that Vince wishes Hogan was his son because Vince often called Hogan and Hulkamania his greatest success, even above his family.

[2GOLD 0]

“Paragon of Virtue”

 

So THAT's where he went. Be became a wrestler for ECW.

[Cheech Tremendous 0]

Undertaker vs Batista shouldn't be face vs face and the fact it is tells me that Batista is winning the match. Batista could easily heel in the storylines and would probably be more effective. By attacking Kennedy last week, it already lays the foundation for him running form The Undertaker. Taker is HUGE in Detroit for whatever reason and Batista winning is going to get him booed out of the stadium. If they heeled Batista and had Undertaker win the title it would probably blow the roof off the place.

 

Wouldn't it make more sense to do face/face at Mania with Taker winning? Then you could have Batista turn heel in the aftermath and build to a spring program with Batista regaining the belt.

[muzz 0]

http://www.wwe.com/shows/royalrumble/exclusives/rrecs

 

"Don’t: Try to pin someone

 

Dear Mr. Savage circa 1993, do you see a ref in the ring? Neither do we. Maybe that’s because the Royal Rumble Match is an OVER-THE-TOP-ROPE Battle Royal, silly. Next time you’re in the Royal Rumble you better study up on the rules, but don’t worry, it’s probably going to be a while."

 

"Do: Make sure you have a will beforehand

 

When you step into the ring with WWE Superstars, you might just need it."

 

This should also be serious advice for anyone getting in the ring with someone like Khali.

 

I got a kick out of the Viscera pic.

[TheFranchise 0]

http://www.wwe.com/shows/royalrumble/exclusives/rrecs

 

"Don’t: Try to pin someone

 

Dear Mr. Savage circa 1993, do you see a ref in the ring? Neither do we. Maybe that’s because the Royal Rumble Match is an OVER-THE-TOP-ROPE Battle Royal, silly. Next time you’re in the Royal Rumble you better study up on the rules, but don’t worry, it’s probably going to be a while."

 

Don’t: Eliminate yourself

 

Mick Foley must have still been recovering from a chair shot to the head when he abandoned ship during the 2004 Royal Rumble Match. To Mick’s credit, he did eliminate himself to beat down Randy Orton, so who can really blame him?

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

Helms was officially placed in the match on WWE.com, leaving one blank (either Super Crazy as previously mentioned, or perhaps changed to Marquis)

[Dobbs 3K 0]

You'd think they'd have at least one surprise entrant, even if it is a "WWE legend" or something.

[Hawk 34 0]

You'd think they'd have at least one surprise entrant, even if it is a "WWE legend" or something.

 

Or: "HOOOOOOOOOOO!". Not quite sure if the brief pop is worth taking SUPER CRAZY out.

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

Backlund has been eliminated from the Ultimate Rumble

 

Keep those votes for Luger to be tossed coming.

[TheFranchise 0]

You'd think they'd have at least one surprise entrant, even if it is a "WWE legend" or something.

 

Or: "HOOOOOOOOOOO!". Not quite sure if the brief pop is worth taking SUPER CRAZY out.

He's SUPER!!

[Cheech Tremendous 0]

Do you think Lex Luger will be tossed out next?

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

HE'S CRAZY!

[Hawk 34 0]

These voters don't know their Rumble history. Martel would never be eliminated so early. Also, this is a battle royal format anyways.

[fazzle 0]

For the third straight round, I'm voting for Valentine to be tossed. Luger will probably be the next person I'll vote for after the Hammer.

[Cheech Tremendous 0]

I throw you guys a softball and no one bothers to take a swing. What is this place coming to?

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

Hawk's follow up to "He's Super!" / "He's Crazy!" flow was a letdown, though he made a good point.

 

Useless Rumble 2007 stats:

 

Of the 29 announced names, only 8 have not tasted gold in WWE (Chris Masters, Miz, MVP, CM Punk, Sabu, Sandman, Khali, and Kevin Thorn). That number can be lowered to 6 if you retcon Sandman and Sabu as holding a title currently active in the WWE.

 

There are 12 former world champions (WWE/ECW) in the Rumble.

 

There are 4 current title holders in the Rumble.

 

There are 3 former Rumble winners involved this year (way up from 2004's zero, but down from 2006's four).

 

If Gregory Helms can last more than 2 minutes and 2 seconds, he will have outlasted his entire ring time from his last 3 Rumble matches combined.

 

On the flip side, Benoit has twice gone from the opening of the match until the #30th entrant has come out (1:01:30 in 2004 and 47:26 in 2005) as well as putting in a good 30:31 showing in 2006. However, each year seems to be shorter by approximately 15 minutes. What will 2007 bring?

 

 

Like I said, these are pretty useless stats.

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

I throw you guys a softball and no one bothers to take a swing. What is this place coming to?

 

I don't get the "I don't know / this shirt is too tight Billy" (or whatever people were, to me, randomly yelling) internet meme so I passed. Hawk 34 passed on the "He's Super Crazy!" set up so it's all good.

[billdynamite 0]

fuck it, i'll do it.

 

Do you think Lex Luger will be tossed out next?

 

I DONT KNOOOOW~!!

[Cheech Tremendous 0]

Thanks. I feel a lot better now.

[billdynamite 0]

Thanks. I feel a lot better now.

 

I'm pissed now.

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

hehe... "I don't knowii". Can't use a w and two !'s, guys. Blame Marvin.

[TheFranchise 0]

Yeah, I wanted to know about the W !! thing.

[billdynamite 0]

hehe... "I don't knowii". Can't use a w and two !'s, guys. Blame Marvin.

 

ha, i noticed that. what the hell is that about? looks like Luger is promoting Nintendo that way.

[fazzle 0]

Santana and Valentine are the next 2 eliminated from the UR. My next vote went to Hacksaw.

[fazzle 0]

WWE.com has a poll to vote for the latest Boogeyman Shirt

 

 

 

 

 

Voted for 2, but, once again, they're all horrible. 2 could be good if his face was more indistinguishable. And of course, if they got rid of the big white lettering saying Boogeyman on the back.

[Aero 0]

WWE.com says that tonight's ECW main event has been changed from Lashley vs. Holly to Lashley vs. Test... yes, they're apparently giving away the PPV match for free.

[fazzle 0]

which probably means the ending will cause the PPV match to be changed into something with a gimmick.

 

my guess: belt shot leading to DQ leading to extreme rules at the Rumble.

 

 

More retarded on WWE.com though, is the fact that there's a story up there talking about how nobody gives a shit about Vince vs. Trump.

[Downhome 0]

It is a non-title match though, but still stupid. That said, it isn't like anyone is going to buy the Rumble for that match anyway. I don't think having it on TV is going to hurt anything at all.