Mundane Sports Achievements

[Guest Gym Class Fallout]

I was shooting garbage can free throws and made like five in a row just now from about nine feet.

 

Share your own mundane sports achievements.

 

Oh, I have another one. Junior year of high school, we had to play volleyball, but I'm terrible at volleyball because I don't enjoy it. However, I discovered that I had an unbeatable serve, because I was doing it wrong. I can't describe exactly what I did, but I could deliver ace after ace when it was my turn to serve, then just zone out for the rest of the game.

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

Just ours? I recall when I was about 13, telling my dad what my lifetime batting average was in little league. Won a trophy for Highest Average in bowling in a summer league when I was eight. This again came up with my mom and dad when I moved out. My mom insisted she kept all my trophies from when I was a child, and I didn't see the need. My dad agreed, citing if it wasn't in any kind of "hall of fame or museum, fuck it."

 

I remember watching golf in the fall a couple years ago and a graphic was shown saying how much under par the tour was for the year, cumulative, which seemed pretty silly.

 

 

[Guest Gym Class Fallout]

It was my family's annual mini-golf outing last August, over at Par King in Lincolnshire. It's really gimmicky, with lots of bells and whistles and obstacles and so forth. On one of the holes, you had to hit it up a ramp and hope that it went down the correct hole out of three that would give you the best placement relative to the hole. Rather than bothering with this, I elected to circumvent the whole thing by turning 90 degrees and just aiming toward the hole, lofting it over the guardrail just as much as a putter will allow, I guess. I was able to get it in with two strokes, while everyone else putzed around with the ramp, taking four or five. Cheat to win.

 

This was eclipsed by my grandmother notching three consecutive holes-in-one.

[Edwin MacPhisto 0]

When I played Little League in 4th grade, I had pretty much the highest on-base percentage of anyone on the team, or in the rest of the league for that matter. I was about 4' 6", had no strike zone to speak of, and batted lefty, so I almost always got walked on 4 or 5 pitches or hit in the side. I ruled that shit.

 

EDIT: Czech, to this day I still pull those same moves at mini-golf courses. Fuck you windmill, I'm chipping across the river.

[CanadianChris 0]

I shot a hole-in-one on the eighth hole at Crowbush Cove on Prince Edward Island three years ago. I thought I hit the ball too well and it had gone flying over the green. I was shocked to see it in the cup.

[HarleyQuinn 0]

Won "Most Coachable" at the Red Auerbach basketball camp despite being mostly a cheerleader off the court and busting my ass on the court while we literally lost every game we played (Think a mini white boy's Allen Iverson with no dribbling skills but willing to pass and dive all over the place).

 

My single proudest moment of that camp was that I was leading a 3 on 2 charge. A guy behind me on the wing (I saw that he'd be behind me heading up court when I got the ball even though he was about 2-3 steps behind me) and a guy on the other wing while I'm on the right side of the free throw line. I swing it to the left winger, get the ball back inside the 3 point line at the opponents baseline, and literally hand the ball to the wing teammate behind me without even looking backwards with one singular motion of catching the ball. Guy missed but it subsequently went out of bounds and I walked back to my bench while my coach's eyes were bugging out of his head going, "What was that?!" in amazement.

 

You know the comment, eyes in the back of your head? That must've been what it looked like.

 

 

[2GOLD 0]

Was able to finish an entire baseball game after pulling my hamstring. I was already playing on two sprained ankles but since if I left with an injury we had to forfeit (only had nine available), I didn't tell anyone how badly I was hurt and finished the final 5 innings. Even got a two singles with three RBIs.

 

The coach jumping down my throat in the fifth for not legging out a double then finding out I had been playing injured since the second was cool though, his apology was priceless. Course our team sucked so bad that my hobbled ass had two of our five hits and we lost by 5.

 

Got a trophy for toughness at the end of the season. That was pretty sweet. We didn't win a game that year, I deserved something good after that effort. And yes, this is also one of the stupidest moments in my life. I still don't know why the hell I didn't just say, "screw this, we suck, I'm hurt. See ya."

[Fartsauce 0]

Well I won the award for most improved bowler in my 5-pin bowling league in 1997. The following year I was the bowler of the year. YAY.

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

I shot a hole-in-one on the eighth hole at Crowbush Cove on Prince Edward Island three years ago. I thought I hit the ball too well and it had gone flying over the green. I was shocked to see it in the cup.

 

I realize you're not gonna be a celebrity for it or anything, but that's not all mundane - estimated odds are one ace for every 31,000 golfers.

 

Incidentally, two hole-in-one stories involving my dad. When my brother stayed with him after he finished high school, they would often play this little executive course. The ninth hole was one of three or four Par 4's on the course. It usually played about 240 or 245, but the tees were about 180 this day. My dad knocked it in from the tee using a six-iron. There's this little golf newsletter that comes out weekly during the summer in Niagara, and it'll list local holes-in-one, club championship results, etc. You can usually tell the skill of the golfers on the page that lists holes-in-one, since it includes yardage and club selection. (Lots of Joe Smith, 97 yard, five iron, etc.) My dad was delighted by his ace, but laughed maniacally when the page listed "John Mullen, 245 yards, six iron".

 

Also, his best friend once made an ace at a tournament by flying it onto the green, have it bounce off the Closest To The Pin marker and into the cup. This was 2003 and they still argue over whether or not it should count.

[Guest Gym Class Fallout]

Back to high school gym: sure, I may've been completely worthless in basketball, but when it came to the floor hockey unit, I was the Bob Probert of second semester 7th hour freshman gym. Since we were in a gymnasium that was about four regulation basketball courts long, the teacher either couldn't see us all the way down there, or he would leave the room and completely leave us to our own devices. Generally, I'd just be more physical than my peers, and just hit people and stuff when I needed to, but one day, this annoying Chinese kid, you know, the kind that bleach their hair, was trying to trash talk, which I found silly, so I just tripped him with the stick and knocked him on his ass. I guess it looked incidental enough that he didn't try to fight me, but he was on the football team and likely on drugs, so he would've won that. Felt good, though.

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

I'm really not trying to outdo anyone with my what, five posts, here in the last hour.

 

Grade 12: Failed religion first semester, made it up the next. Also had a spare first semester, so when June rolls around, I have all my mandatory credits (four religion, two math), but still need one to graduate. Go into summer school and they tell me I can take either Grade 12 Calculus or Grade 10 Gym. Since the only year in high school I didn't take gym was ten, coupled with my overall mathematical stupidity, I chose the latter. So, I was already two years ahead of most of the class. I'm stoned my first day during the 'what's your name/grade/favourite thing', and couldn't remember my age, so I said 21. (I was actually 18 at the time). I instantly became known as Old Guy and was deemed to be by far the best athlete even before we actually did anything. To make it even better, there were a lot of middle-school kids fast tracking and getting credits out of the way before they got to high school. I was five or six years older than about a third of the class (even though one student had already been arrested for drugs). Played dodgeball the second day and it wasn't that different from Billy Madison. Played golf the third to last day and I hit my tee shot, a nine iron, about, oh 95-100 yards, which isn't very far at all for me. Still, I heard about 50 gasps and "WOW! DID YOU SEE THAT?".

 

Played ball hockey two weeks later with some of my buddies. Back down to earth.

[Maztinho 0]

I was the Mark Eaton of my Junior High gym class. They kept a tally of the schools block leaders, PPG, Assists and what not. We had three TA's and the teacher so there was usually only one game not being "scored" and they made sure everyone got an equal shot at "games that count" on the stats. Granted it was just random kids, but I averaged like 7 blocks a game vs 5 points per.

 

Also people thought my "Most Blocks In a Game" record was a typo at 23. Stupid kid kept driving the lane when I had a foot of height on him. I'd block it out, they'd pass it back to this dip shit, and he come in and I'd do the same thing. We were supposed to be playing man, but "my guy" was trying to be Dennis Rodman so he'd never leave the paint so I could play a roving zone without getting in trouble.

 

And the coach of the school team didn't think I had the skill to play on the team, even though 2/3 of the junior high team (Dennis included) was in my 7th grade gym class.

[Guest Smues]

I was never good at any sport because I'm a lazy lump, but in 6th grade on the last day of band we played a game of football. My team was up by a touchdown with time (the allocated band period) running out. The other lead, with the band director at QB was marching down the field towards the endzone pretty quickly. Before this play I heard one of the kids on the other team who hadn't touched the ball all game saying throw me the ball throw me the ball throw me the ball, so I figured I'd take on a chance on covering him that he might actually get thrown to. He did, I picked it off in the endzone, and we won. Boring sidenote: I ran it back out of the endzone probably 30-35 yards (we weren't on a painted field), but someone on the other team didn't know his football rules and said that because I caught it in the endzone it was a touchback and we had to go back to the 20. Despite sealing the game with that pick I was really mad for some reason about my awesome run coming back.

[CanadianChris 0]

I got my silver medal on the Canada Fitness Test in grade 5. I was one mark short, but we got to redo one of the tests, and I picked the chin-up bar. I managed to pull myself up for about two and a half minutes in front of the whole class.

[Guest]

In junior high, I won "Best Defensive Player" on the basketball team.

 

Also, I hit someone in freshman football, and caused them to break their arm. Yeah, that felt good.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

The only sports achievement I have was an unassited double play in my T-Ball league when I was like 6. It was amazing they even let me play T-Ball. I wasnt allowed to participate in Gym or any sports in school. I actually had to have approval of my health condition as a reason for not taking gym in school since it was a requirement to graduate in the state of Maryland.

 

 

 

 

[Smartly Pretty 0]

The other day I umpired my first little league game. I remember when I was in fourth grade and played little league I always used to ask my dad what the score is. fuck, I know why he never had an answer now. This one lady in the stands though (who didn't think I could hear her calling my little league walk-awarding skills into question) actually had a scorebook. How does one score the mercy rule, exactly? I also got to break up a fight between the pitcher and the second basemen because the pitcher took serious offense to the second basemen saying "shit!" after a home run.

[Guest Gym Class Fallout]

Heart conditions shouldn't prevent you from having mundane sports achievements, Marvin. Ever tried to throw pencils at acoustical tiles and see if they get stuck? (This game is called "ceiling darts.") Or get some really cool play in bocce ball where you knock somebody else's balls out of position with your own? That's what we're looking for in this exercise. 'sides, an unassisted double play isn't too bad.

[strummer 0]

Scoring 3 touchdowns in gym during a game of touch football.

 

One time in a pickup football game with a bunch of kids in the neighborhood I was rushing the QB, tipped the pass, intercepted the ball and ran it back for a TD.-----------------> Best One Ever

 

During a 5th Grade vs. 6th Grade baseball game ( I was in the 5th grade and we won) at school someone hit a line drive (we played with a tennis ball) right at 2nd, I short hopped it clean and threw the guy out at first

[KingPK 0]

I hit an inside the park grand slam in gym class once. Of course, there was no fence to speak of where we were playing and the slowest girl in the class had to field my drive, but it still counts in my book.

 

I also played a first base to make Kevin Youkilis proud in T-Ball.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

Heart conditions shouldn't prevent you from having mundane sports achievements, Marvin. Ever tried to throw pencils at acoustical tiles and see if they get stuck? (This game is called "ceiling darts.") Or get some really cool play in bocce ball where you knock somebody else's balls out of position with your own? That's what we're looking for in this exercise. 'sides, an unassisted double play isn't too bad.

 

Its kinda hard to have any sports achievement when you've never played any sports. The only other thing Ive done aside from T-ball was mini-golf and the only thing I can think of is I "got an eagle" (2 shots) on a par 4 hole because I hit the ball too hard and it bounced off a bunch of stuff up in the air, technically though I do believe there would be some sort of penalty assessed if we were actually serious about it.

[iggymcfly 0]

I'm stoned my first day during the 'what's your name/grade/favourite thing', and couldn't remember my age, so I said 21. (I was actually 18 at the time).

 

Did you really get this high just off of weed or were you on something else? Pretty funny story either way.

 

As for me, I guess I have a few high school stories. I was a pretty good defender/rebounder in freshman basketball and I could even shoot fairly decent in practice, but somehow I'd get performance anxiety or something in games and would take some really ugly shots. My playing time got cut to about 5 minutes a game and I didn't get the ball much even when I was in. I didn't score a point the first 12 games or something and going into the last game I probably had like 6 points total over 20+ games. Then, the last game we were playing some crappy team and so the coaches played me over half the game and actually made an effort to get me the ball so I scored 12 points. It's nothing too special, but it was kind of amusing to score twice my season total in the last game.

 

In football, I was better than I was in basketball, but still not very good. I played on the line on both sides of the ball, but played a lot more offense than defense in JV ball because that's where I was better. The second to last game of my junior season, someone gets hurt and I finally go in for the varsity in the second half. Then, the next Monday, I go to the JV game (almost all the underclassmen that didn't start both sides of the ball for the varsity would play JV because we had a small school) and in the 2nd quarter, I made a tackle on kickoff coverage and broke my hand. I actually finished out the game, just playing offense and blocking with my forearm instead of my hand as I didn't really believe it was broken. I made it through practice on Tuesday before realizing that I should get it checked out and finding out that yes, it was broken. So anyway, I ended up not playing although I did have a cast wrapped up and some pain-killer.

 

Then my senior year, we got all new coaches except for the defensive coordinator that had been there for 20 years. For some reason, the new coaches decided I sucked and never even attempted to play me on offense, even though I was definitely better than one of the guards we started most of the year. I played some on defense just because the coach who'd been around most of the year wanted to get me in. Then, I missed a game to go to my grandma's funeral (she lived with my mom and I and we were really close) and he pretty much stopped playing me too.

 

OK, I guess the last part was more like "mundane bitching about things that happened years ago" than a mundane achievement. It was supposed to be just "scored 12 points in a HS basketball game after averaging <1 PPG the whole season" and "finished a JV football game with a broken hand".

[Guest Vitamin X]

Not totally mundane, but I sacked and intercepted Kyle Boller back in high school.

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

Just weed, Iggy.

 

Someone post Al Bundy already.

[Maztinho 0]

The only rule in Mini-Golf is basking in the awesomeness of the game.

 

Not really an achievement, but does anyone else have "THE VOLCANO" hole in their local Putt Putts? This thing is the devil machine, and the geniuses at the local place put it next to the wandering river thing they have through the two outdoor courses. So I was getting frustrated with my 7 stroke lead on my friends evaporating on this hole, so I just said screw it, and popped one hard enough to send the ball into the water hazard. And then I got yelled at going into the water to retrieve my ball after they wouldn't give me another one.

 

Jerks and their stupid Volcano hole.

[Guest Gym Class Fallout]

Heart conditions shouldn't prevent you from having mundane sports achievements, Marvin. Ever tried to throw pencils at acoustical tiles and see if they get stuck? (This game is called "ceiling darts.") Or get some really cool play in bocce ball where you knock somebody else's balls out of position with your own? That's what we're looking for in this exercise. 'sides, an unassisted double play isn't too bad.

 

Its kinda hard to have any sports achievement when you've never played any sports. The only other thing Ive done aside from T-ball was mini-golf and the only thing I can think of is I "got an eagle" (2 shots) on a par 4 hole because I hit the ball too hard and it bounced off a bunch of stuff up in the air, technically though I do believe there would be some sort of penalty assessed if we were actually serious about it.

See, that's a good one, the mini-golf one. Miniature golf is arife with mundane sports achievements. The game is just tailor-made for quirky flukes that make you feel like you've actually accomplished something, in spite of the fact that you're just playing miniature freakin' golf.

 

Here's another one that better fits the exercise: my cat, Mr. Baby, likes to play with pretend mice and the safety-seals from milk jugs, in addition to other stuff. When he plays with them and loses them under the oven, he looks up at whoever's around as if to say "oh, great, now what do I do." So one day, I got out the yardstick to fish out the mouse he just lost. I kinda dug around under there, hit something, and slap-shot the fake mouse out from under the oven and all the way down the kitchen floor. Then, to see what else was under there, I probed further, and just kept slap-shooting things at my cat. I eventually found at least fifteen sundry cat toys, all which he was able to catch, play-kill, and drop into his food bowl. So it was sort of a person-cat toy hockey thing.

[MFer 0]

A few...

 

1. Scored the game-winner in a 8th grade b-ball game. A teammate missed a FT, I grabbed the rebound, and layed in it to break a tie with 5 seconds left.

 

2. RAN for a 1st down on 3rd & 31 to keep the game-tying drive alive during JV football. Of course the other team went on to drive right down the field afterwards and win the game.

 

3. Played every position at least once during one of my Little League seasons.

[BX 0]

Not totally mundane, but I sacked and intercepted Kyle Boller back in high school.

 

Wow, way to date yourself there, bud.

[NYU 0]

KingPK stole my mundane achievement. I was roughly around 10 and we were playing baseball in some kind of summer camp program. Since the point of this game was to include everyone in my portion of the camp which included around forty people, it'd be safe to say there would be twenty people playing in the outfield at any given moment. Well, I come up to bat. Bases are loaded. Hit a shot right through the gap into the outfield of the schoolyard. As the ball is rolling towards the chain-link fence, kids are colliding and stumbling over each other trying to get it. Finally, one does. And what does he do? Wild toss totally away from the diamond. Before I know it, inside-the-park grand slam homerun. Certainly one of my crowning sports achievements for now and forever.

[HarleyQuinn 0]

Some more...

 

1: Hit the game winning basket of a scrimmage practice after the ball deflected back to me at the free throw line at the Red Auerbach camp and knocked the tallest guy on our "level" of basketball out of a 1 on 1 tournament game by sinking four 3 pointers right in his face (not being able to dribble and penetrate killed me next game but meh). Surreal having other kids go crazy and slapping me on the back for knocking the dude out though.

 

2: I suck at baseball (little league and real...). In my 2 little league seasons I combined for many walks and strikeouts along with 1 hit and I only made contact with the ball twice in both years. My first contact I fouled the first pitch of my first at bat of the season straight back into the screen. My only hit came on the day I had to leave the game early to go the dentist. I smacked a line drive to center field for an RBI single, and reached second on the throw to home.

 

3: I made a good 60 yard TD catch off a screen pass in elementary school (This was 3rd graders vs. the big 5th graders) including hurdling a guy but I got called down by contact at about 10 yards short of the goal line by the guy I hurdled

 

4: At soccer camp I scored a goal after my teammate lost the ball (got injured on the play no less). Dribbled around a defender and nailed a dart to the far side of the goal post (right to left).