Murder

[Angel_Grace_Blue 0]

This is kind of a two-pronged thread, though I'm sure more prongs will be added.

 

Anyway, am I the only person that watches infomercials and thinks "Wow, I wonder how much a serial killer would benefit from that product?". Granted, a large portion of that might stem from me reading "The Serial Killer Encylcopedia" over the last few days (The index for individual killers is kinda lame since it includes mafia hitmen. Those guys are just doing a job. It's not like they are compelled to kill outside of money). Anyway, whenever I see an ad for a knife set that has a cleaver capable of chopping through a brick or something similar, I typically associate it with cutting humans into manageable chunks. Vacuum-sealed bags and super-powerful blenders (Like the ones in the "Will it Blend?" series) also seem well-suited to taking care of victim remains.

 

Second prong: Not that anybody on this messageboard would require the services, but what are the commonly discussed locations to dump a body in your area? Currently, it would probably be the Tuskegee National Forest, as it's often brought up as a place to not go camping. Back when I lived in Mississippi (Petal/Hattiesburg area), I suppose throwing a corpse in the Leaf River would be the easiest, though I think the MS River would have been better. As far as my childhood home of El Paso, Texas, Juarez was where people disappeared (Women, more accurately, as Ciudad Juarez gets its own entry in the serial killer book for missing ladies), so I guess just across the border if I needed to hide a body up until my tenth birthday.

 

Yaaaay killing folks!

[Youth N Asia 0]

I've always felt like I could get away with a well thought out killing

[Angel_Grace_Blue 0]

Kinda reminds me about a section in the serial killer encylopedia on how a good portion of serial killers arrive unprepared and have to make-do with weapons found around the victim. So, if you want to kill someone, remember to bring your tools and not rely on the victim to have a chisel, juicer, and waffle iron in a convenient location.

 

Also on the subjet of serial killer weapons - How crazy/dedicated/angry do you have to be to kill someone with a hammer? I know a good whack with a blunt object could end someone, but I imagine that it would just hurt like hell. Were I to snap, my laziness would require either a gun or some type of stabby/cuty device. Fuck trying to smash through someone's skull with a ballpeen for an hour straight.

[CheesalaIsGood 0]

I'd tell you all how I got away with snuffing out Jam Master J but don't you just feel BETTER knowing Ja Rule did it? You're welcome.

[CanadianGuitarist 0]

Doesn't dumping a body seem kind of careless or half-assed?

[Guest Tzar Lysergic]

I'd either eat or burn anyone I'd kill.

[Retard Girl 0]

i know of a great little chunk of forest up here, people are always dumping shit there... washers, lawn bags, stoves, general trash... how about a body or two? especially where there's a spot where the road is at the edge of a steep incline, with a nice swampy area at the bottom. this chunk of road hasn't been fixed/developed/etc for decades, because one town claims it belongs to the other town, and vice versa. so i can imagine if they found a body there.

 

"no, it's your town"

 

"nu-uh, your twon!"

[Boon 0]

Where are you talking? Towns around here have lots of land disputes.

 

Echo the "burn everything" sentiments. Also, hurray for living near the ocean.

[Retard Girl 0]

i dunno where you're from, but around here, it's a crowded area of the country, and there's no "land" in between towns. no "unincorperated county land" and of the like. which was one thing i was amazed when i visited out west. "how is there no town here? there has to be a town. what do you mean "county" land?"

 

i mean, we have counties, but they don't do much other than courts and voting shit.

 

but yeah, every place here is somewhere. there's not too many disputed areas.

[Golgo 13 0]

I wouldn't like to get my hands dirty. I'd have to use a gun. I would've said gentlemanly and deliberate, but many killers actually are. However, they're often raping or eating or mutilating or wearing the remains, which would be the difference. It seems the deliberate ones are exactly the type to maim. I'm not so sure I could have my fun or get a rush from it to the extent of those who indulge so much and are prone to that shit. It's why I'd be a decent hitman. Simply dumping a body would be the option.

 

I live in the middle of a fairly large city, though, so any activities would likely take too much planning, sneaking around and such to get done, arousing too much suspicion. I can't drop it in a waterway, everything here is too shallow. My best option would be to drive into the mountains, dump the body and let the animals there take care of it, or head to the plains and drop the body off in a field on a side road, but taking those frequent trips would be suspicious. That's if I'm doing things alone and kill away from the dump site. It'd involve more planning and struggle, but I'd be inclined to drugging, bounding and whisking my kill away to the dump site first, rather than mess with a bleeding corpse. If I have resources and the friends to help, though, let them do the dirty work and cut the body. I've always assumed stripping the meat away and feeding it to animals would be best, while the bones could be disposed of through some other method, maybe a caustic chemical, again, assuming I have the access. I've heard cutting the body and dumping the remains, meat, bones and all, into a pig trough is a good method, but that could be urban legend/from a movie I can't place. I assume pigs aren't fit to digest all that either.

 

Yes, it's too hard to kill someone, see it all the way through and actually get away with it here, much less make a career out of it. There's one option in a large city, actually, more people on the street that no one would notice or miss if they did go missing. There's still the problem of where to drop the body, and I don't believe the killers who target these people work within a large amount of time, preferring more to kill on the spot and leaving quickly.

 

Yeah, pipes, hammers, and other blunt instruments always seemed like crime of passion/heat of the moment weapons. No serial killer actually chooses to use that stuff unless they're really, really angry and want to cause as much pain as possible to the type they have a grudge against. There's no way those killers last very long. I'm guessing messy types who are just mad and inclined to blunt objects always get busted less than a few kills in.

[Failed Bridge 0]

I started a thread on serial killers a couple years back.

 

I think the junkyard I work at would be a great place to throw a body. There's like 3 security cameras that I know of and if anything I'd just throw the body into "The Pit" (that's the place where the cars are brought to have the gas tanks emptied and there's a giant furnace over there too. Just toss the body in there)

[Slayer 0]

every place here is somewhere.

oh, okay

[Jingus 0]

I actually found Taiga's description of the Northeast interesting, since I've never been to an entire section of the country which was like that. I've mostly lived in suburbs my whole life, but I've never been more than maybe an hour's drive from some sort of undeveloped wilderness. Even in the heart of downtown Atlanta it doesn't take overly long to get to some Deliverance backwoods.

 

the future People's Exhibit A

Man, you've put a lot of thought into this. That's creepy, dude.

 

Not that I'm trying to be critical of you... I'll just back away slowly here... please don't kill me

 

I'd just throw the body into "The Pit"

Really? Heh. Wacky.

[Slayer 0]

I was waiting for your guilty conscience to kick in

[Copper Feel 0]

I never realised that Slayer had an ironic appreciation for Man O War. I always presumed he'd consider them to be tedious and unfunny.

[Smartly Pretty 0]

If I were to murder somebody, I'd take a bunch of different people's hair from their combs and sprinkle them all over the crime scene.

[Guest Smues]

I live in Alaska, there's a zillion places I could dump a body without it getting found for a long long time. Hell, the fan man hung himself on a tree up here and no one found him for six months.

[Slayer 0]

I never realised that Slayer had an ironic appreciation for Man O War.

I don't do hipster irony

 

Uber-goofy "Metal is serious business" leather-clad image notwithstanding, they have several good songs, although they haven't done anything worthwhile since the early 90's

 

also, Manowar is one word

 

also also, real men play on ten

[Retard Girl 0]

i dunno where you're from, but around here, it's a crowded area of the country, and there's no "land" in between towns. no "unincorperated county land" and of the like. which was one thing i was amazed when i visited out west. "how is there no town here? there has to be a town. what do you mean "county" land?"

 

i mean, we have counties, but they don't do much other than courts and voting shit.

 

but yeah, every place here is somewhere. there's not too many disputed areas.

 

 

to further explain this point, i will quote this wikipedia article (because we all know how accurate the wiki is)

 

 

 

 

- Towns are laid out so that all land within the boundaries of a state is allocated to a town or other incorporated municipality. Except in some very sparsely populated areas of the three northern New England states (primarily in the interior of Maine), the concept of unincorporated territory, even in rural areas, is unknown. With the exception of those very sparsely populated areas, all land in New England is within the boundaries of a town or other incorporated municipality.

 

- While towns are typically centered around a built-up populated place with the same name as the town (a "town center"), they usually cover a larger area. Towns often encompass additional built-up places and/or a mixture of extraneous urban and rural territory. There is no unincorporated territory between the towns; leaving a town means entering another town or other municipality.

 

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_England_town

 

[PILLS! PILLS! PILLS! 0]

Echo the "burn everything" sentiments. Also, hurray for living near the ocean.

 

Whatever happened to the good ol' days of extirpating the flesh and selling the skeleton to the local pediatrician? You people are sick.

[Failed Bridge 0]

I brought this up with a couple co-workers last night at dinner and was told "Legally there are zero bodies up there and zero bodies found...legally" and that's all they would say.

[PLAGIARISM! 0]

I never realised that Slayer had an ironic appreciation for Man O War.

I don't do hipster irony

 

Uber-goofy "Metal is serious business" leather-clad image notwithstanding, they have several good songs, although they haven't done anything worthwhile since the early 90's

 

also, Manowar is one word

 

also also, real men play on ten

 

"If you're not into metal, you are not mah friend!"