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CanadianGuitarist

The Simpsons Week

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Coming off the heels of a Simpsons line I used in the hockey draft: Couple summers ago, The Comedy Network had a draw. The five winners were allowed to pick their seven favourite episodes of The Simpsons, and air them for a week.

 

Here's an episode guide.

 

Here's what I came up with, chronologically:

1) Homer at the Bat: Mr. Burns bets $1,000,000 that his company team can beat a competing plant's team. In order to do so, he replaced the regular company team with new security guard Roger Clemens, new janitor Wade Boggs, lunchroom cashier Ken Griffey Jr., and other new employees like Steve Sax, Don Mattingly, Ozzie Smith, Darryl Strawberry, Jose Canseco, and Mike Scoscia (who runs the solid contaminate encapsulator). Terry Cashman also guest stars.

2) The Otto Show: Otto loses his job driving the school bus, partially because he doesn't have a driver's license, and, after being kicked out of his apartment, goes to live with the Simpsons. Spinal Tap guest star.

3) Kamp Krusty: Bart and Lisa spend six weeks at Camp Krusty. However, the camp is not what it seems, as Bart and Lisa quickly find out.

4) Deep Space Homer: After seeing their ratings decline, NASA decides to send Joe Average to space. In this case, Joe Average is Homer Simpson. James Taylor, and Buzz Aldrin guest star.

5) The Joy of Sect: Along with the majority of Springfield, Homer and company are lured into the Movementarian cult by a slick pamphlet and tantalizing promises. But as Marge begins to realize that the cult only has money on its mind, she must try her hand at deprogramming to rescue her family.

6) A Tale of Two Springfields: After Springfield's telephone area code splits in two, Homer spearheads a movement to divide the town itself in half along the new area code line. Guest starring The Who.

7) How I Spent My Strummer Vacation: Homer is secretly videotaped complaining about his family while in cab (a la Taxi Cab Confessions). In an effort to help him regroup, Marge, Bart, Lisa and little Maggie send him to Mick Jagger's (playing himself) Rock 'N' Roll Fantasy camp. Once there, Homer lives the life of a rock star, taught to him by the likes of Sir Mick Jagger, Keith Richards, Lenny Kravitz, Elvis Costello, Tom Petty and Brian Setzer, all of whom guest star as themselves.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Here's my choices.

 

1) Homer at the Bat: Mr. Burns bets $1,000,000 that his company team can beat a competing plant's team. In order to do so, he replaced the regular company team with new security guard Roger Clemens, new janitor Wade Boggs, lunchroom cashier Ken Griffey Jr., and other new employees like Steve Sax, Don Mattingly, Ozzie Smith, Darryl Strawberry, Jose Canseco, and Mike Scoscia (who runs the solid contaminate encapsulator). Terry Cashman also guest stars.

 

2) Homer vs. the Eighteenth Amendment: When Prohibition hits the town of Springfield, and with Bart's help, Homer goes into the booze making business. Dave Thomas and Joe Mantegna guest star.

 

3) Homer, Bad Man: Homer's life comes crashing down on him when a simple grab for a candy treat is misinterpreted is sexual harassment by the family's new baby-sitter. Dennis Franz guest stars.

 

4) Homer the Great: Homer joins a secret sociality, where his greatness is revealed, but only after he destroys the secret parchment and stripped of his membership. Patrick Stewart guest stars.

 

5) You Only Move Twice: Homer moves the family to a new town after he receives a better job offer, at a better nuclear power plant, but Homer is oblivious to the fact that his new boss is a Super Villain who is out to rule the world.

 

6) The Springfield Files: Homer witnesses something out of this world in Springfield woods, but no one believes him, not even FBI agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully (from The X-Files), who came to investigate the incident. Gillian Anderson, David Duchovny and Leonard Nimoy guest star.

 

7) Simpson Tide: Bored as usual, Homer decides to take up a new career in the Navy, where he single-handedly cuts the ribbon on treason season by charting a submarine into soviet waters. Meanwhile, Bart gets his ear pierced. Guest starring Bob Denver, Rod Steiger as Captain Tenille, and Michael Carrington.

 

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"Hey buddy, did you get a load of the nerd?

 

".....pardon me?"

 

Best Episode EVAH. There are seriously probably more classic one-liners in that one then any other Simpsons episode. I'll debate that one with anybody willing to present an argument.

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"Hey buddy, did you get a load of the nerd?

 

".....pardon me?"

 

Best Episode EVAH. There are seriously probably more classic one-liners in that one then any other Simpsons episode. I'll debate that one with anybody willing to present an argument.

 

To that end, check out the NHL draft. The line I used was the very catalyst for this thread, which I'd wanted to do for a while but never got going.

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My picks:

 

1) Cape Feare - A parody of the film Cape Fear. Sideshow Bob is paroled and swears revenge on Bart. Just non-stop laughs from beginning to end. So many classic moments in this one; the rakes, Homer Thompson, the HMS Pinafore, The Bart The, etc.

2) Boy Scoutz N The Hood - Bart goes on a Squishee bender and winds up in the Junior Campers where he, Homer, Ned & Todd end up stranded in a raft in the middle of the ocean.

3) Homer at the Bat - Burns gets a bunch of MLB ringers to work at the plant so they can play in the region's softball championship.

4) You Only Move Twice - Homer gets a new job with supervillain Hank Scorpio and takes down his archnemesis James Bont.

5) Deep Space Homer - NASA hires Homer to go into space due to falling ratings. Two of my favourite guest stars show up in this episode in James Taylor & Buzz Aldrin.

6) Last Exit to Springfield - Homer becomes the head of the union and leads a strike at the plant.

7) Homer the Great - Homer becomes leader of a Freemason-esque secret society.

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1. $pringfield - Marge gets addicted to Gambling at Mr. Burns' Casino. Homer looks after the kids - contains the classic bit where Homer freaks out over the Boogeyman!

2. You Only Move Twice - James Bond parody totally awesome.

3. Beyond Blunderdome - Guest Star Mel Gibson... also starring Dog with Sinister Look.

4. Missionary: Impossible - Homer: (Running into the church) SANCTUARY! SANCTUARY! Rev. Lovejoy: (sighing) I wish I'd never taught him that word.

Homer: Missionary? But I don't even believe in Jeebus!

Homer: Save me, Jeebus!

5. Homer to the Max - Homer is surprised to find a TV Cop is called Homer Simpson 'uh oh spagetti ohs!'

6. Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo - The Simpsons go to Japan

7. This Little Wiggy - Anything with Ralph Wiggum is awesome!

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1) Avalanche ("We did it, all thanks to teamwork!", "Yeah *my* teamwork")

2) Itchy and Scratchy Land

3) Cape Feare

4) Lemon Tree

5) Homer Goes to College

6) Kamp Krusty

7) Lisa The Beauty Queen

 

I could watch all of the above a million times. Homer at Bat, Scorpio, and Stonecutters are all great eps too.

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1) Homer's Enemy - Finally, last week, Frank Grimes, the man who had to work for everything he ever got, earned his degree in nuclear physics by mail...with a minor in determination.

 

2) 22 Short Films About Springfield - The awesome Pulp Fiction parody episode following around several of the Springfield townspeople, including the really tall guy in the tiny little car that Nelson "haw-haw"s at.

 

3) Krusty's Klown Kollege - Homer and Krusty have to perform the "loopty loop" trick on the mini bike for the mafia don. A ton of classic scenes in this episode.

 

4) Homer's Phobia - Homer becomes friends with a gay man until he learns about his sexuality.

Barney: "Is it ok to come yet, Mr. Gay Man, sir?"

Moe: "I'll do anything you want. Anything!"

 

5) Homer at the Bat - Already covered, classic. "5 misfortunes? Possible. 7 misfortunes? Maybe. But 9 misfortunes? Impossible!"

 

6) Lisa the Vegetarian - Such an awesome episode, but especially because I constantly reference lines from it to my own vegetarian sister.

 

7) Christmas themed tie: Bart steals Bonestorm / Bart burns down the Christmas tree - My favorite time of year + my favorite show = my favorite holiday themed TV episodes of all time.

 

 

I left off "You Only Move Twice," another one of my all time favorites, since it's been mentioned so many times already. I'll also give an honorable mention to "Who Shot Mr. Burns, Part 1+2." Seasons 6, 7 and 8 are, in my opinion, the absolute best of the series.

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1- "Flaming Moe's" - When Moe's Tavern suffers financially, Homer tells Moe Szyslak of a secret alcoholic cocktail made with cough syrup and fire he calls "Flaming Homer". Though when Moe tries Homer's recipe in the bar and finds out it boosts his business and patronage, Moe steals the recipe from Homer. Guest stars: Aerosmith. "Uh, I'm Hugh Jass."

 

2- "Homer the Heretic" - While skipping Sunday's church services, Homer discovers the joy of staying home and having the house all to himself while Marge and the kids experience a rambling sermon from Reverend Lovejoy. Homer decides to start his very own religion customized for himself. First appearance of God. "Dad! The heathen's getting away!" "I see him, son..."

 

3- "Marge v. the Monorail" - After Mr. Burns is caught storing his excess nuclear waste inside Springfield Park's trees, he is ordered to pay the town $3 million. The town is originally set to agree to fix Main Street, but the charismatic Lyle Lanley interrupts and convinces the town to use the money to buy one of his monorails. "Hello, my name is Mr. uh...Snrub. Yes, that will do." "Actual institute may not match photo" "Does whiskey count as beer?" "Do you want to change your name to Homer Junior? The kids could call you Ho-Ju!" "I call the big one Bitey."

 

4- "Rosebud" - After a disastrous birthday party, Mr. Burns pines for his long-lost childhood toy, a teddy bear named Bobo. The bear ends up in the hands of Maggie and when Homer discovers this, he tries to use the bear to get a large reward from Burns. "Homer, did you stay up all night eating cheese?" "I think I'm blind."

 

5- "Homer Bad Man" - Homer and Marge attend a candy convention, where Homer successfully steals a gummy Venus de Milo. Later, after Homer takes the children's babysitter Ashley Grant home, he notices that the gummy Venus has become stuck to her pants and grabs it, an action that Ashley misinterprets as a sexual advance. "No Mr. Simpson, don't take your anger out on me! MR. SIMPSON!!! NNNOOOOO!!!" "Dramatization. May not have happened."

 

6- "A Milhouse Divided" - Kirk and Luann Van Houten's marriage is in trouble and at a dinner party at the Simpson house Luann announces that she wants a divorce. Homer is confident that it will never happen to him, but Kirk tells him how quickly things can change. I won't even list the great lines from this episode, but it's safe to say that this may be my favorite episode of all time.

 

7- "Homer's Enemy" - Frank Grimes, a new employee at the Nuclear Power Plant, is a hard-working man who has never been given a break in his life. At work he meets Homer and takes an instant dislike to his poor job performance and attitude. "Heya Stretch. What's the good word?" "You're a fraud, a total fraud [leaves, then briefly comes back through the front door, turning to the rest of the family] It was nice meeting you."

 

I left off great episodes but I think this would be my week.

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In no particular order...

 

1. Homer At The Bat

2. You Only Move Twice

3. Lisa's Wedding

4. Saturdays Of Thunder

5. Flaming Moe's

6. Dead Putting Society

7. Trilogy Of Error

 

 

"Linguo....dead?" "Linguo...IS...dead."

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You guys suck. You missed the best episode.

 

The Last Temptation of Homer: Homer falls in love with a new female employee at the nuclear plant who is just like Homer. Homer, however, feels guilty.

 

"Hey Joey Joe Joe!"

 

"I'll just push the button for the stimulator, I mean elevator!"

 

"Murphy, you are an elf"

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"I am tired of these jokes about my giant hand, the first such incident occurred in 1968 when....."

 

"Free shower curtain"

 

" That raccoon stole my lamb chop"

 

Good call luke-o, great episode.

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aye, but with only 7 picks there's gonna be alot of great ones missed.

 

1.Last Exit to Springfield - Who is it?

Goons.

Who?

Hired goons.

Hired goons?

2.$pringfield (or, How I learned to stop worrying and love legalized gambling)

3.Homer: Bad Man

4.Homer the Smithers

5.Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala(Annoyed Grunt)cious

6.Homer vs. the Eighteenth Amendment

7.The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson

 

man that was tough, coulda done a list of 50 eps and I still woulda missed some great ones, heh

 

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Big ups to those that mentioned "Last Exit to Springfield."

 

Come gather 'round, children, it's high time, ye learned!

'Bout a hero, named Homer, and a devil, named Burns

We'll march 'till we drop, the girls and the fellas

We'll fight to the death or else fold like umbrellas

'Cause we'll march day and night, by the big cooling towers

They have the plant, but we have, the power!

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I think Season Seven is my favorite. Not a bad episode in the bunch and at least five or six legitmate classic episodes. After this season, the show began its very slow descent into mehness for me.

 

 

Here's my list (also in chronological order)

 

1. "A Streetcar Named Marge": As a fan of The Simpsons and A Streetcar Named Desire. This episode truly is the best of both world. The pretentious community theater director, Llewelyn Sinclair is probably my favorite of Jon Lovitz's numerous Simpsons guest star roles.

 

Llewelyn: I'm not an easy man to work with. While directing Hats Off to Chanukkah, I reduced more than one cast member to tears. Did I expect too much from fourth graders? The review 'Play Enjoyed By Alll' (holds up elementary school newspaper) speaks for itself.

 

2. "Treehouse of Horror III": Got to have some Treehouse of Horror on here and this is my all time favorite. Probably one of my personal most watched Simpsons episodes. All three stories are classic and work well all year round.

 

Shop owner: Take this object, but beware, it carries a terrible curse

 

Homer: Oooh, that's bad.

 

Shop Owner: But it comes with a free Frogurt!

 

Homer: That's good!

 

Shop Owner: The Frogurt is also cursed.

 

Homer: That's bad.

 

Shop Owner: But you get your choice of topping!

 

Homer: That's good!

 

Shop Owner: The topping contains Potassium Benzoate

 

(Homer stares blankly)

 

Shop Owner: That's bad.

 

Homer: Can I go now?

 

3. "Homer Goes To College": Classic.

 

4. "Deep Space Homer": Most of the later Simpson gimmick episodes fell flat on their face but this one worked way better than it should have.

 

Kent Brockman:Ladies and gentlemen, uh, we've just lost the picture, but what we've seen speaks for itself. The Corvair spacecraft has apparently been taken over - 'conquered,' if you will - by a master race of giant space ants. It's difficult to tell from this vantage point whether they will consume the captive Earthmen or merely enslave them. One thing is for certain: there is no stopping them; the ants will soon be here. And I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords. I'd like to remind them that as a trusted TV personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves.

 

5. 22 Short Films About Springfield": Another gimmick episode that worked incredibly well. It's astonishing to have a thirty minute show with so many interwining stories that all work.

 

Hospital Chairman: Dr. Nick, this malpractice committee has received a few complaints against you. Of the 160 gravest charges, the most troubling are performing major operations with a knife and fork from a seafood restaurant.

 

Dr. Nick: But I cleaned them with my napkin!

 

6. "Homerpalooza": This episode is kind of outdated but for any child of the 90s, this has to be up there with the all time best episodes.

 

Homer: Die? Well you don't scare me, doc. Cause dying would be a stone groove. Got any messages for Jimi Hendrix?

 

Doctor: Yes. Pick up your puppy. (points to old hound dog named Rover Hendrix)

 

7: "A Millhouse Divivded": Showcases a more serious side to The Simpsons and one of the better secondary characters, Millhouse Van Housen.

 

Band Leader: Who here likes The Doobie Brothers? Because we got one of 'em!

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Tom Brokaw was fuckin great in Homer In Space.

 

"Just imagine the logistics of such exploration. It could have millions of applications here on earth, everything from watchmaking to watch repair"

"They're a colourful bunch, they've been dubbed the three musketeers" "And we laugh legitimately. There's a mathematician, a different kind of mathematician, and a statistician."

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Marge vs The Monorail is one of my personal favourites.

 

Marge: Homer, I've got someone here to help you

Homer: Batman?

Marge: No, he's a scientist

Homer: Batman's a scientist

Marge: It's not Batman!

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I second whoever said season 3 is the best season. My top 7:

 

1. Lisa The Greek - So many great quips about the NFL and one of the best 'Homer/Lisa' episodes.

 

2. Homer's Enemy - Frank Grimes is legendary. Simple as that. Plus, probably the darkest Simpsons episode.

 

3. You Only Move Twice - Reasons have already been mentioned.

 

4. Beyond Blunderdome - Gibson is hilarious and the remake of the Mr. Smith Goes to Washginton is brilliant. "Did Braveheart run away?! Huh? Did Payback run away?!!?"

 

5. Lisa's Wedding - "England huh? Well, we saved your ass in World War 2!" "And we saved your ass in World War 3!" "True." Very underrated episode. By far the best one of their 'future' gimmick episodes.

 

6. 22 Short Films About Springfield - Reasons have already been mentioned.

 

7. Stark Raving Dad - Michael Jackson is one of my all-time favorite guest stars and this episode has some of the funniest gags of the series. "Which one of us is truly crazy?" "Not me! I got a certificate!" Also great is the Chief from One Flew Over a Cuckoo's Nest.

Doctor - "This is Chief. He hasn't said a word in years."

Homer - "Hi."

Chief - "Hello"

Doctors rush over in shock.

Chief - "well it's about time someone reached out to me."

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Did you guys know EL BRUJO and I text each other Simpsons quotes every single day? Today's selection:

 

Me: "Mr. Burns, did you honestly think I'd mistake the towns most prominent 104 year old man with one of my elementary school students?"

 

Him: "I'll kill dat Mr. Burns! And, uh, wound dat Mr. Smithers."

 

Yesterday:

 

Me: "I wonder if this Homer Nixon is any relation." "Unlikely sir. They spell and pronounce their names differently."

 

Him: "But Marge, valets! Maybe for once someone will call me sir, without adding 'You're making a scene.'"

 

My favorite season is four or five.

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