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5/14: Dirty Movies, Stinky Kitties

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kkktookmybabyaway

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9:15 p.m.

 

• I’m sure there are a few things being left out of this story, but for now I’ll say go ahead and sue. Look, it’s rated R and the kid is 12. She wouldn’t be allowed to watch this film by herself in the theaters, so at the very least her parents/guardians should have been alerted ahead of time by the government school that this film was going to be shown.

 

A girl and her grandparents have sued the Chicago Board of Education, alleging that a teacher showed the R-rated film Brokeback Mountain in class.

 

The lawsuit claims that Jessica Turner, 12, suffered psychological distress after viewing the movie, which stars Australian Heath Ledger, in her class at Ashburn Community Elementary School last year.

 

The film, which won three Oscars, depicts two cowboys who conceal their homosexual affair.

 

Turner and her grandparents, Kenneth and LaVerne Richardson, are seeking around $US500,000 ($A600,000) in damages.

 

"It is very important to me that my children not be exposed to this," said Kenneth Richardson, Turner's guardian.

 

"The teacher knew she was not supposed to do this."

 

According to the lawsuit filed on Friday in Cook County Circuit Court, the video was shown without permission from the students' parents and guardians. Richardson had previously complained to school officials about reading material he said contained curse words.

 

"This was the last straw," he said. "I feel the lawsuit was necessary because of the warning I had already given them on the literature they were giving out to children to read."

 

Like I said above, I’m sure there is something being left out: they only saw some snippet of the movie that had no indication of which cowboy was pitching and which one was catching. Now that I think about it, my one horticulture teacher in high school played a few R-rated movies, but we were all 15-17 years of age, not 12. Actually, we had one black/Indian/whatever kid in our class who was a star on our basketball team, and there was a film playing where some kid gets stranded in the jungle and was being raised by monkeys. When there was a scene with several chips screaming, some kid (and no it wasn’t me) said to this kid “there’s your mom.” Ah, juvenile humor. Shit, who am I kidding, I’d laugh at that now. When I was a freshman in high school we had some Iranian-or-close-enough kid who got razzed by one of his friends in class during the first Gulf War when he was asked if his house got bombed last night. Where was I going with this? Oh, yeah. R-rated movies. Our high school (or was it middle school? Christ I can’t remember) played “The Goonies” as a pre-Christmas break assembly one year, and some parent got pissed off because it was “inappropriate.” Not sure what became of it, but we didn’t watch one of those “American Tale” movies the next year, which was the big rumor. I remember a few times as a kid when “Ghostbusters” was played, much to the chagrin of some parents. Wow, and to think back then the line, “This guy has no dick” was big shit.

 

• And speaking of R-rated movies, I HATED carding people at the theater, although it was amusing to ask a group of teens for a driver’s license and none of them would have one available, which was odd because someone had to drive them. I never really got a good response to this question. I didn’t really care if some 16-year old wanted to see “Scream” without mom or dad with him, but my Nazi managers would, so I had to do what I did to keep from getting nagged out. Besides, it’s not that hard to buy a PG-13 ticket and then slip into the R-rated film minutes later. Now where am I going with this? Who know, who cares.

 

• So JJ had to get a bath yesterday. I don’t know why the better half insists on washing him, because after a day or so he stinks again. There’s nothing you can do about it – that’s how he was made and that’s how he will be. But no, we humans try to defy nature. Well, yesterday JJ for some reason trotted into the bathroom right as Mrs. kkk was getting the shampoo and towels out. This gave us the chance to isolate him in the bathroom rather than chasing him all over the house. The second the door closed he knew the jig was up and began crying at the top of his lungs. Jesus Christ. He then began scurrying around the bathroom, like that would help. Once there was some water in the tub it was time for JJ to take his dip.

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I remember when I was in 5th grade there was this big scandle because some teacher at some school nearby showed the 5th grade kids Mrs. Doubtfire, infuriating some parent and, I think, getting the teacher fired. At least showing an R movie to 12 year olds makes some sense that parents might get upset.

 

Oh and I also remember Junior year of highschool near the end of the year in English class we got to choose what movie to watch someday. The choices were two disney movies I forget, or Shawshank Redemption. We voted Shawshank. The teacher grabs the box, and is amazed to see that it's rated R. "Wierd I didn't remember it being rated-R" which means he'd probably only watched it on TNT or something since I always thought of it as a very R movie. So he freaks out and tries to put in one of the disney movies but we whined until he stuck with Shawshank. No one complained and we all enjoyed the movie, but it was hilarious watching our teacher freak out the whole time worried he was going to get fired.

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I can remember my social studies/history teacher showed us the Untouchables and Glory...both pretty violent (at least at the time) R movies. No one bitched and moaned.

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In 9th grade, after reading Romeo & Juliet, our teacher announced that we were going to watch one of the film versions of it. This kid that sat in the back of the room, Sam, excitedly blurted out loud, "Is it the one that Juliet show her tits in?"

 

The teacher looked at him with a shocked expression for a moment and then said quietly, "No, Sam, it's not" while the rest of us laughed our asses off.

 

Then senior year, my AP Gov't teacher warned us that the movie we were going to watch had a lot "adult content" in it and reminded us that we needed to "conduct ourselves in a mature manner" or else she'd stop the film and we could go back to lecture. The movie? The American President.

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In 9th grade, after reading Romeo & Juliet, our teacher announced that we were going to watch one of the film versions of it. This kid that sat in the back of the room, Sam, excitedly blurted out loud, "Is it the one that Juliet show her tits in?"

Oh man. I remember WANTING to see that one. But no, every other English class watched Juliet's tits, but the Leonardo dicraprio version had just come out on VHS so my teacher got that and made us watch that garbage. Ugg.

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We watched the full, unedited version of Romeo and Juliette. I forget what grade it was, it might have been freshman or sophomore year of HS.

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