Ed Wood Caulfield

Again, you can throw in John "Rock Hard" Brickston, he hasn't been seen in almost a year.

-2 OUT OF 3 FALLS MATCH FOR THE HI-YAH WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican and Stephen Joseph Popick (Champions) vs. Colombian Heat and Spanish Fly (Challengers) -P.R./Popick segment x2 -Heat/Fly segment x2

I've edited in a segment between Colombian Heat and Stacey Robertson, which explains what I was talking about later on in the Heat/VX match. Hopefully, it'll make things clearer now. I've read some of the show, and from the looks of things, it's another keeper!

Would Felix Strutter be okay? I'll set up the brackets by the end of the month.

Sweet.

I've got some brackets in mind. We're still short one man.

Place these segments towards the end of the show. Please. The camera cuts to the HeldDOWN~! interview set where Josh "J. Math" Matthews is standing by with Vitamin X, who is busy doing the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle. Prince Vitamin is in his wrestling attire, ready for his match. X shadowboxes a little bit. The crowd boos loudly. JOSH MATTHEWS Vitamin X, you are just moments away from your match against Colombian Heat, a rematch from AngleMania V last year. What are your thoughts heading into this match, one week after you stole Colombian Heat's girlfriend, Stacey Robertson, away from him? VITAMIN X Josh Matthews, I've only got one thing to say about Colombian Heat: he's got NO CHANCE IN HELL! VX walks away from the interview set, bumping into "J. Math's" left shoulder along the way. Josh Matthews stands there puzzled, watching X go by. The crowd boos loudly again. COLE Heat/X next! [b]Commercial break[/b] *KA-CHING~!* *Come and take your Vitamin X.* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" "Bling-Bling" by The B.G. featuring The Big Tymers and Hot Boys starts playing, which causes the crowd to stand up and start booing. The entrance doors slide open, and Vitamin X Shane-O-Mac Shuffles his way out onto the entrance stage, cocky like usual. X then raises his hands, trying to get the crowd fired up, but it's not working. Dollar signs are superimposed over the entrance ramp VX starts jogging down to the ring, bobbing his head to the beat of his entrance song. X is wearing his Colombian HACK yellow soccer jersey that he debuted last year, and just to refresh your memory, here it is: [IMG=http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v82/papacita/OAOAST/cohack.jpg] Lovely, isn't it? *DING DING DING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall with a thirty-minute TV time limit. Introducing first, coming to the ring at this time. From Miami, Florida. Weighing in at 248 lbs. He is the Financial Consultant for The Lightning Crew. He...is...VITAMINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN EXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX! X jaws with the fans at ringside, and then climbs the ring steps, hopping onto a turnbuckle. COLE So much emotion invested into this match! We are just one week removed from Stacey Robertson-- COACH That's PRINCESS STACEY to you, bub! COLE Sorry, "PRINCESS" Stacey joining The Lightning Crew and breaking up with Colombian Heat. And now tonight on HeldDOWN~!, Colombian Heat can get some revenge when he takes on Stacey's NEW boyfriend in a one-on-one match! COACH This isn't going to be much of a match, you know that? Heat is such a puss, he's probably still crying about Stacey breaking up with him! COLE He didn't seem to be crying earlier when he told her off in the middle of the ring! COACH That was a facade. You think all those gangstas you see on MTV wouldn't start peeing in their pants if they were looking down the barrel of a gun? Heat's the same way. He's faking it. He was frontin'. Heat really misses her, and he's not going to be able to concentrate on this match! COLE Well, we shall see. COACH We will! Vitamin X scans the crowd, and then crosses his arms into a X. X hops into the ring and does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle once again, pointing to his jersey. COLE Stacey isn't with Vitamin X right now. COACH That's because X wants Stacey to stay far away from Heat, lest she get hit in the head again! COLE Coach, that was an ACCIDENT! Heat never meant to do that! COACH Oh come on Cole! You were there! Heat INTENTIONALLY hit Stacey, knocking the Princess out cold! COLE You gotta be kidding me! It was all an accident! Stacey's just become deluded since joining The Lightning Crew! COACH No! She's realized the truth! Finally! Vitamin X continues doing the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle. He then stops and looks at the entrance, with a smirk on his face. "Bling-Bling" by The B.G. featuring The Big Tymers and Hot Boys dies down. The crowd buzzes in anticipation of Heat's entrance. COLE This crowd electric for the arrival of Colombian Heat. COACH Idiocy knows no border lines. COLE Coach, that's rude. COACH That's how I roll! I'm like the wind, baby! COLE Oh come on! A piano plays a melody causing the crowd to cheer loudly. The lights go down in the arena, turning back on in tune with the melody. *COME ON!* *BOOM~!* Pyro explodes, leaving behind fire that burns on both sides of the entrance stage. "Gasolina (Remix)" by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil' Jon and Pitbull starts playing. The crowd's cheers get even louder as the entrance doors slide open and Colombian Heat comes out, fired up and ready to go! "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COACH Ha! He's still crying! COLE Coach, stop it! Heat raises his hands, acknowledging his fans. He then points right at Vitamin X, saying something most likely vicious to him. X just stands there with his game face on. Colombian Heat points to both sides of the arena, and then walks down the entrance ramp, slapping hands with the fans along the way. BUFFER And his opponent! Coming to the ring at this time. Originally from Bogotá, Colombia, but now residing in Miami, Florida. Weighing in at 180 lbs. This...is...COLOMBIANNNNNNNNNNNNNNN HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT! Colombian Heat continues slapping hands with the fans as "Gasolina (Remix)" continues playing. COLE A rematch from AngleMania V last April. Heat defeated X in the first match on the show, but that was almost a year ago. And as you saw last week, anything can happen in a year, and now times have changed for both Vitamin X AND Colombian Heat! COACH Heat was in the zone at AngleMania V, I'll give him that. But he's no longer all there. The lost of his girlfriend to Vitamin X has permanently cripple him, emotionally. He'll never be able to recover from this, so he might as well retire from the sport. I wouldn't miss him. COLE You wouldn't. But fans all over the world would! Heat was dealt a crushing blow last week, but he CAN recover, and he WILL survive it! And he'll prove it starting tonight, and then next week when he and Spanish Fly take on PRL and Popick in a 2 Out Of 3 Falls Match for the HI-YAH World Tag Team Titles! COACH Heh, the way things are going, he might not even make it to next week! COLE I sure hope you're wrong about that. COACH I'm never wrong. I'm Da Coach! Heat high fives a young fan, and then climbs the ring steps to hop into the ring. He gets on the second rope and does the "WESTSIIIIIIIDE" hand signal, receiving cheers. Heat then gets on a second turnbuckle--BUT GETS ATTACKED BY VITAMIN X! COLE HEY! Vitamin X pummels Heat with lefts and rights even as Heat's music continues playing! The punches cause Heat to stumble around the ring. Vitamin X sends Colombian Heat to the ropes, and then starts punching him in the face repeatedly. COACH X is drawing first blood! I love it! The punches stun the Colombian superstar. So, VX takes a few steps back...charges forward...AND GETS BACKDROPPED OVER THE TOP ROPE ONTO THE FLOOR! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COACH OH NO! COLE Vitamin X is laying on the outside! Indeed, The X-Man is kissing the floor. Colombian Heat then asks for a microphone. COACH Somebody check on X! COLE Why don't you go do it!? COACH I can't! I'm announcing! "Gasolina (Remix)" by Daddy Yankee featuring Lil' Jon and Pitbull dies down. Heat has a microphone in his right hand and is pacing back and forth. COLOMBIAN HEAT Yo! Yo! Yo! If all of y'all are ready to see me make DAT BITCH feel the Heat, then Melbourne, Australia, make some noise UP IN THIS-- "BI-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH~!" Colombian Heat throws the microphone away, just as Vitamin X enters the ring charging like a bull! But Colombian Heat ducks the charge, and punches Vitamin X! He then does it again! And again! Colombian Heat DANCES~! And then knocks Vitamin X to the mat with the fourth punch to complete the Shake, Rattle, & Roll! COLE Shake, Rattle, & Roll from Colombian Heat! COACH AAAHHH! Heat drags Vitamin X over to the center of the ring. Heat bounces off the ropes, does a SHIMMY~!, and then drops a knee onto X's face! COLE Shaky Leg Knee Drop! Heat then gets on his knees, grabs X by his hair, and starts punching him in the face repeatedly with he crowd cheering louder every punch! COLE All that rage! All that anger! It's all coming out right now in the ring! Colombian Heat slams the back of Vitamin X's head against the mat several times. And it's at this point, that referee Mickey Jay finally calls for the bell. *DING DING DING* [b]COLOMBIAN HEAT vs. VITAMIN X[/b] Heat stomps on Vitamin X for a few minutes, taking breaks just to yell at him. Heat picks VX up by his hair and jersey, and then gives him an Irish whip sending him into the ropes. Heat follows that up with a leg lariat which sends Vitamin X flying through the second and third ropes onto the floor! COLE And Vitamin X is down for the second time in this match! COACH Come on! He needs a breather! Somebody check on him! SOMEBODY CHECK ON HIM! COLE Relax Coach. Calm down, here have a cookie. COACH Ooh! Cookie! As Coach thoroughly enjoys his cookie, Colombian Heat takes a minute to catch his breath and then exits to the ring to loud cheers. Vitamin X is lying flat on his back outside the ring, wincing in pain. Heat stomps on X's gut, just because he can, and then goes to pick him up. BUT THEN, Cuban Wall shows up and attacks Heat from behind! COLE Hey! Wait a minute! Come on now! This isn't right! COACH (mouth full of cookie) Hhey--it--he's--just--helpinghisfriend. Nothing--wrong--with--that. COLE What you say? COACH Nevermind. Cuban Wall laughs as he watches Colombian Heat try to get up. Heat does a soccer-style kick to Heat's stomach! As Vitamin X starts to get up, Cuban Wall picks Colombian Heat up by his orange basketball shorts and nails him with several punches to the temple! Wall then grabs Heat by his head and then throws him into the ring post, left shoulder first! COLE Oh! What a sickening thud! Heat hit the steel post HARD! Heat rests on the ring post, but Wall's not done with him yet. Wall pulls Heat off the ring post and then walks with him a few steps back. CW then hooks Heat up and lifts him up, like he's about to give him a back suplex. Instead, Cuban Wall charges forward...AND THROWS COLOMBIAN HEAT BALLS-FIRST INTO THE RING POST! CROWD OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! COACH A HA HA HA! A HA HA HA HA! A HA HA HA HA HA! A HA HA HA HA HA HA! COLE My God! The Brawn of Brains & Brawn is certainly living up to his name! COACH That was great! Can we see that again!? The OAOAST Starbucks Double Shot(TM) Instant Replay shows Cuban Wall throwing Colombian Heat into the ring post from different angles. Meanwhile, Colombian Heat is in horrible pain, grabbing his sack while still hanging by the ring post! COACH I don't think we'll be seeing any little Heats after THAT move! COLE You maybe right. Colombian Heat is in a bad way right about now! COACH Now, X can finish it! Come on X! Come on! Get back into the ring! Finish this match! The crowd is still reeling from that painful ballshot. Cuban Wall pulls Colombian Heat off the ring post and throws him back into the ring, where Heat continues grabbing his johnson. Wall then picks Vitamin X up by his jersey and also throws him back into the ring, but since X hasn't had his special area attacked by steel in the past five minutes, X is getting up while Heat continues lying in pain on the mat. COLE And now The X-Man has the advantage. He can do whatever he wants to Heat. This match is *his* for the taking! COACH Go get 'im, X! Take him out! Now! "P.R. SUCKS!" "P.R. SUCKS!" "P.R. SUCKS!" "P.R. SUCKS!" As another chant about PR sucking starts up, Vitamin X gets to his feet and stomps on Colombian Heat with his brand new white Reebok sneakers. He then starts dropping elbows onto Heat's back and chest! Cuban Wall taunts some fans at ringside as he watches X go to work on Heat. COLE And Colombian Heat is in trouble now! Vitamin X taunts Heat, and then picks him up. Snap suplex! X goes for the cover. 1... 2... HEAT KICKS OUT! X goes back to pummeling Heat with rights and lefts. The X-Man picks Colombian Heat up and whips him into the ropes--Heat reverses--Heat goes for a clothesline, X ducks, wraps himself around Heat's body...and hits him with a Floatover DDT! COACH Beautiful! Beautiful! Cuban Wall also applauds this move! X goes for the cover again. It gets two. "LET’S GO HEAT!" "LET’S GO HEAT!" "LET’S GO HEAT!" "LET’S GO HEAT!" The crowd tries their best to rally Heat back, but X is still on offense. Vitamin X picks Heat up by his head and then taunts him some more! He then goes back-to-back with Heat...and gives him a stalling neckbreaker! Vitamin X gets right back up and picks Colombian Heat up again. He starts jukin' and jivin' which causes the fans to start booing again. COACH Oh yeah. He's feeling it. He's feeling it. VX does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle, and then punches Colombian Heat. He punches him again! X does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle one more time, and then punches Colombian Heat a third time, knocking him down to the mat! COACH Yeah! The Shane-O-Mac Shuffle! X is beating the snot out of Colombian HACK! BOO-YAH~! VITAMIN X BOO-YAH~! COACH It's like he read my mind! Vitamin X poses for the fans, garnering more boos in the process. Prince Vitamin picks Heat up once more. *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" *CHOP!* "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" X shoves CH into a turnbuckle with Cuban Wall cheering him on. Heat is starting to feel fatigued. X knees Heat in the stomach several times, and then starts hitting Heat with fast kicks all over his body, yelling, "COME ON!" at the same time! Knife-edged chop across the chest! Vitamin X whips Colombian Heat--NO!--Heat reverses. X hits the turnbuckle! Heat then unleashes a combination of chops and punches all over Vitamin X! COACH WHAT!? NO! The crowd comes to life again. Colombian Heat then unleashes a flurry of martial arts kicks all over Vitamin X's body! Heat gets X stunned, and then finishes it off with a jumping back kick to X's jaw! X slumps all the way to the mat with his head resting on the bottom turnbuckle pad. COLE Oh boy! It could be time! COACH Oh no. Colombian Heat sees the crowd and smiles. He also sees Vitamin X lying in perfect position. So, Colombian Heat jogs on over to the opposite turnbuckle, does the low-rider hand gesture, and then charges forward. COLE Here it comes! Ride 'em cowboy! COACH Gay~! BRONCOBUSTER~! COLE Broncobuster! Broncobuster on Vitamin X! COACH Awww! He's stealing Vitamin X's move! COLE Let's not start that again! Colombian Heat gets off of X (ewwww), and then taunts him, before pulling him up by his jersey. Heat says something to him, and then whips him across the ropes--NO!--Heat holds on for a short armed clothesline! Short-armed clothesline! Another clothesline! Another clothesline! And yet, another clothesline! COLE Colombian Heat is making the comeback! CH grabs Vitamin X just as he gets up. BONG HIT~! COLE The Bong Hit! And Vitamin X...is...down! Colombian Heat exits the ring and climbs the turnbuckles. The crowd is getting hot. Vitamin X is slowly getting up. COLE Look out, X! Heat is going to fly! COACH Move! MOVE! MOOOVVEEEE! Colombian Heat is hunched over on the top rope. He mutters something to Vitamin X. Vitamin X is on his right knee. He pushes himself up onto his feet, despite feeling dazed and confused. X's eyes are glazed over as he stumbles around the ring... RIGHT INTO A MISSILE DROPKICK FROM COLOMBIAN HEAT!!! COLE Picture perfect missile dropkick from Heat! Colombian Heat sits up and looks at his right hand. "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE Oh yeah! He's feeling it! He's fired up! He's ready! Colombian Heat seems mesmerized by his right hand. He starts shaking, and soon his head shakes like he's having a seizure. COACH Oh no! Not the stupid, stinkin', Spin-A-Roonie! COLE Hang on! It's coming! Heat continues shaking his head, causing the crowd to get even louder. Then he stops, stretches out his arms, and yells out, "WASSSSUUUUPPPPP!?" before doing the Spin-A-Roonie to a loud pop! COLE Spin-A-Roonie! The Spin-A-Roonie! Colombian Heat with the Spin-A-Roonie! COACH Come on! That's not even a wrestling move! COLE Colombian Heat is not just a wrestler, but a showman too! COACH Oh give me a break! And X is a showman by the way. CH gets to his feet and raises his hands to acknowledge the fans. He then looks to the crowd...and puts his hands around his throat, and gasps for air. "YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE That's it! That's the signal! That's the signal for the Colombian Necktie! COACH Oh crap! Oh crap! Come on X! Come on! Look out, behind you! Behind you! Colombian Heat stalks Vitamin X. The crowd is getting hotter. Cuban Wall stands on the outside worried for his partner and friend. Heat motions for X to "Get up, fool!" X is moving his arms and legs. COACH Oh X! This won't be good! This won't be good! COLE Not for X, that's for sure! Vitamin X sits up. He is sweating and sucking wind. The crowd is clapping their hands in unison. Heat is getting more anxious by the second. COLE Vitamin X looks to be in big trouble right about now! COACH AAAH! I CAN'T WATCH! COLE Get ready, because here it comes! Vitamin X (slowly) gets to his left knee. He then pushes himself up so that he is bent over. COLOMBIAN HEAT GET UP, BITCH~! The crowd is at the hottest it's been all match. X slowly stands up right. He is groggy, sweating, and sucking wind. Colombian Heat stands right behind him ready to strike. X turns around. COACH LOOK OUT, X! Colombian Heat kicks Vitamin X in the stomach, and then turns him around. He hooks their arms together, and then turns around himself, lifting Vitamin X high up in the air! The crowd cheers! COLE Heat's got him up! Will he finish it? Colombian Heat yells at the crowd. He looks up at X's legs, then at Cuban Wall, and then at the camera, before dropping down, giving Vitamin X THE COLOMBIAN NECKTIE~!!!!!!!!111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111 "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" COLE Colombian Necktie! Colombian Necktie! Heat's done it! He's got X right where he wants him! Heat covers Vitamin X hooking his left leg. Cuban Wall panic's on the outside. Referee Mickey Jay counts, with the crowd counting along. 1... 2... 2 1/2 2.9999999999999999999999999999999999 COLOMBIAN HEAT GETS UP! COLE What? What in the world? Princess Stacey has made her way to ringside, and she has made eye contact with her ex-boyfriend! COACH Stacey has arrived! The Princess of The Lightning Crew is here! COLE What the--? Colombian Heat could have won the match! But he got up! Why? I don't understand! COACH It's because he still loves her, Cole! Heat hasn't completely gotten over Stacey yet, and this is proof, right before your very eyes! The Princess has a smirk on her face, and her hands on her hips. She laughs heartily at her ex, which only serves to annoy Heat. COLE Heat, forget about her! Get back to Vitamin X! COACH Do you think he'll listen to you? He's still in love with her! Her beauty has distracted him! COLE He told her off earlier! How could he still have feelings for her? COACH You've never been in love, have you? Colombian Heat stands in the ring, arguing with his ex-girlfriend. Nobody can actually hear what they are saying, but suffice to say, it ain't pretty, unlike the two people arguing. COLE Vitamin X is starting to recover! Heat should forget about Stacey and go back to X! COACH He will. In just a few more hours. Vitamin X is indeed starting to get up, sitting on the mat. The crowd tries to warn Heat of this, but Heat is too busy arguing. The ref can't do anything about it, since he's too busy trying to get Cuban Wall off the ring apron! COLE Now Cuban Wall is on the ring apron! This has degenerated into a wild situation here at ringside! Colombian Heat and Princess Stacey yell at each other some more, with Heat pointing a finger at her. COLOMBIAN HEAT Reconize. Bitch. Colombian Heat turns his back...which gives Stacey the perfect opportunity to rush forward and nail Heat with a low-blow! COLE Oh low-blow! Low-blow on Colombian Heat! COACH Man, has Heat's nuts taken a beating tonight! Heat holds his buffalo shot (again). Princess Stacey just laughs at Heat's misery while the crowd boos. Heat turns back to Stacey, mouthing "Why?" Stacey continues laughing. And things are about to get worst for Heat as Vitamin X is back up and grabbing Heat from behind! X lifts Colombian Heat up onto his shoulders in a Torture Rack position. COLE Oh my! Look at X! VX holds Heat up on his shoulders for a few seconds...before throwing him off his shoulders, giving him a neckbreaker on the way down! Reverse TKO! COLE What a move! What a move from Vitamin X! COACH That was incredible! You just saw the strength of Vitamin X! Stacey jumps up and down, applauding X. The crowd winces in pain at what they just saw. Colombian Heat lies in the center of the ring, so Vitamin X gets up and smiles evilly. The crowd boos. Vitamin X exits the ring and climbs the top rope. COLE He could be going for it! COACH Leap Of Faith time! Cuban Wall has finally gotten off the ring apron. So Mickey Jay watches as X ascends the top turnbuckle. Stacey and Wall hold their breath as VX carefully positions himself on the top rope, before standing up straight, looking down at Heat, and then blowing at kiss to Stacey. COLE Oh please. Vitamin X smiles evilly as he jumps off the top rope. LEAP OF FAITH~! COLE The Leap Of Faith connects! Vitamin X hitting Colombian Heat with that elbow drop right into the heart! COACH How appropriate. Vitamin X has a smirk on his face as he readjusts his right elbow pad and then makes the cover, hooking Heat's right leg. Referee Mickey Jay counts. Princess Stacey and Cuban Wall count along. The crowd boos. 1! 2! 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *DING DING DING* (6:45) "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COLE And he does it! Vitamin X has defeated Colombian Heat! COACH Yippee! Stacey jumps up and down some more while Cuban Wall pumps a fist in the air. "Bling-Bling" by The B.G. featuring The Big Tymers and Hot Boys starts playing. X still has a smirk on his face as Mickey Jay raises his hands in victory. BUFFER Here is your winner...VITAMINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN EXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX! The crowd boos some more. Colombian Heat puts his hands over his head, crushed at his defeat. X gets up and does the Shane-O-Mac Shuffle, and then raises his hands in the air again, smiling and laughing evilly. COACH Vitamin X has done it! He has gotten revenge over Colombian Heat! COLE But he needed help to do it! COACH Still he has done it! Vitamin X is on a roll! COLE Indeed, he is on a roll, Coach! While Colombian Heat's bad luck streak continues! COACH And it will continue next week when Tha Puerto Rican and Stephen Joseph Popick defeat Colombian Heat and Spanish Fly to retain the HI-YAH World Tag Team Titles! WOO-HOO~! Vitamin X raises his hands once again. Princess Stacey and Cuban Wall come into the ring to congratulate him. Stacey hugs VX and then kisses him on the lips, while Wall high fives his friend. X laughs at Heat's misery as "Bling-Bling" continues playing over the P.A. system. COLE Let's take a look at the highlights of this match. The OAOAST HeldDOWN~! logo flashes across the screen. Cut to the replays starting with Vitamin X attacking Colombian Heat before the bell. COACH X thought he could have an advantage attacking before the bell. Gotta give him some credit for thinking of that. Sadly, Heat defended himself and threw X out of the ring. But X was on him like me on a hooker Friday nights, attacking him with those legendary elbow drops and suplexes. Heat shockingly fought back and hit X with the Colombian Necktie, but before Heat could get the win, he STUPIDLY got up to chat with Princess Stacey. Then when he wasn't looking, Stacey gave him a low-blow, and that allowed PRINCE Vitamin the opportunity to do that cool looking move he did, and finish off with the Leap Of Faith, getting the win for himself AND Princess Stacey! COLE For himself AND Princess Stacey? COACH Yeah, now that chapter of their lives is done, and they can move on. COLE They just got together last week. COACH It was a short chapter. The OAOAST HeldDOWN~! logo flashes across the screen. We return to live action with Cuban Wall kicking Colombian Heat in the stomach! COLE Oh what a cheapshot! Cuban Wall, Vitamin X, and Princess Stacey leave the ring. X spits on Heat as they leave. Colombian Heat is still lying on the mat in pain. COLE I don't think we've seen the last of this feud. Something tells me that Vitamin X and "Princess" Stacey aren't done messing with Heat, yet. COACH They are. What makes you think they aren't? COLE Because The Lightning Crew loves screwing with Colombian Heat. COACH I know. But believe me. It's done. It's done. It's---OH MY GOD! LOOK! Princess Stacey lifts her skirt up, showing her black thong, to taunt Heat. Vitamin X points to Stacey's ass saying, "I tap that now!" Prince Vitamin puts his left arm around his Princess Stacey's shoulders, while Cuban Wall stands next to Stacey and sticks his tongue out. COACH That was beautiful! COLE The Lightning Crew is toying with Heat's emotions! They know he's at his lowest point, and they love it! COACH That thong, thong, thong, thong, thong! COLE Coach! COACH Sorry! Brains & Brawn and Princess Stacey walk up the entrance ramp, smiling evilly. The crowd continues booing loudly. Colombian Heat is starting to get up, crawling around the ring. COACH How crappy must Colombian Heat be feeling? He lost his girlfriend to The Lightning Crew 2 weeks ago. THEN, his girlfriend decided she LIKED The Lightning Crew and stayed with them, turning on him last week. And NOW, Colombian Heat just got hit in the junk by his ex and got beaten by his arch-rival! God, does it SUCK to be Colombian Heat or what? COLE Colombian Heat hasn't had the best of times in the OAOAST recently, that's for sure. COACH And it'll get worst next week. The pain WILL continue! COLE It may or may not, Coach. Because next week, the #1 Contenders to the HI-YAH World Tag Team Championship, Colombian Heat and Spanish Fly, finally get their shot against the HI-YAH Tag Team Champions, Stephen Joseph Popick and "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican in a 2 Out Of 3 Falls Match! Who will come out on top of that match? COACH (subliminally) PR/Popick. COLE Who will walk out next week with the HI-YAH World Tag Team Titles? COACH (subliminally) PR/Popick. COLE And will Colombian Heat be able to get his mind focused back on wrestling and not on Stacey? COACH (subliminally) No he won't. Go PR/Popick. COLE We'll find out next week, for what is sure to be an exciting match! We'll be back with more HeldDOWN~! right after this! COACH (subliminally) PR/Popick. Colombian Heat is crawling to a turnbuckle. Heat uses the bottom rope to pull himself up. Heat is sweating, breathing hard, and absolutely crushed. The crowd watches on as the depressed Colombian Heat gets up while "Bling-Bling" by The B.G. featuring The Big Tymers and Hot Boys continues playing over the P.A. system. [b]* COMMERCIAL BREAK *[/b] The camera cuts to the lockerroom where Cuban Wall, Vitamin X, and Princess Stacey are celebrating. X has a towel around his neck and is holding a water bottle in his right hand. "Mean" Gene Okerland is standing by. "MEAN" GENE OKERLAND Fans, "Mean" Gene Okerland here, and I am about to get a word with Vitamin X concerning his victory over Colombian Heat just a few moments ago. X, how do you feel about your victory over Colombian Heat? VITAMIN X How do I feel? How do you think I feel, baldy? I feel great! I am on top of the world right now! I've got the greatest girl in the world by my side. I've got the greatest tag team partner a guy could ever have backing me up! AND, I've got that piece of lower class filth crying like a baby! Gene-O, I am in HEAVEN! "MEAN" GENE Yes, X, you have things going your way right now. But tell me this, do you fear any reprecussions from Colombian Heat following what's happened in the past two weeks? CUBAN WALL What's with all the questions, old man? "MEAN" GENE I'm an OAOAST interviewer. It's my job. Before Cuban Wall can do anything, Vitamin X tells him to back off, and brings the microphone to his lips. X puts his right arm around Princess Stacey's shoulders. VX "Mean" Gene, I am not NOT afraid of Colombian Heat! There's only two things I'm afraid of in this world: death and the IRS. Heat is not one of those things! If Heat wants some, he's more then likely gonna get a response, because The X-Man won't back down from him nor will I back down from NOBODY! Everything I have said I will do, I have done. I said that Stacey Robertson would come to me. And she did! I said that I would beat Colombian Heat. And I did! Colombian Heat, and anybody else in the OAOAST for that matter, cannot stop me, no matter how hard they try! So, if anybody wants to step up to the plate, and take their Vitamin X, then be my guest, because I am NOT going to go anywhere for a long long time! Not as long as I've got Cuban Wall and Stacey Robertson with me! That's right, man, Brains & Brawn are BACK baby! And with Princess Stacey as our manager, nothing will stop us now! You wanna know why? Because-- BRAINS & BRAWN WE ARE JUST THAT MUCH BETTER THAN YOU~! VX NOW GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE! Vitamin X, Cuban Wall, and Princess Stacey go back to celebrating, laughing manically. "MEAN" GENE OKERLAND Cole, Coach, back to you!

Also, is Papacita still doing graphics for us? I ask because November Reign didn't have any graphics and neither did the New Year's show.

-Also, there's going to be a Lightning Crew segment in their dressing room -And a Heat-Fly/D*LUX segment, which I'm pretty sure KC is writing

Hey cool, thanks for adding some of my guys, but don't forget Tha Puerto Rican, man. Okay, so so far it's: -LETHAL RUMBLE MATCH (written by Alfdogg and KingPK) - RECEIVED -SURVIVE OR SURRENDER CAREER vs. CAREER Bruce Blank vs. Zack Malibu (written by Bruce Blank and Zack Malibu right?) - RECEIVED -Los Diablos de Fuego vs. Beverly Hills Blonds (written by Tony149) - RECEIVED -OAOAST WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP Chicks Over Dicks (Champions) vs. The Sooner Bruisers (Challengers) (written by Patty O' Green) - RECEIVED -TRIPLE THREAT TAG TEAM MATCH FOR THE HI-YAH WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP Colombian Heat and Spanish Fly (Champions) vs. "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican and Stephen Joseph Popick (Challengers) vs. D*LUX (Challengers with Jade Rodez) (written by Ed Wood Caulfield and King Cucaracha) -James Wolfenstein Vs "The guy that paid off the Footsoldiers & the South Central Militia" (written by Bruce Blank) -OAOAST X-DIVISION CHAMPIONSHIP Reject (Champion) vs. "The Birmingham Bad Boy" Jamie O' Hara (Challenger) (written by Alfdogg) - RECEIVED -Princess Stacey (with Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez) vs. Jade Rodez (written by King Cucaracha) - RECEIVED I'm doing this so that when I get the matches, I'll edit in "RECEIVED" next to the match.

Depends on how many matches you're wanting me to write. I was thinking we split it evenly 50/50.

What about our X-Title plans?

Man, I can't believe Evolution was formed FOUR years ago. Jesus.

I'm just about to send the main event in a few minutes. EDIT: And it's in. I highly recommend that you all read the main event this week. You're not going to believe the ending! Seriously. So, go. Read. And feedback too. Please?

I'm working on the main event as we speak.

I mean, we show the wrestlers posing and doing stuff, while their soundbytes play. They did it at the 2003 Royal Rumble. They did something similar for the opening of WrestleMania XX too.

For the Lethal Rumble, I'm putting "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican in for the fourth year in a row. But also, I would like it if you added Colombian Heat, Spanish Fly, and if possible, Vitamin X, Cuban Wall, and John "Rock Hard" Brickston. VX and Brickston I would be okay with you not adding, but I would REALLY appreciate it if you added in Heat, Fly, and Wall.

I'm posting the show this year. So send everything to me. Speaking of which, for the intro for this year's show, I'd thought it'd be cool if we do like the WWE did for the Royal Rumble a few years ago, where we have the OAOAST wrestlers in the Lethal Rumble talk about what the Lethal Rumble means to them and how important it is to win and go to AngleMania. So send me little "soundbytes" I guess you can say of your wrestler(s) talking about being in the Lethal Rumble Match. All I ask is that you have them all end their promos with "The Road To AngleMania begins...tonight!"

Whoa! I actually got promoted! Thanks!

-NO DISQUALIFICATION MATCH "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican (with Stephen Joseph Popick and The Lightning Crew) vs. Colombian Heat (with Stacey Robertson) (If "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican wins, Stacey Robertson becomes a member of The Lightning Crew. If Colombian Heat wins, Vitamin X must stay 500 feet away from Stacey Robertson at all times.) -Colombian Heat and Stacey Robertson segment concerning Stacey's time spent with The Lightning Crew before, during, and after New Year's Eve -"The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican promo concerning his match against Colombian Heat this week I call main event. EDIT: Cool! Thanks!

Sure. I wouldn't have a problem with that. Zack Malibu's match is in, and so is his segment, which I recommend you all read. I also wrote the last Lightning Crew New Year's Eve Party segment, which I also recommend you all read. Oh, and I've fixed some little boo-boos I made while posting the show. SOOOOOO, the show is now complete. Finally. So go. Read. Feedback. Do something!

Okay, so this took a little bit longer than I expected, but the good news is that the show is finally up and ready to be read. I'm only missing Zack's match and a Lightning Crew segment that I'll write later. Other than that, I got everything. I read most of the matches while posting them, and they were really good. Hopefully somebody edits in the rest of the OAOAST World Tag Team Title Match soon. I want to see who wins, damn it! Thanks for letting me post the show. I can do it again sometime if you want. It's not so hard once you get the hang of it. All right, so this is 2007. A new year, so hopefully we get alot more feedback this year, I hope. And was anybody surprised that I went with a Beastie Boys song as the theme song?

Credits PRODUCED BY OAOAST Entertainment EXECUTIVE PRODUCER Zack Malibu DIRECTED BY Ed Wood Caulfield OAOAST CREATED BY Cobainwasmurdered Tony149 Anglesault WRITTEN BY King Cucaracha Ed Wood Caulfield Alfdogg Bruce Blank Tony149 NYU © 2007 OAOAST Entertainment All Rights Reserved

SUNDAY NIGHT JANUARY 28, 2007 "THE ROAD TO ANGLEMANIA BEGINS..." LIVE ON PAY-PER-VIEW! COLE Anglepalooza is only four weeks away! The event that kicks off our Road To AngleMania VI, which itself is 90 days away! And this AngleMania looks to be the best ever, emulating LIVE from the Toronto Skydome in Toronto, Onatrio, Canada in front of 60,000+ fans. Boy, I can't wait! COACH I can't wait either. Can't wait for the main event to start, that is! Go Drek! W00t~! COLE Well folks, we're supposed to be getting to the Main Event at this point, but amazingly enough, it seems Drek Stone still hasn't arrived at the arena tonight! COACH It's the traffic, Michael. It must be going up all the way towards Sasketchewan. COLE Did you even spell that correctly? COACH No idea! COLE Coach, Drek shouldn't even BE this late in the first place! He's the Heavyweight Champion! He's the top representative of this company! Do you realize just how disrespectful his actions have been the last few weeks? I mean, my God, we have a Pay-Per-View tonight, and he can't even be bothered to show up on time! COACH Whoa, whoa, slow down Cole. Drek Stone said he was coming tonight and you can be rest assured he'll be here. COLE Coach, time is up! This is it! We're at the Main Event! There literally is no more time to waste! Besides my world renowned ping pong ball act, we have nothing else to do tonight. COACH So we end forty minutes early. Not like doing that has ever left the fans feeling outraged before! COLE I just don't... Before Michael Cole can finish his statement, the camera immediately cuts to the parking lot to see a flashy white limousine slowly pulling into the parking lot of the Ocean Center. However, instead of stopping, the sparkling limo continues driving past the designated parking area and towards ringside! COACH Here we go, Cole! Arriving in style and fashionably late! COLE Where's he'is he planning on driving out here?! The stagehands, who clearly did not know of this stunt beforehand, scramble to clear the area as the beautiful automobile surfaces through the curtains and slowly makes its way towards the ring, rolling down the red-carpeted aisleway. The car stops halfway and, as soon as it does, Drek Stone steps out of the limo with a beaming smile and the Heavyweight Title already adorned around his waist. Already dressed in his ring gear, Drek raises his arms out to the crowd expecting to hear a hero's welcome, but is unsurprisingly jeered instead. COACH AND he's already dressed to compete. I think you owe the man an apology. COLE It doesn't matter. I asked the question on Thursday and I'll ask it again tonight. Has Drek Stone really prepared for this match tonight? It doesn't seem like he's taking it seriously and, my God, if he doesn't, he could be in serious trouble here at Mainframe Monday! Once Drek Stone steps into the ring, he proudly slaps his chest, setting off a parade of red, white, and green fireworks blasting from the four corners of the ring. Looking completely relaxed and pleased with himself, Drek sits himself on the top turnbuckle with a grin and stares up at the Angletron, waiting to hear about his upcoming opponent. Sure enough, Gene Okerlund then appears on screen, looking exactly the same as he did in 1986. It's amazing. The man simply does not age. OKERLUND Up next, ladies and gentlemen, we're coming to the Main Event! Drek Stone is making his in-ring return after a brief hiatus and he will be defending the Heavyweight Title against one of three men! Who will it be? The blast from the past with CWM? The resident legend of the OAOAST in Tony Brannigan? Or the man voted Rookie of the Year in the 2006 Angle Awards and the one man considered to be the future of the OAOAST with Landon Maddix? Well, let's look at the results! For the last time tonight, Gene Okerlund points to the screen above him and watches the neon lights flicker to reveal the results. But the votes come nearly as much a surprise to him as they do to everybody else. A) THE PAST: CWM --- 16% B) THE PRESENT: TONY BRANNIGAN --- 42% C) THE FUTURE: LANDON MADDIX --- 42% COLE Uh... COACH ...wait, you have to be kidding me. COLE A tie?! With his eyes slowly widening at the news, Drek slowly shakes his head back and forth, almost not believing the results in front of him. His cheeks turn a darker shade of red as the grin on his face begins to transform into a scowl. COLE Folks, these numbers are not touched! They're not changed in the slightest! These are the results we were given...and it appears Tony Brannigan and Landon Maddix ended up in a statistical tie! I've never seen anything like this before. COACH Well, Michael, what does this mean? Since neither man won, I guess Drek keeps the title by default, correct? COLE ...I don't think that's the case. As Drek continues to confusingly stare at the Angletron, taking a moment to glare at the crowd who are delighting in his misery, the referee stands listening to his earpiece. After a moment, he strides over to the ring announcer and whispers into his ear. The announcer's eyes widen for a second, but he then nods and picks up his microphone. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, it appears the results have ended in a statistical dead heat. With both Tony Brannigan and Landon Maddix garnering 42% of the vote each, they are tied in the vote for a Heavyweight Title matchup tonight. But President Bill Watts has made his decision. Because of the strange conditions tonight, Drek Stone will not be defending the title in a one-on-one situation tonight. Drek takes a comforted breath. BUFFER Rather, he will be DEFENDING his Heavyweight Title against Tony Brannigan and Landon Maddix in a TRIPLE THREAT MATCH! “YEAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!” Drek Stone furiously pounds his arms against the top turnbuckle and angrily spins his head to find Michael Buffer. But, by this point, the announcer has smartly jumped out of the ring to avoid the champion's tantrum. Seething wrathfully, Drek unclasps the title from around his waist and throws it at the nearby referee. Yet, just as he does so--- “He's Simply Ravishing...OW!” “YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!” COLE Here we go! The Daytona crowd goes BALLISTIC as Tony Brannigan barges out through the curtains and begins stomping his way down the aisleway. Drek Stone, who suddenly finds terror surging through his veins, turns to Tony and nervously raises his arms up, almost as if he's surrendering to the big man in an attempt to calm him down. T-Bod immediately slides into the ring but, before the bell can ring, Tony Brannigan charges forward and levels Drek Stone with a powerful haymaker. COLE OH MY! One shot and Drek Stone goes down! COACH COME ON! Tony Brannigan isn't even waiting for Landon Maddix! STOP THIS! Drek pops up but Tony hits him with another massive haymaker. The sheer force of the punch snaps Drek's head back, giving Tony the chance to hit him with another huge fist! The crowd roars as T-Bod gets him with another one! The might of Tony's fifth punch sends Drek sprawling nearly halfway across the ring. Helplessly propelling himself off the ropes, Drek bounces back towards his opponent and gets a sixth haymaker sending him flying into the corner! At that moment--- “REACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH” “Personal Jesus” by Marilyn Manson blasts over the loudspeakers as Landon “La Cucaracha” Maddix and his lovely valet Megan Skye step through the curtains looking seemingly more excited than they ever have before. The crowd immediately boos the duo's arrival, but these two are way too consumed with thoughts of the Heavyweight Title to even care. COLE Landon Maddix has to be thrilled! It seems his begging two weeks ago actually paid off! COACH Cole, Drek Stone is being beaten pillar to post and it's like you don't even care! DON'T YOU CARE?! Once Landon and Megan step near the ringside area, they quickly stop. Yet, instead of getting into the ring, Maddix simply stands outside and watches as Tony Brannigan irately releases all his frustrations on the Heavyweight Champion. The man is way too smart to interject himself into the match too early. COACH Ugh, some clever strategy from Landon Maddix, I have to admit. COLE Coach, it's clear after all this time, that Tony Brannigan has not forgotten anything Drek Stone has done to him in the past ten months! COACH Even worse than that, I think he heard what Drek said about him on Thursday night. This match has now turned into a path to redemption for Tony Brannigan! As Landon Maddix stares anxiously from outside of the ring, not wanting to get involved in this melee at the slightest, Drek pitifully tries to swing back to stop the onslaught. Tony, not in the mood to humor the Heavyweight Champion, merely swats his hands away and blasts him with a nasty forearm across the jaw! The intense velocity sends Drek flying up several feet in the air before falling and crashing his head against the bottom turnbuckle! The Daytona crowd only screams louder as Tony starts laying in a vicious series of stomps against the Italian Stallion's head, going so far as to even choke him with the side of his boot. The referee, completely aware that the bell has not rang yet, screams at Tony Brannigan to release the suffocating hold. Once Tony takes his foot off Drek's neck, Stone quickly slides underneath the bottom rope and stumbles to the arena floor. COACH Drek just needs to regain his composure, that's all. COLE It's obvious that he didn't expect Tony to come out here THIS fired up tonight. Drek Stone is being completely manhandled! Taking a deep breath, Drek tries walking away briskly but, of course, Tony has already followed after him. With rage now coarsing through his veins, Tony grabs a solid handful of Drek's hair and CHARGES forward---THROWING HIM OVER THE ANNOUNCING TABLE AND DIRECTLY INTO MICHAEL COLE AND THE COACH! COACH OH SH--- COLE OH NO, MY SEWING KIT! The two announcers fall over their chairs and to the floor as Drek hopelessly lays underneath the announcing table. But, yet again, Tony is there and waiting. With Drek unable to cover up, Tony sits on the champion's chest and begins pummeling him with hard right hands across his forehead. Cole and Coach scramble to put their headphones back on as T-Bod continues the punishment. COLE I---I---.folks, can you hear me? My God, this has gotten completely out of hand! COACH How hasn't security or something gotten involved at this point?! Drek needs a chance to breathe! COLE I want to see WHAT security guard would be brave enough to interject himself into a situation like this! COACH Carl Winslow would. COLE Besides him. As the official once again screams for Tony Brannigan to cease fighting or risk losing his title shot tonight, the camera catches a glimpse of the now busted-open Heavyweight Champion. With a gash across his right eyebrow, blood has already began trickling across Drek's right eye and down the side of his nose. Gasping for deep breaths at this point, he's prone for more harsh punches from the challenger. Once the crimson mask oozes to the bottom of Drek's cheek, Tony grabs the Italian Stallion by his neck and struggles to put him back up to his feet. Once Drek does so, Tony steps back and levels him with ANOTHER haymaker, sending the champion back over the table and closer to the ring! Meanwhile, Maddix has taken a seat on the ramp, choosing to relax instead of getting involved so quickly. With a bucket of popcorn he swiped from a nearby fan that could do without the transfat, and the lovely Megan Skye sitting on his lap, he sits there with a smile on his face eagerly crunching as he watches the action in front of him. With the camera on Landon, one fan makes it a point to loudly boo the unbeloved superstar. Maddix flicks a piece of popcorn at the spectator and breaks out into an obnoxious laugh as the kernel hilariously bounces off the jeerer's head. COLE I have to admit I cannot fault Landon Maddix for not getting involved with this one yet. If Tony Brannigan can completely take Drek Stone out of this match early on, Landon finds himself with only one obstacle left on his way to the championship. COACH Cole, have we even talked about how unjust this match is yet? The deal was that Drek Stone only had to face ONE opponent tonight...not two! COLE Well, that's how the voting ended up. The fans were split in a dead heat over Landon Maddix and Tony Brannigan! COACH Well, have Landon and Tony settle it with a game of ring toss or something! I don't know, they could play Guess Who or Don't Wake Daddy to decide who faces Drek one-on-one. But it is NOT fair for Drek Stone tonight to face both these guys. That wasn't the deal! And Michael, it's clear the shock has affected Drek's head in a major way! As Drek tries crawling away slowly, Tony scoops the Heavyweight Champion back up to his feet once more and rolls him underneath the bottom rope. Pursuing his opponent, possibly to end this thing here and now, Tony climbs onto the ring apron and steps through the ropes. As Drek lays lifelessly on the mat, Tony goes stomping towards his arch-rival...but Landon Maddix suddenly jumps off the top rope and takes Tony Brannigan off his feet with a beautiful missile dropkick! COACH He played it smart, Cole! With Tony down, and all three men now in the ring, the bell rings--- DING DING DING ---see? And Landon scrambles over to cover the incapacitated Heavyweight Champion! ONNNNEEEEEEEEEEE~! TWWWWOOOOOOOO~! SHOULDER UP! Although blood is still trickling from the right side of his face, Drek manages to emphatically escape the pin. Wanting to make his impact here and now, Landon grabs Drek by his arm and quickly forces him back up to his feet. He forcefully whips him into the ropes and as Drek bounces back Landon jumps up and hits the Heavyweight Champion with a crisp Cucaracha kick across the bridge of his nose! The direct hit snaps Drek's neck back and forces Stone back down to the ground. With that, Landon makes the cover again. ONNNNNEEEEEEEEEEE~! TWWWWOOOOOOOOO~! And, once again, Drek spiritedly thrusts his shoulder into the air. With a disappointed toss of her hair, Megan Skye bangs on the ring apron as Maddix begins picking himself back up. Despite telling his girl “Hey baby, you ain't no Alex Van Halen. Quit it with the drums”, she continues to slam her hands on the mat. Once Maddix stands though, Tony abruptly comes from behind and bangs him with a MASSIVE lariat across the back of his head! Sprawling to the corner as if a tree trunk just cracked his skull, Maddix props his chest against the turnbuckle, which allows Tony to run forward and deliver a vicious shoulder thrust against Landon's spine! As the Wildcard howls in pain, Tony steps back and bangs his muscular shoulder against Maddix's back once more! COLE It cannot be forgotten, for as much as Tony Brannigan hates Drek Stone, he's not a fan of Landon Maddix either! Landon, one of the Wildcards that entered the OAOAST so many months ago, has been one of the main superstars to trash this federation's history. And if there's anybody in this company that respects where the OAOAST is today, it's Tony Brannigan. He doesn't take kindly to such talk. COACH I still don't like where this is going. Tony looks like a man on a mission tonight. And it's clear this biased crowd is completely behind him too. As Tony rams his shoulder into Landon Maddix a third time, delighted in hearing his fellow challenger yell out woefully, T-Bod steps back to give himself a chance to breathe. That turns out to be a mistake for him though. As he does so, Drek swiftly grabs his opponent from behind in a reverse front facelock position...and drops him firmly onto the mat with a reverse DDT! COACH And there we go! Taking advantage like no one else ever could! COLE And for the first time since he came out tonight, Drek Stone has hit an offensive move! As Drek pushes himself off Tony's chest to get back to his feet, Landon Maddix charges forward to try to put the champion back down again. Thinking one step ahead though, Drek catches Landon and tosses him up high in the air! With a rather tall vertical leap, Landon lands directly on Tony's sternum with a textbook double stomp! As the crowd applauds the athleticism, Maddix immediately turns around...but catches a vicious superkick across his jaw courtesy of Drek Stone! The fans roar with jeers as Drek collapses to the mat and begins to take slow, deep breaths to help himself recover. COACH See Cole? It's like riding a bike. Drek had to acquaint himself with the ring again for a few minutes but he's doing fine now! It's like he never left! COLE I don't necessarily agree. I think it's plain to see he hasn't prepared as seriously for this match as either Tony Brannigan or Landon Maddix. Tony's looking stronger than ever, so he clearly worked out for weeks once he heard the rumblings of this match. And Maddix, as seen before, has mapped out a mental strategy with biding his time and taking advantage when he can. Yet Drek Stone was making a movie. COACH Not just any movie though, Michael Cole! Ocean's Thirteen coming to theaters in June 2007! COLE Yeah, yeah. Well, if it doesn't have Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger, I'm not interested. Now that he's had a few moments to compose himself, Drek sets sights on his main target tonight. Wanting to get revenge for what transpired earlier, Drek immediately sets his sights on the big man and pounces on T-Bod's chest. With surprising ferocity, he then begins peppering a nasty series of haymakers against the tag team specialist's skull, cursing his opponent's name with every blow. DREK You failure! Another punch. DREK You big failure! Another hard right hand. DREK I'll end you! Yet another haymaker. DREK Don't you EVER--- And one more. DREK EVER---. Hey, let's add a final one for the road. DREK DO THAT AGAIN! Pleased with himself over this attack, Drek quickly pushes himself back up to his feet and takes this time to stand over his fallen opponent. Looking out at the Daytona crowd, who are only too eager to hurl their insults at the champion, Drek holds both his arms out to different sides. He then clasps both hands behind the back of his head and begins gyrating his hips over the innovator of this taunt. Many of the women in attendance scream as Drek flexes and swivels in a clear attempt to disrespect his challenger tonight. COACH You see that?! How would Drek Stone be able to pull out a dance like this if he wasn't at the top of his game?! Unfortunately, Drek Stone has failed to remember he's in a Triple Threat match tonight. And, in Triple Threats, whenever you think you're safe with one guy down, there's always another lurking. Sure enough, as the Heavyweight Champion taunts Tony Brannigan, Landon Maddix takes this opportunity to stand directly behind Drek Stone, jump up, and clutching his arms around Drek's neck and placing his knees directly on Stone's spine...falling back with a VICIOUS LUNGBLOWER! A thick wad of spit flies out of Drek's mouth as he bounces a few feet into the air before crumpling to the mat. Landon, showing his eagerness, makes the cover for the third time in this match. ONNNNNEEEEEEEE~! TWWWWWOOOOOO~! And, just as before, Drek muscles himself out of the pinning predicament. This time though, after kicking out, Drek quickly rolls himself up to a kneeling position and places a hand on his spine to help alleviate the pain. Landon moves to take a step towards the Heavyweight Champion but stops once Drek picks his head up and locks eyes with his newest opponent. Landon, almost respectfully, stares at the established superstar before him while Drek warily glances at the man that has nearly pinned him almost three times so far. COLE I think there's more than meets the eye here. Like Drek said in his interview last Thursday, he gets the impression that Landon Maddix is trying to be a younger version of himself. Whether it's right or wrong, that issue is clearly weighing heavily on Drek's mind at this point. COACH Well, Michael, it's obvious. Maddix has been doing everything right so far. Picking his spots to attack. Taking advantage of every opportunity, no matter how cheap. That is the kind of strategy Drek has used to be where he is today. And, at least up until this point, Landon Maddix has been using that strategy even better than the Heavyweight Champion. It's gotta be making Drek a little uneasy. With the two still staring at one another, Drek rises back up to his feet and moves closer towards the young challenger. The two move face-to-face, neither wanting to break the staredown. However Drek, from the corner of his eye, sees Tony beginning to stir on the mat. Almost instinctively, he dashes forward and cracks a nasty boot against Brannigan's chin, sending the big man's head back down. Landon, with a curious grin, looks down and sees Tony beginning to stir once again. This time, HE rattles a nasty kick against T-Bod's skull, forcing the legend to hold his head in pain. Drek, not wanting Landon to get the last word, kicks Tony's head once again. Landon, refusing to slow down, then quickly does the same. COLE It seems like this is turning into some kind of contest now. It's like they want to see who can inflict more pain on Tony Brannigan. COACH Now this is a game I can get into! However, the peaceful competition doesn't last for long. This catch-as-catch-can contest quickly degenerates as both men then simultaneously begin rapidly stomping Tony's head against the mat. T-Bod tries covering up his cranium to no avail as his two opponents continue to bash his skull into the ground in an attempt to prove their superiority over one another. As Landon comes down with a particularly harsh stomp though, Drek turns with a sadistic smile and swiftly kicks Maddix in the testicles! The crowd groans loudly as Maddix immediately clutches his balls---for lack of a better term---and crumbles to the mat. Drek stares down at him with a self-satisfied grin as he raises his arms and delightedly summons his strength from the crowd's disapproval. COLE And with that, I think the teamwork between these two is over. COACH Well, it just goes to show that Landon Maddix doesn't know every single trick from Drek Stone's arsenal. The champ can still walk out of here with his title tonight if he utilizes those little traps to their maximum. With Landon doubled over in pain, Drek runs and bounces off the ropes to continue the onslaught. However, from the outside of the ring, Megan Skye grabs a firm hold of Drek's ankle and trips him halfway through. The champion stumbles forward for a second but then turns around and angrily stares at the vixen outside the ring. Before she can flee, Drek grabs a huge handful of her hair and pulls her up to the apron. The Daytona crowd explodes into excited cheers as Landon stares at Drek, ordering him not to hurt his manager. With a grin, Drek agrees. DREK Don't worry, Landon. I won't hurt her. With that, Drek pulls Megan's head back and flicks his eyebrows at Landon. With the cockiest of smiles, Drek then leans forward and plants a long passionate kiss on the valet. Megan struggles to break free but Drek maintains the intense liplock for a few seconds before finally letting her go. COACH What a playboy! Landon Maddix can't kiss that well! COLE Uh oh. This won't lead to anything good. Completely content with himself, Drek licks his lips and turns back towards Landon Maddix...and gets TACKLED ONTO THE MAT! The crowd grows rabid as Drek and Landon roll around on the mat, pounding the hell out of each other with nasty punches and forearms. COLE I can't believe how personal this rivalry has gotten in such a short period of time! COACH This is a competitive struggle the likes we haven't seen in quite some time. They're so similar that they'll do anything to gain the mental edge over another. After a few moments of struggling and fighting, Landon finally rolls on top of Drek and peppers the champion with a hard series of right hands to the temple. The Italian Stallion tries covering up but Landon, who is now nearly as angry as Tony was earlier, won't let up as he continues to beat Drek Stone with a flurry of punches. After a few more shots, Landon stands and rubs his hand through his hair. He turns around--- ---BUT TONY BRANNIGAN LIFTS HIM UP AND GIVES HIM A SPINEBUSTER ONTO DREK STONE'S BODY! “YEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!” COLE SPINEBUSTER SANDWICH! COACH HE CAME OUT OF NOWHERE! Upon the crushing impact, Landon immediately rolls off Drek's body and towards the corner. Feeling as though the championship could be only seconds away, Tony drops down and excitedly hooks Drek Stone's leg! The cheers in the arena is deafening as the referee starts the count! ONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~!~! TWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOO~!~! THRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~!~! NO! Megan Skye has climbed into the ring and jumped onto Tony's back effectively stopping the count! COLE Oh my God! Tony Brannigan was only a millisecond away from finally capturing the title again! Damn that bitch! COACH Whoa now, Michael Cole. You can still be chivalrous in 2007. Triple Threat matches are no disqualification. It's not Megan's fault she knows the rules! COLE And just look at the irony. In the process of helping keep Landon in this match, Megan is now inadvertently helping the man that forced himself on her only two minutes ago. COACH Ah, she loved it. With Tony temporarily disconcerted, Megan wraps one arm around T-Bod's neck and uses her free hand to claw at Brannigan's eyes. With a scowl, Tony climbs off Drek and stands up, with Megan still attached to his back. Almost toying with her, T-Bod begins rocking his neck back and forth, effectively swinging the beautiful valet from side to side. Once she's had enough of the ride, she releases the sleeperhold and falls to her feet, which allows T-Bod to pick Megan up high over his head in a gorilla press slam position! COACH Oh no! I can't watch this! COLE She should have never gotten involved in the first place! As Megan flails her arms and legs in a desperate attempt to get out of this predicament, Tony begins lifting her up and down above his head, effectively flexing his muscles for the privileged crowd. With the crowd pleading for Tony to slam her down, he marches around the ring, clearly reveling in getting his revenge for the time being. Once he gets to the center of the ring, he stops and holds Megan up high--- ---BUT LANDON MADDIX CHOP-BLOCKS TONY BRANNIGAN FROM BEHIND! The offensive move stuns Tony enough to lose his grip and fall backwards, causing Megan to fall right on top of him! The crowd jeers disappointedly as Landon, with a goofy grin, pats Megan Skye's ass. MADDIX I knew you were always handy for something. With Tony Brannigan down for the time being, and Drek Stone still completely stunned from the spinebuster, it has now become Landon Maddix's time to shine. The crowd explodes into a shocking mixed reaction as Landon fully realizes the magnitude of the situation he is in right now. Both guys are out and Maddix is currently the only man left standing! COLE This could be it, Coach! It really could! COACH Come on Drek! You have a movie on the way! This night isn't about Landon Maddix...it's about YOU! GET UP! With half the Daytona crowd now suddenly behind him, and the other half still disapproving of the Wildcard, Maddix dashes towards the corner and immediately hops onto the top turnbuckle. Seeing that Tony is in still no position to get back up yet, Landon braces himself. Shimmying his shoulders slightly, Landon maintains his balance. He then leaps off the top rope--- ---AND LANDS ON TONY BRANNIGAN'S CHEST WITH A PICTURE-PERFECT FROG SPLASH! The sheer FORCE of the splash sends Landon recoiling back up several inches before landing on Tony's sternum once again! As Tony tries taking short, shallow breaths to quickly regain his equilibrium, Landon wastes no time! With Megan screaming from outside the ring, Landon hooks both legs and covers the legendary T-Bod! ONNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEE~! COLE Drek Stone is still down and out from the spinebuster! COACH Tony, you have me CHEERING for you now! KICK OUT! TWWWWWWWOOOOOOOO~! COACH No! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! THRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE~! NO!!! TONY BRANNIGAN RAISES HIS SHOULDER UP AT THE ABSOLUTE LAST SECOND! COACH Oh my heart! LORD, I'M COMING! COLE What a close call! Drek Stone should kiss Tony's boots after this match, win or lose, for that kickout! With an obvious frustrated scowl, Landon immediately sits up and angrily pulls at his finely shampooed hair. Almost not believing that Tony just kicked out, Landon curses to himself before focusing his eyes back on the big man. But before he can begin to stand, Drek sprints from the nearby turnbuckle, jumps up and SMACKS LANDON MADDIX WITH A BRUTAL SHINING WIZARD! COLE Oh my God! Where did that come from?! COACH YES! Drek just hit that move better than I've EVER seen Landon Maddix do it! JUST MAKE THE COVER, DREK! NOW! With a thrilled smile, Drek immediately floats over and covers Landon Maddix for the count. No taunting. No posing. No cockiness. Drek is desperate for the pin and will do anything to get it. The referee immediately drops down. ONNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~! TWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOO~! THRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEE~! SHOULDER UP!! Landon Maddix gets a shoulder up! COLE Nobody in this match will give up! COACH Everybody has something to prove, Michael Cole. Nobody wants to be the man that walks away a total failure! Totally dismayed that the Shining Wizard wasn't enough to end the match, Drek spits on the mat and takes a deep breath. Pushing himself up to his feet, he suddenly finds himself blindsided with a huge haymaker across the temple from Tony Brannigan. The fans continue to cheer as Tony hits him with another punch, rocking him several feet back. Meanwhile, Landon rolls over onto his side and tries slowly picking himself back up, refusing to stay on the mat for long. As Drek attempts to stop Tony's onslaught with a clothesline, the big man ducks it and watches Drek stumble forward aimlessly. As the champion turns around, T-Bod quickly wraps his arms around the Italian's waist in a belly-to-belly suplex. Drek weakly pounds his arms against Tony's head to convince him to let go but it just isn't happening. With a surge of strength, Tony FLIPS Drek Stone over his head--- ---but as Drek Stone flies into a standing Landon Maddix, he wraps his legs around Landon's neck and brings him down with an EXCELLENT HURICARANA! COACH THAT WAS AMAZING! COLE And the fans couldn't be more impressed! The crowd breaks out into a rousing cheer as Drek Stone pops back up to his feet, almost as if he's unaware of the move he just pulled out. He doesn't have much time to celebrate though. Tony quickly picks him up from his side and drops him HARD onto the mat with a side salto backbreaker! The ring shakes from the impact as Tony holds on for the count. ONNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~! TWWWWOOOOOOOOOOO~! KICKOUT~! Tony wipes the sweat off his brow as he stares disgustedly at the dried crimson mask on the Heavyweight Champion's face. With the motivation of the title still driving him, Tony stands and wraps both his hands around Drek Stone's throat. Drek's eyes nearly pop out of his skull as T-Bod's grip tightens and he squeezes the air out of Stone's lungs. With his hands still around Drek's neck, Tony uses his massive strength to lift the Italian Stallion off the mat and HIGH into the air. As Drek attempts to kick T-Bod in the mouth, but failing as he does so, Landon Maddix quickly takes Tony Brannigan down from behind with a schoolboy, forcing him to drop the Heavyweight Champion. The count! ONNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~! TWWWWWWOOOOOOOOO~! KICKOUT! Tony Brannigan heaves himself out of the schoolboy pin attempt and right back up to his feet. As he staggers forward though, Drek Stone catches him and immediately takes T-Bod down with a last-ditch small package. ONNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEE~! TWWWWOOOOOOOOOOO~! THRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEE~! KICKOUT! As Tony pops out of the pin attempt, all three combatants in the match quickly rise to their feet. T-Bod strikes first as he charges forward and takes the Heavyweight Champion down with a LARIATOOOOOO! Drek nearly does a backflip from the impact as Tony turns and looks to give Landon Maddix the same clothesline. As he comes hurtling forward with the clothesline though, Maddix quickly uses his ingenuity to duck the manuever. Once the momentum sends T-Bod past the Wildcard, Landon jumps up and wraps his arm around Tony's neck from behind, catching him with a textbook Dragon Sleeper! The crowd breaks out with jeers as Tony suddenly finds himself in serious trouble with Landon desperately pulling back on the hold, looking to get Tony to tap out but not caring if he pulls the man's head off his shoulders along the way. COLE This could be it! I can't see a way for Tony to escape out of this! Landon rears back on the hold even further, cranking Tony's neck to a gruesomely unnatural angle. T-Bod begins powerfully shaking his arms, hoping to find the strength to get himself out of this predicament, but Maddix only wrenches the hold even tighter! COACH You can't underestimate the power of Landon's headlocks, Cole. This is like one of those headlocks...only from behind, this time! Tony desperately tries clubbing Landon Maddix's spine with his forearms but there just isn't enogh power behind his shots. As Tony's vigor starts to quickly leave his body--- ---and as Landon Maddix ducks his head forward to squeeze the hold even tighter--- ---Drek Stone SWIFTLY wraps his arm around Landon's head in a front facelock position! COLE Where did Drek Stone just come from?! The crowd roars in major disapproval as they know what's coming next. Without a way to cover himself, Landon keeps the dragon sleeper locked in as Drek Stone drops him down to the mat with the STONECUTTER!! With the sleeper still locked in though, as Landon falls with the StoneCutter, he SNAPS Tony's head forward as well. Finally releasing the hold with that manuever, Landon lifelessly falls next to the big man as Drek Stone helplessly falls back. COACH Picking his spots, Cole! It's about all Drek Stone knowing how to pick his spots! With a deep breath, Drek Stone wastes no time. Seeing Landon Maddix out cold, and looking as though he NEEDS to get the win over this opponent tonight, Drek Stone pounces on Landon and hooks the leg. ONNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEE~! TWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOO~! THRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE~! *DING DING DING* BUFFER YOUR WINNER...AND STILLLLLLLLLLL OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION...DRRRRRRREEEEEEEEK STOOOOOOONNNNEEEEEEEEE!! A deafening amount of boos echo throughout the arena as Drek Stone quickly rolls off Landon Maddix, grabs his Heavyweight Title away from the referee, and ducks underneath the bottom rope! Clearly not wanting to give either opponent the chance to get up and try seeking revenge, Drek immediately scrambles up the aisleway, tripping once he makes it three-quarters of the way through. COACH What a title defense! Drek Stone, once again, overcame the odds! COLE If you ask me, that man is LUCKY---oh so lucky---for making it out of here with that gold! He was beaten almost several times by both Tony Brannigan AND Landon Maddix, and he really should thank whatever deity he prays to that he is walking out of here still holding onto that title! COACH You can NEVER give that man credit, can you? Is your life that sad? That depressing? You just spent the past few days talking about how much trouble Drek Stone was in! How he didn't train! How he wasn't a fighting champion! How he was a disgrace to this company!! And he proved you wrong tonight---with one match! How you are NOT standing up and saluting that man is beyond me! Now standing in the ring and leaning himself against the ropes, Tony Brannigan angrily rubs a hand through his hair and blinks the sweat out of his eyes. Looking crushed that he was not able to win tonight, despite having the fans clearly behind him to take the gold, Tony can only stare with a grimace as Drek Stone proudly holds the title above his head near the curtains. COLE Coach, you could ignore the facts all you want! But the fact of the matter is that Drek Stone needed other people to save him tonight! Tony Brannigan! Landon Maddix! Even Megan Skye! And if it wasn't for these three people breaking the pin attempts on him, I fully believe we would have seen a new Heavyweight Champion! COACH You're completely forgetting that Drek Stone didn't know he was walking into this Triple Threat situation! He thought he was getting a one-on-one match tonight, but even with this latest obstacle, he showed just how good he really is. Forget your beliefs. Whether he was facing Tony Brannigan or Landon Maddix in a singles match tonight, he would have still won! COLE Really?! You really think so?! Well, let's wait for him to defend it against those two then! The damn fighting champion he is! When is he going to make his next defense, JULY?! As Tony continues to glower about his loss, Landon Maddix sits up in the ring and stares through the ropes at the reigning Heavyweight Champion. Both Landon and Tony realize how close they came to that championship gold. They could almost taste it. And, if they get the opportunity to fight for it again sometime soon, they know the result will end up vastly different. But the point is moot. Because this isn't sometime soon. This is January 1st, 2007. And the most undedicated OAOAST wrestler competing today is still the Heavyweight Champion! As the camera slowly fades to black, Drek Stone mouths five words to his two opponents. Five monumental words. DREK Ocean's Thirteen. Coming June 8th! With that, the first-ever Mainframe Monday finally ends with Drek Stone's cocky grin. What a start to the new year. FADE OUT

Those in the arena tonight, whether still hungover from their ringing in of 2007 or not, are at a fever pitch...and that feeling throughout the crowd was never more apparent than when the opening seconds of "Save Yourself" are heard. COLE Listen to this crowd! We haven't seen him in an OAOAST arena since he was forced to shake the hand of Bruce Blank, but now, on the first day of 2007, Zack Malibu is HERE! As the song continues, the fans stare at the entrance ramp, until finally, the heart and soul of the OAOAST steps through the curtain. Zack is met with a tremendous response as he heads to the ring, slapping a few hands along the way down the aisle. COACH Mikey Cole, you know Zack Malibu almost as well as anyone...you got any idea what he's gonna say or do tonight? COLE No idea, Coach. The only thing we know is that when Malibu promises to do something, it's typically something big. Zack climbs the steps and into the ring, then waves for Michael Buffer to toss him the mic. Buffer throws it over the ropes, right into Malibu's waiting hands, and now it's just a matter of waiting for the crowd to die down. "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" COLE Listen to the fans, Coach. If there was ever a man who defined the term "Crowd favorite", it's this man, right here! MALIBU First of all, I want to wish all of you, a Happy New Year. For many of you, it's time to start over, to do things the right way, or the way you feel they should be. It's a clean slate and a fresh start, at least for most of us. The fans applaud Zack's well wishes, but can tell he's got more on his mind. MALIBU I say that it's that way for most of us, because it's not that way for me. I mean, I'm starting the year with a great girl, and a beautiful baby daughter, as well as the respect and love of you fans, and I'm grateful for all of that. I'm also starting the year the same way I ended 2006...with a heart full of rage, on a quest for redemption, and it all leads back to one man, and one man only. Bruce Blank. COLE The most hated man in the OAOAST, and likely in the wrestling world. COACH Nevermind the wrestling world...how about the world in general!? MALIBU Bruce, 2006 was YOUR year. You came into this company and made yourself into the biggest star in the industry, all at my expense. You did things to me that no one has ever succeeded in doing. You have broken me, beaten me, humbled me and humiliated me. 2006 was your year. I'll call a spade a spade and admit that. But NOW, that was last year, you see, and this year we are going to start things RIGHT! Because Bruce Blank, I come out here tonight asking you for one more shot, one more try, ONE MORE MATCH! ME AND YOU BRUCE, LET'S DO IT! The fans roar, wanting to see Malibu vanquish his most hated foe once and for all. Malibu waits on a response, and it's just a matter of minutes before Bruce comes strolling through the curtain and down to the ring. COLE This is one rivalry that cannot be contained, and has no end in sight! COACH Malibu's looking to end it, but everytime we think he can, he comes up short. Bruce Blank is the toughest bastard that Malibu has ever had to deal with! Bruce climbs up into the ring, and now the two men who hate each other oh so much are eye to eye. BLANK You want one more shot at me, boy? Malibu nods his head, and the fans pick up on the request. "ONE MORE MATCH!" "ONE MORE MATCH!" "ONE MORE MATCH!" BLANK You people wanna see it too, huh? You want to see the biggest feud of 2006 again in 2007? The fans roar, continuing the "One More Match" chant. BLANK WELL YOU'RE NOT GONNA GET IT! Now the fans boo loudly, and Malibu looks into Blank's eyes, waiting for his reasoning. BLANK You see, Zachary, you just said it yourself a few minutes ago. 2007 is the time to start over. A clean slate and a fresh start. I am DONE with you, boy! I had my fun. I beat your ass at Angleslam. I beat your ass on national television and made you shake my hand out of respect! I bloodied you at every damn turn, I had one of my boys put your best friend in the hospital, and I walked right into your house and up to your two closest, dearest loved ones and scare the ever-lovin' God out of them! So you tell me, Zack, what do I have to gain by letting you come at me again? I have proven myself superior. I have humbled you, boy. You got nothin' left. Start 2007 off right. Start it off with somethin' you know you can handle. Maybe then, you'll regain some of the lost respect from this crowd, because you and I both know you ain't been the same since it became apparent that you're not a superhero anymore. You can't always get the big win, my friend. Sometimes you have to deal with the fact that the villain is the greater of the two! You have to come to terms, Zack...and I know it's gonna be hard on ya...but you have to come to terms with the fact that I am BETTER than you. Blank stuffs the microphone into Zack's chest and turns to walk away, but Zack spins him around. MALIBU I can admit that I can't seem to get a win over you, Blank. I can admit that you have beaten me worse than anyone that came before you. But I will never admit that you're a better man than me, and I'll never admit that I respect you, because I don't. What you did not only to me, but to my family and my friends, it burns in my heart. It fills my head. It keeps me from sleeping at night, and I can't get past you. YOU did this to me, and now you want to walk away? You ask what I have to give, to offer you, to make it worth your while. Well then you listen to me, you son of a bitch. 2007 is going to be a clean slate, and a fresh start. For the OAOAST, it's going to be a fresh start without one of us. How does that sound? The fans sit back in silence. COLE What did he just say!? A smile starts to creep across Blank's face. BLANK What are you gettin' at, boy? MALIBU I think you know. I think you all know. I want one more shot at you, Blank. I want total redemption for everything you've put me through. I am willing to do the unthinkable to get you in the ring one last time, Bruce. Zack Malibu and Bruce Blank, one final time...and if you beat me, Bruce...if you prove that you truly are the better man and beat me again...I will leave the OAOAST FOREVER. COLE WHAT!? NO! Zack, don't do it! BLANK Forever? MALIBU Forever. No retirement from in-ring competition just to go sit in the office. I mean totally and completely, Bruce. As a wrestler, as a referee, as an executive, as a road agent...I will go so far as to never attend an event as a paying customer, if you will give me what I want, Bruce. I know full well I'm at your mercy, but I know what you're thinking. You're too proud not to take this offer. You want me gone, Bruce. You want me out of your life as much as I want you out of mine. SO LET'S MAKE IT ALL OR NOTHING~! Career versus career, Malibu versus Blank... BLANK IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT? The fans roar, and Malibu looks at Blank like he's not backing down. BLANK Boy, you're certifiably crazy, because you just signed your damn death warrant. MALIBU I told you, Blank, I'd do whatever it takes to rid you from my life, and if this is what it comes down to, so be it. You did cut me off in mid-sentence though, because there was one more thing I was going to say. BLANK Oh yeah, what's that, hero? The only thing you better be sayin' is goodbye, because you're not long for this world. MALIBU Actually, that's not what I was going to say. Because I feel that a match of this magnitude, should be dealt with strictly between you and I, don't you? No Wildcards, No Hooligans, no nobody getting in our way. BLANK I don't need nobody gettin' in my way this time. I'm gonna enjoy the sweetness of this all on my own. MALIBU I'm glad you feel that way, Bruce, because we're doing this without worrying about any of that. We're doing this with nothing to come between us, just four walls of metal around us...a metal ceiling above us, and no way for anyone to get inside or out. COACH Mikey Cole, does he mean... COLE I think so, Coach. BLANK You want a cage match? Boy, you know what happens to you when you're in a cage with me! MALIBU It's not just a cage match, Bruce. It's more than win or lose, do or die. For you and me, it's SURVIVE OR SURRENDER~! The fans EXPLODE~! We've only seen one of them before, back when Zack Malibu lost the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title to Crystal at Angleslam 2004! BLANK Survive or Surrender, eh Zacky? Boy, you're stupider than I thought. MALIBU I might be desperate, Bruce, but I'm hardly stupid. I'm willing to get rid of you at any cost. BLANK The only thing this stunt is gonna cost you, is your entire reason for being. Blank again shoves the mic back to Zack, then turns to walk away, leaving Malibu alone in the ring to ponder his thoughts. COLE What a blockbuster announcement...Zack Malibu has just put his career in the OAOAST, his life in wrestling, in Bruce Blank's hands! COACH Desperate times call for desperate measures, Cole. COLE Zack hasn't won a match against Bruce yet, and in the only Survive Or Surrender match in OAOAST history, he came out on the losing end of that as well! What is going through the mind of Zack Malibu? COACH You wanna try reasoning with him? He ain't gonna listen to me! Just as the fans are done getting over the shocking announcement they've just heard, the camera fades into a black screen. The following words appear on screen in big white blocky letters: THE LIGHTNING CREW NEW YEAR'S EVE PARTY DECEMBER 31, 2006 Yes folks, for the FOURTH time tonight, we return to The Lightning Crew's New Year's Eve party. And like always, "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Royds is playing on a loop. The camera cuts to a clock that has the time as 11:56 p.m. The camera pans the lavish hotel room. Pizza boxes are scattered about, as are beer cans. Two bottles of champagne lie on the table next to the leather sofa. Stephen Joseph Popick is quite obviously drunk, stumbling around the room with a lamp shade on his head and a glass of champagne in his right hand. Popick makes goofy noises while Thomas Rodriguez watches and shakes his head. Mr. Boricua is drinking from yet another beer keg, despite there already being two other beer kegs in the room. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez is talking to "Eminem" and "Paris Hilton" holding a glass of champagne in her right hand. "Will Ferrell" and "Robert De Niro" are talking to each other next to the window. Cuban Wall sits on the leather sofa watching Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve while Vitamin X and "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican (also drunk himself) talk to Stacey Robertson. PRL holds up a contract while talking to Stacey, who looks pretty uncomfortable right about now. "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION" THA PUERTO RICAN (Slurring) I'm telling ya, I'm telling ya Stacey. You're missing out...missing out on the oppotun--oppotun--the chance of a lifetime! Why waste the rest of your life hanging out with that HACK....when you could join up with the best and brightest and join The Lightning Crew? VITAMIN X Yeah, Stacey. The Lightning Crew is going places in 2007! With Tha Puerto Rican leading us, there's no telling what we can do! CUBAN WALL Stacey, Puerto watches out for us. With Tha Puerto Rican on our side, we've got health insurance, dental insurance, movies, TV deals. I mean, I'm no actor. In fact, I'm probably the worst actor in the history of Hollywood whose name isn't Rob Scheinder. I've got no acting ability, but I've got movie deals up the ying-yang! I've got four movies I'm going to film next year! I would have never gotten this far if it wasn't for The Lightning Crew, and if it wasn't for PRL! So, think about what PRL is offering you right here. Think about it. PRL Yeah. *Burp!* Think about it. Here, take this. PR hands Stacey Robertson the contract. PRL This is a contract to join The Lightning Crew. Read it over, and let us know...let us know your response. Yeah, I know that you have to go back to Colombian Heat tomorrow, but still, think about it. Because you can either be consumed by the fire, or be part of the power. Stacey looks at the contract. She holds the contract with her right hand and her tiara with her left. Even though she's been miserable with The Lightning Crew since Thursday, the fact that she actually reads the contract must surely be a sign that something's up. MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ You guys, the countdown's about to start! The New Year is almost here! PRL Alllllllllllright! PRL gets off the sofa. Vitamin X brushes Stacey's hair, taking a second to smell it, and then goes back to brushing it. X turns her head over to him. VITAMIN X Think about it, won't you? He too gets off the sofa. Stacey continues reading over the contract. Thomas Rodriguez props himself onto the sofa next to Cuban Wall. He's wearing one of those goofy Happy New Year hats and blowing a noisemaker. After blowing it for a full minute, Cuban Wall can't take it anymore and pulls it away from Thomas and breaks it! CUBAN WALL Enough! Wall throws the broken noisemaker on the ground. He goes back to watching TV. Thomas looks at Cuban Wall like a sad puppy, and then watches TV himself, arms folded, with a sourpuss look on his face. Stacey watches all of this. THOMAS RODRIGUEZ Meanie. The camera pans over to PRL (also wearing a stupid Happy New Year hat in blue), Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez, Mr. Boricua, Stephen Joseph Popick, Vitamin X, "Eminem", "Paris Hilton", "Robert De Niro", and "Will Ferrell" all standing up watching the ball drop in Times Square. Confetti is thrown and horns are blown as the countdown continues. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and PRL lead the countdown as it gets to the final seconds. EVERYONE 10! 9! 8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1! HAPPY NEW YEAR! Everbody except Cuban Wall and Stacey Robertson celebrates. "Auld Lyne Sang" is sung by mostly everybody despite nobody knowing all the words. PRL and Lindsay kiss. Vitamin X and Thomas Rodriguez pop two champagne bottles and pour some in everyone's cups. Mr. Boricua and Stephen Joseph Popick (who has taken off the lamp shade on his head) have their arms around each other's shoulders and glasses of champagne in their hands as they sing "Auld Lyne Sang" quite loudly. Actually, "singing" wouldn't be the right word for it. More like "yelling incoherently to the tune of 'Auld Lyne Sang'" would be much better. POPICK I LOVE YOU ALL! HAPPY NEW YEAR! Lindsay throws up confetti in the air. PRL blows a horn. Lindsay then walks over and turns on the stereo to a salsa and merengue radio station. PRL and Thomas Rodriguez start (badly) dancing. Popick does the Funky Chicken. PRL All right! Now we've got a party up in here! YEAH-UH~! MR. BORICUA GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! The Lightning Crew's "celebrity" guests chat it up with The Lightning Crew. Vitamin X interrupts PRL's "dancing". VITAMIN X P.R., can I ask you something? PUERTO RICAN Ummm...yeah, X. What's up? Vitamin X puts his left arm around PRL's shoulders and walks with him a few steps away from the festivities, but quite close to the camera. VX speaks in a low voice to P.R.L. VX Uh...PR...I would like to....uh....go with Stacey to someplace...alone. Just the two of us. I want to...get to know her better. PRL Ahhhh. I know what you mean. You dirty dog, you! Here, take this. PRL reaches into his left pants pocket...and pulls out a condom. He hands the condom over to X. PRL You gotta be safe, you know what I mean? VX Yeah, I know it. Thanks, man. VX puts the condom in his right pants pocket. He nods his head. PR does the same. VX walks over to Stacey. VITAMIN X Say Stacey, can we go somewhere for a minute? STACEY ROBERTSON Uhhh... PRL Come on Stacey! Do it for The X-Man! STACEY Uhhh...okay....okay. Vitamin X grabs Stacey by her left hand and takes her off of the sofa. He takes her by the hand out of the hotel room, stopping to give PRL a thumbs up as he walks away. PRL gives X a wink and a thumbs up as he leaves. Stacey has taken her tiara and contract with her. PRL Have fun, you two! Stay safe! *Sigh* I love those kids. Vitamin X and Stacey Robertson have left the hotel room. PRL goes back to drinking his glass of champagne. The Lightning Crew, Stephen Joseph Popick, and their "guests" continue dancing, drinking, and gabbing about as the stereo blasts salsa and merengue. PRL I love this party! PRL drinks some more champagne. He goes back to the sofa where Cuban Wall, Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez and Stephen Joseph Popick are at. PR and Popick's HI-YAH World Tag Team Championship belts rest on the top of the sofa. They are all having a good time when-- "STACEY? STACEY!? STACEY!" COLOMBIAN HEAT is heard outside the hotel room. Colombian Heat bursts in through the door, angry and looking for Stacey Robertson. COLOMBIAN HEAT Stacey! STACEY!!! STACEY!!! WHERE ARE YOU!? YO, STACEY!!! STACEY!!! WHERE ARE YOU!?!?!?!? STACEY!!! The party has come to a stop. Everyone watches Colombian Heat search for his girlfriend. The music has been turned off, but "No Chance In Hell" continues playing. HEAT STACEY! STACE--STACEY! Colombian Heat can't find her anywhere. He then spots PRL sitting on the sofa. Furious, Heat rushes up to him! HEAT WHERE IS SHE!? WHERE IS SHE YOUSE SON OF A BI-ATCH~!? Colombian Heat grabs PRL by his vest and starts shaking him! Cuban Wall, Mr. Boricua, and Stephen Joseph Popick come in and break it up. They pull Heat away from PRL, who just dusts his vest off. Colombian Heat tries to break free, but can't. HEAT LET GO OF ME! LET GO OF ME! LET GO! Boricua, Wall, and Popick pull Colombian Heat a few feet away from Tha Puerto Rican. PR's "guests", Thomas Rodriguez, and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez just stand there and watch all of this. PRL Let him stay. Let him stay. Mr. Boricua, Cuban Wall, and Stephen Joseph hold Colombian Heat where he is so that PRL can talk to him. COLOMBIAN HEAT WHERE IS SHE? I'M NOT KIDDING, DAWG! WHERE IS SHE? PRL Relax, Heat. Relax. Stacey's safe and sound. HEAT GIVE HER BACK TO ME! IT'S NEW YEAR'S DAY NOW! SHE'S GOTTA GO HOME NOW! PRL You'll get her back tomorrow morning! But for now, Stacey's gone. She's left the hotel and is with Vitamin X, and for all I know they'll probably end up in a motel somewhere in this city doing who knows what. This comment only serves to infuriate Colombian Heat more. HEAT YOU BASTARD! GIVE HER BACK TO ME! SHE'S MAH GIRL! I WANT HER BACK! PRL Heat, you'll get her back tomorrow! Relax. Calm down. Don't worry, Vitamin X uses protection. HEAT YOUSE SON OF A BITCH! PRL laughs manically. Colombian Heat tries to fight free. PRL just tells his men to let Heat go. Heat just stands there and looks at PRL straight in the eye. COLOMBIAN HEAT I's want a match! A match against you! PRL Against me? You're sure about that, Heat? COLOMBIAN HEAT Yeah, son! I want to beat your bitch ass all over tha ring! PRL You wanna fight me? You really want to fight me? Okay Heat, tell you what I'm gonna do. This Thursday on HeldDOWN~!, we'll have a match. A No Disqualifcation Match! And if I win, then Stacey Robertson becomes PROPERTY of The Lightning Crew! HEAT What? Yo, that iz crazy! What'cha thinking!? Stacey ain't no piece of meat! CUBAN WALL You rapper guys treat girls like pieces of meat all the time! PRL Wall, this is not the time for one of your anti-rap comments. (Turns back to Heat) Listen...listen, here is why you'll want to accept this match. BECAUSE, IF you win...then Vitamin X must stay 500 FEET away from Stacey Robertson at all times! COLOMBIAN HEAT 500 feet? PRL At all times. COLOMBIAN HEAT You mean like a restraining order or somethin'? PRL Yeah, pretty much. Colombian Heat thinks this over. He takes a deep breath, puts his hands on his face, and then turns back around. COLOMBIAN HEAT Okay. I's accept. PRL Good. Good. See you Thursday, Heat! HEAT Better watch out, Puerto! Cuz this Thursday night, yo' ass iz mine, bitch! PRL And I'll see to it that no ass is yours this Thursday, Heat! Ta-ta for now! COLOMBIAN HEAT Get away from me! Bitch. Heat bumps his right shoulder against Popick's right shoulder as he walks out. Heat mutters to himself as he walks out of the lavish hotel room. The camera turns back to Tha Puerto Rican. THA PUERTO RICAN Well what is everyone staring at!? We've still got a party to continue! Come on everybody! Let's get CRUNK~! POPICK GET YO' FREAK ON, EVERRYBODY! NOW EVERRYBODY IN THE ROOM GET TIPSY~! Lindsay Gonzalez turns the stereo back on, this time to a hip-hop/R&B radio station. Everyone goes back to partying. PRL drinks from his glass of champagne. Popick badly dances. Cuban Wall goes back to watching TV, changing the channel to MTV's New Year's Eve celebration. Mr. Boricua drinks from ANOTHER beer keg. Thomas Rodriguez pours himself another glass of champagne. Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez talks to "Paris Hilton", "Eminem", "Will Ferrell", and "Robert De Niro" (who moves away from his black dot for one second, revealing that it's a young man with black hair who looks nothing at all like the famous actor). The camera zooms in on "The Corporate Champion" Tha Puerto Rican having another drink, a cocky smirk on his face. This is the last image we see because the camera cuts to another black screen. The following words appear on screen in big white blocky letters as "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Royds ends: HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM ALL OF US HERE IN THE LIGHTNING CREW! "THE CORPORATE CHAMPION" THA PUERTO RICAN (Voiceover) THE CHAMP HAS SPO-KUN~!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Commercial break