Nighthawk

No. I do have some fine attire, which I will wear to special occasions, but my standard "going out" wear is jeans and a t shirt. Granted, I do have some pretty volatile shirts, several of which contain profanity (the best are probably one with a picture of Jerry Falwell and the caption "Rest in shit, motherfucker." and the back has his dates of birth and death and the quote "If you are not a born again Christian, you are a failure as a human being.", and one which says "Yes, I'm wearing this goddamn shirt in front of your fucking kids." Every single shirt I own has gotten comments from strangers, but those seem to get it most.) When I go on stage, I pay pretty much no attention to what I wear. Since I got a couple tattoos, I usually go without a shirt, but even before than, it meant nothing. I'd typically do shows straight from work and just wear whatever I had to wear at work. Shirt and tie, polo with company logo on the breast, whatever. I guess I do actively try to wear the least expected thing. So in that sense, clothes sort of make the man. But I think it's more, "The man makes the clothes." As an aside to that, I really love cursing. If I end up with kids, I will teach them to swear terribly. You know, make them good in every other way, but just with a filthy mouth. Like, somebody says "Little girl, you can't skip rope here." and she goes "Fuck off, cunt!" And I hope I get called to school with "Uh, we regret to inform you, but little Slayer called his teacher a motherfucker." so I can say "What the fuck's wrong with that?" It's no worse than peepee head. Seriously. Just like in Harry Potter, fear of a name only increases fear of the thing itself. Patton Oswalt: "I'm going to shoot my goof juice in your hoo hah!" is infinitely more creepy than "I'm going to shoot cum in your pussy." While I think they're a load of bitches, I do admire their independence. I watch every single hood movie that comes out, and Baby Boy is seriously underrated. Tyrese is calling this one girl as a booty call, and she's like "Nigga, who the fuck you think you is? If I want some dick, I'ma call you!" and just hangs up the phone. That's awesome. Also, the time I got lost in Harlem at one in the morning, I saw this chick (dressed like a whore, mind you) just walking down the street. And these dudes were like "Hey beautiful, what's up?" and she turned on these dudes and was like "Fuck you nigga! How the fuck you think you can say that shit to me..." and on and on and she turned these guys out. Completely. Over "Hey beautiful." Not "Hey bitch." That is pretty awesome. I've dated a few of those hood rats, and I'm not ashamed to admit I can't handle them. More civilized black girls, I like, though. As amazing as it is, in this day and age, in San Francisco, people still get pissed off seeing a white guy with a black girl. Which I of course take as an opportunity to flagrantly make out with them and grope them, which enrages the old white people even further. Also, a lot of these girls really wouldn't tolerate me doing that if it wasn't to educate old racist people. Double points.

Yes! I can't believe I forgot him. Also Keith Moon. Now that Steve-O did a rap album, I can say him. I'm actually looking forward to listening to it. I think he has an interesting voice. Also, some people seem to do a lot of weird shit, but are by all appearances quite sane. They just seem to like it. I guess they qualify as "screwed up". Here I think of El Duce. Although he did get drunk and get hit by a train. And was apparently approached to kill Kurt Cobain. Yeah, he was nuts. There was a local band in Tampa called Hell On Earth and they'd do shit like put rats in a blender and fuck dead cows on stage. They couldn't really leave the state. That's why a lot of wrestling goes on in Florida, too. It's relatively easy to get away with crazy shit. Yoko Ono's pretty far gone, too.

You're both gay? That is part of it, actually.

Also, how did anybody think they were going to go gay at the end? Haven't you ever gotten totally drunk and told your friend you love them? Like, "No seriously. I love you. No, you don't understand what this means. I love you." That's not gay at all, it's just sweet. I do that all the time.

First, jerking off is better than sex in many ways. There's no expectations. No disapointments. No one judges you. You can do all kinds of weird shit in your head that you never get to in real life. Secondly, I will not get back with an ex. I just don't do it. I tell them up front "You get one chance with Dave. Do not break up with me to make me jealous or some shit, because that'll be it. I'm gone." And yeah, I've broken my rule once or twice. Ends in ten kinds of wrong sewn into a ball and slammed through the hoop of atrocity. But it's love that makes people do that, sure, and comfort. It's not hard to be in a relationship with someone you already have been. You don't have to relearn a new set of quirks. People remember the good times, and they're like "Why couldn't we do that again?" and they get back together and it's like "Oh yeah. That's why." I can get over pretty much anything, I was recently having a discussion about which comic book character I was most like in a relationship (yes, I was really having that discussion), and the answer is Wolverine. Crass, take no shit, and gets over anything instantly. I can work through anything. But break up? No. That's forever.

Yeah, I guess it's more the legend of Robert Johnson. Still, the bit about him foaming at the mouth and saying the devil was after him is good stuff. He Who Cannot Be Named is a wife beating alcoholic. That sucks, but it's not really crazy. Still, all the Dwarves are at least a little crazy. There's a fine line between crazy and drug addict, too. I mean, drugs'll make anybody crazy. Should I be mentioning James Brown? Or Rick James? Iggy Pop is good, though he's ok now. He was crazy and a drug addict.

It is a classic. It's our generation's Fast Times. Fuck American Pie. However, and I know I will be in an extreme minority, Hot Rod was funnier. Superbad had heart and shit, and taught you things about yourself, and was a better movie, but Hot Rod seriously almost killed me.

Seriously, you could show me that and ask which celebrity it is, and I'd get to six or seven before I got it. Speaking of giant wigs and drugs... have fun: http://www.cracked.com/index.php?name=News&sid=880

She looks like a totally different person.

He was in Mayhem. He was Count Grischnacht. After he killed Euronymous, Euronymous' mother went to Hellhammer, and said "Look, as a show of respect to our family, please mix out all of that guy's bass tracks." And Hellhammer said "Yes, I totally will." and completely didn't, not as a show of disrespect or whatever, he just had no idea how. That's pretty awesome. Hellhammer also ate part of Dead's brain and made a necklace out of his skull fragments. METAL! This thread rules, by the way. I hadn't heard of half of the people being mentioned.

So after getting told about Hasil Adkins recently, and also Richie James of the Manic Street Preachers, who I had heard of, but never knew there was a total psycho in the band, I discovered that there are crazy people I don't know about. I should be listening to them. So this thread is to talk about totally insane people who are also in music. I will eventually compile it into a Sgt. Pepper's style album cover. So there's: GG Allin Roky Erickson Hasil Adkins I'd say pretty much all the classic lineup of Mayhem. Jon Nodtveidt (Dissection... he killed a guy) I guess we can say Jim Morrison and Nick Drake Kurt Cobain, probably... you know, all the suicides. Nah, let's get really crazy again... Charlie Manson (his album is legitimately good. Try it.) Scratch Perry Joe Meek Phil Spector Robert Johnson Who else?

I actually support wearing weird, weird shit for no reason (I have a collection), but I think teachers should look completely normal. It's comforting.

Man, I just realized something cool. I've totally isolated a ton of girls... but they will talk to you if you play the "I'm a god damned human being!" card. I told them "Look, I may have done these things, but I'm still a person! I feel, just like you do, and it hurts me when you don't talk to me. I'm just a human being, like you, I'm not an animal, and I get lonely. Just say hi once in a while. It means a lot to me." And they're like "Ok, sorry I'm so mean to you, David, but you honestly do act like an asshole all the time." And I say "Look, I'm sorry, I won't anymore. I really just want to be your friend, but nobody understands me, and I want attention, so I sometimes act a fool." And they get it. I mean, all those thing I just said are true, don't just lie... but this vulnerability thing really works. Try telling the truth. It fucking works. Like "My name is George. I'm unemployed and I live with my parents." truth. It's just so different that it gets responses.

Oh fuck, shrooms and dxm are the ultimate drug combo. This is going to be awesome for you. Just please don't turn into Jingus.

Hey, it's not just me. I have multiple friends who are the same as me and they had no idea about it either. We'll get to know each other, researching this man.

This is an obscure one, and I likely won't get helped, but I'll throw it out there. On Patton Oswalt's new album Werewolves and Lollipops there's a bit about him idolizing really crazy, screwed up musicians, and he mentions Roky Erickson and GG Allin, who I know, and one other person. I can't even really understand what he's saying. It sounds like Hazzel Atkins, but I have no idea who that is and it gives me no search results, so that's likely not it. Any idea?

Shrooms are great because they're a psychedelic but you can still basically function on them. Probably the best was the time I hallucinated that I was inside the movie James and the Giant Peach. I was on some other stuff, but I think that was the primary thing. That movie's a trip anyway, and that was just great. I kind of fell in love with the spider in the movie during that trip, and then when it was over (the movie, not the trip), I went on aim and told Leena that I was in love with her. I was sort of confusing her with the spider, because they were both foreign. It's true that I think Leena's awesome, but a lot of it's probably residuals from a drug trip where I thought she was a spider. Still, we were good enough friends before that that I could say something like that and she would take it at face value. Recently I was discussing with a friend of mine my associations of certain drugs with different locations. Like, coke: night club, weed: rap concert, meth: somebody's basement, and so on. Mushrooms was the desert. He was sort of surprised, but that was my usual MO. When I was going to do mushrooms, I'd go out into the desert, or when I moved to Florida, the swamp, and take them and just sit there introspectively. I learned some amazing things. Hey pbone, if you read this, I remember you talking to me about wanting psychedelic experiences, and that's my advice. Go out into nature and take mushrooms and just sit there. You live in Hawaii, there's so many places with amazing scenery. I don't do drugs anymore, but I would probably consider doing mushrooms again if I was in a position to stare into a volcano, or I was in the Himalayas or Antarctica or something.

Let's all recall Rick James licking girls faces from the Dave Chappelle sketch. In the extended interview, though, he admits it was usually a girl he knew and he was just fucking with Charlie. Of course, that's only the way he remembers it. Cocaine's a helluva drug. I should try this.

Do all of those things. Just the other day I had been up all night and had to go out at four AM to talk to some guy about a job. I had to drive into San Francisco, and I looked at the gauge and said "Shit. I gotta get gas." So I did, and at the gas station, I was like "Hm, this seems familiar. Why do I feel like I used to stop here every day..." Before realizing that I did indeed stop there every day, buy an energy drink and get cash back to pay the toll on the bridge. I would have totally forgotten and been fined $100. Actually I probably would have parked the car and gone walking back to the cars behind me begging money. But that's not pleasant either. But the point is, I know all about chugging Rock Stars at four in the morning with the AC on full blast and the window down. Van Halen or Aerosmith work well.

Of course we do, what the fuck are you talking about?

Me? Well, of course I would. But if you notice, a lot of those girls did laugh.

Oh, lighten up.

That's more difficult, particularly when you exclude anything I was involved in. A lot of stuff doesn't stand the test of time, and a lot of the stuff I call great, I love because it's terrible. I must say though, I did always like Metal Ed, and that's still funny. Also: Leena's body. Go for it. There's stores here... they hover somewhere between thrift stores and vintage clothing store. Most of the stuff there is thrift storishly priced, but they are still able to get people to drop $80 on an original KISS tour shirt. The point is, there's a market for it. You'll make your investment back at the very least. As an aside, I really love those stores. I've been able to pick up a shirt from the first season of American Idol for $8, and some decent 80s era Bowie and Elton John shirts in the $20 range. They also have cool shit like staff jackets for airlines that don't exist anymore and girl scout sashes (yes, I could accessorize that).

Zombie film. It's the easiest to get made, but it's a saturated market. None of them are original ideas, but with zombie films it doesn't matter. Regarding the two chicks: Carly. Course nothing says you can't pursue both. There's no ring on your finger. Probably Frigid deleting the other board, or Jingus becoming addicted to cough medicine. Politics. My penis. Regarding older women, meh. I mean, I agree in a sense, but I currently know an 18 year old girl going out with a 15 year old guy and a 22 year old with a 17 year old. And that's just right now. It happens. It's more that the girls suck than that the guys are so great.

A lot of them were. The kind of girls I like sort of lends itself to this. I like really slutty girls, so that's obvious (I've had to tear myself away from that a little, too). I also like sort of alternative girls, you know, weird hair and tattoos and shit. They're sort of more tolerant of that sort of thing. Plus, you know, I had my band. Rock stars are the most fucked up people in the world, they get laid all the time. I wasn't a rock star, but you know, I was cool. Plus, I could still talk about interesting things. And a lot of girls like to party, too. So that's all elements of a guy who should be able to get girls, it's just... I'm a complete addict, I mean, c'mon, have a little respect for yourself. Funny anecdote, the absolute hottest girl I currently know would beer bong whiskey. I'd still fuck her. I guess that's true all over. I mean, I won't fuck her, cause she's my friend. And she doesn't do that sort of stuff anymore anyway. Still drinks a lot, though. Maybe she thought you felt too strongly for her, for just a friend. And you probably did, truth told. But she sent incredibly mixed signals. You want my honest opinion... fuck that girl. She was mean to you. There were better ways to handle the situation. Like, not break up with a guy and then still be his girlfriend for all intents and purposes for four more months. That's just fucking with somebody's head. And you really can't be friends with somebody like that unless you're a very unique individual. Like Seinfeld. If you're going to though, because I know it's easy to crack, wait until you move. Then she'll at least know you don't want more. Would also be good to get a new girlfriend yourself, either way. Will let you know whether you really want her as a friend or not. And if you did talk to her, it would say something to her that you had one. Seriously though, move on. I know this isn't a question, but I thought I'd point out that as surprising as it may be, I'm incredibly shy. I overcompensate. As a lifestyle. That may also be why I meet my serious girlfriends on the internet. In that form, I can talk like a normal person and don't feel the need to be the brazen loudmouth that I usually am. I act normal with my friends too, but they've told me I take some getting used to. The serious girlfriends I didn't meet online, I was friends with first. I'm hesitant about this, though, because I don't want to lose them as friends. I am one of those Seinfeld motherfuckers who can be friends afterwards without giving a shit, but sometimes they aren't.