Nighthawk

If I were eating them with plain bread, I'd toast it first.

I've been fired a lot. I really don't think it's that big a deal, but then I've never had what you could really call a career until lately. For various shit like not shaving (that was more of me quitting, though), making the people training me fear for their life (a driving job) and calling a coworker a dumb bitch, fun stuff like that.

Oh yeah, I totally knew that. It relates too, because if I had a daughter her name would be Pagan. I really saw a little girl named Pagan once, and I tell people and they're like "Are you sure it wasn't Megan?" and I'm like "No, it was seriously Pagan." And it was. Those're my kids, Slayer and Pagan. I will compromise slightly on Slayer. I will accept Christian Slayer McLaughlin, and then you can call him Chris and pretend he doesn't have the awesomest name ever. But it's Pagan all the way for a girl.

Oh, by the way... .luke-o has horse teeth .Jingus is a cough syrup addict... let me say that again. .Jingus is a cough syrup addict .and Matt Young was in love with a stupid whore. I mean, I am too, but not like him. In fact, no I'm not. I love stupid whores, but I'm not in love with them I'm going to try something here, based on another thread. The original list, and who's real first names I know. .CWM - David .Banky - Jeff .Agent - Gene .Inc - Matt .Edwin - Paul .Frigid Soul - Adam .Kotz - Patrick .Carnival - Ethan, but only because I heard Leena say it. .Zack Malibu - ok, I'm digging on this one... Chris? .Marney - I would actually be very interested in. From what I know of her, I would guess Patty or Selma. .Leena - Aliana. I think something like that. It's a pretty name. I really feel bad that our relationship went sour, I really liked her. But not sexually. Sort of like Yuna_Firerose. Ok, we constantly had cybersex. But it wasn't important. .Rant - Josh And that's it. Nothing weird. Let's take it upon ourselves to give any children we have weird names. I'm one hundred percent committed to naming my first born son Slayer. It has nothing to do with the poster, but he can pretend it does.

I legitimately laughed out loud. First time since 2004, that wasn't at one of my own posts.

After making people afraid that I would die again, I'm not going to ever drink again, so my planned ramblings won't happen, unfortunately. I will remain, as Vanhalen says, on fire, though, probably from having cigarettes put out on me. About once a year I get so drunk I don't know what's what, and do some crazy shit, and make people think I'm going to die. It keeps me sober. This was it for this year.

We share a name! He doesn't suck!

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Thank you, Vanhalen, from the bottom of my heart. I really and truly appreciate all of my fans.

Yeah, you actually did it for real. That was the real thread where nothing happens. I actually did want to say things in this thread, though. I just need to drink more, and then I will.

Inc's real name is Matt Dutto. These are the poster's whose real, full names I know. Inc: Matt Dutto Agent: Gene Simmons Silverman Kotz: Patrick Spoon And that's actually it. I know a lot of first names, but that's all, except for like, Matt Young or some shit, but that's obvious. I am David McLaughlin. You should send me money in the mail, like that one guy did.

That was a pretty good thread, twiztedmind, but who exactly did you love? TSM in general? I also love them. But that thread deserves more. There's a lot I could say about how I love this place if I wanted to. Also, you see all that stuff I just said? Nothing is happening, still. So it's ok.

They got the house for free over this sick compulsion society has to reward people for breeding, I'm sure. We're not repopulating after the Flood anymore, keep your god damn legs together.

Can I just openly say I hope a piece of falling satellite falls on the house and kills every one of them? That doesn't make me evil, does it?

I'm currently trying to talk them into letting you join, Czeck, both drunk and sober. And then it kind of veered into me talking about crazy things I did while drunk. But it ain't me, if you don't get that invite!

Also, looking at my posts from years ago... it's crazy how much I claim to not remember. I still drink a lot but I also remember shit which happened years ago. What the fuck was I doing back then? Answer? Anything you put in front of me. I'm amazed I was so popular as a poster. I was a wreck as a person. Everyone loved that, though, so I guess it's not that surprising.

Runing it? Michael Myers in Halloween 6! Samhain!

Related question: what will it mean to you if the board croaks? I probably wouldn't outright buy it, but I would be sad.

As much as I hate you guys, I go on record as posting here for the rest of my life, as long as there's a board to post at. I'm a grown man with a good life and I still post here and it's ok. I'm past the "It's temporary." phase.

You're ruining it.

That would be good.

You're not sure why? How about because I'm the awesomest person ever and I said you were ok with me? How's that for why?

Czeck, you kickstart my heart. Sorry for all that awful shit I said about you at the secret board for stupid jerks. And happy birthday, thuganomics! Shine on... you crazy asshole.

God I love GG Allin. Amazing interview. That man was a genius. I mean, say what you will about him, but people who call him an idiot clearly never paid attention to what he said when he was sober. I mean, you already know that he is my personal hero, but I really feel like I don't do enough to promote him to people. Then I tell myself "Dude, you got a tattoo of his face, that's pretty fucking serious." And I say "Yeah, you're right, me, it is." It kind of sucks how down to earth he was, though. I could have legitimately hung out with him if we were alive at the same time and I wasn't ten years old.

I've found that in real life, I'm mostly called David again. It fluctuates because I honestly don't give the slightest shit which one you call me. I say "Dave" because it's one syllable shorter.