Phoenix Fury Legdrop

::A deep, slow voiced man saids "LIGHTNING CREW". The AngleTron lights up with an image of Tha Puerto Rican on it. The crowd boos the moment his face is shown. The image of a smiling P.R. changes to another image of P.R. raising the Puerto Rican Championship belt after a match. The crowd continues booing waiting for Tha Puerto Rican to show up. As the AngleTron shows image after image of P.R., music is being played in the background. The music is slow and mellow sounding like the opening to a classical song. A man whispers the words "Chance" throughout the opening. On the AngleTron, the image changes to an image of Tha Puerto Rican choked up. Follow by P.R. being very very angry. Follow by Tha Puerto Rican crying. Finally, the last image is of Tha Puerto Rican smiling in a psychotic matter. The music swells, the crescendo hits, the AngleTron switches to a waving Puerto Rico flag with, in big white blocky letters, LIGHTNING CREW appearing in front of it. A lightning bolt hits the entrance. Fog fills up the entrance as "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Boyds begins playing.:: Jonathon “The Coach” Coachman: LOOK OUT BELOW!!! Caboose: Oh please. It was just pyro going off. You don’t have to pee in your pants over it! Coachman: Too late. Michael Cole: Moving right along, it looks like Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are coming out here for their match coming up next. *No Chance (No Chance) That’s what ya got! (Ha, Ha, Yeah!) We’re up against No machine too strong Pussy politicians Buying souls for us are…PUPPETS!!! (Puppets!)* ::The Lightning Crew entrance video plays on the AngleTron as the crowd boos waiting for P.R. to arrive. They chant "P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!":: Cole: P.R. and Heat have had some problems over the past few weeks, stemming from what happened at AngleMania III back in March where Colombian Heat hit P.R. in the head with a chair causing him to lose the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship to The Mad Cappa. Coachman: Not only that, but PROTOTYPE: The PERFECT Lightning Crew Member, left The Lightning Crew 2 weeks ago. PROTOTYPE was the creation of Tha Puerto Rican, and it really hit him hard that PROTOTYPE turned his back on him in something right out of Frankenstein. Caboose: I see no reason to worry. Friends have spats every once in a while. There is nothing to worry about. What they should be doing is concentrate on getting the Puerto Rican Championship back from The Mad CRAPPA! They should use all their energy to make sure Tha Puerto Rican defeats Mad Cappa and wins back the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship. ::Finally, Tha Puerto Rican steps through the fog and smoke and the flickering lights, and smiles evilly. Colombian Heat, wearing his sweatsuit and clock around his neck, follows him. Heat dances and jumps up and down getting the crowd hyped up. He does several gang signs and grabs his testicles, sneering at the crowd. The crowd boos P.R. and Heat loudly, chanting "P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!" but P.R. and Heat do not listen. Tha Puerto Rican asks Heat if he is ready to fight. Heat responds with a “Hell Yeah!” and smiles evilly. Tha Puerto Rican laughs, and then orders Heat to walk with him to the ring. P.R. and Heat high five while walking to the ring, with Colombian Heat dancing along the way.:: *But will find their place In line (Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha) But tie a string around your finger now boy Cuz, cuz…it’s just a matter of time Cuz you’ve got…NO CHANCE! (You’ve got no chance) NO CHANCE IN HELL!!! You’ve got…NO CHANCE! (Yeah, yeah, yeah) NO CHANCE IN HELL!!! You’ve got…NO CHANCE! (Got no chance) NO CHANCE IN HELL!!! You’ve got…NO CHANCE! (No Chance) NO CHANCE IN HELL!!! (YEAH!)* Michael Buffer: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, coming to the ring at this time, at a total combined weight of 396 lbs. From San Juan, Puerto Rico and Bogotá, Colombia, respectively. They are the heart of The Lightning Crew. The second-in-command of The Lightning Crew, Colombian Heat, AND the leader of The Lightning Crew, the former OaOasT Puerto Rican Champion, THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOOOOO RICANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!! Caboose: Buffer should have said former AND FUTURE OaOasT Puerto Rican Champion, because Tha Puerto Rican will definitely get the Puerto Rican Championship belt back soon! Cole: You heard it right. P.R. and Heat. The heart of The Lightning Crew. Caboose: Actually Tha Puerto Rican is the heart of The Lightning Crew, and Colombian Heat, Vitamin X, and Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez are the soul. But regardless, The Lightning Crew will not be breaking up anytime soon. P.R. and Colombian Heat have reconciled and are now ready to attack and kick all kinds of ass together as a team starting tonight! ::Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat walk cool and cocky to the ring as "No Chance In Hell" continues to play. The crowd continues booing them, some even throwing garbage in their direction. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat jaw with some fans at ringside and flip them off. The camera cuts to the ring where P.R. and Heat’s opponents are waiting. The two opponents stare at The Lightning Crew members with determined faces.:: Buffer: And their opponents. First, from San Francisco, California. Weighing in at 250 lbs. Standing 6"', he…is…SIMON STOONNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! ::Simon Stone raises his arms to minimal response. Stone yells. Stone is 27-years-old, Caucasian male, and has long, black, somewhat stringy hair and is sporting stubble. Stone wears a black singlet with red trim and flames on the tights. He also wears black kneepads, and black boots with red laces. He also has black wrist tape.:: Buffer: And his partner, from Jefferson City, Missouri. Weighing in at 230 lbs. Standing 6”0. TOM “CAPITAL” GORRRRRRRAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!! ::Tom “Capital” Goran raises his arms and smiles. He also gets minimal response. Tom is a 37-year-old Caucasian male with a rapidly thinning mullet, a tattoo of the NRA logo on his right short, and a 1970’s porn-style mustache. Tom wears short, black trunks with the word “CAPITAL” written on the back in white letters. He is also wearing black kneepads, and blue boots. He converses with Simon Stone as P.R. and Heat sneer.:: Cole: Tom “Capital” Goran and Simon Stone have a big task ahead of them. They are teaming for the first time tonight to take on two of the OaOasT’s most talented superstars in Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat. Heat and P.R. had this match booked by Vitamin X, in order to smooth things over. Caboose: And what a caring individual Vitamin X was to do this! He loves The Lightning Crew, and cannot fathom them no longer existing. What a great guy. Coach: Things looked to be cooled down earlier tonight between Colombian Heat and Puerto Rican. It seems like they are both back on the same page after that little bit of falling out 2 weeks ago. Caboose: Well, they didn’t appear on the show last week, so they had a week to cool down following that fight we saw in the ring. They had time to think things few and now they can get back to what’s really important. Getting the Puerto Rican Title back home to The Lightning Crew! Go get them, P.R.! P.R. and Colombian Heat step onto the ring apron and sneer at the crowd. They enter the ring, and spin around soaking in the jeers, and revealing in the hatred the fans feel for him. P.R. laughs evilly, and talks about how great he is, and then does the HBK-pose while pyro fires up behind him and Colombian Heat stands next to him posing. Tha Puerto Rican laughs evilly as the crowd boos loudly and chants "P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!" Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat get on the top rope and pose, receiving nothing but boos. P.R. flips the crowd off then heads to another turnbuckle, where a single spotlight shines on him. He poses a'la The Rock, and again receives boos. The crowd chants "P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!" but P.R. just sneers at the crowd as "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Boyds continues playing. Tha Puerto Rican jaws with the fans, then heads off the top rope and stands in the ring, as the lights go back on in the arena, and the fans chant "P.R. SUCKS!" "No Chance In Hell" by Bradley Boyds dies down. Colombian Heat removes his red backwards hat and sunglasses and clock. He then takes off his sweatsuit to reveal his wrestling attire and bounces off the ropes, dancing, getting the crowd hyped up. Tom Goran and Simon Stone stand in one corner of the ring looking at P.R. and Heat. Heat jaws with the fans as P.R. smiles evilly. The crowd still chants and Tha Puerto Rican still trash talks. The bell rings.:: *DING DING DING* Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat vs. Tom “Capital” Goran and Simon Stone: The camera cuts to The Mad Cappa standing in his dressing room with the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt over his right shoulder. He has an angry look on his face as he stands in his room watching the match. Cole: The Mad Cappa is watching his mortal enemy in this match. Caboose: He is not going to have that Puerto Rican Championship for long! The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” as P.R. and Heat sneer at the crowd. They do “Rock-Paper-Scissors” and Heat’s rock beats P.R.’s scissors, so Heat goes first. P.R. high fives Heat and then exits the ring as Tom “Capital” Goran enters first. Coach: I LOVE Rock-Paper-Scissors! Let’s play, ‘Boose! Caboose: Get away from me before I break your fingers! Coach: Fine! MC: Colombian Heat and Tom Goran starting things off. Colombian Heat and Tom “Capital” Goran circle the ring. They lock up and jockey for position. P.R. cheers Heat on as Heat gets the better of Goran. Heat whips Goran into the ropes, and follows with a reverse elbow to the face. Heat stomps on Tom as he tries to get up as the camera cuts to Cappa watching the match. Heat picks up Goran and sends him into P.R.’s corner. Heat chops Goran’s chest. Tha Puerto Rican takes the tag rope and chokes “Capital” with it. The crowd boos loudly as the referee orders P.R. to stop. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” as Heat tags in Tha Puerto Rican. Cole: And now Colombian Heat tags in Tha Puerto Rican who is taking over where Heat left off. Tha Puerto Rican chops Tom Goran. The crowd “WOOOOOOOOOOOs!” with each chop. P.R. trash talks Goran and then slaps him in the face. Tha Puerto Rican whips Goran into a turnbuckle, and follows with a Stinger Splash. P.R. follows with a sidewalk slam. He goes for the cover. 1… 2… KICK OUT!!! Cole: And Tom Goran kicks out just in the nick of time. Caboose: He was just lucky this time. He won’t be so lucky for long. P.R. chokes out Goran and then whips him into a turnbuckle. Goran reverses however, and Tha Puerto Rican Flair Flips onto the ring apron. Caboose: Spectacular move from Tha Puerto Rican! Tha Puerto Rican looks at the crowd and points to his brain to show how smart he is. The crowd boos loudly. P.R. dances, but is clotheslined by Goran to a loud pop. Coach: Tha Puerto Rican was caught by surprise with that move! P.R. gets back into the ring as Tom “Capital” Goran tags in Simon Stone. Stone rushes towards Puerto Rican and beats on him with rights and lefts. P.R. tries to fight back, but Stone continues the assault as the crowd comes alive once again. Cole: Simon Stone is now taking it to the former Puerto Rican Champion. Coach: Stone with rights and lefts on the face of Tha Puerto Rican. Simon Stone gives Tha Puerto Rican a European Uppercut. He Irish Whips Tha Puerto Rican into the ropes, and gives him a giant clothesline which causes Tha Puerto Rican to do a somersault onto the mat that causes the crowd to groan. MC: OH MY! What a tremendous clothesline from Simon Stone! Stone going for the cover. 1! 2! And P.R. kicks out! Close call. Stone almost had the upset right there! Caboose: Stone and Goran have no chance in hell of defeating the team of Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat! MC: Stone picks up P.R. and tags in Goran. And—oh come on! P.R. with a cheapshot, poking Stone in the eyes! Caboose: HA! HA! A great shot right there! A classic Caboose maneuver right there! HA! HA! Tha Puerto Rican tries to go to Colombian Heat, but Tom “Capital” Goran grabs his right leg. So, P.R. gives Tom an enzuguri, and tags in Colombian Heat. Colombian Heat kicks Tom Goran down to the mat, trash talking him along the way. Heat stops to pose and gets more boos. Heat gives some more hand signs and sneers at the crowd. He grabs Goran and gives him the Pimp Juice. He goes for the cover. 1… 2… THRE-KICK OUT!!! Colombian Heat punches Tom Goran in the face as the camera cuts to The Mad Cappa still watching the match in his dressing room. Heat grabs Goran and Irish Whips him into the ropes. He ducks under Goran and then grabs him by the neck; giving him the Gangsta Slam. Heat then heads to the ropes, and follows with the Where The Hood At?. He goes for the cover again. 1…2…KICK OUT!!! Heat gets a bit frustrated, but P.R. tells him to continue wrestling. MC: Heat grabs Tom Goran and Irish Whips him into the turnbuckle. Colombian Heat rushes towards Goran, but Goran sticks his right boot out, hitting Heat in the face. The crowd cheers as Tom grabs Heat and gives him a fallaway slam. He then picks up Heat, and punches him in the face several times. Goran Irish Whips Heat into the ropes, and goes for a German Suplex, but Heat reverses, and gives Goran the Get Crunk’d Up. The crowd boos loudly as Tha Puerto Rican applauds Heat. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” Heat knees Goran in the back several times and then picks him up. Coach: Colombian Heat is now heading to the top rope! What is he going to do now? Caboose: He could be going for the Drive-By, which is one of his signature moves. MC: If Heat hits The Drive-By, it could possibly be the end of this matchup. Coach: This is big. Colombian Heat gets on the top rope as the crowd stands up and boos loudly. Heat flips the crowd off and flashes some more gang signs, before leaping off the top with The Drive-By. However, Tom “Capital” Goran moves out of the way, and Heat hits the canvas to a loud pop. Michael Cole: And Heat eats canvas! Coachman: Tom Goran has just escaped the Drive-By! Talk about a surprise! Caboose: Aw! Come on! You got to be kidding me! Come on Heat! Get up! Get up! Tha Puerto Rican starts to show signs of worry and reaches his arm out for the tag. Tom “Capital” Goran slowly gets up and struggles to reach Simon Stone. The crowd cheers as Tom Goran tags in Simon Stone. MC: And Stone gets the tag just in the nick of time! Simon Stone beats on Colombian Heat as P.R. orders Heat to fight back. Stone punches Tha Puerto Rican in the face to a loud pop. Stone goes to Colombian Heat once again, but Heat lowblows Stone to boos. MC: Now come on! That is not right! Colombian Heat with an illegal move. A lowblow on Simon Stone! Colombian Heat trash talks Simon Stone and then gets behind him. He grabs his arms and lifts him up, and brings him down for the Colombian Necktie. Michael Cole: And now the Colombian Necktie! Colombian Heat has just hit Simon Stone with his finishing move! Caboose: It’s all over now! Simon Stone and Tom “Capital” Goran are about to feel the wrath of The Lightning Crew! HA! HA! Colombian Heat sneers at the crowd and then looks at Tha Puerto Rican. P.R. yells for Heat to tag him in. Heat is a little hesitant, saying, “Do I have to?” Tha Puerto Rican yells out “TAG ME IN, DAMNIT!” MC: It looks like Tha Puerto Rican wants to be the one who pins Simon Stone. Could this be more signs of dissension between P.R. and Heat? Caboose: You’re looking too much into it, Cole. Colombian Heat hesitates, but tags in Tha Puerto Rican. The crowd boos loudly as Tha Puerto Rican laughs evilly and gets ready to deliver the P.R. Nightmare. The crowd stands up and boos loudly as P.R. trash talks Simon Stone, sneering. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” MC: And now, it looks like it is all over. Simon Stone just got Colombian Necktie, and now it looks like P.R. is putting the exclamation point, by giving Stone the P.R. Nightmare. Coach: It could be all over for Simon Stone now! Caboose: Say goodbye, Simon Stone. The crowd boos loudly and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” as Stone slowly gets up. Some fans throw garbage into the ring, as Stone gets on one knee. P.R. yells, “GET UP, DAMNIT!” as Simon Stone, sweating and breathing hard, gets up. He turns around and gets kicked in the stomach. Tha Puerto Rican gives Simon Stone the P.R. Nightmare to boos, and cheers from Colombian Heat. MC: The P.R. Nightmare! Tha Puerto Rican has just given Simon Stone the P.R. Nightmare! It’s all over! Caboose: What a great move! P.R. covers Simon Stone. Tom “Capital” Goran tries to stop the pinfall, but Colombian Heat enters the ring and punches Goran out of the ring. 1… 2… 3!!! *DING DING DING* (3:39) MC: And the match is over! Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat win! Caboose: As if there were any doubt! Michael Buffer: The winners of this contest…COLOMBIAN HEAT AND THA PUERTOOOOOOOOOOOO RICANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!! Caboose: Notice that Colombian Heat’s name was said first? See? There are no problems with The Lightning Crew! It is all for naught. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are still friends. They’re closer than most brothers are! They are like family. There are absolutely positively no problems with these two! Coachman: For now, Caboose. For now. ::”No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Boyds starts playing again as the crowd boos loudly and throws garbage into the ring. The referee raises Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat’s hands in the air as the crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” P.R. laughs evilly as Colombian Heat tries to catch his breathe and wipe the sweat off his forehead. Tha Puerto Rican jaws with the fans and flips them the middle finger, sneering at the crowd the entire time. Tha Puerto Rican talks with Colombian Heat as Simon Stone and Tom “Capital” Goran slowly exit the ring. Heat sports a cocky smirk and flashes some gang signs and then yells out “YEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHHHHH BOOOOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!”:: MC: It was a hard fought battle, but the heart and soul of The Lightning Crew came out on top this time around. But Tom Goran and Simon Stone have nothing to be ashamed about. They put up a fight. It was a valiant effort, but in the end, Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat came out on top. Coachman: It seems like the trouble these two have had with each other is over. These two are once again on the same team, and they showed it tonight with their win over two very talented individuals. Caboose: You make it seem like it was an upset. A surprise that P.R. and Heat actually won. Stop B.S.’ing yourselves. It was obviously from the get go that these two would win. And once again, let me remind you. There are NO problems between P.R. and Heat. It is all lies. It is all propaganda insulated by the OaOasT. The Lightning Crew is fine. Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are still friends. BEST friends in fact. It is all lies. Trust me. It is all lies, and that’s the truth, Ruth! ::”No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Boyds continues playing as Colombian Heat puts his right hand out. P.R. smiles and looks at the crowd. He shakes hands with Colombian Heat with huge smiles on both their faces, and then gives him a hug. The crowd boos even louder and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!”:: Caboose: You see? Everything is fine! Colombian Heat and Tha Puerto Rican are a unit once again! Everything is Okkkkkkkkaaay! MC: Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat are on a roll here tonight. They have worked well as a team. Coachman: And they still have to deal with The Mad Cappa who, as we just saw, is in the building. ::Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat continue shaking hands when the crowd stands up and cheers loudly as The Mad Cappa runs into the ring.:: MC: THE MAD CAPPA IS HERE! THE MAD CAPPA HAS ARRIVED! Coachman: AND HE LOOKS PISSED! ::The crowd cheers loudly as The Mad Cappa hits Colombian Heat in the back of the head with the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt. The crowd chants “MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA! MAD CAP-PA!” The Mad Cappa beats on Colombian Heat while Tha Puerto Rican exits the ring. Cappa whips Heat into a turnbuckle, and stomps a mudhole in him.:: MC: And The Mad Cappa is now taking it to Colombian Heat! Caboose: Now what is he doing here? He had nothing to do with this match? He surprised P.R.! What kind of man is he? Can you tell me what kind of man is wearing the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt around his waist? Coach: Tha Puerto Rican attacked Mad Cappa 2 weeks ago on HeldDOWN~! Cappa is just returning the favor right now! Caboose: But he hasn’t even gotten to Tha Puerto Rican yet! ::The Mad Cappa whips Heat into the ropes and follows with the Fall From Grace. He then gets up and waits for Heat to get up. The crowd cheers loudly as Cappa trash talks to Heat. Heat gets up slowly, when suddenly Tha Puerto Rican grabs a steel chair and smashes it across the back of Cappa’s head.:: MC: Oh come on! Caboose: Hey, that’s fair! This isn’t a match! And The Mad Cappa attacked first! ::The Mad Cappa lies on the mat struggling to get up. Tha Puerto Rican smashes the chair across Cappa’s back again. He then does it a third time. Then a fourth time. Cappa screams loudly as he grabs the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt that lies on the mat. P.R. looks at the belt with a psychotic look on his face. He smiles evilly as he grabs the Puerto Rican Championship belt and kneels down. Colombian Heat coughs as he struggles to get up. P.R. grabs the belt and sneers at Mad Cappa. He waits for Cappa to get up, and hits him in the face with the Puerto Rican Championship belt. The crowd boos loudly as P.R. raises the Puerto Rican Championship belt to loud boos and “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” chants. The crowd pelts him with garbage as P.R. laughs evilly and sneers at The Mad Cappa, who is lying on the mat in pain, struggling to get up.:: Caboose: There he is, the REAL Puerto Rican Champion! The REAL man! He is a man’s man! He is better than The Mad Cappa in many ways! The Mad Cappa is just a jabrony. Cole: That belt belongs to The Mad Cappa, but Tha Puerto Rican is the one raising the belt right now. Coachman: P.R. wants his belt back, and he will get it at all costs! Cole: The Mad Cappa entered the ring and was attacked with a chair 4 times, and then hit in the head with the Puerto Rican Championship belt! The Puerto Rican Champion is now on the mat, and the former Champion is standing over him victorious! Caboose: It’s the way things should be. Tha Puerto Rican-Puerto Rican Champion. The Mad Cappa-lying on the mat in pain. ::”No Chance In Hell” begins to play again as Tha Puerto Rican places the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt over his left shoulder. He smiles and laughs evilly as Colombian Heat gets up and kicks Cappa in the stomach. Cappa is in the fetal position as P.R. laughs evilly and leaves the ring…with the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt over his left shoulder. P.R. jaws with the fans as he heads to the entrance.:: MC: Wait a minute. What? What is Tha Puerto Rican doing now? He just stole the Puerto Rican Championship belt from The Mad Cappa? Caboose: He didn’t steal the belt! He brought it back to its rightful owner! The belt is back with Tha Puerto Rican! Jonathon “The Coach” Coachman: The Mad Cappa is not going to be happy when he finds out his belt is gone! And taken by Tha Puerto Rican! MC: P.R. and Colombian Heat are leaving the ring with the Puerto Rican Championship! That son-of-a-bitch has just stolen The Mad Cappa’s title! Caboose: And bravo for that! It’s about time P.R. got his belt back. Cappa has had the belt for 2 weeks now. That is enough time already. It’s time for the belt to return to its owner—Tha Puerto Rican! ::”No Chance In Hell” by Bradley Boyds continues playing as Tha Puerto Rican walks to the entrance. He raises the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt to loud boos as the crowd throws garbage in his direction. P.R. jaws with the fans along with Colombian Heat. The Mad Cappa is now up, and looks at the entrance in pain. Tha Puerto Rican laughs evilly and smiles evilly as he places the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt over his left shoulder and flips Cappa the middle finger. He does the People’s Eyebrow and then leaves through the curtain. The crowd boos and chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” The Mad Cappa lies in the ring in pain, on his knees. He is furious that the belt is gone. Cappa gets out of the ring, and stumbles towards the entrance. Cappa trips, but gets up and continues walking through the curtain.:: Michael Cole: Well, now, The Mad Cappa is following Tha Puerto Rican. And he looks pissed, but can he continue in his condition? Caboose: If the belt means as much to The Mad Cappa as it does to Tha Puerto Rican, then he will go after it, even if he has to crawl on his knees. Coach: Tha Puerto Rican has left the ring with the OaOasT Puerto Rican Championship belt by his side, and now, The Mad Cappa is chasing after him! Something tells me that this isn’t over! Cole: It certainly looks like things are about to pick up. We’ll be right back with more OaOasT HeldDOWN~! Right after these messages! ::FADE OUT:: ::COMMERCIALS::

The show opens not with the usual HeldDOWN~! logo and montage, but with text reading, "The following has been paid for by The Friends And Sponsors of Totally Endorsed". The text screen then fades to a shot of Sly Sommers, sitting in a big, plush chair at the long table in the Totally Endorsed locker room, wearing a custom-made designer suit. SLY Hello, and welcome to the OAOAST's HeldDOWN~!. As you all know by now, I dropped the mother of all bombs last week, announcing to the entire viewing public what only very few "in the know" knew before seven nights ago, and that was that OAOAST World Champion Zack Malibu was, in fact, the man who trained me to become a professional wrestler. However, he decided that, due to prejudice against me for having an admittedly large ego by nature, he would try and make my start in the OAOAST harder than what it would already be by using his political power in the locker room to have all of the boys shun me, and no one acknoledge on-air that I was the first graduate of his training school. Now that this information is out to the public, everything makes so much more sense now...why would Totally Endorsed bring in a brand spankin' new rookie and make him a member of the pack of the most elite athletes this company's ever seen? They knew that I had trained with Zack Malibu. They knew that Malibu instilled his basic instincts both a wrestler and a person in me, and therefore could spread the word to them, and help them gain the edge in their perennial war with the ultimate crowd kiss-up. That is why T.E. let some punk-ass rookie into the fold. I'm going to keep the rest of my spiel short and sweet, other than I know that Zack taped an interview earlier this week with Michael Cole to be aired tonight, that is supposed to explain his stance in this situation. I know that the OAOAST hype machine will spin his lies and mistruths as the holy gospel, so I promise that, sometime tonight, I will display just exactly how Zack treated me, his star student, throughout the course of my training at my school. After you see both sides of the story, then you, the fan, can decide who is right. Thank you for your time, and enjoy the show. That fades into... OAOAST HeldDOWN~! “Trust me” by Lucy Woodward plays as we SEE THE LOGO~ Fireworks go BOOM!, and the crowd goes ape-nuts! We then cut to Sofa Central... MC Welcome to this week's edition of HeldDOWN~!! I am Michael Cole, sitting alongside Jonathan Coachman and Caboose to bring you another spectacular edition of HeldDOWN~!. Tell the audience what we got on tap for this week, Coach! COACH This week on the program, you will see a battle weeks in the making, as Saint Andrew's monster Gibaltar is going head-to-head with his top nuiscance of the past few weeks, Hoff! I doubt the ring will be able to hold all of the animosity that those two have for each other! CABOOSE Plus, Crystal will defend her 24/7 Title against the Lightning Crew's Spanish Fly, in what should be a very exciting contest between the fighting champion and the high-flying Latino rookie! MC Also, I recorded a sit-down interview with Zack Malibu on Tuesday morning, as he addressed what Sly Sommers brought up on last week's program, where he revealed what was a well-kept secret within the industry, that Zack had, in fact, trained Sly to become a wrestler. COACH According to the message that Sly left us all with at the beginning of the program, he already has a response prepared that he wants us all to see, and I guess we'll be seeing that later in the show as well. Without any further ado, let's get to th... *We are suddenly taken to a dark room in the back. A green light illuminates from the floor lighting up Damaramu's face. Behind him another light illuminates the face of Skull Mask.* DAMA Originally me and Skull Mask here were supposed to go for the tag team titles. Well I've decided against that. I'm not a tag team wrestler! And if I were the champion then I'd have to defend the titles. And that means to get my hands on Ryan Smith he'd have to find a partner. And we know he has no friends. Plus this punk Drek Stone needs to be taught a thing or to about respect and pain! But Skull still wants those tag team titles. So I brought somebody up to handle this. Another follower of mine and an old friend of Skull Mask. I brought the Skull Kid. And you'll get your first look at him in action next week. When he teams up with Skull Mask to take on any team that is crazy enough to face them. Oh yeah...it's happening. The Cult of Damaramu will soon control everything. Skull Kid.....say hello. *Suddenly a green light illuminates right in front of Damaramu revealing the face of another person painted with a Skull Mask. Only his hair is long and blonde with black streaks. Just like Skull Mask he shows no emotion as Damaramu sneers behind him.* ::The camera cuts to the DOA Office, where Abe Vigoda is busy watching HeldDown on his private television monitor. He begins to rise out of his chair until Drek Stone barges into the room without knocking. Immediately, Abe sits back down:: DREK Listen, I heard you wanted to see me…. ABE Ah, yes, I did. So you’re the Drek Stone everybody seems to be talking about….. DREK You have amazing deductive skills, you know that, Abe? ABE Well, of course. You’re bound to learn something from watching Matlock once in a while. DREK Right, right….*looks at his platinum watch*……listen, can we…..uh…..? ABE My secretary tells me you’re from New York, Mr. Stone? DREK Nothing gets past you, Abe. ABE I was in New York a couple of times. Nice place. The people there are very friendly. One time, boy, I had just a crazy time. As soon as I walked out of Grand Central Station, there was a woman standing there. Red push-up bra……fishnet stockings….it just woke me right up……in more places than one, if you know what I mean. Heh heh. She asked me if I felt like having a good time. Well, she didn’t have to ask me twice, let me tell you! Walking to my hotel room, I couldn’t help but think about just how nice people in New York City are. Offering you sexual intercourse right there on the spot! DREK Oh, Christ. Abe, what was the….. ABE So we went up into my hotel room and just went wild. It was amazing. But afterwards, she asks for 500 dollars. Which I found a little odd. I mean, I knew the relationship was going forward quickly, but this motza ball was already asking to borrow money. So, I mean, we had a minor argument back and forth for a little while, and…. DREK ABE!! Marrone……what did you want from me? ABE Won’t even let a man finish a good story……they weren’t lying about you, Mr. Stone. You want me to give you my announcement? Fine. I didn’t want you to feel left out at Living Anglelously in a few weeks. So I’ve already booked you in a match. DREK No….don’t tell me…. ABE That’s right. At the next Pay Per View, I’m putting you in a match against DAMARAMU! DREK Oh, get the hell out of here. I don’t have time to deal with these kinds of distractions! We both know I didn’t sign up with the OAOAST to fight someone like DAMA, out of all people. ABE Well, there is a way for you to get out of the matchup….. DREK …….yeah? ABE Sure. Just make peace with him tonight. Shake his hand in the ring, bury the hatchet between you two…..and I’ll scrap the match immediately. I have no interest in putting you in a match with a guy you have absolutely no problem with. DREK Hmmm….okay, no problem. I have the perfect way to end the bad blood between myself and Dama. I have the PERFECT gift planned for him. The brainless masses out there will be drooling all over themselves to get this present…..and it would be for Dama. This is all I have to do? ABE That’s it. DREK Good. Good. No more meaningless obstacles like Dama in my way. Excellent…. *Drek slowly walks out of the room without saying goodbye to Abe* ABE The whippersnapper thinks I’m going senile, isn’t he? Ho ho….this is going to be amusing to watch……. *The camera cuts back to the three announcers sitting at ringside* COACH Does Drek actually think Dama is going to accept a peacemaking gift tonight? CABOOSE Dama better accept the gift. It could help preserve his career AND would keep Drek on his steamlined path to the championship. Win/Win for everybody. COLE Win/Win….give me a break. It looks like Mr. Vigoda still has a few tricks up his sleeve. CABOOSE Can someone explain to me just who the hell he was talking to anyway? ::The camera cuts to The Lightning Crew dressing room. The crowd boos loudly as Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat sit in the dressing room. P.R. and Heat are looking at each other with angry expressions on their faces. Colombian Heat is wearing a red sweatsuit and is twirling his hat. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!”:: Tha Puerto Rican: So, PROTOTYPE is now gone from The Lightning Crew. Colombian Heat: Yeah, man. That is just wack, yo. What happened to him? Tha Puerto Rican: Probably in some ditch somewhere giving blowjobs for crack money. Colombian Heat: Oh snap! Now that was a diss! Tha Puerto Rican: And I am no longer the Puerto Rican Champion. Colombian Heat: Yeah, that is like, I don’t know, but it sucks, G. Tha Puerto Rican: And we’ve had some problems over the past few weeks. Colombian Heat: Hey man, I’m sorry about hitting you with the chair at AngleMania III. That was an accident; you know what I’m saying? I did not mean anything by it. It was all an accident. Tha Puerto Rican: Your apology is accepted. Colombian Heat: Ah. Thanks, man. That really means a lot to me. That you’re not pissed. Tha Puerto Rican: Oh, I’m still pissed. But, it’s time to move on. Is everything cool between us? Heat: Hey, I’m cool with ya. Got no problem wit you P.R. You’re my #1 homie. We tight like ice. We’re like brothers. We’re homies. We’re friends, bro. And I don’t see us like not being friends in a long time. P.R.: Just get one thing clear, Heat. I am the leader of The Lightning Crew. I am the puppetmaster. I am the brain. I am the heart, and you are the soul. You do exactly what I say all the time. If it weren’t for the fact that you were my best friend, you would call me boss. Know your role, and shut your mouth. I’m Batman, you’re Robin. I’m Penn, you’re Teller. I’m Shawn Michaels, you’re Marty Jannety. I’m Chuck D., you’re Flava Flav. I’m Michael Jackson, you’re Tito. It is always, ALWAYS, ALWAYS Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat. NOT Colombian Heat and Tha Puerto Rican. You got all that? Colombian Heat: Whatever you say, boss! I will do whatever you say, man. My loyalty is to you and only you. Tha Puerto Rican: I like what I hear. Now, we got a match coming up next. Now, DON’T SCREW ANYTHING UP! Colombian Heat: Yes sir! ::Colombian Heat gets up, but is pulled back by Tha Puerto Rican. P.R. and Heat engage in a staredown. P.R. sneers at Heat.:: Tha Puerto Rican: I mean that. DO NOT SCREW THIS FOR ME! YOU. GOT. THAT? DO. YOU. UNDERSTAND? Colombian Heat: All right. Alright. No problemo. A’ight. Don’t worry. I got this. I got dis down. You don’t have to worry, yo. We gonna win. Me and you. As a team. Man, no force of nature and no act of God can stop us. We’re untouchable. HA! HA! P.R.: Good. Now then. We can actually do this. Let’s go. ::The crowd boos loudly as Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat leave. The crowd chants “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!”:: Michael Cole: Tha Puerto Rican and Colombian Heat in action next! COMMERCIAL BREAK

Got all of those segments, SJ and Zack. I'd appreciate if we could get in the final stuff in for this week within the next hour. The show already looks pretty big as is.

16, from the home of Jim F'n Hellwig...Crawfordsville, Indiana.

Reminder: all stuff needs to be turned in by 5 PM tomorrow. I've already got a lot of stuff already, and thanks to those who have made my job a lot easier by getting the stuff to me early. I appreciate it.

I just noticed that, lol. I dunno what the situation is going to turn out to be, but I've had my match written for a week now, and I don't really feel like changing it. Plus, I announced my match a good amount of time before MST3K did.

I thought it was during Hero/B-Boy, but someone else said it might have been when Collyer came out. Either way, we got back at them with a "Buy Some Tapes!" chant.

Yeah, I know who you guys are. Hero/B-Boy was a tremendous match, but you got to know that Chicago-area fans are total a-holes who don't respect good wrestling because they're jealous of how good an outside company has done after coming in just five months or so ago. I don't know if you noticed, but there were plenty of area-indy workers at the show. I think the only two that didn't come to bash the show were Danny Dominion (who was standing over by you guys for most of the night) and D-Von Fury from Simply Marvelous (he also worked IWA for a while as "Orangejello" of the Jello Bros. tag team). No, I was referring to the side of the building that had the entrance door, which is what I thought you were referring to directional-wise. We were sitting front row on the same side as where the wrestlers came out. I'm surprised you didn't recognized Todd, Tom, and/or Yan from other tapes, since they're front row at over 3/4th of the past two years' worth of IWA shows.

I remember you guys now. My group was sitting on that side of the building, but in the front row (if you guys were paying attention, we had Nick Maniwa and Tommy Thompson come over and talk to us more than once throughout the night).

I'd rather see Ian vs. Tank than Tank vs. Boz, because Ian and Tank's styles mirror each other.

Were you guys over in the bleachers? I was in the front row with all of the guys from Lafayette that go to all of the big IWA shows. Speaking of Fannin fans, my friend Todd that was sitting next to me is a Jim Fannin super-fan, and kept marking out for him during the night.

I was at both shows, and to say that both shows were really great is an understatement. I wasn't into April Bloodshowers as much as I should have been due to a headache and overall head cold, but it was a tremendous show. APRIL BLOODSHOWERS Michael Shane over Nate Webb & Adam Flash (Nate and Flash tried, Michael didn't seem to be) MsChif over Daizee Haze (For a heel, MsChif is over as hell as a face; MsChif broke out all kinds of really cool wacky, stretchy hold, and her inverted armbar DDT thing (you have to see it to know what I'm talking about) is freakin' awesome) HUSS! over Roderick Strong (Strong beat up Jacobs like he owed him money, and Jimmy took it like a maniac) Delirious over Nigel McGuinness (I thought the comedy at the beginning was pretty funny (Nigel: "Whatever you're smokin', I want some!" Delirious: "PCP!"), and the funky Euro-style matwork after that was tremendous. Sidenote: Nigel is now selling a "Best of" DVD, including a 55-minute HWA match against Chad Collyer. Too bad I barely had money to even eat, let alone buy stuff) IWA-MS Light Heavyweight Champion Matt Sydal over Emil Sitoci (Fun match, and Matt gave Emil a ton of offense) BJ Whitmer over Jerry Lynn to win IWA-MS Heavyweight Title (It wasn't the usual Jerry Lynn formula match, and therefore I liked it; they inserted a lot of crowd brawling, and Whitmer even bladed; the post-match teased a Whitmer face turn) Arik Cannon d. Chad Collyer (Really good technical match, and Cannon shined) Mark Wolf over Danny Daniels to win his "unknown stipulation" (Wolf physically looked as good as I've ever seen him; another really good match, but this is where my details start fading more and more, as exhaustion from the long day started sitting in. Post-match, we find out that Danny Daniels broke the microphone when he threw it down after his pre-match promo, and they had to do the angle where Mark Wolf got Chris Hero back into IWA w/out a mic) AJ Styles over B-Boy (Excellent match, match of the night, stiff as hell, and I thought the finish was cool...how's THAT for details? hehe) Fans Bring the Weapons: JC Bailey & Necro Butcher over Wifebeater and Corporal Robinson (A violent, violent spectacle that left me with my mouth opened in shock half of the time based on the stuff that these guys were doing to each other (that might be more because I've never seen a FBTW match in person); match ended after both Robinson and Wifebeater nailed each other, leading to Wifebeater putting Corp. through a lighttube table with a double-handed chokeslam; the ring was a sea of lighttube glass and blood by the end of the night) April Bloodshowers was a really good show, but the best was yet to come... SIMPLY THE BEST 5 Austin Aries over Michael Shane (Shane was again down with a case of "resthold fever", but Aries busted his ass to make this one good) Daizee Haze & Mickie Knuckles over MsChif and Allison Danger (Mickie busted her ass off and bumped like a demon while she was in as the face-in-peril; the story happening here was that MsChif refused to behave as a partner for Allison (or anyone else, for that matter), and therefore we got a few miscommunication spots; post-match, Allison attacked MsChif, Mickie and Daizee saved MsChif, and then MsChif misted Mickie because she hates everyone, yet might be one of the most over workers in IWA at the Highland shows) Danny Daniels over Colt Cabana (Total comedy match while Colt was on offense, besides for the few cool lucha spots he probably picked up while in Tijuana a couple of weeks back; the finish left an opening for a possible rematch, through Danny having to cheat to win) Zack Gowan over Trik Davis (It wasn't really too much of a match; post-match, Shelley and Gowan beat on Trik, including Shelley cranking back on the Border City Stretch so far that it probably did legitimately hurt Trik) Petey Williams over Jimmy Jacobs, Roderick Strong, Arik Cannon, Nate Webb, and Emil Sitoci (listed in reverse order of elimination) (Really, really amazing match; Strong again beat on Jacobs like Jimmy killed Rod's mom or something; Nate took a really hellacious bump that had almost everyone in attendance worrying for his health, as he overshot and overotated on a top rope moonsault plancha onto the other guys and landed back-first on the edge of one of the chairs; Arik Cannon, like MsChif, works as a heel in Highland but is way over as a face; Sitoci hasn't even been wrestling a year, but you cannot tell by how he works in the ring; both the match and Petey Williams got seperate standing ovations after the match) Steve Stone over Adam Flash (This was alright, but it couldn't compete with all of the other really great stuff on this show) AJ Styles over Matt Sydal (Second best match of the night; the story of this match was that Matt was the new young lion biting at AJ's heels, and was able to keep up with him at every turn; the best match I've seen Matt have where Delirious wasn't in the match, and AJ, by no means, had to make sure Matt was either keeping up with him nor did he have to noticeably carry him through anything; AJ cut a post-match promo where he said Matt was better than anyone's expectations that had him poised as "the next AJ Styles", and that he was "the first Matt Sydal") Jerry Lynn over Delirious (Pretty good match, but they had a superbly tough act to follow; a lot of hijinx in the early part of the match regarding a small bunny rabbit toy that a fan gave Delirious, including Delirious taking it away from a female at ringside and first putting it into one guy's hat, and then down another guy's shirt (the schitck was funny, outside of the morons who wouldn't shut up about the bunny and kept repeating the same really lame "jokes" when Jerry and Delirious started to actually wrestle; Lynn's knee looked to give out during the match, and he even acknoledged it over the house mic) Chad Collyer & Nigel McGuinness over Brad Bradley & Ryan Boz in a Tag Team Tournament Qualifying match (Another really great technical match, with the normally monster-style working Bradley hanging on the mat with Collyer and Nigel; Nigel played face-in-peril, and the heels beat the living tar out of him (though Nigel struck back just as hard when he got back on offense); Jim Fannin got into the ring as Bradley and Boz were going for their double horse-collar face plant finisher, which caused B'n'B to go tell Jim to leave the ring, which then gave Nigel and Collyer the opportunity to roll them up for the upset win; post-match, Carmine DeSpirito (B'n'B's other manager) fired Fannin as the advisor of the team, and begged Ian for another shot at the tournament...Ian agreed for May 9th in Highland, but if B'n'B lose, they split up forever...and two more details: their opponents will be the Havana Pitbulls, as managed by Bobby "The Brain" Heenan) Samoa Joe over IWA-MS Heavyweight Champion BJ Whitmer in a non-title match (Better than their ROH effort, though I don't know if it's better than their PWG effort since I haven't seen it; Joe completely obliterated Whitmer with forearms and chops, and was over like hell) In the big surprise match of the night, B-Boy over Chris Hero in a tremendous two-out-of-three falls match (Before the match, Samoa Joe came back out to try and get B-Boy to back out of the match so that he could fight Hero, but Hero said no, because he wanted to conclude his series of matches with B-Boy the right way; I literally cannot do this match justice because it was so good; the only negative is how annoying, rude, and ignorant some of the fans were, with a good portion of the crowd, all seeming to be either WWE marks or local workers that weren't good enough to get booked, either walking out of the show or chanting "Who are you?" at Hero. I don't want to end this on a negative note, so I'll say this: this match is worth spending the $15 on and getting the tape, though there's absolutely nothing bad on the show, and quite a few really good matches) Wifebeater and Corporal Robinson went to a draw in a two-out-of-three tables match when the third table ended up being a reenforced table that would not break (Robinson broke the first one with his Boot Camp cobra clutch Russian legsweep, and Wifebeater broke the second one in some way that I forget. They seemed to accidentally break the original third table, so Corp. asked for the match to restart, and Nate Webb carried a third table to ringside. Unfortunately, the third one, like the Nate Webb/JC Bailey match from the month before, wouldn't break after countless efforts by both guys to break it. Dave Prazak tried making the announcement that the match was a draw due to an unbreakable table, but there were a bunch of morons that kept chanting "Bullshit!" because apparantly nothing up until this point was worth their money, and they wanted to see a man literally die because of a shitty table. This noticeably riled up both guys, so they tried breaking it a couple of more times before Prazak announced the match was over, and the following quote: "This contest has been ruled a draw due to a stubborn fuckin' table! The morale of the story is: tables don't always break." *************************** I couldn't ask for anything more out of either show, and I hope the greatness of both shows translates to tape, since it would be nothing but beneficiary to IWA to have two shows this good out on Smart Mark Video for people to see and either continue to like the product, or jump on the bandwagon.

Steve Stone's teaming with Ian right now. As for new teams...they could probably team up Nate Webb with anyone and watch it get over easy. Sydal & Delirious are considered a regular face team, despite all of their singles matches. Danny Daniels and BJ Whitmer were supposed to work a qualifying match for the tag tournament against Stone & Rotten before they had to switch around the last Oolitic show due to the building switching around the show date. Other than that...I don't know.

I think the four-way itself might still be on, but it won't be for the belts. More on that when the official announcement comes out.

Geez, thanks for making me feel greedy, hehe. But, I'm back on for Simply the Best. I finally got ahold of a back-up for the guy that can't go on Saturday.

I've got planned: Rave & Assault Squad vs. Phoenix, Chris Stevens, and Mike Hunt A sit-down interview with Michael Cole asking Zack Malibu the tough questions about what was revealed on HeldDOWN~! this week. Hoff....Gibraltar....something's going down, (please PM me, Hoff.) Plus...sandwiches for everyone.

The storyline was that Sly saying that was completely breaking kayfabe and going into a quasi-shoot on the air. It would be like travelling back 15 years and having a WWF wrestler blab on and on about WCW on Saturday Night's Main Event.

Sorry about that, man. I just edited it in. I was trying to organize this, and a road trip this weekend, and I didn't have time to think when it came to double-checking. Again, sorry.

Blah...something-something...blah.

*PROPS* Myself CWM NY Untouchable CC Zack Dama Mystery Eskimo Papacita

MC It's time for Zack Malibu's first match since gaining the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title in the biggest match in OAOAST history, defeating his mortal enemy Calvin Szechstein at Anglemania III, and he's not giving himself a night off here! COACH Zack's facing probably the largest man he's had to face since his in-ring debut, as he's battling Saint Andrew's monster Gibraltar. But, we saw earlier that Saint Andrew was inside the Totally Endorsed locker room. What does that have to do with this match? CABOOSE Plus, don't forget...Sly Sommers still hasn't dropped that HUGE bombshell about his past with Zack Malibu that he's promised to drop! MC With all that out of the way, let's go to the ring for our big main event! ("Pompeii" starts up, and the lights go down for the entrance of Saint Andrew and Gibraltar, but no one comes out.) COACH What in the hell...? CABOOSE I'm sure there is a VERY valid excuse behind this. There has to be! MC Whatever. We are being told that we're going to cut to Zack Malibu's entrance to cut down on this long stalling since we do not have much television time left. (The ring lights come back on, as "Bring Me To Life" starts up over the PA system. Zack Malibu comes out with the OAOAST World Title belt around his waist to a huge ovation, but he looks to be quite nervous.) CABOOSE I don't know what he has more reason to be nervous about: Sly's announcement ruining his career, or Gibraltar ending his life! MC Zack's mind does seem to be elsewhere, which is never a good thing when you have to face an angry seven foot, five hundred pounder! (The lights come down again, and "Pompeii" plays for about thirty seconds before all of the lights come back up. The referee walks over to tell Michael Buffer that Gibraltar has a ten-count to get to the ring, but right then, "Orange Crush" starts up, and Sly Sommers steps out onto the stage, with a microphone in his hand.) SLY Zack, Zack, Zack...what did I say? I've been waiting for the perfect opportunity to make the big announcement that everyone across the country is waiting for. The speculation throughout the past seven days has been enormous. Some people think that we're really brothers. If that's the case, then Mom certainly gave me the "handsome gene". CABOOSE That's certaintly true! MC Man, that was gay. CABOOSE So one man can't admire another's handsome...ocity? SLY Some people think that I'm here to announce that Zack is the newest member of Totally Endorsed, and that this is all nothing but a gigantic swerve. That couldn't be further from the truth! If that were true, a cow will fly out of my ass in the next five seconds! One...two...three....four...five! See, no cow is trying to exit my anus! COACH That might be the single weirdest thing that Sly Sommers has ever said, and he's said some strange things! SLY Heck, I read on one message board that I was going to come out and reveal that we were once in a Prussian dance troupe, led by Caboose! CABOOSE Yeah...HEY, wait a second! SLY What I'm about to say might shock a few of you, and I know, from the look on your face Zack, that you already know. So, here I go...first off, how many of you people read the Internet regularly? (slight applause) Okay, good. You people that cheered probably know about December of 2002, when Mr. Malibu here decided that he was enough of a wily veteran to open his own wrestling school. MC Okay, I know where this is going now...could we please cut off the cameras and call it a night? SLY Many young men signed on for the school so that they could be trained by the number one icon in the number one wrestling promotion in the world. But, very few stayed on from the original class, Zack. In fact, only four did. Three of those students are still in the school. COACH Really, can we just go off-air right now? WHAT? Colvid's in the production truck with a baseball bat? Oh great! SLY But, one of those students rose above even those who lasted. One of those students ended up breezing through all of the lessons you had to teach when the others were still struggling on collar-and-elbow tie-ups. One of those students came into the school knowing he was better than the rest of the chumps, and proved himself day-in and day-out. The thing is...you never liked that student, Zack. You constantly would use him to show the other guys the proper way to stretch an opponent or pop a bone out of socket, because you found this guy to be brash and annoying. CABOOSE Sly, please don't cross the line here, man. SLY Zack, you gotta listen to this...get your head out of that turnbuckle! (Zack's shaking his head as he's basically buried his face in the top turnbuckle) Anyway, Zack...you decided that, when the time came for this guy to graduate from your school and debut in the big time to tell him that he wasn't "good enough". You took it upon yourself to tell this kid that he "would never make it in this industry". You crushed a young man's dreams just because you personally thought he was a bit annoying! MC On behalf of everyone here at HeldDOWN~!, we seriously apologize for what's transpiring here. This, by no means, was meant to be a part of the show at all, and should have never been brought up. SLY This guy ended up making it here WITHOUT you, Zack! Within a couple of months of his debut, he won his first piece of gold, which is unheard of in this business! This guy became the right-hand man to this company's World Champion as a rookie! This guy, Zack...was ME! ( COACH Can we even go in-depth about this on commentary? SLY But see, outside of the boys in the back, nobody knew this fact up until now. Why, you ask? I'll be happy to explain. You see, you were so ashamed of the fact that someone that you thought was so foolish and so naive made it through your training system so quickly and easily that you actually used your gigantic political stroke around here to block any mention of me being your first student on any HeldDOWN~! broadcast. CABOOSE Dude, just stop right now, I beg you. SLY You made sure that, even though you knew that this guy had the talent to elevate himself to the top of the mountain in little time, he made sure that the kid couldn't use his name in hopes that it would possibly benefit his career, just because you thought the kid was brash. Zack, guess what? The kid didn't need your help, you selfish bastard. The kid ended up becoming a star on his own, even without your lack of help or guidance. Zack...that kid was ME! (The crowd comes down in a collective silence, as Zack is standing there in shame, with his head hanging low and his hand brushing through his hair.) MC I can't believe he just brought that up. I can't (bleep)ing believe it! SLY Go ahead, Zack...be ashamed of yourself, you worthless son of a bitch! You are a fraud! You come out here every week, and claim to be the good, caring, honest champion of the people. But think about it, Zack...what champion of the people would use his pull to attempt to make sure that someone else's career never got off of the ground? What champion of the people would deny his past and then use it against someone who never deserved to be slapped in the face by someone who admired and looked up to you, just like all of these people? I know the real Zack Malibu, and what you see on TV is a farce. (Sly walks down the aisle, and ends up standing right in front of the ring, as Malibu looks down on him from the ring in anger.) SLY Zack...for every sweat, for every drop of blood, and for every tear that went through my body as you trained me, and then turned your back on me and shut the door as soon as you thought I was getting too big for my britches...I will make you feel that pain, and so much more. On April 25th, I will gain my revenge. On April 25th, I will destroy the legend of Zack Malibu. On April 25th, I will win that World Heavyweight Title and expose you as even more of a fake than you are already! (Zack cocks his fists back, looking ready to fight.) SLY Go ahead, Zack...if you think knocking me out cold right here, right now makes you the better man, then do so. But, just so you know, I got people looking out for me. Look on the big screen over there... The camera then cuts to the back, as the cameraman runs to the exit of the locker room area. The camera turns around both directions, and then catches a board laying on the floor. The camera cuts back up, and we see Gibraltar and Hoff brawling their way out of the building, with Saint Andrew laid out on the concrete floor. The camera then turns around, and sees Crystal walking out of the building, with the 24/7 belt slung over her shoulder. Colvid then runs out of the production truck, as we can see from the open garage sliding door leading to the outside, and runs inside of the building. He charges at Crystal with his baseball bat, but she drops her stuff and ducks. Both then turn around, and Crystal grabs Colvid by the hair and belt, and tosses him into the wall face-first, knocking him out cold. We then cut back to the arena, where Sly's mouth is open in shock to what he is seeing on the big screen. Sly then turns around, and Zack dives down onto him from the ring, slingshotting himself over the top rope! Malibu then straddles Sly, and lets loose with a bevy of punches to the face! A large group of officials and enhancement talent then run out from the back, and pull an enraged Malibu off of Sly! MC This entire mess has gotten way out of hand! Sly gets to his feet, and charges at Zack! Both men are brawling, and get seperated by the group that came out to calm this situation down! After trying to fight it off, Zack convinces the people holding him back that he's calmed down, and is ready to go back to the locker room. He teases leaving calmly, but then performs a running dive, and practically crowdsurfs his way back to Sly! Both men start throwing punches again before they get seperated, and eight men have to literally carry the World Heavyweight Champion down the ramp! COACH Folks, this has gotten way too personal between these two, and this explosion has gone off! We're...we're running out of satellite time! CABOOSE Damn it! MC We apologize for the nature of the final minutes of the program, but we invite you to come back next week, when everything gets back to order! For Jonathan Coachman and Caboose, this is Michael Cole saying, "Good fight, good night!" The show closes with Sly and Zack intensely staring at each other from both ends of the aisleway, with a large crowd surrounding both men to keep them seperated. *End of Show*

COACH And we’re back. Here comes Simon Stone, looking more determined than I’ve ever seen him. CABOOSE My god, I’ve NEVER seen such determination. Oh good god, HOW inspiring.....but I’m sticking with my 10-second prediction. He doesn’t have a shot. As Simon Stone walks into the ring, the arena somewhat darkens into a different shade. “You woke up this morning……..Got yourself a gun……….Mama always said you’d be……The Chosen One.” Drek Stone steps out of the entranceway to a fairly loud series of boos. As he walks to ringside, he can’t help but smirk at the competition awaiting him in the ring. At the bottom of the ramp, he makes sure to flex his arms for the audience, which only earns him more boos. Finally, he rolls into the ring and pounds his chest for the audience. After this action, fireworks begin to rise from the four corners of the ring. As the music comes to an end, he stares at Simon with both a look of disdain and comfort as well. CABOOSE What an entrance. This man truly does have it all. COACH Caboose, this is getting to be a little much. Why don’t you just ask the guy for his phone number? CABOOSE Coach, you are such a gavone. It’s pathetic. COLE Gavone?! CABOOSE Of course. I learned it from Drek. The man truly has an excellent vocabulary. The two men stare at each other from across the ring. They slowly walk towards one another, wiggling their hands as if prepared to strike. Finally, they lock up in a grapple. Drek quickly catches Simon in a headlock. Seeing this as a quick victory, he grins to no one in particular. But Simon throws him into the ropes. Drek bounces off the ropes and somersaults under a clothesline. As Simon turns around, he gets knocked down by a surprise dropkick. CABOOSE What did I tell you? Such athleticism! COLE Although he seems to have already gone over your 10 second prediction. Upon getting up, Simon locks up in a grapple with Drek. This time, Drek forces Simon against the ropes. The referee attempts to split them up but, after getting untangled, Drek gives Simon a hard slap to the face. Walking away, Drek begins laughing at what he just did. But it’s easy to see that Simon is furious over what just happened. After stroking his face for a few seconds, he runs towards Drek and brings him down with a tackle. COACH There we go, baby! Now that’s the way we do it! Simon begins to pepper Drek with a few punches, but Drek quickly throws him off. They both pop back to their feet. Simon runs and brings down Drek with a clothesline. Drek immediately springs back up and is brought down with another clothesline. As Drek gets back on his feet, Simon runs into the ropes. But he gets caught by surprise with a textbook powerslam. CABOOSE He was lulling Simon Stone into a false sense of security! Brilliance! Amazing psychology! Instead of going for the cover, Drek gets up and begins showboating for the fans by pounding his chest. He slowly picks Simon up, but Simon starts to give him shots to the midsection. COLE He’s coming back! Simon’s coming back! Simon runs into the ropes again, but Drek quickly puts his arms around and throws him nearly halfway across the ring with a belly-to-belly suplex! However, this time, he doesn’t look like he wants to play for the fans. He quickly picks Simon up by his hair and throws him into the corner. He begins to hit him with lefts and rights, until Simon is forced to slump down in the corner, in an attempt to protect himself. Drek begins to choke him up with his boot, until the referee finally forces him to separate. COACH Is it that hard for Drek to obey the rules? I would think he would know by now that cutting off a guy’s oxygen is against the rules! CABOOSE I’ve been meaning to get that changed……talk about a stupid rule….. At this point, much of Simon’s energy has been sapped. Drek slowly picks up Simon and brings him back down with a hard snap suplex. Once again, he begins playing to the crowd, enjoying the jeers they relay back at him. However, this time, he sits on top of Simon’s chest and begins handing out a series of blows to Simon’s forehead. Finally, after nearly ten punches, Drek gets off Simon’s chest, proud of the work he has done. Simon’s head is busted open! COLE Now he’s busted wide open! This is terrible! CABOOSE He should really get that checked out. Spontaneous bleeding is no joking matter. COACH It COULD be spontaneous…..or it could be the punches he just got to the forehead. CABOOSE What punches? Drek holds his arms up to crowd, looking like he’s ready to end it. He picks Simon up by the hair, but Simon gives Drek a stinging chop to the chest. He hits him with another chop…now a punch to the head….chop….punch…..Drek is beginning to look dazed! Simon irish-whips Drek into the ropes and hits him with a back spinning elbow. He quickly goes for the cover…. 1……. 2…… …..KICKOUT! Drek quickly gets up on his feet and Simon clotheslines him over the top rope! Simon steps out onto the apron, while Drek struggles to get off the arena floor. Once he’s up, Simon jumps off the apron to attack him. However, Drek moves out of the way, and Simon goes rolling onto the floor. Although that miss hurt him, Simon is determined to get back on his feet. But Drek is ready for him. As Simon gets up and turns around, Drek catches his arms. He then plants him with a SIDE EFFECT ONTO THE ARENA FLOOR! COLE What a move! Simon HAS to have broken a bone after that! CABOOSE What a move, indeed! Drek is willing to do whatever it takes to win! At this point, the camera cuts back to someone sitting alone in a dark room watching the Drek/Simon match on television. The view slowly rotates around until we see that it’s Damaramu in the chair with an angry look on his face. He looks almost transfixed by the match going on in front of him. In fact, he doesn’t even notice that there’s a camera directly in front of his face. Finally, the screen goes back to the match taking place in the ring. COLE It looks like we’re not the only ones interested in this match. CABOOSE Of course. Everyone wants to see Drek’s debut in the OAOAST. The Helddown camera gives us two more glimpses of the Side-Effect onto the concrete floor. Finally, Drek picks Simon off the ground and rolls him into the ring, within the proximity of a nearby ringpost. Drek slowly climbs up the turnbuckle and finally, once at the top, he stands looking at the fans and his back to Simon. COACH What could Drek be getting ready for now? CABOOSE Just watch! This is how he earned his nickname of Reckless! Drek jumps off the top turnbuckle with a HIGH springing moonsault……and CONNECTS WITH IT!! He remains on top of Simon, making the cover. 1……. 2…….. 3!!!! NO!!!! Simon put his foot on the rope at the last second! CABOOSE Dammit, once again, screwed by the rules of the OAOAST! COACH Why don’t you give Simon some credit for knowing his way around the ring? Commend somebody else for once! Drek looks somewhat in shock until a scowl crosses his face. He picks Simon up by the head and brings him into the center of the ring. He sets him up for a powerbomb……lifts him up HIGH……….but Simon slips out of Drek’s grasp and lands on his feet behind him!! He grabs Drek by the back of the head and hits a REVERSE DDT!!! COLE Yes!! That’s it!! It’s over!! HE’S GOT HIM!!! CABOOSE It’s over?! Are you kidding me?!?! Drek can get up from this!! COACH Make the cover, SIMON!!! 1……. 2…… KICKOUT! Drek is able to lift up his shoulder. This time, it’s Simon that looks to be the surprised one. He whips Drek into the corner, then stands on the second turnbuckle, getting ready to hit ten punches on Drek’s head. 1…… 2……. But Drek hooks Simon’s legs around his neck, and grabs him from behind. He runs out of the corner and absolutely SLAMS Simon into the mat with a running powerbomb!! CABOOSE Was that just a great counter or what? COACH Well, I do have to agree with you. Drek CLEARLY has some skill in the ring. By now, Simon’s face is just a mess full of blood. Drek gets up, but is seemingly stalking Simon, waiting for him to get up. Finally, after struggling for a little while, Simon is able to stand up. However, Drek quickly turns Simon around, kicks him in the stomach, and DRILLS HIM INTO THE MAT WITH AN IMPLANT DDT!! COLE He may have broken his neck! CABOOSE That’s the STONECUTTER, Cole. Learn it. Appreciate it! Drek just hit Simon with the STONECUTTER!! Drek hooks Simon up for the cover. 1….. 2….. But Drek picks Simon’s head off the mat!! He doesn’t look like he’s ready to end this thing, although Simon doesn’t appear like he could continue anymore. Drek forcefully picks Simon up off the mat, and hooks Simon’s head beneath his arm again. Once again, he jumps up and SPIKES SIMON’S HEAD INTO THE MAT with the Stonecutter!! Finally, he hooks the leg. 1…… 2…… 3!!!! It’s over!! The fans once again begin to boo as Drek stands up in the ring as a victorious superstar. Immediately, he starts to fix his hair with his hands, trying to mold it back into what it was at the beginning of the match. He starts to climb out of the ring, but stops halfway with a smirk on his face. He slowly walks back over to Simon and stands over him. He starts mouthing some words that the crowd can’t hear, and then gives Simon a vicious smack across the face. Finally, he climbs through the ropes and walks towards the back, holding his arms out for the crowd the entire way. COACH What was with that slap?! Why couldn’t he just leave the damn thing alone? CABOOSE It was just to show him who’s the head Stone in the OAOAST. I don’t think he’ll have to worry about Simon anymore. But anyway, an impressive debut for Drek Stone! What did I tell you? Drek has it all! COLE Oh, there’s no denying that Drek has some skill. Heavyweight Champion in three federations before…..however, his arrogance may be his downfall here. CABOOSE …….you thought he was going to get upset by Simon! Your opinion didn’t mean anything to me before and, beating all the odds, you have now managed to make it mean even less. Congratulations. The camera cuts away to Damaramu sitting backstage, watching Drek walk triumphantly towards the back. He begins to growl a little bit, then starts smacking his fists together. Finally, he KICKS OVER the nearby television, sending it hurtling towards the floor. The sound of the screen breaking can be clearly heard, but Dama doesn’t care. He stares at the broken television for a few seconds, then spits on it in disgust. He then walks off as the camera focuses on the pieces laying on the floor. The three announcers seem to be in shock. COLE ……..what could that be about? COACH While we get this chaos cleared out of the way, let's go to commercial break...when we come back, Zack Malibu tries to fend off the giant known as Gibraltar! Stay Tuned!

Cole: Last week CWM came out to the ring as if he was going to retire but he was interrupted by Cone. Cone had came to give his best wishes to his mentor and friend CWM. However CWM was seemingly enraged that Cone would interrupt his final moment and it looked like they were going to come to blows but Cone left the ring. Caboose: You don't interrupt a legend like CWM under normal circumstances much less when he's about to announce his retirement. Cone made a big mistake. Coach: CWM sent us a tape. Roll it... The camera cuts to a house. Hanging on the wall are framed pictures of CWM posing with various OAOAST alumni and hanging over the fire place is a framed OAOAST title belt. The camera pans back to show CWM standing in the doorway. CWM: That was my first title belt. These pictures are of me with men i've traveled up and down the road with, who I've fought with and who I've bled with. Nowhere will you find a picture of Cone on that wall. Cone never fought me. I taught that kid alot about the business but he never finished the last lesson. Any student has to be willing to take on their teacher. Larry Zbyszko broke his teacher's neck for example. Cone never had the balls to challange me. His greatest weakness is his sentiment. Cone, I know that you're watching. I want you to look at something. CWM takes off his shirt revealing numerous scars and cuts. CWM: This scar right here (CWM points to a long diagnal cut that stretches from navel to left peck.) This I got from The Sole Survivor when he put me through a table chest first. (CWM points to a series of shallow scars around his neck.) This is from when Zack Malibu put me through the Ambulance window. I have a story for every scar, cut, break, sprain, and bruise. I've bleed from one end of this globe to the other. Have you Cone? I don't think so. Since I joined the OAOAST I've progressed from being a degenerate, to being a sick sadist, to being a legend. If you're not careful I'm going to show you why I'ma legend. If you're not careful, I'm going to give you you're first scar. If you're not careful... (Camera pans in on CWM's scarred head) I'll end your careeer...and maybe more. CWM tosses the camera to the floor and smashes it. Damaramu is shown walking backstage through a narrow hallway. Once he gets to the end of the corridor, he opens the nearby door but Drek Stone walks right into him. The two men stare at each other for a few seconds. DAMA ……You walked into me. DREK I walked into you? Correction. You walked into me. DAMA What was that? What did you say, you cocky son of a bitch? I walked INTO YOU?!?! WHY DON’T YOU LOOK WHERE YOU’RE GOING?!?! *Damaramu moves closer to Drek, and now they’re standing nose-to-nose* DREK …….You’re crowding me. DAMA I’m crowding you, huh? Do something about it. DREK You want ME to do something about it? DAMA ……..what did I just tell you? DO something about it!! *The two men stare at each other for a few seconds* DREK ……I’m a busy man. I don’t have time to deal with these distractions. I have to go out there and wipe out Simon Stone. Do the same thing I did last week. But listen…..keep getting in my way……and I may just have to do the same to you. DAMA ……I’m still waiting for you to throw the first punch. *Drek stares at Dama for a few seconds, before finally leaving the same way he arrived before. Dama stares at the door for a couple of seconds, then punches it as hard as he could. DAMA NOBODY walks into me. NOBODY!! (Cut to Sofa Central) MC Last week, as you all know, Sly Sommers threatened to reveal something major about both his and Zack's pasts together that could ruin our World Champion for good. After having our staff investigate, we still cannot find out any inklings on what exactly this is. However, standing outside the Totally Endorsed locker room is Josh Matthews, who is attempting to get a word with the number one contender to the World Heavyweight Title, Sly Sommers. Josh, take it away! (Cut to Josh outside the TE locker room) JOSH I'm standing outside the Totally Endorsed locker room, trying to get a word with Sly Sommers... (Sly comes out of the door, talking to someone on a cell phone) SLY Listen, Cal...I didn't ruin anything of ours...I know. Listen, the only thing this is going to ruin is Malibu's cred as "The Wrestler of the People". Hey, I got to go; the media's callin'. Ciao. (Sly hangs up the phone) JOSH Can I get an interview with you? SLY (softly mumbles behind his hand) Aren't you supposed to be banned from being around me after that one tag match we had back last year? JOSH (mumbles back) Psssss....this is wrestling, there is no continuity. (back to regular voice) Anyway, so Sly...what was that phone call all about? SLY That was just me and Calvin discussing my situation over the phone. There is absolutely NOTHING that needs to be read into that. You hear me, NOTHING. JOSH You sure? It sounded like... SLY NOTHING is wrong between me and Cal. JOSH Okay, okay...now, what I'm here to find out is what is this big secret that you have about Zack Malibu? SLY Dude, you know me, right? You know that I wouldn't just spill all of my beans in a worthless interview segment, right? That means that you and all of those douchefaces out there will have to wait until I'm good and ready to reveal what I have to say. Okay? Good, I got to go ready myself for the blockbuster. 'Later, man. (Sly goes back to the Totally Endorsed locker room. He accidentally leaves it cracked open for a second, and the camera and Josh catch a climpse of Saint Andrew in the room. Josh tries to sneak his head in, but Sly sees him and slams the door) JOSH What the hell is Saint Andrew doing with Sly Sommers, just moments before the huge Zack Malibu/Gibraltar main event?!?!?!?! COMMERCIAL BREAK MC Let's go backstage, where I hear a very happy couple are at. ::We cut back to the locker room, where Chris Bryte and Tina are leaning up against the locker room door, kissing. Tina's wearing a white "Superwoman" baby-T, black jeans and white sneakers, with her hair pulled back into pigtails. Bryte's wearing a black and white Addidas track suit with white sneakers. In the background Panther's seated on a bench , clad in his black and red "PANTHER 215" gear, and wearing a red, white and black sweatband around his head. He's adjusting his knee and elbow pads as Bryte and Tina continue making out. Suddenly, Tina draws back from Bryte with a smile on her face:: Tina: So...(giggles) it's settled. On April 29th, I become Mrs. Chris Bryte! (sighs) Chris, I'm so excited! Bryte: Heh. You think you're excited now? Wait til you see what I've got planned for tonight! Tina: Aww Chris! Not another cock fight! Bryte: No, its not *that* exciting...but it's almost as good. Tina: Well what is it? Bryte: (smiles) How does a moonlight helicopter ride sound? Tina: That sounds great! Bryte: HAHA! I knew you'd like it. And to top it off, we get to start our honeymoon a few weeks early, because tonight, I've got us booked in the honeymoon suite in the finest hotel in the city! Isn't that awesome?! Tina: That's wonderful, Chris! ::Tina wraps her arms around Bryte's neck and plants a big kiss on his lips. In the background, Panther, now wrapping his wrists with black trainer's tape, looks somewhat irritated:: Bryte: Ya know what...I've gotta go make sure everything's set for tonight...you mind if I step out for a bit? Tina: No problem. I'll just wait here with Panther. Bryte: Good. I promise that this'll be a night you're gonna remember for the rest of your life. Tina: I'm sure I will. ::Bryte leans in and kisses Tina once more before exiting the room, leaving Panther and Tina alone. Tina is beaming as she slowly walks over to where Panther is seated:: Tina: (sighs) Panther...I can't believe that I'm actually getting married. I mean...I've been waiting for this all my life, and it's actually happening. I...I just can't believe it. ::Panther doesn't respond. Instead, he continues applying the last bit of tape to his left wrist, then disposes of the roll. Panther then reaches into his bag, pulls out out a pair of black grappling gloves, and as he's preparing to put them on, Tina takes a seat on the bench beside him and puts her arm around him.:: Tina: You know, P...I've been doing a lotta thinking. Ya know, me and you...we've been through a whole lot together over the past 4 years. I mean...whether it's been as friends, enemies or whatever, you've had more of an impact on my life than anybody I've ever known. Panther, you've helped me grow as a person, and for that, I'll always be grateful to you. ::Panther continues strapping on his gloves, not once making eye contact with Tina. Tina smiles, rubs his right shoulder and continues:: Tina: I owe you so much, Panther. And I've talked it over with Chris, and...well...he agrees. We want you to be the best man for our wedding. Would you like that? ::Panther fastens the velcro on his right glove, then pauses. With his forearms rested upon his thighs, Panther looks up at the ceiling, then lowers his head, looking down at the floor for a moment or two. A look of concern comes across Tina's face, but that look soon transforms into a smile as Panther raises his head and flashes her a half smile:: Tina: Well...will ya do it? Will you be our best man? Panther: (sighs) Nah. Tina: No? (Panther nods affirmatively) What do you mean no? Panther: Just what I said...no. Tina: C'mon Panther, I'd really like you to be there for me. Panther: Look, Tina, I'm sorry but...I can't. Tina: But why? You're...you're not still upset about what happened at Anglemania, are you? (Panther rolls his eyes) C'mon, Panther. Chris apologized already. He felt really bad about costing you that match... Panther: This isn't about the damn match! Tina: Well, what it is? ::Panther opens his mouth as if he's preparing to speak, but no words come out. He takes a deep breath, runs his right hand through his hair, then looks down at the floor once again.:: Tina: C'mon, Panther. We've known each other for 4 years now. You don't have to hold anything back from me. What's wrong? Panther: Tina....don't you think...well...you don't think that you're rushing into this thing with Bryte? Just a little bit? Tina: Panther... Panther: Seriously, Tina. How long have you known the man? What? 2 months? Tina: 3 months, actually. And no need to worry, Panther. I'm a big girl. I know what I'm doing. Panther: But Tina, 3 months...that's still a pretty short time. I mean...what do you even know about him? Tina: I know that I love him, Panther. And I wanna spend the rest of my life with him. Panther: Ti...(sighs) ::Panther rises from the bench and begins pacing the room. Tina slowly rises after him, and approaches him cautiously:: Tina: Panther... Panther: (turns to Tina) All I'm asking is that you think this shit through. I mean...I don't like this Tina. This whole thing...with you...Bryte...him running off after Anglemania...Tina, this just doesn't sit right with me. Tina: Well...frankly Panther, it doesn't matter how it sits with you. This isn't about you. This is my wedding! Panther: My God, Tina, will you just listen to me?! Tina: No, you listen! I love Chris and he loves me, and that's all there is to it. And I know that you don't like Chris. I know you've had your problems, Panther, but damn it, all I want from you is your support! Would it kill you to show me just a little bit of support?!?! Panther: Oh yeah! You like how you "supported" me and Di for our wedding a couple of years back. ::Tina suddenly stops dead in her tracks, shooting Panther a cold, cold glare. There's an tense silence between the two of them, and after a moment or two, Panther smiles nervously and shakes his head:: Panther: You know what? I don't even know why the hell I'm getting worked up over this. Like you said...it's your wedding! Tina: Thank you! Panther: Yeah. It's your wedding...just don't expect me to be there. Tina: I can't...I...(throws up her hands) FINE! That's fine. You wanna be an asshole about this, Panther, go right ahead. We'll be getting married with or without you there. ::Tina looks angry, and begins breathing deep, long breaths, apparently to try and calm herself down. She appears to succeed, looking somewhat sombre as she eyes Panther once again:: Tina: You know...I'm beginning to think that this little friendship between the two of us may have been a mistake. Panther: Hey, it's not like I asked for you to come back into my life in the first place. Hell, I'd be a helluva lot happier if I'd never met your ass in the first place! ::Tina looks down at the floor, hurt by Panther's comment:: Panther: You know...do whatever you wanna do! I don't give a fuck. You wanna marry Bryte? Fine! You do that. Just don't come running back to me when it all falls apart, because I'll tell you right now that I won't give a shit! I don't care about you! I don't care about the wedding...you could die for all I care. I wouldn't give a damn-- Tina: What did you say? ::Tina suddenly looks up at Panther, startling him. A nervous look appears across Panther's face and his mouth opens...you almost expect him to take back his last remark. However... Panther: Y-y-you heard me! You could die and I wouldn't care. I wouldn't give a damn! ::There's another tense silence between the two as they stare one another down. Tina's eyes begin to water, and a tear runs down her right cheek:: Tina: Well...(sniffles) if that's how you feel...well then consider me dead. I'm outta here. Panther: FINE! ::Tina turns and storms out of the room, slamming the door behind her as she leaves. Panther sneers as she exits, and begins breathing rapid, angry breaths as he paces back and forth about the room. Then, in a rage, he suddenly turns and flips over the bench that he was seated on, grabbing it by its ends and tossing it up against the wall. He then grabs his duffel bag and does the same, sending his clothes flying about the room in the process. After taking a moment to compose himself, Panther begins to pace the room once more, and we fade out.:: COMMERCIAL BREAK ::"State Prop (You Know Us)" hits the PA system and the arena slowly fades to black. Then, after approximately five seconds... **BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM~!** ...a HUGE pyro blast explodes on stage, and flashing red and white spotlights swarm the arena, roaming the crowd momentarily before converging on the entrance, where Panther appears from the locker room through a thick cloud of smoke. The crowd comes to its feet upon seeing Panther. However, instead of going through his usual entrance routine, the former 24/7 Champ heads straight down the ramp to ringside, with a look of anger and borderline sadness in his eyes. Upon reaching ringside, Panther slides into the ring, walks over to the far corner and rests his head against the top turnbuckle.:: Buffer: Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is scheduled for ONE FALL! Currently in the ring...hailing from Philadelphia, P-A...weighing in at One Hundred and NINETY-SEVEN POOOOOOUNDS...he is the CHAMPION OF CHAMPIONS...PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANTHHEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!! ::The crowd pops at the mention of Panther's name. However, he doesn't move from his position in the corner:: Cole: Man...Panther's in a foul mood here tonight. We saw earlier on, he had quite the altercation with his...well...I was gonna say former manager, but it appears that after what we've seen tonight, she's his former friend as well, and of course, I'm talking about Tina. Caboose: Well, this isn't love connection, Cole. I couldn't care less about what goes on between Tina and Chris Bryte. But I will say that after seeing what went down earlier on, I'm really worried about being in the same vicinity with this nutcase Panther. He's got some real anger issues he needs to take care of. Cole: Well, I feel sorry for whomever Panther's facing tonight. Coach: I agree. I'd sure hate to be facing him in the mood he's in. ::Panther's music dies down and the crowd clamors, awaiting the arrival of Panther's opponent.:: **SCCCCCCCCCCCCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH~!** ::The sound of fingernails running across a chalkboard plays over the PA system, and the crowd pops slightly as DEAN DOUGLAS' theme music hits the PA system. The arena lights dim, a baby blue exclamation point shines upon the stage, and the crowd gives a nostalgia pop as the Dean himself steps out from the locker room clad in his baby blue gown with matching singlet underneath. In his left hand is a black briefcase, and in his right...THE BOARD OF EDUCATION~! (a paddle) The Dean smiles as he starts down the entrance ramp towards the ring:: Buffer: His opponent...hailing from the UNIVERSITY OF HIGHER LEARNING~! Weighing in tonight at TWO HUNDRED AND THIRTY-FIVE POOOOUNDS...DEEEEEEAN DOUGLAS!!!!!!!! ::As the Dean continues his path to ringside, Panther remains in the corner, still in the same position. Upon reaching the ring, Douglas sets his briefcase and board on the apron before sliding into the ring:: Cole: Dean Douglas, ladies and gentlemen. Caboose: How much did they have to pay Shane to get him to do this? Cole: I dunno, but I'd assume it's a lot. Coach: Yeah well, I may have to change my pick on this one, guys! I mean, I like Panther...don't get me wrong! But Dean Douglas...this guy is GANGSTA! Cole: Gangsta?! What the hell are you talking about?! Coach: You heard Buffer! The University of Higher Learning! HE'S DOWN WITH THE CUUUUBE BABY! Ice Cube!!!!! WESTSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDE!!!!!!! Cole: (looks at Coach like he's a damn fool) Caboose: Coach, you've been drinking out of the toilet again, haven't you? Coach: Well...just a *little* taste. (licks lips) ::Douglas poses for the crowd for a few moments before turning to Panther, who's still got his head down in the corner. A smile comes across Dean's face. He walks back over to his briefcase, opens it up, and pulls out what looks to be a folder sheet of paper:: Cole: Douglas pulling something out of his briefcase! What the...that looks like...a dunce cap?! ::That's what it is. He unfolds the cap and, with a sly smile on his face, creeps up behind Panther and places it on his head. Startled, Panther brushes the cap off his head, turning sharply to see Shane glaring at him, laughing cockily. With that, Panther rolls his eyes, and... **WHAM** ...decks Douglas with a HARD right hand! **DING DING DING** The ref calls for the bell as Douglas climbs back to his feet, only to be floored with another right hand. Douglas right back up, and a third right hand puts him back onto the mat again! Cole: This bout is underway! Panther unloading on Dean Douglas! Caboose: He attacked the man before the bell! What a cheater. Douglas (still wearing his entrance gown) climbs back to his feet, dazed, at which point, Panther charges in on him, pulls the gown up over his head, and begins tearing into him with a series of kneelifts and forearms, driving the crowd into a frenzy! Caboose: No fair! This is absolutely unfair! Do something about this, ref! The ref steps in to pull Panther off of the Dean, giving Douglas the opportunity to free himself from the rope. He staggers back into the ropes and Panther moves in on him, catching him with a boot to the midsection, followed up by a hard right hand. He then grabs Dean's arm and sends him in with an Irish whip--NO! Reversal by Douglas sends Panther into the ropes. Douglas tries to catch Panther coming off with a clothesline, but Panther ducks under and continues to the other side. Douglas tries to catch him on the way back with a reverse elbow, but Panther ducks under that, catches Dean by his left arm and sends him into the ropes with an Irish whip, and as Dean comes off, Panther falls backwards, catching Douglas' legs and... Coach: Hey wait a minute... Cole: ROLLING CRAB! ROLLING BOSTON CRAB BY PANTHER!!! HE'S GOT IT LOCKED! YES! The crowd cheers as Panther sits back on the hold. However, before any real damage can by done, Douglas pulls himself hand over hand into the ropes and clutches the bottom rope for dear life. The ref calls for the break... Ref: Break it, Panther! 1...2...3...4! Panther breaks on four, and Douglas breathes a sigh of relief. His relief is momentary, however, as Panther moves right back in on him, kicking him HARD in the small of the back. Again! Panther then begins firing down with boots and knees to Douglas' lower back, each one causing the unruly educator to cry out in pain! Panther then reaches down and pulls the Dean back to his feet by his hair. He spins him around...and... **CRACK** Crowd: WHOOO~! HARD knife edge chop to the chest of the Dean! **CRACK** Crowd: WHOOOO~! Another sends Dean reeling back into the buckle, clutching his chest. Panther then grabs Douglas' right hand and whips him HARD into the opposite buckle. Douglas staggers forward out of the buckle, clutching his lower back, when Panther catches him by his hand again and whips him back to the original buckle. Panther moves in on Dean one more time, grabbing his right arm again and whipping him into the buckle with such force that Douglas bounces off and falls facefirst to the canvas. With a sinister glare in his eye, Panther slowly walks over to Douglas and hovers over him, taking a moment to look into the crowd, drawing a loud pop from them. Cole: Panther sending Dean Douglas from pillar to post. He has dominated this match here in the early going! What's he gonna do here? He reaches down and pulls Douglas back to a standing position. He looks into the crowd once more, then promptly locks the Dean up in a DREADED abdominal stretch! The crowd pops as Douglas begins screaming in pain! Cole: Abdominal stretch! Abdominal stretch by Panther! Caboose: He's viciously trying to break the Dean's back!!! He can't do this, Michael! Not to an educator! The referee knees down in front of Dean, asking him whether or not he can continue. With the referee positioned away from him, Panther smiles, reaches back and grabs the top rope for leverage. Douglas begins screaming and waving his free hand like a madman, and the crowd pops louder as Panther pulls on the rope. Panther then releases his grip on the rope just as the ref shifts around him to check. He questions Panther when he notices the ropes shaking, then asks the crowd if Panther was holding the ropes. The crowd responds in unison... Crowd: NOOOOOOO~! That's good enough for the ref, as he kneels back down to check on Dean. With the referee out of position again, Panther raises his index finger to his lips, signalling for the crowd to be quiet. Then, he reaches back and grabs the top rope once more, causing Dean to scream wildly yet again. The crowd goes wild yet again as Douglas flails his free arm wildly, however, when the ref tries to check the ropes a second time, Panther again releases just before being caught. The referee once again questions Panther, who looks at him with a "Who...me?" look. He questions the crowd once more, and again, they answer... Crowd: NOOOOOOOOO~! Caboose: Habitual liars! All of em! Cole: Stop! The ref once again kneels down to question the Dean, as Panther once more reaches back and grabs the top rope. Douglas again begins to scream, but this time, the ref shifts around and catches Panther in the act of holding the rope. The crowd boos as he calls for the break! Ref: Break the damn hold! 1...2...3... On 3, Panther shoves Douglas forward to his knees. Douglas attempts to crawl away from Panther, but he catches up with him, straddling Dean's back and hooking him up for an Iron Shiek-style camel clutch! Cole: The Camel Clutch now locked in! Panther continuing to work on the back of Douglas! Douglas manages a quick escape, however, slipping through Panther's legs, standing up behind him and shoving Panther forward into the ropes. Panther rebounds, and Douglas catches him in the small of the back with a well-placed forearm! A second. He then tucks his head under Panther's left arm, grabs a waistlock, and takes him up for a back suplex... BUT PANTHER COUNTERS, flipping up over his head and landing on his feet behind Dean. He grabs a rear waistlock... Coach: German coming up-- NO! Douglas fires off two reverse elbows to break Panther's grip. He then catches Panther by the hair, spins him around and charges forward with him, tossing him over the top rope... ...BUT PANTHER LANDS ON THE APRON! Caboose: Dean...watch it! Dean turns around and spots him, then charges in at Panther to strike him with a right hand, but Panther catches him coming in with a shoulder thrust to the midsection. A second one drives the wind out of Dean's body. Panther goes for a third... **CRACK** OH! But Dean raises the knee, catching Panther right on the side of the head. With Panther down on the apron, Douglas follows him out there, grabs him by his hair and pulls him into a standing headscissors. The crowd clamors as he wraps his arms around Panther's waist... Cole: Oh no! Caboose: He's not gonna...not a piledriver from the apron! Cole: He'll kill him! Douglas tries to lift Panther, but Panther blocks it by grabbing a hold of the middle rope. Panther then counters the move with a back drop, sending Douglas over his head, with the small of his back crashing hard off the lip of the ring apron. Douglas falls facefirst onto the floor, and the crowd pops as Panther eyes his opponent from the apron, then leans back up into the post. Cole: Uh oh! Panther's setting up for something! What's it gonna be? With the crowd cheering him on, Panther dashes across the apron, then dives off with a somersault senton onto the small of Douglas' back, causing him to writhe in pain. Panther climbs back to his feet and shoots another intense glare into the crowd, inciting chants of "PAN-THER, PAN-THER" Coach: Man! Ice Cube and the gang had better get here quick! The Dean's in some serious trouble! Cole: Panther's taking it to the Dean! Panther grabs Douglas by the hair and rolls him back into the ring. He then pulls himself back to the apron, propels himself to the top rope in a swift motion, then looks down onto Dean, who's trying to pull himself back to his feet. Suddenly, Douglas shoves the ref into the ropes, causing Panther to fall and crotch himself off the top rope. Cole: Aww c'mon! What a no good... Caboose: After all that Panther's done in this match, you're complaining about a little thing like that?! Cole: Well...you don't put your hands on the ref, Caboose! And Panther's in some trouble here. As Panther writhes in pain on the ropes, Douglas moves on him, catching him with a right hand to the forehead, then begins climbing to the second rope with Panther. Cole: What's this here?! Caboose: Looks like a superplex coming up! Douglas grabs Panther in a front facelock and shoots his arm over his head. He tries to take Panther over... ...but he can't! He tries it again, but Panther blocks it one more time, but Douglas' back is too damaged to lift him! Coach: C'mon, Dean! You can do it, put your back into it! Cole: Will you stop! Suddenly, Panther shoves Douglas from the top, causing him to crash heads with the ref on the way down. As Douglas and the ref roll around on the canvas, Panther stands on the top rope and measures Dean. Cole: Panther's up on top! The ref is down! Could it be the frog splash?! YES! Panther leaps off the top rope with his signature frog splash... BUUUUUUUUUT...Douglas rolls out of the way at the last second, causing Panther to get nothing but canvas! Wasting no time, Douglas crawls over to the corner and grabs the board of education! He pulls himself back to his feet, and turns towards Panther with the board. Cole: Douglas has got that damn paddle! What the hell is he gonna do?! Panther reaches his feet, and Douglas moves in on him, trying to catch him in the head with a shot with the paddle... But Panther ducks under and grabs Douglas in a Dragon Sleeper! Cole: Dragon Sleeper by Panther! He calls this the Truth Infection-- **WHAM** Cole: OH NO!!!!!! Before Panther can get the right arm hooked, Douglas swings the board up over his shoulder, catching Panther right in the face with it. Panther staggers back into the ropes, dazed. Douglas shakes off some of the effects of Panther's earlier attack, then charges at his foe... ...only to run into a NASTY looking superkick, which catches him square on the jaw. Both Douglas as Panther go down, and the fans begin clapping and stomping in unison, trying to rally Panther back to his feet. Cole: Both Panther and Douglas are down! Who's gonna be the first to reach a standing position. Will it be Panther?! Will it be the Dean?! Caboose: Douglas is getting up first! Indeed. He rolls over onto his knees and crawls over to the board, clutching it in his right hand. Cole: Damn it, he's got the damn board again! Caboose: He's gonna give Panther a taste of that board if it kills him...and it may kill Panther! Douglas walks over to the corner and climbs upon the middle rope, waiting for Panther to get back up. The referee is beginning to stir by this time, and so is Panther, who pulls himself onto a knee, shakes out the cobwebs, then pulls himself back to a standing position. Then, Douglas raises the board of education and leaps off the top at Panther... ... ONLY TO CATCH A HARD RIGHT HAND TO THE GUT!!!!!!!! The blow causes Douglas to drop the paddle and Panther picks it up, causing the crowd to pop. Dean turns to face Panther, who winds back and BREAKS THE BOARD over Douglas' head, KO'ing him and bringing the crowd to his feet! Caboose: HE BROKE THE BOARD!!!!! Cole: Douglas is down! Caboose: HE BROKE THE FRIGGIN' BOARD!!! WHAT THE FUCK?! Cole: The Dean is down! The ref starting to come to! Panther's headed up top! Indeed. Panther disposes of the evidence and leaps to the top rope as the ref begins to crawl into position. He measures Douglas, then leaps off with a beautifully executed frog splash... AND IT CONNECTS!!!!!!! Panther hooks the leg...the ref moves into position for the count... 1... 2... 3!!!!!!!! **DING DING DING** **Cue "State Prop (You Know Us)" Buffer: Here is your winner: PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANTHERRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!! Cole: He's done it!!! Panther has done it!!! He has defeated Dean Douglas! Caboose: Not only that, but he BROKE THE BOARD OF EDUCATION! HE BROKE THE DAMN BOARD ON NATIONAL TELEVISION!!!!! MY GOD, WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS LUNATIC?! HOW COULD HE DO SOMETHING SO DEPLORABLE?! Cole: Will you stop?! Caboose: NO I WON'T STOP! THIS MAN IS INSANE! HE BROKE THE BOARD OF EDUCATION...DEAR GOD!!!!!! WHAT KINDA MESSAGE DOES THIS SEND TO THE CHILDREN! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WILL SOMEONE PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?! Coach: WESTSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDE!!!!!!!!! ::The referee raises Panther's hand, drawing a pop from the crowd. Panther then heads over to the ropes and is preparing to climb to the outside, when suddenly, a ringside assistant approaches him with a blood piece of cloth:: Cole: What's this about?! ::Panther hops to the floor to consult the assistant:: Assistant: He said to give you this! (Hands Panther the cloth) Cole: Who said to give Panther that?! What is that?! ::Panther holds the bloody cloth up and looks at it...and his eyes open wide with shock when he realizes what it is. It's a white "Superwoman" t-shirt...soaked in blood. Panther sighs, looks up at the ceiling then starts back to the dressing room. We fade to commercial:: [commercial] ::We return from break to see Panther roaming the backstage area, looking for for something. He approaches a group of officials:: Panther: Hey...have any of you seen Tina?! ::The officials all shake their heads "no", and Panther moves on, continuing his search for her. Suddenly, he spots a gray door with splashes of blood on the knob. Panther takes a deep, nervous breath and opens the door. It leads to a stairwell. Panther walks into it, and starts down a flight of stairs, when he notices Tina at the bottom of the stairs, her head and upper torso covered in blood. Panther shudders upon seeing the sight, then rushes down to Tina's side to attend to her:: Panther: (grabbing Tina's head) Tina...Tina what happened?! (sighs) Oh my God! Tina! ::Distraught, Panther clutches Tina's head close to his chest and appears to be fighting back tears. Suddenly, we hear a door creak open in the background:: Bryte: WHAT DID YOU DO?!?! Panther: Huh?! Bryte: GET AWAY FROM HER!!!!!!! :: Panther drops Tina then turns to face Bryte, but before he realizes what's going on, Bryte leaps off the top of the stairs and catches him with a clothesline. Bryte then tears into Panther with a series of right hands before grabbing him by the hair and slamming him headfirst into the wall, knocking Panther unconscious. Bryte then turns and looks down at his bloodied fiancee:: Bryte: (tearing up) Tina...oh my God! HELP!!!! I NEED SOME HELP DOWN HERE!!! ::Bryte runs off to get help for Tina, and the camera focuses on Panther's and Tina's fallen bodies before fading out. ::

MC We're supposed to be going to our next contest, but I'm getting something in my headset about a possible disturbance in the parking lot...what? Cut to the parking lot, where Jackie Gayda is running around frantically, trying to find out what exactly is happening. Then, the camera picks up techno music in the background, and Jackie sees weird lights coming from the middle of the parking lot. She and the camera man then run to where they see the lights, and we find out that the music in the background was coming from there too, as we see a circle of cars surrounding a group of people dancing to the techno music with a fog machine and a light machine performing their jobs from the ground. GAYDA Is that...I think I see the Minions in there! The camera closes in, and it turns out that Michael and Nathaniel are in the pit, dancing. GAYDA Michael, Nathaniel...can you guys come here for a second? Nathaniel then climbs onto the car nearest to Jackie, and sits down on it Indian-style, while jiving to the music in the background. GAYDA What in the hell is going on?!? NATHANIEL Hey, baby...you don't got wires on those things, do you? (tries to shove his hand down her top, she slaps him) GAYDA You perv! What in the world is the meaning of all of this? NATHANIEL This is our liberation, baby! This is the stuff that Saint Andrew wouldn't let us do. This is US! This is Mikey and Nate Tethers...this is the way that we live life! (shoves pills from his right hand down his throat) Now that's the good (bleep)! GAYDA Can we even show this on TV? NATE I don't know, sweety, but I know you can show this on TV! (starts unzipping his fly before his brother comes over and smacks him in the back of the head) MIKEY What's wrong with you? I told you...if you give away the goods for free, you won't get any demand for your supply! NATE I thought that was only for the cok... MIKEY Shut up! We're on TV! GAYDA What are you guys on? NATE Many things, babe. We're on PC... MIKEY You want to get arrested? Then go back to the rave! NATE Fine, maaaan. (dances back to middle of pit, where he's surrounded by two underage-looking females) GAYDA Umm, Mikey...I guess...can you please explain this whole thing better than your brother? MIKEY Sure, babe. You see, what Andrew did last week didn't hurt us. Sure, we were battered and bruised. But, it gave us a message. You see, we were living a really good life under the trance that is being a Minion for a sacreligious goofball. But, we weren't havin' fun. What you're seein' right now...this is how we used to have fun. We used to break into dance clubs when we were barely into puberty, and we would dance the night away. GAYDA *cough*...What's all that smoke? MIKEY (yells behind him) Dude, I told you not to light that stuff up if we had cameras on us! (turns his attention back to Jackie) Sorry...it's nothing, absolutely nothing. GAYDA I get it...this is one giant drug party, isn't it? MIKEY We would prefer if you would call it a "rave". Now, with that being said.... (OAOAST D.O.A. Abe Vigoda suddenly stumbles into camera view.) ABE What in the heck is this? MIKEY This is what happens when you decide not to book the single most talented, innovative, spectacular, fresh tag team in the world, the Rave and Assault Squad! ABE What in the world is that? MIKEY That's myself and my brother Nate, alongside our newest partner-in-crime...(signals a third, smaller man over)...this is BlueCrush87! BC87 Just use the initials, boy! MIKEY Be cool, man...be cool. Abe, BC87 over here can do some of the most unreal stuff that you 'ever seen in that ring! You hire this kid, and you'll ABE That's all fine and dandy, but why are you dancing and obviously using illegal drugs? MIKEY This is how we kick it, and if you don't like how we kick it, you get kicked out! We're showin' you that we aren't one-hit wonders; we're here for the long run! So...are you gonna give us a shot? ABE I have seen tapes...and between my Matlock breaks and my random petting zoo visits, I was thoroughly impressed. So, you guys got yourself a shot next week. MIKEY What about that Tag Team Title situation? We want a shot at that! ABE You impress me next week, and you'll be in consideration. Trust me. MIKEY Whatever, dude. Yo, boys...gather your stuff; we're headin' out! (Everyone dancing starts to go inside the cars, as Mikey goes to turn off the music and take the boombox into his car. Everyone drives off in a crooked line, as Abe stands there in the dust with Jackie.) ABE If those were my grandkids, I would make sure they had MUCH better (bleep). (Cut back to Sofa Central) MC Those...were the Minions?!?!? CABOOSE They ain't the Minions anymore, daddy! Hey, Coach...wasn't that one chick in the dancing pit your daughter? COACH What do you mean? I've never had s...I mean, I ALWAYS use protection when I consumate my marriage! We cut backstage, as "Ice Heart" Dan Black, tall and lean in his black trenchcoat, strides down a corridor. Behind him, clad in a sparkling gold cowboy suit, bounces Jivin' Jim Ross, Dan's new and increasingly deranged manager. JIVIN' JR But- but Dan! Don't you want to connect with the crowd? BLACK What? No, I don't give a crap about the crowd! What IS wrong with you? I hired you for your wrestling knowledge, not to dress up like a gay cowboy! JR Look, your little "Smashy Pumpkin" song is all well and good, but really Dan, you can't dance to it, can you? I wanna get everyone dancing like a frog on heat! BLACK Is that another Texan expression? Because I'm from London, it really confuses me when you- JR BAH GAWD! I just thought of it! The perfect entrance song for you! I'll go get the sound guys to fire it up! BLACK But- JR Just wait, Danny boy! It'll be awesome! JR scuttles off. Dan stops in his tracks, holds his head in his hands and sighs. We cut back to the announce table. COACH BAH GAWD! BAH GAWD! STONE COLD! DAN BLACK! CABOOSE Will you stop that? COLE We're just so excited about having a legend like Jim Ross on HeldDown! We want to be just like him when we grow up! CABOOSE Just try and contain your passion, ok boys? COLE Well, we'll see JR up next as Dan Black has his open challenge! We understand someone has accepted the task of taking on Dan, but we havn't been informed WHO will step into the ring with the OAOAST Adrenaline Champion. COACH What the hell is that title anyway? CABOOSE Some IntenseZone crap. Let's get to the ring. BUFFER Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is-fzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz COLE The hell? Buffer looks at his dead mic sadly, but the crowds attention is diverted by the flood of black smoke pouring out of the entranceway. A storm of white sparks sprays up from the floor, mingling with the smoke, until we get a large pyro BLAST and- Cue: Village People, "In the Navy" CABOOSE Hey Cole, you like these guys! Dan Black emerges through the smoke with Jivin' Jim Ross dancing just behind him. There's a disgusted look on Dan's face behind his black shades as he walks down to the ring. JR stops to throw some shapes at the crowd, taking off his hat and hopping around repeatedly, until he runs out of breath and has to stagger the rest of the way to the squared circle. Dan steps through the ropes and removes jacket and shades, revealing the OAOAST Adrenaline Title strapped around his waist, sparkling against Dan's black, silver trimmed tights. The music thankfully stops, and JR has a mic. JR BAH GAWD! Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is set for one fall and is for the OAOAST ADRENALIN TITLE! Introducing, already in the ring, from London England, weighing 242lbs....he is a former OAOAST TV champion, former OAOAST USTV champion, former two time OAOAST Tag Team champion, former OAOMEF World Champion, former OAOMEF Tag Team Champion, final 3 competitor of OAOAST Royal Rumble 2004 and two time and THE reigning and defending OAOAST Adrenaline Champion.......Daaaaaaaaaaaaan BLACK! JR collapses, breathless, as Dan raises his arms to greet the BOOs which his introduction has produced. With Jivin' Jim Ross on the floor, kicking his legs feebly in an effort to dance, Buffer has a replacement mic. BUFFER Aaaaaaaaaaand his opponent... Cue: Dope - "Debonaire" The lights drop down... BUFFER From Detroit, Michigan, weighing 375lbs......Guuuuuuuuuuuuner SHARPS! Dan's mouth drops open a little as the 7ft monster comes striding down the aisle, beating his chest. JR looks up as he approaches, and appears to be salivating at the sight of the hoss. Ross extends a hand to try and touch Sharps, but Gunner kicks him aside and jumps onto the ring apron. Sharps enters the ring and immediately charges at Dan, levelling him with a huge lariat! DING DING DING Our referee quickly calls for the start of the match, as Buffer scrambles out. The ref places the Adrenalin title in the corner of the ring. COLE Well well, Gunner Sharps. Not the kind of challenge Dan would have wanted for his first match. COACH That Adrenalin Title could be in trouble already! Sharps picks a stunned Dan off the mat and plants him back again with a HARD scoop slam. Black's back bounces off the canvas and he arches it in pain, shouting out. CABOOSE When Gunner slams you, you're falling from a hell of a height. Dan needs to make this technical. Like him or not, he's a great scientific wrestler. Gunner drops down for an early cover: ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Sharps drags Dan up and whips him hard into the corner. Gunner charges in with a shoulder but Black falls to one side to evade him and Sharps slams into the turnbuckles. Dan grabs Sharps' arm and tries a whip, but Gunner reverses it to send Dan to the ropes. As Black bounces back Gunner grabs him up into a Gorilla Press! Dan quickly escapes however, slipping out of Sharps' grasp and sliding down his back to the mat. Black slams a forearm into the kidneys of his opponent, and uses his right boot in the back of Gunner's leg to push him down to one knee, and from that position locks on a sleeper! The crowd BOOs Dan's defensive tactics, but Gunner is only in the hold for seconds before rising to his feet and flinging Dan off his back. COLE No luck for Black with the sleeper, he'll need to hurt Gunner with more before he can think about putting him out. COACH But this man is a monster! I don't think Dan can win this one. He shouldn't have laid out that challenge... Dan scrambles up and meets Gunner in the middle of the ring. Black throws a chop into the huge chest of Sharps, but Gunner shrugs it off and cracks Dan with a forearm that sends him staggering backwards. Sharps grabs Dan by the left arm and whips him off the ropes. As Black rebounds, Gunner hoists his huge right leg into the air, aiming a crushing big boot at Dan's skull. Black ducks at the last minute and moves behind Gunner, leaping into the air and dropkicking him in the small of the back. The kick propels Gunner into the corner, and Dan follows with a diving shoulder into his back. Black follows up with a flurry of kicks into the same area. CABOOSE Dan's clearly targetting the back of the big man. Not a bad move, if his back's hurting he'll find it harder to hit his big power moves and throw Dan around. Dan grabs the arm and whips Sharp across the ring to the opposite corner. As Gunner collides with the turnbuckles, Dan quickly removes the padding from the top turnbuckle in his corner. The referee tries to stop Black, but he pushes him away. Meanwhile, Jivin' Jim Ross picks himself up and starts to dance around the ring, waving his hat and stomping his gold boots to try and get the crowd behind Dan. For his efforts, JR gets pelted with garbage. Back in the ring, Dan tries to whip Sharps into the exposed turnbuckle, but Gunner reverses the whip so that its Dan whose back eats steel! Dan stumbles back into the ring and into a full nelson from Gunner! Sharps hauls Dan into the air, and powers him to the mat with a full nelson slam! Cover! ONE! TWO! TWO AND A HALF! THRE-KICKOUT! COACH That was close! Dan just inches away from losing his title. He needs to find away to combat this monster. CABOOSE JR is his manager, he should do something instead of prancing around like a fool! Gunner brings Dan up and gestures for- COLE All Guns Blazing! That running powerbomb! Black's in big trouble here... Sharps is about to get Dan up, when he's distracted by something...a figure walking down the ailse... COACH It's Axel! Out to help his friend... Axel reaches ringside, but Gunner doesnt appear pleased to see him and releases Dan to shout to him. As the two argue, with Sharps pointing Axel to the back, Dan slowly gets to his feet. The referee is getting involved, and is shouting at Axel when Dan NAILS Gunner with a hard lowblow! Gunner shouts in pain and crumples to his knees next to the ropes. COLE Gunner just got CASTRATED! CABOOSE I guess he know what it feels like to be you then, Michael. Axel jumps on the apron after Dan, but the ref blocks him. With the officials attention still diverted, Jivin' Jim Ross boogies around the corner in front of Gunner, and reaches into a pocket in his cowboy suit... Ross brings something out...raises his arm...and shatters a large bottle of barbecue sauce on the head of Gunner! COACH Oh no! Jim Ross' special sauce! Gunner falls back into the ring, sauce and glass covering his head, and Dan shoves the referee into Axel, who falls to the floor. Black covers Gunner, as the ref reluctantly counts... ONE! TWO! TWO AND A HALF! THREEEEEEEEEEEEE! DING DING DING BUFFER The winner of the match and still Adrenalin Champion, Dan BLACK! COACH Man, what a screw job! To Dan's obvious relief, "Quiet" hits and Black leaves slowly, with JR dancing behind him. Axel enters the ring, but Gunner is up and shoves his concern away angrily. COLE Axel and Gunner are clearly not on the same page here, and Axel just cost Gunner that match! COACH Dan Black gets away with a win in his first contest on HeldDown, but he's not going to be so lucky every week. COLE But who's going to wrestle him when there's a chance of getting hit with JR's special sauce? CABOOSE Well, you, obviously. COLE It's true... COACH Anyway...let's get to commercials... COMMERCIAL BREAK

We're live once again after the commercial break, and a crowd pop is heard in the background, as the scene opens to Zack Malibu in his uber-swank dressing room, pacing a bit in front of the trademark comfy leather sofa, where Candie sits. CANDIE Zack, sit down, calm down, please? ZACK Sit down? Easy for you to say. I can't believe that ungrateful... Candie stands up, and stops Zack from pacing any further. CANDIE It's jealousy. You see what you're doing? He WANTS you to do this. You're turning this into a bigger deal than it is? ZACK Am I? I know him, and I know exactly what he's going to say, and... *knock, knock* Zack and Candie, startled, look at each other, before Zack says "come in" to the mystery knocker. The door opens, and walking into the room (and into the scene) is the new Director of Authority, Mr. Abe Vigoda! ZACK Abe, hey man, great to see you. ABE Now now don't give me that bull. I don't like looking in a mirror, so you shouldn't think it's great to see me. How are you young lady? CANDIE I'm fine Abe, how're you? ABE If I said fine, I'd be lying. I just came by to tell you that I've made things official, and at the pay per view you're going to be putting your title on the line against the number one contender, Sly Sommers. Zack rolls his eyes. ZACK Yeah...I figured. ABE Well you figured right. The number one contender tends to get first shot at a belt, you know. ZACK Abe, it's not a matter of facing the number one contender. It's a matter of facing...him. ABE Well let me tell you. I'm going to be facing "him" soon, and before I do that, I'd appreciate seeing my World Champion take on Sly Sommers. I didn't think that it was too much to ask. ZACK It's not. It's just...let's just say it's going to get really personal, really quick. ABE Good, good. That means ratings will go up. Unfortunately, I need medical assistance in that area...but I've said too much. I'll be in my office if you need me, Zack. Good day, miss. CANDIE See ya, Abe. Abe Vigoda exits, as Zack seems to be more po'd about his current dilemna. COLE I've never seen Zack Malibu this concerned. What does Sly Sommers have up his sleeve? We'll find out tonight, here on HeldDOWN~! ::Cut to the DOA Office, where Abe Vigoda is busy with paperwork, or whatever it is the GMs do, in his office when there's a knock on the door:: ABE: "Come in." ::Camera pans to the opening door, revealing none other than the reigning 24/7 Champion, Crystal, followed by, of course, an ever-present cameraman:: CRYSTAL: "Hi. I don't think we've been introduced. I'm Crystal." ABE: "Ah, Crystal. The 24/7 Champion. I'm Abe Vigoda, as you probably know. How's the new rule of being followed by a camera 24/7 treating you?" CRYSTAL: "To tell the truth Mr. Vigoda..." ABE: "Call me Abe." CRYSTAL: "Alright. To tell the truth Abe, I have a bit of a problem with it. You see..." ABE: "Is it the lack of privacy bothering you?" CRYSTAL (shaking her head): "No, it's not that. I grew up in a big family, so I'm used to not having any privacy. It's just that..." ABE: "Is it that you always have to be on guard, because anyone could be around the corner ready to attack?" CRYSTAL (shaking her head again): "No, it's not that either. I've been 24/7 Champion before. I'm used to that." ABE: "Well then, what is it?" CRYSTAL (sighing): "Could it be possible to get a cameraman who isn't like a horny teenager that hasn't seen a naked girl before?" ABE (confused): "Huh?" CRYSTAL (turning around, staring accusingly at the cameraman): "This pervert seems to think it's just great to try to film me getting out of the shower. I don't know why, maybe he wants to brag to his friends, but I'm about *this close* to inflicting bodily harm." ABE (to the cameraman): "Did you get a peep?" CRYSTAL: "WHAT?!? Of course he didn't! I would have made him eat the freaking film!" ABE (smiling): "Good. Wouldn't want anything roaming the internet, right? Anyways Crystal, I'll try to fix this problem. But you have to understand, it's hard to find a willing cameraman to film 24/7." CRYSTAL(sighing): "Alright, I understand. But don't blame me if you have a permanantly injured cameraman soon. (turning to the cameraman again) And you! If I catch you doing anymore boob or ass shots, you'll be eating that camera for lunch, got it?" ::The cameraman nods and follows Crystal out of the room as Abe just shakes his head and chuckles.:: (Cut to a shot in the parking lot) COLE Look at this. A jet-black stretch limousine has just pulled into the parking lot. CABOOSE Good to see your eyes still manage to work, Cole. COACH What a beautiful vehicle. But who could be inside? The limo driver gets out of the front seat and walks towards the back of the car to open the door. Yet, just as he gets near the backseat, the door swings open, nearly smacking the driver to the side. Drek Stone slowly saunters out of the limo with a smile on his face. Unsurprisingly, he’s dressed for success with a coal-black suit jacket and a sky-blue cashmere undershirt, along with expensive looking sunglasses. Seeing the startled chauffeur propping up against the car door makes Drek smile even more. DREK Listen, you really need to watch yourself. Seriously. You just never know when those car doors are going to pop out and surprise you. CHAUFFEUR Yes, sir. Very sorry. DREK I accept your apology. Now, to thank you for the drive here tonight, I have something for you. The chauffeur holds out his palm, obviously expecting a monetary tip. DREK *oblivious to the limo driver’s palm* Yes, it is truly invaluable. Do me a favor. As soon as your drive out of here, go to the nearest locksmith and buy a safe. High security. Immediately stick this item into the safe, and hide it somewhere. You never know just how much this thing will be worth in a few years. You could take it out and show it to your kids……they’ll just love me. Drek Stone pulls a glossy photograph of himself out of his jacket pocket and smoothly hands it to the limo driver DREK There you go, sir. Your life has been truly blessed with such riches. Sometimes it even amazes me to see just how good of a person I actually am. Good luck with your newfound wealth. CABOOSE What a thoughtful gift. Already, Drek is one of the more GENEROUS superstars in the OAOAST lockerroom. COACH Are you sure you mean generous instead of cheap? CABOOSE What kind of question is that? This guy’s life is now officially MADE! What an amazing human being Drek Stone is. Drek pulls his piece of luggage out of the vehicle and slowly begins to walk with it. However, after taking a few steps, he’s forced to stop. There’s someone standing in front of him, although the camera doesn’t yet have his face. It slowly spins around until we finally see the face of Simon Stone. DREK What the hell is this?! Who are YOU to stand in my way?! I would suggest you move, or you may just find yourself looking even more deformed than you do at this point. Christ, man, I didn’t realize they let disgusting dregs of society like yourself still walk around. SIMON I’m not going ANYWHERE! DREK Oh really? Is that so? Drek begins to roll up his sleeves, preparing for an altercation right there in the parking lot. DREK I understand the risks involved here right now. It’s very possible that your blood could wind up on my suit, or that I may walk away with a bruised fist from using you as my punching bag for too long. But these are risks I think I’m willing to take….. SIMON No! You won’t dictate to ME when we fight. I will NOT fight here! Not in the parking lot. I want you in the ring…..and I want you in the ring TONIGHT! DREK Heh……do you really? Well, I don’t have too many problems with that. I just hope you find somebody to cover your hospital bills - those things can be a bitch to deal with. SIMON Don’t be so sure it will be me that needs it. Simon Stone quickly walks away from Drek and out of the parking lot. Drek seems frozen in one place, a surprised smirk stuck on his face. Finally, he lets out a low chuckle, grabs his luggage, and begins to walk towards the doors to the arena. DREK This paisan is a dead man…… COLE Finally! Someone will be standing up to Drek Stone! Hopefully, Simon will put this obnoxious athlete in his place. COACH Simon looked furious when he was standing in front of Drek. Could we actually see an upset in Drek’s OAOAST debut? CABOOSE You’re right, Coach. In fact, I agree with you. I think we WILL see an upset tonight. Drek will wind up setting a record for the quickest win in an OAOAST ring. Even I didn’t think before tonight that HE would be the one to hold the honor. I sure hope they’ll have a Snickers Crunch commercial ready or something. COMMERCIAL BREAK